Top 10 Idiots

Top 10 Idiots's Journal

December 19, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-24: 2018 Year In Review Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-24: 2018 Year In Review Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! I know, right? It’s the end of the year for the Top 10 and what a year it’s been! Now don’t be sad, we will be back in January with the start of, holy shit, I can’t believe it’s our 6th season and our 4th year in operation. Yes, next year the Top 10 will turn 4! But in Trump years it feels like we’re 237 doesn’t it? Well we’ve got some big plans for 2019 that I cannot wait to unveil including our big Texas road show for the start of season 7. Yes, we have not one, not two, not three, but a whopping 5 shows planned through the Lone Star State. We are going to go through the state of Texas to find out not only what the political landscape is like, but if liberals really do exist in the Lone Star State, and they must because a whole lot of them voted for Beto in the election! There’s also planned shows in Montana, Alaska and Vancouver! We’ve also got a whole slew of new content being planned and some of our old favorites will keep coming back like How Is This Still A Thing and People Who Somehow Got Elected, and This Fucking Guy. So of course just like last year, this year is our 2018 year in review and man there was a lot of crazy shit that happened this year. Even going into the new year things are still fucked up, which means we won’t get to cover things like Michael Cohen’s sentencing and Trump’s use of the phrase “smocking gun”, and more excuses for ultra paranoid conservatives to bash social media sites because they don’t get to float their tin foil hat conspiracy theories, or Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer throwing Trump in front of a brick wall. OK that’s enough of the intro, we have a lot of idiocy to get to. But first we have to play the awesome cold opener from Saturday Night Live that really pissed off a certain someone who we will be discussing later:

Here we go, folks! It’s our second annual YEAR IN REVIEW!!!! Oh that was some good reverb right there, guys! So in the first slot is the months of January and February (1) we had stable geniuses, shithole countries, secret societies called “Secret Society”, and Sean Hannity’s epic fail, among other atrocities being committed. The second slot this week is March and April (2) – where Trump went golfing after one of the worst mass shootings in a school since Columbine. And it was also when Rex Tillerson got fired. In the third slot this week is May and June (3). May – when Trump turned around the dialogue on gun rights, claiming that gun were not to blame for shootings, while he nearly brought the world to the brink of Armageddon opening the US embassy in Isreal, while conservative snowflakes faced the humiliation of eating in public while conservative. Next up in the fourth slot is July and August (4) - where we got introduced to space Nazis, Duncan Hunter got busted by the feds, and we had lots of stories of white people calling the cops on black people, because they’re black. Also, Trump is still a dick and that’s not surprising. In the fifth slot this week is September and October (5) – where we had the horrifying murder of Jamal Khashoggi, Alex Jones screamed at a pile of poop, and we got introduced to Brett Kavanaugh, and his insane schedules and Boofing, whatever that is. Finally for the sixth slot this week we have November and December (6) – where Trump got his *ASS* handed to him in the midterms, California is on fire, and Trump fired Jeff Sessions and replaced him with a real life Mr. Clean. Now that that’s out of the way, at number 7, we’re going to forgo our weekly investigative piece this week “Top 10 Investigates” (don’t worry, it will be back in January) and we were going to have a piece on sex robots, but that will be shelved and put on the next Idiots Best Of. But then Trump had to attack Saturday Night Live, so we’re bringing back “Explaining Jokes To Idiots!” (7). Then for the 8th slot, we haven’t forgot our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” (8), where our resident pastor is going to tell you some of his favorite stories of the ultra far right religious nutbags this year. And in the number 9 (NEIN!) slot we have People Are Dumb where we’re going to tell you all of our favorite stories of stupid people throughout 2018 – and there were plenty of them! And the final segment of Deep State Diaries is going to explore the organization that Trump trolls love to hate – the IRS! Yes, we came all this way just for an IRS joke! And we’re going to wrap it up with a guest I can’t wait for – the one, the only 30 Seconds To Mars! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]January – February
[br] [/font] [br]

So this is our second annual year in review and man it was a batshit crazy year, and of course like all horrible things Trump and Fox News had a hand in it. Where do we even begin to cover the beginning of the year at the end of the year? I know! Let’s start with that time when Trump called himself a “stable genius” and when he referred to countries as “shithole countries”. I mean hell we totally stopped our world tour in the middle of it and went with a “shithole” world tour!

UPDATED | Senator Lindsey Graham responded Monday to tweets from President Donald Trump touting himself as "a very stable genius" amid questions of his mental fitness while serving in the White House's top role.

"Trump called himself 'like really smart and a stable genius.' So, do you think he's like really smart and a stable genius?" The View host Bette Midler asked the South Carolina Republican to audience laughter.

"I think this: if he doesn't call himself a genius, nobody else will," Graham responded to applause.
http://www.newsweek.com/donald-trump-genius-lindsey-graham-774238

I mean really is he Simple Jack from Tropic Thunder? Or maybe he’s Homer Simpson?

But then of course we’re only in the second week of January! I mean do I really have to remind people of when Trump referenced certain countries in Africa and called them “shitholes”? Yes, a PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES IS ON RECORD calling countries in Africa and South and Central America shit holes, just let that sink in for a moment.

WASHINGTON ― Most news networks reporting on President Donald Trump’s remarks about restricting immigrants from “shithole countries” notably didn’t shy away from using the vulgar word, and called the president’s insult what it was ― racist.

But over at Fox News, Trump’s network of choice, hosts and panelists were defending the president’s crude comments before shifting to other topics.

After The Washington Post on Thursday afternoon first reported Trump’s remarks at a White House meeting with lawmakers, “The Five” co-host Jesse Watters shrugged off the slur as the way ordinary Americans talk about “Haiti people.”

“If it’s true, this is how the forgotten men and women in America talk at the bar,” Watters said. “This is how Trump relates to people. If you’re at a bar, and you’re from Wisconsin, and you’re thinking, ‘They’re bringing in a bunch of Haiti people, or El Salvadorians, or people from Niger.’ This is how some people talk.”
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/fox-news-trump-shithole_us_5a58aaa4e4b0720dc4c64a73

Yes, the denial is strong with this one indeed! Oh and then there was one of my favorite things of the year – remember when the results of Trump’s physical were released and people were demanding to see his long form girth certificate? Yeah that happened. I mean Trump’s doctor might as well have gone to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College. Seriously, baby, I can prescribe anything I want!

A White House physician declared Tuesday that President Donald Trump is in “excellent” overall health and that he performed “well” on a cognitive screening exam, while noting the commander in chief could benefit from a low-fat diet and additional exercise.

“All clinical data indicates that the president is currently very healthy and that he will remain so for the duration of his presidency,” Dr. Ronny Jackson said at the daily White House news briefing during a nearly hourlong question-and-answer period with reporters.

Jackson added that during the physical on Friday at the Walter Reed National Military Medical Center, he performed some cognitive testing at the president's behest and that Trump “did well on it.” He noted the exam was limited to a screening for cognitive impairment and was not part of a larger psychological examination.

Trump, according to Jackson, is 6-foot-3, 239 pounds. The doctor said that he and Trump discussed losing weight and exercising, which he recommended, and that the president expressed “he would like to lose 10 to 15 pounds.”
https://www.politico.com/story/2018/01/16/trump-health-physical-medical-341485

And that’s true! Oh and anyone else remember when Vince McMahon announced that he was going to announce a Trump friendly version of the NFL called the XFL? I think people must have forgot about that, I mean when the league actually launches will anyone really care?

Television ratings for the N.F.L. have fallen 17 percent over the past two seasons. The league is embroiled in a continuing crisis over concussions, and youth participation rates are falling.

All of this suggests a difficult future for the sport, yet the N.F.L.’s most notorious competitor, Vince McMahon’s X.F.L., has a comeback in the works.

McMahon, the chairman and chief executive of World Wrestling Entertainment, announced on Thursday that he would take a second crack at professional football, with play scheduled to start in early 2020.

McMahon first tried to reimagine pro football 17 years ago. The old X.F.L. was a joint venture between the World Wrestling Federation (W.W.E.’s former name) and NBC, which had lost rights to broadcast N.F.L. games.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/01/25/sports/football/vince-mcmahon-xfl.html

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]March & April: Mass Shootings & Gun Nut Apologists
[br] [/font] [br]

Yeah so at the end of February we had the horrifying mass shooting at Parkland High School in Florida, and for those of you who aren’t from America and don’t know how the mass shooting cycle works, we have the mass shooting no matter where it is, there’s usually a month long conversation that follows where we make some completely asinine excuses as to why we should continue to mass produce weapons of mass destruction. While mass shootings are nothing to joke at, we can joke at the mass stupidity of our elected representatives. Now just to set the record straight, we are in no way, shape or form making fun of tragedy. We’re just making fun of the excuses to blame everyone and everything but the gun!

The Texas lieutenant governor, speaking two days after 10 people were killed in a school shooting in his state, said abortion, divorce and violent video games and movies show that 'we have devalued life,' which he pointed to as a cause of school shootings.

Republican Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick told ABC News Chief Anchor George Stephanopoulos on "This Week" Sunday, "We have devalued life, whether it's through abortion, whether it's the breakup of families, through violent movies, and particularly violent video games."

Patrick continued, "Psychologists and psychiatrists will tell you that students are desensitized to violence, may have lost empathy for their victims by watching hours and hours of video violent games.”

He said, “the problem is multifaceted. It's not any one issue. But we, again, we have to look at our culture of violence, just our violent society, our Facebook, our Twitter, the bullying of adults on adults, and children on children. We have to look at ourselves, George, it's not about the guns, it's about us.”
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/guns-part-nation-texas-official-shooting-victims-dad/story?id=55300369

Yes that’s the lieutenant governor of Texas literally saying that the reason that mass shootings happen is because schools have too many exits. But did we really need Killer Mike from Run The Jewels literally shooting his mouth off about guns? I can guarantee that answer is a definite “no”.

One half of Run The Jewels, Killer Mike has taken to social media to clarify controversial points he made in an interview with the National Rifle Association of America.

The interview was released while marches against gun violence took place in US, and saw the rapper discuss his gun ownership stance while debating the marches and National Walkout Day.

“I told my kids on the school walkout, I love you, [but] if you walkout that school, walkout my house,” he said to NRATV.

“We are not a family that jumps on every single thing an ally of ours does because some stuff we just don’t agree with.”

Killer Mike also said he was “very pro-Second Amendment”.

“And before you say ‘What about the children,’ my daughter goes to Savannah State University. There was also a shooting on that campus. Talked to my wife and daughter after that, the decision was we’re gonna go to Savannah, she’s gonna get a gun and train more.”
http://themusic.com.au/news/all/2018/03/26/run-the-jewels%E2%80%99-killer-mike-responds-to-backlash-from-controversial-pro-gun-interview/

Well you could just call it “Run The Jewels Live From Uranus”. Yes, we at the Top 10 are not above making poop jokes! But of course you know politics makes for strange bedfellows and those that survived the shooting went on a rampage of their own targeting the NRA. Of course we were introduced to David Hogg, a 18 year old who is going places and makes gun nutters frothing at the mouth crazy.

National Rifle Association board member and classic rocker Ted Nugent slammed survivors of the Parkland, Florida, school shooting, calling them "liars" and "poor, mushy-brained children."

Nugent made the comments during an interview on "The Joe Pags Show," a nationally syndicated conservative radio program.

"All you have to do now is not only feel sorry for the liars, but you have to go against them and pray to God that the lies can be crushed and the liars can be silenced so that real measures can be put into place to actually save children's lives," Nugent said about the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School students.

"These poor children, I'm afraid to say this and it hurts me to say this, but the evidence is irrefutable, they have no soul," he added.

Read more: https://www.cnn.com/2018/03/31/politics/nra-member-calls-parkland-survivors-liars/index.html

Yes that’s everyone’s favorite draft dodging pants shitter Ted Nugent openly mocking mass shooting victims on national TV. And in case you’re wondering if the GOP couldn’t be anymore cruel and heartless when it comes to this sort of thing, remember when Crisis Actors were a thing? Oh and guess what? That was named “lie of the year” by Politifact!

The conspiracy theories that labeled the Parkland student activists “crisis actors” has been named the Lie of the Year by prominent fact-checking web site PolitiFact.

“In another year of lament about the lack of truth in politics, the attacks against Parkland’s students stand out because of their sheer vitriol,” PolitiFact said in the story announcing the decision, published Tuesday.

The website notes that in the immediate days after the Feb. 14 shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, there was a sense of potential unity, especially after President Donald Trump said that unlike in the past, this time the response wouldn’t be just talk.

“But in the shadows, the internet engine of hoaxes and smears had started,” PolitiFact noted, highlighting the claim that student leader David Hogg and the other students were “crisis actors” and not actually students from the school.
https://www.sun-sentinel.com/local/broward/parkland/florida-school-shooting/fl-ne-politifact-biggest-lie-parkland-20181211-story.html

[font size="8"]May – June
[br] [/font] [br]

Ah, Armageddon days are here again! Of course we go from mass school shooting to seeing what we’re all gonna die in the rapture looks like. And you know that one of the biggest groups of Trump supporters is end times apocalypse worshippers, and you know they just love him, and they’re actively encouraging President T to bring about the apocalypse to placate their own fantasies, because reasons. And hey you know what? A nuclear apocalypse isn’t going to favor you, you will probably die too! But Trump did his best to escalate the situation with an incredibly ill advised move to take the US embassy to Jerusalem, which caused a whole lot of people to die in the process.

The US officially relocated its Embassy to Jerusalem on Monday, formally upending decades of American foreign policy in a move that was met with clashes and protests along the Israeli-Gaza border.

At least 43 Palestinians were killed in Gaza as deadly protests took place ahead of and during the ceremony in Jerusalem — making it the deadliest day there since the 2014 Gaza war.

President Donald Trump did not attend the ceremony in Jerusalem's Arnona neighborhood, but in a video message broadcast at the event he congratulated Israel, saying the opening had been "a long time coming."

"Today, Jerusalem is the seam of Israel's government. It is the home of the Israeli legislature and the Israeli supreme court and Israel's prime minister and president. Israel is a sovereign nation with the right like every other sovereign nation to determine its own capital, yet for many years, we failed to acknowledge the obvious, the plain reality that Israel's capital is Jerusalem," Trump said in the pre-recorded remarks.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/05/14/politics/jerusalem-us-embassy-trump-intl/index.html

Yeah we can imagine the rapture will be kind of like that. But then the summer time was also the time that Melania picked to launch her anti-bullying campaign called “#BeBest”. Anyone remember that? I mean who perfect to pick to launch an anti-bullying campaign than the wife of one of the biggest bullies in the world?

Melania Trump, nearly 16 months into her tenure as first lady, has at last revealed her formal platform: "Be Best." The comprehensive program will focus on three main points -- well-being, fighting opioid abuse and positivity on social media -- and is the culmination of the past several months of Trump's various public events, all of which centered around helping children.

"As a mother and as first lady, it concerns me that in today's fast-paced and ever-connected world, children can be less prepared to express or manage their emotions and oftentimes turn to forms of destructive or addictive behavior such as bullying, drug addiction or even suicide," she said during a Rose Garden event Monday.

"I feel strongly that as adults we can and should be best at educating our children about the importance of a healthy and balanced life," the first lady said.
Trump has in recent weeks experienced a significant surge in support, a new CNN poll revealed Monday, including among women and Democrats.

In a poll conducted by SSRS last week, 57% say they have a favorable impression of Trump, up from 47% in January. This is the biggest number Melania Trump has experienced in any CNN polling, and higher than any favorability rating earned by President Donald Trump in CNN polling history going back to 1999.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/05/07/politics/melania-trump-unveils-platform-be-best/index.html

That’s right – it took 16 months for Melania to finally unveil her plan to end bullying! Of course it’s kind of hard to do that when you’re a bully yourself! Must we forget that Melania, oh and by the way what a fine example she’s setting! And remember when Sean Hannity committed multiple on air felonies by telling anyone involved in the Trump campaign to destroy their phones? So much better than her emails, they tell us!

Fox News host Sean Hannity on his show Wednesday night sarcastically advised witnesses in special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation to "follow Hillary Clinton's lead" and destroy their personal phones before handing them over to prosecutors.

Hannity's comments — he said he was kidding during the same telecast — followed a report by CNBC that Mueller's team had asked witnesses in its probe to turn over their personal phones for examination of encrypted messaging apps like WhatsApp, Dust and Signal.

The Fox host lambasted Mueller's "pitbull" team for the tactic of demanding that witnesses turn over phones and all encrypted apps, along with the messages and emails within them.

Hannity then made a comparison to Clinton, whose use of a private email server when she served as secretary of State prompted an FBI investigation and has been the subject of frequent criticism on his show.
http://thehill.com/homenews/media/391115-hannity-advises-witnesses-in-mueller-probe-smash-their-phones-to-little-itsy

And then speaking of Melania, remember when Trump decided that the border was his own personal play toy? And when he started locking children in cages and separating them from their parents in some truly evil, Hitler-esque shit? Yeah, and then we had Melania’s famous jacket:

A day after first lady Melania Trump stirred controversy by wearing a jacket that read "I really don't care, do u?" on a trip to visit a children's shelter on the U.S.-Mexico border, people are still scratching their heads.

What did it mean? And how did something like this happen?

On his late-night show, comedian Stephen Colbert asked a version of the question reverberating around political Washington: "How many people would get fired for this at a normal White House? One? Five? The entire executive branch? . . . People who were supposedly on her side let her get on a plane with a jacket that said, 'I really don't care, do you?'"

Whether the first lady anticipated - or was warned - that her outerwear would divert attention from what her staff described as a humanitarian mission, her choice to wear it in public seems to be deliberate.

Her small staff has described her as a decisive first lady who values loyalty and privacy.
https://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/politics/ct-melania-trump-jacket-analysis-20180622-story.html

Oh and we can’t end discussion of this summer without mentioning Sarah’s night out at the Red Hen restaurant and the resulting shit show that followed with conservatives telling liberals that we really need to be more civil to each other. Really? We don’t call the cops on black people for sitting at park benches.

Stephanie Wilkinson was at home Friday evening — nearly 200 miles from the White House — when the choice presented itself.

Her phone rang about 8 p.m. It was the chef at the Red Hen, the tiny farm-to-table restaurant that she co-owned just off Main Street in the small city of Lexington, in the western part of Virginia.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders had just walked in and sat down, the chef informed her.

“He said the staff is a little concerned. What should we do?” Wilkinson told The Washington Post. “I said I’d be down to see if it’s true.”

It seemed unlikely to her that President Trump’s press secretary should be dining at a 26-seat restaurant in rural Virginia. But then, it was unlikely that her entire staff would have misidentified Sanders, who had arrived last to a table of eight booked under her husband’s name.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/local/wp/2018/06/23/why-a-small-town-restaurant-owner-asked-sarah-huckabee-sanders-to-leave-and-would-do-it-again/?utm_term=.090174e7e647

Although if you want to talk about civility, you conservative snowflakes, you couldn’t even get the right fucking Red Hen restaurant correctly! Yeah you wound up harassing and sending death threats to Red Hen restaurants all over the country! Civility my ass!!!!

Several restaurants named the Red Hen said they were harassed over the weekend after press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders was asked on Friday to leave an unrelated Lexington, Virginia, eatery of the same name.

Stephanie Wilkinson, who owns the restaurant where Sanders tried to dine, told The Washington Post that she asked the press secretary to leave because several of her staffers are gay and were concerned about serving Sanders, who has defended an administration that has supported anti-LGBTQ policies.

The incident has sparked backlash, and hundreds of people have contacted the restaurant or posted on its social media pages to express their feelings.

Though Sanders’ tweet about the incident specified that the restaurant she had visited is in Lexington, President Donald Trump added to the confusion on Monday when he slammed the Red Hen on Twitter without identifying which Red Hen restaurant he was referring to.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/red-hen-sarah-huckabee-sanders-harrassment_us_5b30f092e4b00295f15f0d82

[font size="8"]July – August
[br] [/font] [br]

You really don’t need to watch Fox News for more than an hour to know what an impact they have on the Trump administration. I mean he watches Fox News so much that you can literally hear the 1-800-EMPIRE commercial jingle in the background on Air Force One:

Yeah that happened! And remember when Trump put Scott Pruitt in charge of the EPA and then he was replaced by a Fox News host? Fox News has basically created a bullshit pipeline that leads them direct to Trump’s White House. Who’s really running the country now?

WASHINGTON -- Scott Pruitt, the administrator of the Environmental Protection Agency who was key to implementing President Trump's conservative agenda but came under intense scrutiny for a series of questionable ethical decisions, resigned Thursday afternoon. Pruitt's deputy at the EPA, Andrew Wheeler, will serve as the agency's acting administrator starting Monday, President Trump said in a tweet.

"I have no doubt that Andy will continue on with our great and lasting EPA agenda," Mr. Trump tweeted. "We have made tremendous progress and the future of the EPA is very bright!"

Pruitt had been the subject of a seemingly endless deluge of stories about his behavior and spending practices. It began earlier this year when it was revealed that Pruitt had rented a room at a favorable rate from a well-connected energy lobbyist. Pruitt's lavish spending on his own security then came under scrutiny, as did his decision to install a $43,00 private phone booth in his office. There were also allegations that Pruitt had created an toxic professional atmosphere at the EPA that penalized his critics.

Pruitt said his decision to leave the EPA was a hard one in his resignation letter to Mr. Trump.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/scott-pruitt-resigns-epa-andrew-wheeler-interim-today-2018-07-05-live-updates/

I think that’s going to happen next. But then of course after the Peter Strzok shit storm Trump got sent to see Putin, like the 5th grade kid getting sent to the principal’s office in Helsinki. We need that GIF of Putin riding on the Ritz cracker.

Following a day of discussions between Presidents Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin in Helsinki, Finland, Mr. Trump left Monday's summit neglecting to hold Putin accountable for Russia's role in interfering in the 2016 presidential election -- saving most of his criticism for America itself.

"I hold both countries responsible. I think that the United States has been foolish. I think that we've all been foolish. We should have had this dialogue a long time ago, a long time, frankly, before I got to office," Mr. Trump said during a joint press conference with Putin.

Offered multiple chances to denounce Russia's actions, Mr. Trump instead placed blame on the FBI and said that he had "confidence" in both parties -- the intelligence community and Russia.

"All I can do is ask the question - my people came to me, Dan Coats came to me and some others, they said they think it's Russia. I have President Putin he just said it's not Russia. I will say this, I don't see any reason why it would be but I really want to see the server but, I have confidence in both parties," Mr. Trump said.
https://www.cbsnews.com/live-news/trump-putin-meeting-us-russia-helsinki-finland-summit-live-updates-today-2018-07-16/

And this might be one of my favorite stories of the entire year so far. Remember when vandals got a hold of one of Betsy DeVos’ $40 million yachts and set it afloat in Lake Huron? Oh yeah let’s not forget that the DeVos family owns a James Bond villain-esque fleet of yachts and private jets. You know, because reasons.

A $40 million yacht belonging to Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos was untied from its mooring at a Lake Huron marina, police said.

The SeaQuest, a 164-foot luxury yacht, registered under a Cayman Islands flag, was set adrift at the Huron Boat Basin, where it was docked.

"Around sunrise the crew woke to find the boat had been untied from the dock and was adrift," according to a vandalism report filed Sunday by the Huron Police Department.

The crew was able to regain control, but not before the ship struck the dock, suffering several scratches and scrapes, the report said.

The captain estimated that the collision caused between $5,000-$10,000 in damages.
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/secretary-education-betsy-devos-40-million-yacht-set/story?id=56840039

And then of course something sad happened – the woman, the myth, the legend that is the Queen of Soul, Aretha Franklin passed away. Of course, Trump loving conservatives couldn’t find it in their, what passes for hearts, to say something about the legend. I mean Trump couldn’t even book an Aretha Franklin impersonator!

As we all have learned, Aretha Franklin wasn’t just the Queen of Soul, she also fought for justice. Ms. Franklin was close to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and sang at his funeral. She offered to post bail for Angela Davis in 1979, saying, “I’m going to see her free if there is any justice in our courts, not because I believe in communism, but because she’s a Black woman and she wants freedom for Black people.” Franklin also sang at three inaugurations: Jimmy Carter, Bill Clinton and Barack Obama. However, there is reportedly one inauguration she refused to lend her voice — Trump’s. And a new report claims he was begging the Queen of Soul.

Franklin “hated” the rise of Trump. Tom Barrack, the chairman of the Presidential Inaugural Committee, was attempting to book Aretha, The Daily Beast reports, writing, ” Trump had long considered the legendary singer a friend, and wanted the offer framed as an opportunity to help bring the country back together after a brutal, bruising presidential election.”

A “source” told The Daily Beast that Franklin said “no amount of money” would persuade her to perform for him at the inauguration. Also, “Another knowledgeable source described her as ‘despising’ everything he stood for, as an avowed Hillary Clinton supporter.”

The Daily Beast said Barrack’s spokesman declined to comment on the story.

Of course this should be no shocker. Unlike Omarosa, Ms. Franklin was able to clearly see who Trump was.
https://newpittsburghcourieronline.com/2018/08/19/trump-was-begging-to-get-aretha-franklin-to-perform-at-his-inauguration-and-her-reported-reaction-was-priceless/

And then Fox News had an epic fail when they posted a picture of Patti LaBelle!

https://twitter.com/BadFoxGraphics/status/1030158341883002881

And then of course there’s Trump’s completely ridiculous plan to create a sixth branch of the government called “Space Force”.

Vice President Pence laid out an ambitious plan Thursday that would begin creating a military command dedicated to space and establish a “Space Force” as the sixth branch of the U.S. military as soon as 2020, the first since the Air Force was formed shortly after World War II.

Pence warned of the advancements that potential adversaries are making and issued what amounted to a call to arms to preserve the military’s dominance in space.

“Just as we’ve done in ages past, the United States will meet the emerging threats on this new battlefield,” he said in a speech at the Pentagon. “The time has come to establish the United States Space Force.”

But the monumental task of standing up a new military department, which would require approval by a Congress that shelved the idea last year, may require significant new spending and a reorganization of the largest bureaucracy in the world. And the idea has already run into fierce opposition inside and outside the Pentagon, particularly from the Air Force, which could lose some of its responsibilities.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/pence-details-plan-for-creation-of-space-force-in-what-would-be-the-sixth-branch-of-the-military/2018/08/09/0b40b8d0-9bdc-11e8-8d5e-c6c594024954_story.html?utm_term=.f723d108096a

Just keep Pence away from the equipment!

It’s like Peter Griffin is in charge!

[font size="8"]September – October
[br] [/font] [br]

In the GOP, sexual harassers and serial perverts tend to attract their own kind. Which is why they elected and continue to support Donald J. Trump. We covered extensively last year the #MeToo movement. And they had to go and nominate this fucking guy to judge the highest law in the land, yes, that guy. Brett Kavanaugh. The guy who gave us boofing, the 4F club and of course his bizarre high school calender. Hey if you still have a calendar from high school, you are not a SCOTUS justice, you’re a hoarder.

As multiple accusers have come forward with allegations of sexual misconduct against Supreme Court Justice nominee Brett Kavanaugh, his defenders are taking predictable steps to defend him. They have tried trotting out conservative talking heads to smear Dr. Christine Blasey Ford, Kavanaugh’s initial accuser, as a “troubled” liar (though she first made the allegations to a therapist in 2012 and has since passed a polygraph test administered by a former FBI agent) and a Democratic political operative. Sen. Orrin Hatch, R-Utah, has called newer allegations by Deborah Ramirez, simply "phony."

Equally predictable has been the defenses related to Kavanaugh’s youth and level of intoxication at the time of the alleged incidents. There seems to be the unfortunate belief among Kavanaugh's defenders that “boys will be boys” and should not be held responsible for their youthful "indiscretions" or crimes.

But most men and boys are not one drink too many away from perpetrating sexual abuse. Anyone who has ever drank alcohol in excess has probably done something they later regretted, but few commit sex crimes. Alcohol doesn’t cause sexual violence; if it did, it should be illegal. Rather, alcohol is often used by predators as a tool against victims and convenient excuse for their actions.
https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/defenses-brett-kavanaugh-s-alleged-sexual-misconduct-expose-double-standards-ncna912691

Oh please, if you think “boys will be boys”, you probably shouldn’t be parents of boys, or parents of girls for that matter. This whole thing just made me angry, the only reason they nominated him was to “own the libs”. But you know what? SCOTUS justices have to side with the constitution, assholes! Oh and if you want to know the state of this country, just look at how we treat sexual harassment victims, like our idiot president did!

President Donald Trump for the first time directly mocked Christine Blasey Ford's testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee by casting doubt on her testimony during a campaign rally.

Before the crowd Tuesday night in Southaven, Mississippi, Trump imitated Ford during her testimony, mocking her for not knowing the answers to questions such as how she had gotten to the high school party where she says Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh sexually assaulted her.

"I had one beer. Well, do you think it was -- nope, it was one beer," Trump said, mimicking Ford's testimony last week to the Senate Judiciary Committee.

"How did you get home? I don't remember. How'd you get there? I don't remember. Where is the place? I don't remember. How many years ago was it? I don't know."

Trump's comments were met with laughter and applause from the crowd.
"I don't know. I don't know," the President continued. "What neighborhood was it in? I don't know. Where's the house? I don't know. Upstairs, downstairs -- where was it? I don't know -- but I had one beer. That's the only thing I remember."
https://www.cnn.com/2018/10/02/politics/trump-mocks-christine-blasey-ford-kavanaugh-supreme-court/index.html

Yeah that’s kind of how I feel about that one. But we don’t really need to relive that whole bullshit argument, so let’s skip ahead to fun things! Like when Melania went to Africa to promote her “#BeBest” campaign and really showed the kind of shining example she is to promote an anti-bullying campaign!

First lady Melania Trump said in an interview that aired Thursday that she is the most bullied person in the world, which has led her to create her anti-bullying "Be Best" initiative, before softening her comments slightly to say she is one of the most bullied.

"I could say I'm the most bullied person on the world," Trump told ABC News in an interview during her first major solo trip to Africa last week when asked what personally made her want to tackle the issue of cyberbullying.

"You're really the most bullied person in the world?" ABC News' Tom Llamas asked during the exchange.
"One of them, if you really see what people saying about me," Trump said.

Asked how bullying could affect children, including her son Barron, Trump said that is why her initiative is focused on social media and online behavior.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/10/11/politics/melania-trump-be-best-initiative-bullying/index.html

Womp womp! Oh and then we had one of the absolutely craziest incidents of the year happened that pretty much made us forget about Brett Kavanaugh and boofing. Yes, the MAGABomber. The guy who Bill Maher called “peak Florida” might be one of the dumbest fucking criminals alive. I mean this story was completely insane.

A man arrested on suspicion of being the MAGA bomber has been named as Native American Trump supporter Cesar Sayoc, 56. Sayoc, of Fort Lauderdale, is belived to have been arrested in Plantation, a suburb of Miami, Florida, Friday on suspicion of sending 12 pipe bombs to top Democrats and high-profile figures critical of Donald Trump. Online records show Sayoc has owned companies called Native American Catering & Vending, as well as Proud Native America One Low Price Drycleaning.

Bodybuilder Sayoc is said to have been traced by DNA and phone records, and was flagged as a suspect after making previous terror threats to judges. Meanwhile, photos have emerged of a van linked to Sayoc covered in pro-Trump and anti-Hillary Clinton stickers.

Read more: https://metro.co.uk/2018/10/26/police-seize-van-covered-in-donald-trump-stickers-after-arresting-suspected-maga-bomber-56-8078782/?ito=cbshare

Can we show the van?

I think that van might be held up by the stickers! Which of course the right used to refer to their favorite conspiracy, the false flag. I mean if you listen to these morons, everything is a false flag!

Just hours after the news broke this week that explosive devices had been sent to Bill and Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama and other prominent Democrats, a conspiracy theory began to take shape in certain corners of conservative media.

The bombs, this theory went, were not actually part of a plot to harm Democrats, but were a “false flag” operation concocted by leftists in order to paint conservatives as violent radicals ahead of the elections next month.

“These ‘Suspicious Package’ stories are false flags, carefully planned for the midterms,” tweeted Jacob Wohl, a pro-Trump internet troll who writes for Gateway Pundit, a right-wing news site.

By nightfall, as more explosives were discovered addressed to Representative Maxine Waters, a California Democrat, and Eric H. Holder Jr., an attorney general under Mr. Obama, the fact-free explanation had gelled: The bombs were props, planted by Democratic operatives and amplified by a biased liberal media. A woman arrived at a debate between the two candidates for Florida governor, Ron DeSantis and Andrew Gillum, with a sign that read “Democrats Fake News Fake Bombs.” Lou Dobbs, the Fox Business host and confidant of President Trump, echoed that line in a tweet that he later deleted.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/25/business/false-flag-theory-bombs-conservative-media.html

[font size="8"]November – December
[br] [/font] [br]

We are almost done with our year end recap everybody! Yeah whew! Come on, I just want to see 30 Seconds To Mars, that’s what this is all about, right? I mean I can see Jared and the guys hanging out backstage! You just have to sit through a little more of my bullshit and then we can call it a year and enjoy the show! But I love this that the republicans just got their asses handed to them in the midterm election. Well we didn’t get the senate but we did take back the house! And Putin’s favorite Congressman got fired!

Dana Rohrabacher, a Republican known for his unapologetic pro-Russia stance, is projected to lose against Democrat Harley Rouda in California's 48th congressional district race.

As a member of the House Foreign Affairs Committee, Rohrabacher has advocated for a better relationship with Russian President Vladimir. He has voted with President Trump nearly 84 percent of the time, according to nonpartisan analysis from FiveThirtyEight. He also has been known to back Trump's stance on immigration.

Rouda, a businessman and lawyer promising to protect health care coverage and reduce gun violence, appeared to take the win Wednesday morning after midnight data showed a near tie between the two candidates. Rouda held over 91,000 votes and Rohrabacher had 89,068.

Democrats won the majority in the House of Representatives as midterm election results finalized. This ends unified Republican rule of Washington and opens the possibility that Trump could be investigated when they take power in January. They could demand Trump’s tax returns, subpoena his Cabinet members and investigate alleged corruption across the executive branch.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/elections/2018/11/07/election-results-2018-dana-rohrabacher-harvey-rouda/1917374002/

And then one of my favorite stories of the year has to be the story of Surefire Intelligence. Yes there were two guys who were rabid Trump fans and complete douchebags – 20 year old stock broker wunderkind Jacob Wohl – who was actually banned from the practice due to shady dealings (what a shocker, I know!

), and his business partner Jack Berkman. They tried to use #MeToo as a weapon to take down Robert Mueller, and well, it backfired spectacularly.

Jacob Wohl’s introduction to Washington politics and reporting in the real world—as opposed to the Twitter universe—went sideways on Thursday during a press conference that Wohl attended with conspiracy theorist and lobbyist Jack Burkman.

The pair held their show in a Holiday Inn just across the Potomac River from Washington, D.C. The premise of this press conference was to “present a credible witness” who would accuse Robert Mueller of sexual assault. But any credibility Burkman and Wohl had hoped for was gone before they ever walked into the Rosslyn-area hotel in Arlington, Virginia.

They were scooped on their own story by the Atlantic when the outlet reported that Burkman was behind a scheme to pay women to falsify allegations against Mueller. We even knew the dollar amount that Burkman was offering— $20,000.

Wohl was implicated when it was revealed that he was behind the company, Surefire Intelligence, that had published the official-looking documents outlining the allegations. Surefire’s LinkedIn pages also featured photos of stock models. The profile for an employee in Tel Aviv used a photo of actor Christoph Waltz. The phone numbers listed on Surefire’s website were registered to Wohl’s mother’s name.
https://www.dailydot.com/layer8/jacob-wohl-surefire-intelligence-press-conference/

Thank you Master Yoda! And then we had a huge shakeup in the Trump administration as Tribute Sessions left the wild insanity of the Trump administration and he also had a great sendoff. But yeah the Trump administration has basically become a revolving door and we can expect more Trumper Games stories in the near future! Although I don’t really want to relieve the horror at the border, I do want to show how the Proud Boys imploded!

In a video posted to YouTube on Wednesday, Proud Boys founder Gavin McInnes publicly claimed to have quit the far-right group.

The move came two days after the Guardian exclusively revealed that the FBI had categorized the Proud Boys as “an extremist group with ties to white nationalism”, in a briefing to Washington state law enforcement.

In a sometimes rambling video, McInnes referenced the Guardian story and the prosecution of seven group members over a street brawl in New York city in October, as he offered reasons for resigning from the group.

“As of today … I am officially disassociating myself from the Proud Boys,” he began.

Referencing the New York group as the “NYC Nine”, McInnes said: “I am told by my legal team and law enforcement that this gesture could help alleviate their sentencing.”
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/nov/22/proud-boys-founder-gavin-mcinnes-quits-far-right-group

And then of course on January 3rd when the new Congress gets to work, I can’t wait to see what is going to happen to Michael Cohen and Paul Manafort. Of course you know Trump only hires “the best people” so what happens when the best people do the best squealing? Well we will find out!

The special counsel Robert Mueller's office has told defense lawyers in recent weeks that it is "tying up loose ends" in the investigation into Russia's interference in the 2016 election and whether members of President Donald Trump's campaign colluded with Moscow, Yahoo News reported Monday.

The news is not entirely unexpected. Last month, CNN reported that the special counsel had begun drafting his final report in the Russia investigation.

And this week, prosecutors are set to file several court documents that could reveal major new details about three key players in the Russia investigation: the former national security adviser Michael Flynn, the former Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort, and the former Trump lawyer Michael Cohen.

All three men have pleaded guilty and have been cooperating with prosecutors.
https://www.businessinsider.com/mueller-sentencing-memos-manafort-cohen-flynn-2018-12

?itemid=8555658

By the way if you really want to see Trump’s presidency in action just look at him boarding Air Force One!

And that’s our 2018 year in review everybody!

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font] [br]

Yes it’s the segment where we in the comedy profession explain the concept of humor to people who just quite don’t get it. And you know who doesn’t get humor? The guy who we currently call president, Donald J. Trump. Trump has a hate-hate relationship with everyone’s favorite sketch comedy series Saturday Night Live, and you know he’s got a fourth monitor 10 inches from his bed so he can hate-watch the show. And boy that sketch on Saturday Night Live must have really left a mark. If you haven’t seen that sketch go back to the beginning of this edition and watch it again. Because if there’s one thing that really pisses off Donald J. Trump, it’s when he gets trolled. And this sketch trolled him hard, and it is really getting under his skin.

Have you noticed that Saturday Night Live cracks a lot of jokes at Donald Trump’s expense? The president has, several times—decrying Alec Baldwin’s goonish impersonation of him on multiple occasions and, in September, calling the venerated sketch show “a political ad for the Dems.” But on Sunday, as if awakening from an amnesiac slumber, the president became aware of the phenomenon once more. And wouldn’t you know it, he is not amused.

S.N.L. took its last shot at the president for the year in its midseason finale on Saturday, with a spoof on It’s a Wonderful Life in which Baldwin’s bumbling Trump found out what the world would be like, had he never been elected. (Spoiler alert: everyone, including the president himself, would have been better off.) On Sunday, after a weekend of bashing the press and calling attention to any matter of intrigue that was not his former attorney going to prison for three years, the president fired an angry tweet NBC’s way like clockwork.

“A REAL scandal is the one sided coverage, hour by hour, of networks like NBC & Democrat spin machines like Saturday Night Live,” the president wrote. “It is all nothing less than unfair news coverage and Dem commercials. Should be tested in courts, can’t be legal? Only defame & belittle! Collusion?”

The president has fumed over S.N.L.‘s alleged one-sidedness before; back in 2016, soon after his electoral victory, he exploded over an episode of the show before asking, “Equal time for us?” As Baldwin pointed out at the time, that rule only applies to candidates. And Trump also seemed to conveniently forget that he hosted the show himself back in 2015 when he was on the campaign trail—a move that inspired no shortage of outrage on the left. Still, given this administration’s oft-demonstrated disinterest in facts, it’s hard to imagine what else any of us should have expected.
https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2018/12/donald-trump-snl-unfair-should-be-tested-in-courts

To which we say – “good luck with that!”. I mean come on it’s a fucking comedy show, if they’re not mocking your ridiculous behavior 24 hours a day, they’re doing it wrong! Seriously when SNL comes back after the break, they should just mock this mercilessly. And here’s the thing, if Trump thinks SNL is bad, he probably shouldn’t turn on the TV when he goes to Europe!

It’s time for Christmas gifts in Europe, and comedy sketch writers here have rarely considered themselves to be so fortunate. As the continent’s very own Brexit drama is turning into a dark comedy, President Trump is a gift that keeps on giving to satirical shows.

Europe’s star comedians are doing their best to return the favor. Last week, Germany’s top-rated “Heute Show” satirical broadcast awarded Trump its so-called Goldener Vollpfosten (Golden Idiot) award for the fourth-consecutive time — a keenly anticipated decision by the public broadcaster that made its way into the nation’s more serious news outlets. Trump shares this year’s award with Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, among others.

Meanwhile, in Brexit-distraught Britain, viewers appeared relieved that things may still look messier in the White House than on 10 Downing Street and picked a Trump joke as their annual favorite. Some 2,000 Brits followed a call for action by British comedy channel Gold and picked the following line as 2018?s most hilarious one: “What does Donald Trump do after he pulls a cracker? Pays her off.” Pulling a cracker, according to Urban Dictionary, is a British “phrase used during the festive season to describe going out with a view to hooking up with an attractive person” — a not-too-subtle reference to the hush money payments by Trump’s former lawyer Michael Cohen.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2018/12/17/if-trump-doesnt-like-snls-sketches-about-him-he-really-shouldnt-turn-european-tv/?noredirect=on&utm_term=.75f6a50fd4ef

You really know things are fucked up when the Germans get humor and you don’t! NEIN!!! My favorite thing too is that conservatives were whining big time about the fact that Trump is being called an idiot in Google searches, and I think the Germans are on to something here! And here’s the thing, Mr. Trump – we get it! You’re a TV guy! But you don’t have to find literally every mention of your name in the media. You know who does that? Weird Al. And least Weird Al is funny about it, whereas we know you hate-watch SNL. I mean what do you have like a Google alert for every time your name is mentioned in a late night program?

It looks like Donald Trump was not impressed with the way Saturday Night Live lampooned his administration (again) this week.

This week's cold open imagined what Washington might be like right about now if Trump had not won the presidency in 2016, with Alec Baldwin returning to deliver his signature mouth-squinch as the POTUS in the It's a Wonderful Life-themed black-and-white short guided by Kenan Thompson's Clarence the Angel.

The segment features Sarah Huckabee-Sanders (Aidy Bryant) as a PR rep to a slew of other controversial companies, Kellyanne Conway (Kate McKinnon) feeling pretty radiant about the lack of lies in her life, Eric Trump (Alex Moffat) having earned a few new IQ points, Melania Trump (Cecily Strong) as a real estate mogul in her own right, Michael Cohen (Ben Stiller) as a much peppier attorney-slash-fixer who's free to proceed on that Trump Tower Moscow project, Mike Pence (Beck Bennett) enjoying a post-political life as a spirited DJ. After seeing their happiness on parade, NotTrump concludes, "Wow, so everyone is better off without me being president."

The night's host, Matt Damon, also reprised his role as Brett Kavanaugh — only this time, his love of beer and childhood friends named "Squi" is endearing — and, last but not least, Robert De Niro arrived again as Robert Mueller, who was happy to have so much more time to spend with his grandson in retirement.
https://www.tvguide.com/news/donald-trump-reacts-to-saturday-night-live/

Yeah probably! And you know you’re thin skinned when John Legend’s wife Chrissy Tegen can shut you down with just 3 words. Can we show that tweet?

https://twitter.com/chrissyteigen/status/1074326877261578240

Someone call the burn ward because you just got burned! I mean for the party that loves to rail on snowflakes, they sure are a bunch of snowflakes aren’t they? Really no one is more thin skinned than the white Christian conservative. But the day you can have my late night sketch comedy is the day you pry it from my cold dead hands, OK?

CNN’s Alisyn Camerota is serious about her political comedy.

After Saturday Night Live opened its final show of 2018 this weekend with an It’s a Wonderful Life parody that imagined a world in which Donald Trump was never elected president, the actual president of the United States tweeted, “A REAL scandal is the one sided coverage, hour by hour, of networks like NBC & Democrat spin machines like Saturday Night Live.”

“It is all nothing less than unfair news coverage and Dem commercials,” Trump added. “Should be tested in courts, can’t be legal? Only defame & belittle! Collusion?”

As her co-anchor John Berman read that “official statement” aloud to New Day viewers on Monday morning, Camerota interrupted to him to point out that SNL is “actually not news,” it’s a “comedy show.”
https://www.thedailybeast.com/cnn-goes-off-on-trump-for-snl-tweet-do-not-mess-with-our-comedy

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
[br] [/font] [br]

Gather around, my fair brothers and sisters, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate! For the Holy Church of the Top 10 has convened and it’s our weekly duty to remind you why the holiest among us are also the most full of:

My fair congregation! This is the last week of the year for us, we are going to take the holy high holidays off and come back next year rested and refreshed and ready to take on all the batshit being flung at us by our brothers and sisters on the right! But… before we go, we are going to look back on the year that was because they were up to their usual bag of tricks. Of course you know there has been an ongoing war between those in the spiritual world who support the unholy, ungodly Dark One – whose name shall not be mentioned in my church – and those that do! They even made a movie about it!

Mark Taylor is sure he knows why Donald Trump became president.

Forget Hillary hatred, white anger, Russian interference or voter turnout. Trump’s victory was God’s will, said Taylor. Taylor said he knows this because God told him so.

In 2011, while watching an interview with Trump on TV, Taylor says he heard a voice saying, “The Spirit of God says I’ve chosen this man, Donald Trump, for such a time as this.”

And the Almighty is just getting started, said Taylor, a former firefighter who has published 23 “prophetic words,” many about Trump’s presidency.

The presidential prediction is detailed in “The Trump Prophecy,” a new film produced with the help of faculty and students at Liberty University — some of whom later rejected its message — that will be shown in some 1,200 theaters on Oct. 2 and 4.
https://www.sltrib.com/religion/2018/09/25/new-trump-prophecy-film/

I mean really, I love that the Christian right has a guy who thinks he’s a firefighter, a guy who thinks he’s a coach, and a guy who thinks he’s a sea captain. Really, they’re only a Native American chief short of the Village People! But you know this is also the year that the uber religious opened their own theme park!

Northern Kentucky's Noah's Ark replica attracted one million visitors during its second year of operation, officials said.

Answers in Genesis (AIG), which owns the Ark Encounter and the Creation Museum, reported a 20 percent jump in attendance year over year for the ark.

The structure, literally of Biblical proportions, opened to the public in July 2016 and drew about drew over 1 million visitors to Williamstown during its first year of operation as well. Answers in Genesis initially projected 1.2 million would attend.

By most accounts, the ark draws more visitors than its sister attraction. AIG does not release yearly attendance numbers for the Creation Museum, according to spokeswoman Melany Ethridge, however, organization leaders said in 2016 they were hoping the museum would draw 600,000 that year.

New additions are planned for the Ark Encounter grounds including the Answers Center, more zoo space, restaurants and a children's play area. The center will house a 2,500-seat auditorium and a 36,000-square foot basement with classrooms.
https://www.cincinnati.com/story/news/2018/07/05/ark-encounter-reports-1-million-visitors-2nd-year/759704002/

Yes so there is a giant ark and it’s quite possibly the worst theme park ever. But then of course I love delving into the world of conspiracy theories and there were quite a lot of them in this administration from the get go, but then they combine their street preaching and reckless conspiracy theories into a fight club known as Patriot Prayer. I mean that just sounds horrible doesn’t it?

Fresh off another violent street brawl in Portland, Patriot Prayer is planning a pair of college campus visits to talk about guns -- but now is turning its attention to its home turf of Clark County.

Members of the right-wing group plan to be at Clark College on Oct. 22 and Washington State University Vancouver the next day to protest a state ballot initiative that would raise the minimum age of semi-automatic rifle purchasers to 21 from 18.

Joey Gibson, a Vancouver resident and Patriot Prayer's leader, said about three dozen supporters will hand out fliers encouraging students to oppose Initiative 1639, which would also impose a 10-day waiting period for semi-automatic purchases and require buyers to take firearms training.

Several campus groups at WSU Vancouver this week published an open letter to urge students and faculty not to attend class during Patriot Prayer's visit, citing the group's propensity for physical confrontations and its history of drawing white nationalists and other controversial participants to its events, The Columbian reported.

Clark College spokeswoman Hannah Erickson told the paper the school also had concerns about the group coming to its campus, which Gibson dismissed.

"They're not going to stop us talking to students. It's not going to happen," he told The Columbian, adding that Initiative 1639 was "fascist."
https://www.oregonlive.com/clark-county/index.ssf/2018/10/patriot_prayer_fresh_off_wild.html

Yes, my constituents! Nothing says JAYSUS like a pep talk from a fight club about guns! I mean really who is he kidding? I’ve read our good book cover to cover and I don’t remember any passage where JAYSUS told his disciples that it is better to shoot first and ask questions later! And speaking of shooting first and asking questions later, is it any wonder that they love the apocalypse?

Intercessors for America, the pro-Trump group that has been mobilizing its prayer warriors to help elect “godly” candidates in the 2018 midterms, has bumped up the frequency of its monthly prayer calls and will be holding them every week between now and the election. Rep. Jody Hice of Georgia was the featured guest on last Friday’s call.

IFA’s Dave Kubal described this year’s elections as the most important ever, and called Hice “one of my favorite Congressmen.” Hice returned the favor, saying that intercessory prayer activists are “the most important group in America right now.” He said that the “evidence of intercession is abundant in ways we cannot even fathom,” citing as examples the election of Trump and his ability to name Supreme Court justices, and the prayer meetings and Bible studies happening “all over the place” in Washington and at the U.N. and the Pentagon.

Hice warned that if Democrats take the House, they would immediately “begin pursuing impeachment, be it against President Trump or Chief Justice Kavanaugh [sic].” Under Democratic control, he said, taxes would rise, the military would “suffer,” there would be more sanctuary cities and less border protection, and religious freedom would be threatened.

Asked about pundits giving Democrats a 75 percent chance of winning a House majority, Hice noted that the same pundits had given Hillary Clinton a greater than 90 percent chance of winning the presidency in 2016. Hice took comfort in the fact that Trump moved the U.S. embassy in Israel to Jerusalem because God said that He would bless those who bless Israel.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/rep-jody-hice-midterms-are-spiritual-battle-johnson-amendment-must-be-repealed-this-year/

Because impeaching the DARK ONE will lead directly to the apocalypse! You know I’ve seen this sort of movie before. It starts with impeachment and ends with nuclear hellfire! Yes because that’s what we need living under an unstable, unhinged lunatic with easy access to nuclear weapons – reason for him to use them! Can I get an amen???? But is it any wonder why supports of the Dark One – whose name shall not be spoken in my church - are losing if this is the kind of bullshit that we have to put up with? And yes, it is OK to swear in my church!

Last night, right-wing “journalist” and Trump–worshiping conspiracy theorist Liz Crokin posted a get-out-the-vote video on YouTube in which she asserted that a vote cast for any Democratic candidate in the midterm elections is a vote in support of the rape, torture, and murder of children.

“Tomorrow’s election boils down to whether or not you support the rape, torture, trafficking, and murdering of children, period,” she said. “Yes, it literally is that black and white. It is literally that simple.”

“The Democratic Party is the party of child sex trafficking,” Crokin continued. “Their policies—sanctuary cities, the border wall, the caravan crisis, the refugee crisis—these are all covers, people, to traffic children. Period! Tomorrow boils down to whether you support the trafficking of children or not. Period! I cannot stress this enough.”

“The members of Congress who are Democrats are tied into child sex trafficking in one way, shape, or form,” she added. “Whether they are directly trafficking kids themselves and raping kids and torturing kids themselves, or whether they are profiting off of it, or if they’re blackmailed, it doesn’t matter. That party’s polices encourages and fosters and enables child sex trafficking and many of the Demon-crats are directly running child sex trafficking rings, period.”

“If you are finding this video and seeing this video right now and you are undecided, there is a reason for that,” Crokin said. “God is calling you to the polls. And let me tell you, if you are not okay with children being raped, tortured, and trafficked, then you need to vote red all the way down the line. Period!”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/liz-crokin-voting-democrat-is-a-vote-for-the-rape-torture-and-murder-of-children/

Sadly we’re going to have to put up with more of that shit next year, but just be remembered that this is how the Dark One lost! Can I get an amen??? There you go, mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this year for:

[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
[br] [/font] [br]

Hit it!

Of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. We’re almost at the end of the year and it’s time to look back on all the incredibly stupid people that we’ve found over the last year that was 2018. So where do we start? Well I want to start with what might be the dumbest story of the decade. Shit, maybe one of the dumbest stories of the century. Yeah there’s nothing at all that will ever top this one. So what story is it? Yup it’s the border patrol agent who was holding a gender reveal party and turned a hundred acres of brush into one of the largest fires in Arizona history!

When Dennis Dickey, a United States Border Patrol agent from Arizona, fired at a target filled with colorful powder, he was expecting to learn the gender of his future child, his lawyer said.

Instead, the target erupted and sparked a fire that consumed more than 45,000 acres of land and resulted in more than $8 million in damages, the United States attorney’s office for Arizona said.

On Friday, Mr. Dickey pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor violation of United States Forest Service regulations for igniting what became known as the Sawmill Fire, which started on April 23, 2017, and had nearly 800 firefighters battling it for about a week.

The fire began while Mr. Dickey was off duty near Green Valley, Ariz., about 26 miles south of Tucson, to celebrate his wife’s pregnancy, his lawyer, Sean Chapman, told The Arizona Daily Star.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/01/us/gender-reveal-arizona-fire.html

You know it’s really going to be hard to pick the dumbest stories of the year because there were a lot of very strong contenders. Well one of my favorites was out of New Hampshire where a guy took the “judgement free zone” policy of gym chain Planet Fitness just a little too literally.

A Haverhill man who stripped naked and did yoga poses in a crowded Planet Fitness over the weekend learned the limits of the gym chain’s “judgement-free” philosophy.

Eric Stagno, 34, was arrested at the Planet Fitness in Plaistow, N.H., shortly after 1:30 p.m. on Sunday, according to police Captain Brett Morgan.

“When officers arrived, they found him there, completely nude: on his knees in a yoga-type position,” Morgan said. “He walked into the gym, stripped down at the door, then proceeded to walk back and forth a couple of times before settling in on the yoga mats.”

The gym was fairly crowded at the time, but Stagno kept to himself, Morgan said. He checked himself out in the mirror and made his way over to the yoga mats, seemingly unaware that those around him were perturbed.
https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2018/07/23/haverhill-man-strips-naked-crowded-planet-fitness/eEPggW9BW8zE5EI1pzexbL/story.html?refresh=true&s_campaign=bostonglobe%3Asocialflow%3Atwitter

Yup, that happened! Don’t judge me!!!! Don’t judge me!!!! It’s a judgement free zone!!! And of course we can’t talk about stupid people without mentioning America’s most penis shaped state – Florida, a lot of stupid and batshit crazy out of that state. For instance one of my favorite stories this year was the guy who got who took the phrase “get off my lawn” just a little too literally:

You know a neighbors’ spat is no longer neighborly when chainsaws get involved.

That’s what happened in Pasco County when two men got into a dispute over the shrubs between their houses last week. It ended with one of them needing surgery to repair severed tendons in his hand, WFLA reported.

The man with the chainsaw was Gregory Landaker, 70, of Land O’ Lakes, who was cutting shrubs on the property line he shares with Jeffrey Zlocki.

When Zlocki noticed what was going on, he went out and hugged “his bushes,” according to the sheriff’s office report.

That apparently didn’t deter Landaker, who continued sawing away. The chainsaw struck Zlocki in his left hand, and he was taken to Tampa General Hospital.

It wasn’t quite the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but blood definitely flowed.
https://www.orlandosentinel.com/opinion/audience/david-whitley/os-ae-florida-man-chainsaw-attack-david-whitley-0911-story.html#

And then of course I love stupid criminal stories and the stupider the better. One of my favorite stupid criminal stories this year was the story of the cheerleader who was nominated for homecoming queen and then got busted for trying to bribe potential voters with pot brownies!

A 17-year-old cheerleader at a Michigan high school is accused of giving pot brownies to fellow students in hopes they'd vote for her as homecoming queen.

The student, now the subject of a criminal investigation, allegedly brought 12 marijuana-laced brownies to Hartford High School on September 26, authorities say.

Hartford patrolman Michael Prince, who is investigating the incident, told WWMT-TV that some of the brownies, nine of which are unaccounted for, were given to football players in "goody bags" as a way to campaign for homecoming queen.

In a letter sent home to parents, Hartford Public Schools said they were contacted by state police following an anonymous tip that students were eating pot brownies at the school. The school confirmed the report and involved students "are being dealt with" according to district policies and student handbooks, superintendent Andrew Hubbard said in a statement.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2018/10/04/student-trades-pot-brownies-homecoming-queen-votes-police/1520263002/

And then finally this year for people are dumb – another one of my favorite stories, this time out of Fresno – you know the hometown of one of Putin’s favorite Congressmen – Devin Nunes! You know here’s the thing – we all hate spiders. But you know what you don’t do with them? Kill them with a blow torch!!

A house caught on fire after a man tried to kill spiders and get rid of webs, according to a fire department.

Fresno firefighters said the man was house sitting for his parents and used a blowtorch against black widows, KFSN-TV reported.

Fire department spokesman Capt. Robert Castillo said the man used the open flame outdoors, starting at a brick veneer section of the approximately 4,000-square-foot home. He eventually noticed smoke coming from the attic.

Fire trucks inundated a street by the home Tuesday night. About 27 firefighters responded.

It caused an estimated $10,000 in damage.
https://www.ketv.com/article/house-catches-on-fire-after-man-sought-to-kill-spiders-fire-department-says/24187383?utm_campaign=KETV&utm_content=5bd1cca004d3010b17a766f5&utm_medium=twitter&utm_source=trueAnthem:+New+Content

That’s it this year for:

[font size="8"]Deep State Diaries Episode 24: The Internal Revenue Service
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time for episode 24 of Deep State Diaries. Yes we’re touring the 24 branches and services that make up the United States government. Everything from the FBI to the IRS to the Pentagon to the CIA to the DPW to the DVA to parks and recreation and all branches and services in between. Of course if you’re here you probably already know more about our government and how it works than your average Fox News loving Trump supporter does. So that’s what this segment is going to address. We are going to do a deep dive into all that makes the United States the United States. Because we here at the Top 10 love to educate as well as entertain. Because we care.

[font size="6"]The Internal Revenue Service[/font]

Well there’s two things that are inevitable – death and taxes. Yes, for our last edition of this year we have decided that we are going to tackle one of this country’s most hated institutions. The Internal Revenue Service. And you might be thinking that facing an actual IRS auditor is the absolute worst thing in the world. But you know what? It really isn’t, after all, they are just here to help, like the Baymax robot in Big Hero 6. So what does the IRS do on an actual day to day basis? Well they mainly assist with checks, balances, and fraud. Of which there currently is a *LOT* of fraud. And things like, well, your paycheck are on the line. Especially if this happens!

The Internal Revenue Service (IRS) is warning about an uptick in phishing emails involving payroll direct deposit, wire transfer, and W-2 scams. The emails, which are primarily targeted to businesses, are not limited to a particular industry or employer though the IRS has received reports that tax preparers are among those affected.

Here’s how they typically work. The emails generally impersonate a real company employee, often an executive, and are sent to payroll or human resources (HR) personnel. The email asks the payroll or HR department to change the employee’s deposit for payroll purposes and provides a new bank account and routing number which, of course, leads to a bogus account operated by the scammer. By the time the deception has been discovered, the employee has lost one or two payroll deposits.

In another version, the emails impersonate a company executive and are directed to the company employee responsible for wire transfers. The email requests that a wire transfer be made to a bank account for company purposes, but is actually controlled by the scammer.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/kellyphillipserb/2018/12/17/irs-warns-about-fake-payroll-direct-deposit-wire-transfer-and-w-2-scam-emails/#5e5dde9c18a4

Yeah so the next time that you think you might be ripped off or a fraudster goes after your paycheck, thank the IRS! But people love to hate on the IRS, just ask the “Church” of Scientology! But you know too, what does the IRS think about a burgeoning industry that could soon be taxed and regulated? Yes, that industry!

The federal tax treatment of state-legal marijuana businesses makes no sense. As I used to tell staff who made "no sense" comments - That's not a requirement. That is the basis of Reilly's First Law of Tax Planning - It is what it is. Deal with it.

The problem is created by Code Section 280E

No deduction or credit shall be allowed for any amount paid or incurred during the taxable year in carrying on any trade or business if such trade or business (or the activities which comprise such trade or business) consists of trafficking in controlled substances (within the meaning of schedule I and II of the Controlled Substances Act) which is prohibited by Federal law or the law of any State in which such trade or business is conducted

Here is the schedule and you can see Marihuana and Marihuana Extract on Page 10. (Apparently spelling it with an "h" rather than a "j" was a thing back in the Reefer Madness days.)
https://www.forbes.com/sites/peterjreilly/2018/12/17/irs-and-marihuana-reefer-madness-tax-court-harborside-decision/#6a81288a1610

I think the funniest thing about that clip is Krusty having to read that clip. But you know the IRS has rules for everything. But yeah, it’s funny how Trumpers are going insane about people crossing the border illegally, but they have absolutely no problems cheating on their taxes! So what happens when you get caught?

A Rockford man was indicted Tuesday by a federal grand jury on charges of federal tax fraud and interfering with internal revenue laws.

Michael Mendoza, 31, faces sixteen counts of making false claims on Internal Revenue Service.

Mendoza allegedly claimed tax refunds worth $356,844 that he was not entitled to between 2014 and 2016. According to the indictment, he allegedly made false representations on wages, income tax amounts, and withholding amounts.

Per the indictment, Mendoza electronically filed federal income tax returns for himself and in the names of other persons, causing refunds claimed to be deposited into bank accounts he owned and controlled.

Mendoza faces up to five years in prison and a $250,000 fine for each charge of a false IRS claim. He faces an additional three years in prison for attempting to interfere with the IRS administration.
https://www.wifr.com/content/news/Rockford-man-indicted-for-tax-fraud-interfering-with-IRS-503068931.html

Yeah so if you do get audited don’t be like Peter. And by the way, you should be thanking the IRS for protecting you from some hardcore scamming, not trying to destroy them. And yes if it can happen to me, it can happen to you or to anyone.

This Christmas season, the agency is speaking out about the scam and warning people not to fall victim.

IRS Spokesperson Clay Sanford said, "It happens to someone, probably once a week, somewhere." Sanford adds that many scammers pretending to be IRS employees make up fake badge numbers and even use threatening language. "They may already know something about you they may have done their homework ... we don't ask for bank account information we certainly won't threaten to put you in jail," he said.

Some of the callers even demand you pay them with gift cards. Sanford said, "We've seen scams wanting them to pay with iTunes gift cards. People have actually done this." If this happens to you, the IRS said hang up the phone and report it to the Inspector General at www.tigta.gov.

Sanford adds, it is highly unlikely you'll ever actually receive a call from the IRS. "It's not out of the realm of possibility to get a call from the IRS, we generally don't call people and ask for things like social security numbers," he said. Sanford says the main method of communication used by the IRS is the U.S. Postal Service. "It would probably be only when several mailed notices have gone ignored, that you might get an actual phone call from the IRS," he said.
https://www.myarklamiss.com/news/local-news/irs-don-t-fall-victim-to-scammers/1663511714

[font size="6"]Score Card [/font]

Overall importance: A
How Things Are Going: C-
Likely hood To Survive: C+

Overall: B-

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

There is no next week, but when we come back on January 9th we’re going to take a look at the Department Of The Interior! Which is going just swimmingly from what I’ve heard!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]30 Seconds To Mars[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen we have saved one of the best for last, I am super excited to have my next guest on, they have a new album called “America”. No tour dates yet but we will let you know. Playing their song called “Dangerous Night”, let’s give it up for 30 Seconds To Mars!!!!

Thank you very much everybody! This is the season finale for the Top 10! I want to thank my staff, my crew, my fans, everyone who has been keeping the Top 10 going throughout this crazy year. I also want to thank all my hosts, you were great! We will be taking a much deserved break, we’ll be back on January 9th, 2019 with a new edition live from Portland! See you next year!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: UCB Theater Franklin St, Hollywood, CA
Special Thanks To: UCB Theater Management
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: UCLA Gospel Choir, Westwood
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
30 Seconds To Mars Appear Courtesy Of:
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: [email protected]

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

December 12, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-23: Anarchy In The UK For Real Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-23: Anarchy In The UK For Real Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots!! What’s up London???? We made it! We are here! I mean whew!!! And man did we pick the right week to visit London or what? So why do a British themed edition you might ask? Well back in June when we were first planning our road shows we were really impressed with how much you hate Trump by protesting his visit to the UK. I mean you hate him! You really hate him! And people thought I was crazy to plan a UK show in London in December, but hey we’ve got a staff and crew and $400 flights on British Airways is pretty tempting don’t you think? We got time for the thing? Sure. So we here at the Top 10 like to point out that perfect gift for that special someone. And rapper Soulja Boy has just the perfect gift for you at the last minute. Yes if you haven’t heard by now, he’s hawking very cheap, questionable quality electronics from China and Russia and passing them off as his own. But wait here’s more! Let’s roll tape! Yes, for $20 – and what says “quality” more than a $20 smartwatch that you can get shipped from China or Russia? That’s basically nothing more than just an Apple watch that’s been remanufactured about 100 times. And then for $10 you can get Souljapods – basically just cheap knock offs of the Apple pods. Or for $160 you can get the Souljapad which is a cheap Android tablet. And then there’s the SouljaGame Console and SouljaGame Handheld – both of which come with “800 games”. Sure. If you want to believe that. I mean this is really some Krusty The Klown level territory here. OK that’s enough of the intro this week, we got a lot of idiocy to get to for our Big British Special. But first SNL Weekend Update from this weekend was hilarious and well, you have to see it:

So where do we begin for our big British special? Well to start with we’re going to get you up to speed on the latest happenings in Brexit (1). Yeah it’s a hot mess and we will do our best to sort out all the madness. But in the second slot, UK journalists are having some fun coming up with post-Brexit scenarios (2) and hey, the Sex Pistols were right – we could see Anarchy In The UK for real this time! In the third slot this week we’ve got to talk about some stuff that happened back home with the death of president George HW Bush (3) and Trump basically got the cold shoulder at his funeral. In the fourth slot this week is Facebook, Twitter And Youtube (4), and conservatives *STILL* think that social media sites are biased against them and well their latest attempt to hammer that point home is the stuff of insanity! In the number 5 slot this week is our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates (5) and this week we’re going to revisit an old topic – cell phone spying, and it’s been made even more relevant now that the CEO of Huawei was arrested in Vancouver for espionage. What’s really going on here? At the number 6 slot is our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in Holy Shit (6) and this week the Christian right is up to its’ usual bag of tricks and while Jewish people are celebrating Chanukah this week, they plan on crashing the party! And it is quite insane. For the seventh slot this week we’ve got a new edition of “Beating A Dead Horse” and we’re going to explore offensive song lyrics – is it finally time to retire the classic Christmas song Baby It’s Cold Outside? We’ll let you be the judge! For the 8th slot this week we’ve got a new segment – “What’s Up With The Royal Family”? Because the Royal Family, like all families, is straight up crazy and we’ll profile some juicy bits for you all! And in the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week we’ve got a new version of one of my favorite segments – “I Need A Drink” and this week we’re going to a very New York City event – Santa Con! Yes, it’s the annual Santa Con convention and like most times when you mix booze and a theme, what could possibly go wrong? Everything! And finally this week for our big British special we’ve got a new installment of our ongoing series that explains how government works to your conspiracy theorist friends and neighbors, Deep State Diaries (10) and this week we’re going to explore a very British branch of the government – MI-6! That’s James Bond’s employers don’t you know? Plus we’ve got some live music from Slash! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Brexit
[br] [/font] [br]

So you might be asking why are we doing a special British edition of the Top 10? When we were planning to do the Top 10 live was right around the time of Trump’s visit to the UK. Well we contacted the UK Liberal Democratic party after Trump’s visit and they said that if we could fill up a club we could easily come over here. Well, we did. With that out of the way, we got to talk some Brexit. It’s been in the news a lot. And for all the wrong reasons. The BBC and the press are saying that Thresa May is entering into uncharted territory here. Well, I got news for ya. We’ve been in uncharted territory since the day the Brexit vote went down. I mean who knew that a hostile foreign power was looking to upend the world’s democracies and replace them with true fascist dictatorships? Well…

More than a year and a half ago, British Prime Minister Theresa May invoked Article 50 of the treaty that established the European Union, declaring the U.K.'s intention to become the first member to leave the international bloc. At the time, the move seemed to be a crossing of the Rubicon, an indelible step toward departure.

Now, the EU's highest court says the U.K. can cross back if it wants.

The Court of Justice of the European Union ruled Monday that the U.K. is allowed to reverse its decision to notify the EU of its intent to leave — and to do so entirely on its own, without the consent of the bloc's other member states.

That window for the U.K. is open so long as it hasn't implemented a final Brexit agreement with the EU — and would remain open until Article 50 was due to take effect on March 29, 2019.
https://www.npr.org/2018/12/10/675230990/u-k-can-still-back-out-of-brexit-if-it-wants-top-eu-court-rules

We can already picture that Putin is doing that in his bunker at the Kremlin somewhere. So what does this deal mean that May invoked article 50 of the treaty? Well in my efforts to understand the Brexit situation, well, shit, I’m going to be honest – I don’t understand this situation. I don’t think anybody can understand it. Calling it a category 5 shit storm is an understatement. It’s easily a category 7 or maybe an 8. But understand that the shit has already hit the fan!

Image copyright Reuters

It is not possible to renegotiate the Irish border backstop proposal without "opening up all aspects" of the Brexit withdrawal agreement, the Irish prime minister has said.

Leo Varadkar was speaking shortly before it was confirmed that Tuesday's vote on the deal has been called off.

The DUP deputy leader Nigel Dodds said the delay was a "humiliation" Theresa May had brought on herself.

The prime minister has said she will seek extra assurances on the backstop.

It comes as the European Court of Justice ruled the UK can cancel Brexit without the permission of the other 27 EU members.

Mrs May made a statement to MPs in the Commons on Monday afternoon, and said she had listened to "widespread and deep concerns" from MPs about the backstop.

It is the insurance policy aimed at avoiding a hard border between Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland after Brexit.
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-northern-ireland-46468409

Yeah clean that up! So what’s the smoking gun here? Or as Trump called it “smocking gun”? Well, a lot has been happening in the last week on this and we will do our best to try to understand it. But as I said if we can’t understand it, no one can, and I’m almost certain that Parliament will make a much bigger mess out of this than it needs to be! I mean couldn’t they just reverse the vote?

The European Union’s top court has found that the EU treaties do allow the UK unilaterally to change its mind and to withdraw its Article 50 application to leave the European Union.

The Luxembourg-based Court of Justice of the European Union delivered an unusually “expedited” decision on a question forwarded by a Scottish court at the request of a number of MSPs, MPs and MEPs. They sought to challenge the idea that the Article 50 application by the UK was irrevocable unless supported by all the remaining member states.

In Monday’s judgment, the full court has ruled that when a member state has notified the European Council of its intention to withdraw from the European Union, that member state is free to revoke unilaterally that notification.

That possibility exists for as long as a withdrawal agreement concluded between the EU and that member state has not entered into force or, if no such agreement has been concluded, for as long as the two-year period from the date of the notification of the intention to withdraw from the EU, and any possible extension, has not expired.
https://www.irishtimes.com/news/world/europe/brexit-uk-can-revoke-article-50-european-court-rules-1.3726021

Wait, so they can simply cancel the vote? That’s genius! Why couldn’t we have done that? Yeah let’s elect a completely unhinged billionaire real estate developer as president! What could go wrong? Oh and let’s allow the people to vote on whether or not the UK can leave the EU! What could go wrong? Well a whole lot apparently!

Underneath this country’s worst political crisis in 80 years and the Westminster drama that looks set to reach a crescendo lie deep cultural and attitudinal divisions that will sit at the core of this country for decades to come. For millions of people, a basic stance on Brexit runs much deeper than any affinity they might feel with a political party: recent work by the psephologist John Curtice found that 77% of us identify with either side of the debate to a strong extent, as against only 37% who feel a similar allegiance to a party, with the respective figures for “very strong” put at 44% and a miserable 9%. This is not a country essentially split between Labourites and Tories: we are now either leavers or remainers, with large swathes of each camp motivated by boiling passions.

Obviously, the Brexit divide is only symptomatic of even more fundamental differences. Not long after the referendum, it was no great surprise to read that how voters felt about Europe slotted into their opinions on multiculturalism, social liberalism, the internet, globalisation and immigration; nor that such factors as age, class and education had been central to how people voted. Indeed, when I was out on the road during the campaign, it felt as if an even simpler question would decide the outcome: whether your view of the globalist, liberal future into which the country seemed to be inevitably heading was optimistic, or whether prejudice or a pessimism rooted in deep economic insecurity (or both) had pushed you to the opposite conclusion.

Now, it would be foolish to pretend that millions of people aren’t contradictory bundles of both sets of views. Moreover, in the sense that pre-Brexit electoral politics often meant that the two main parties had to aim at bringing very different voters together in order to win elections, the gaps between large parts of the electorate were constantly smoothed over. The grim political perfection of Brexit, by contrast, was that it represented a convulsive argument about a package of stuff that went straight to the heart of all of these tensions, and decisively pushed people one way or the other. This was David Cameron’s unforgivable oversight. What had been bubbling away for decades therefore exploded – and, in the manner of a political combustion engine, is now doing so again and again.
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/dec/10/brexit-divides-tensions-political-vote

Yes, we don’t either. And this whole thing is beyond stupid made even worse by a PM who may or may not be on Putin’s payroll. Well we say that because Putin is responsible for pretty much everything horrible that’s been happening. Yeah really let’s just ask the guy who came up with the word “Brexit”:

Peter Wilding, the chairman of British Influence, invented the word Brexit.

He claims he is "neither a 'phile' nor a 'phobe', just a realist campaigning for British Influence in Europe".

Here, Mr Wilding explains the origins of Brexit, which he describes as a "sad word," and why he's not pleased it caught on.

Have you ever won a prize you didn't want?

On the day I handed in my notice as Europe Director for BSkyB to fight for Britain to take back control of Europe through my think-tank, British Influence, I wrote an article saying:

"Unless a clear view is pushed that Britain must lead in Europe at the very least to achieve the completion of the single market then the portmanteau for Greek euro exit might be followed by another sad word, Brexit."
https://news.sky.com/story/brexits-my-fault-how-the-word-i-invented-could-be-an-epitaph-for-the-nations-decline-11576816

[font size="8"]Post Brexit Scenarios
[br] [/font] [br]

We need some music for this one!

Brexit is a category 5 shit storm. But let’s say that it’s a storm of a category that hasn’t even been invented yet. And the UK is basically in a pickle about what to do. It’s literally a “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” scenario, and there’s plenty of ways that it could go, and they all seem very horrible. I mean the Sex Pistols weren’t wrong – we could be witnessing anarchy in the UK. For real this time!

The EU Withdrawal Act, passed by Parliament in June, sets out some rules. The government would have to produce a new plan of action within 21 days and then allow a further vote within another seven sitting days in the House of Commons.

However, the government could act much more quickly than that. And it's possible that political events would transform the situation.

There are a number of possible outcomes if MPs fail to back the deal - but here are six of the most likely ones:

no deal
a second vote on a deal
a major renegotiation
a general election
a vote of no confidence
another referendum

Following a government defeat in the Commons last week, MPs would now have more say in proposing alternatives to any plan of action - but these would still have to be put into law by the government.

The European Court of Justice has ruled that it would be legal for the UK to unilaterally revoke Article 50 to cancel Brexit (without the need for agreement from the other 27 EU countries).

With the government still committed to Brexit, it's very likely that a major event such as a further referendum.
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-46393399

No we are not kidding you. So what could go down? It’s literally the angel and the devil on Theresa May’s shoulder right now and I’m sure they’re engaged in a political battle! Because I mean really who isn’t these days? I mean you know they’re worse off for this right? Even I could have told you that and I’m just an armchair comedian!

Governments don't usually say their policies will leave the economy worse off, but these are not normal times for Theresa May.

As the U.K. prime minister attempts to sell her Brexit deal agreed Sunday in Brussels to MPs at home, her government produced analysis showing all Brexit scenarios would hurt the economy but the impact of leaving under May's plans would be significantly less than exiting with no agreement at all.

The government analysis was echoed later in the day by a separate report from the Bank of England, which warned economic output in the U.K. could drop by as much as 8 percent if Britain drops out of the EU without a deal in place, compared to expectations had the U.K. stayed in. That compares to a 6.25 percent drop during the 2008 financial crisis.

May defended her government at her weekly question-and-answer session in the House of Commons, saying that her deal is the best available to protect the economy and "honor" the 2016 EU referendum result. She was met with widespread criticism, both from the Labour opposition, who dubbed her plan the "worst of all worlds," and from Brexiteers, who questioned the validity of the reports' assumptions.
https://www.politico.eu/article/best-case-brexit-scenario-means-2-5-percent-hit-to-uk-growth-over-15-years/

Yeah that’s kind of what we are doing right now! Seriously calling this a “clusterfuck” really is only beginning to state it. Even calling it a “colossal fuck up” isn’t really putting it correctly. Hell I think the only proper way to describe it is to come up with a string of profanities that haven’t even been invented yet! Or as they say in the movie “Animal House” – the words are so profound and disgusting that the decorum prohibits me from listing them here. So let’s go through a couple of these scenarios:

1. MPs vote in favour of the deal

This is possibly the easiest outcome in terms of pushing forward with Brexit, but the hardest to obtain, given the sheer number of Conservative MPs who have said they will vote against the deal. A vote in favour would give the prime minister the power to tell the EU that the deal has been ratified by parliament.

But the government would still need to pass a hefty amount of legislation as the Brexit process continues. This would begin with the EU (Withdrawal Agreement) Bill – a piece of legislation which the House of Commons Library thinks could happen before Christmas.

In the event that this first option doesn’t happen (which seems increasingly likely), the future is all a bid muddled. This is partly because it depends if MPs vote in favour of any amendments to the motion on December 11. Here, the possible outcomes would be:
2. MPs vote against the deal but in favour of an amendment

The House of Commons speaker, John Bercow, can select up to six amendments to a proposed bill to also be debated and voted on by the house. In this case, the proposed amendments include one by Labour MP Hilary Benn to reject both the Brexit deal and a no-deal scenario in an attempt to enhance the power for MPs to find an alternative. Labour and the SNP have said they will support the amendment. Other amendments include extending the Article 50 deadline to give more time to decide how to proceed.

If MPs vote against the main motion on the deal, the government would give a statement to the House of Commons within 21 days setting out how it plans to proceed, as specified in the EU Withdrawal Act 2018. This would bring us to January 1, 2019. Parliament would be given a week to debate the contents of this statement, before a further round of ministerial statements reporting on progress by January 21.

This handy chart put together by parliament shows how this would all work.
http://theconversation.com/what-happens-after-brexit-vote-four-possible-scenarios-explained-108279

You know what? Let’s take a look at the flow chart that could potenitally explain what’s going on.

You know I’m no expert but I think if you have that many items on your flow chart, your plan is already too complicated and fucked up to begin with! It’s like a Wes Anderson movie where the characters explain their overly complicated plans like they’re in a James Bond movie. I mean really this whole thing is completely insane. But apparently nothing is off the table!

This could include reopening the EU withdrawal agreement, even though that comes with risk, the sources say.

Theresa May is understood to be pushing the EU for flexibility on the backstop.

This is the clause in the prime minister's EU withdrawal agreement that is meant to prevent the return of border checks in Northern Ireland.

It would see the UK aligned with EU customs rules until a future trade deal is agreed that does not include a physical border between the EU and the UK on the island of Ireland.
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-46503455

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font] [br]

Now getting back into some familiar territory here is the guy who we in the states currently call president and that’s Donald J. Trump – the most depressing looking guy at a funeral – and he’s not even in the casket! So what has Trump’s underwear in a wad this week? Yes, sir, I believe the term you’re looking for is “knickers”. Thanks for clearing that up! But we got to throw that Tweet from Monday up there, can we do that?

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1072095127894667265

Really you can’t make this shit up. Let’s break it down – especially the word “smocking”. And not only once, he said it twice! I personally can’t wait for: “The Smocking Gun: From The Files Of Police Squid!” that should be hilarious! And this was one of my other favorite tweets this week:

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1071177621445230596

Wait, what? We don't even know what it is yet! At least give us a clue!!! We want to know!!! Did a koala bear clear you? Or was it the 500 pages of blacked out? We don't know! Tell us!!!!! Well nothing cleared President T so here’s what really happened!

Special counsel Robert Mueller is showing his hand.

It started Tuesday night, when he filed a memo for Michael’s Flynn’s long-delayed sentencing after he pleaded guilty on Dec. 1, 2017, to lying to the FBI about his contacts with the Russians during the Trump campaign transition. Mueller recommended that Flynn receive little or no jail time based on his “substantial assistance” to the special counsel investigation.

That assistance seems to have been substantial indeed. Over the course of the past year, Flynn met with Mueller’s team or Justice Department attorneys no fewer than 19 times. Fully half of the memo detailing Flynn's assistance is redacted, a reminder that Mueller has a great many lines of investigation that no one, not even President Donald Trump, knows anything about.

Then Mueller filed sentencing memos for Paul Manafort and Michael Cohen. While Flynn got full credit for his early acceptance of responsibility and his complete cooperation, Manafort had his cooperation agreement rescinded because he was apparently incapable of being truthful. Not only has he lost the opportunity for his sentence to be reduced, Mueller will be asking the court to impose an even longer sentence because of Manafort’s false statements.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2018/12/10/sentencing-memo-flynn-cohen-manafort-mueller-donald-trump-russia-column/2257509002/

That’s real! That happened! I mean in that clip Trump looks like he’s not only groping the flag but acting like the flag is his BFF. OK getting off track here. But apparently it looks like Mueller has got Trump into a corner. Which is great because that’s probably the only thing he fits into anymore. I mean did you see him at the Bush funeral? He’s so fat that he can barely sit in a pew!

Watergate reporter Carl Bernstein said Sunday that President Trump has been cornered for the first time in his life.

"He is boxed in by Mueller and the people around him know that he is and it's on the question of ... possible collusion with Russia and unquestionably a massive obstruction of justice that is now demonstrable for all to see, led by the president of the United States to cover up whatever the dealings of himself, his family, his aides were with Russia," Bernstein told CNN's "Reliable Sources" Sunday, following several bombshell legal filings last week by Robert Mueller's special counsel team regarding people close to the president.

"It certainly looks like they are the kind of offense that would call for impeachment hearings into the conduct of the president of the United States," Bernstein said.

"There's something much more important than just impeachment going on and that is the fact that Donald Trump for the first time in his life was cornered."
https://thehill.com/homenews/media/420462-bernstein-trump-is-boxed-in-by-mueller

Yes, we know, sir! By the way in case you’re wondering what the over – under is on Trump actually getting indicted and maybe even serving some jail time, well, more people favor it than not but that’s not what the odds guarantee. I don’t know can you gamble on stuff like that here? Really? Cool!

Half of Americans believe special counsel Robert Mueller will personally implicate President Trump in wrongdoing, according to a CNN poll released Tuesday.

Respondents' answers were notably divided along partisan lines, but of the Republicans surveyed 23 percent said they thought the special counsel would personally implicate Trump and 47 percent of independents said the same. Among Democrats surveyed, 78 percent believe that Trump will ultimately be implicated in the special counsel’s report.

Most of those surveyed, 59 percent, also consider the investigation a serious matter, with about 35 percent saying Mueller’s probe is an attempt to discredit the president.

The poll comes days after court filings from Mueller revealed new details in his cases against former Trump attorney Michael Cohen and former Trump campaign chairman Paul Manafort.

Friday’s filings alleged that Trump personally directed Cohen to make payments to silence two women regarding affairs they say they had with Trump prior to his running for president.
https://thehill.com/homenews/administration/420725-half-of-americans-say-mueller-investigation-will-implicate-trump-in

[font size="8"]Google, Facebook, & Youtube
[br] [/font] [br]

American conservatives just cant seem to let go of the fact that they think they’re being censored on major internet outlets like Google, Facebook and Youtube. And really, no one wants to be censored but they keep beating that shit over the head. And yes, we have covered this previously in “Beating A Dead Horse” (see: Idiots #5-2 ) and they just won’t seem to let it go. I mean look at who crashed the party when Google was getting interviewed on Capitol Hill!

Infowars founder Alex Jones and longtime Trump associate Roger Stone made an appearance outside Google CEO Sundar Pichai's hearing before the House Judiciary committee today.

Jones, a far-right conspiracy theorist who's accused the nation's leading tech companies of anti-conservative bias, railed against Google for "censorship" in the halls of Congress minutes before the meeting began.

"Sundar and Google are absolutely the most horrible corporation on earth," Jones said.

Jones was flanked by Roger Stone, the longtime associate to President Donald Trump.

Read more: https://www.politico.com/story/2018/12/11/alex-jones-roger-stone-google-ceo-hearing-1055994

Yup bet you didn’t think it was gonna be him did you? And you think you’re so smart! Oh and to be fair to Alex, at least it’s a step above yelling at a pile of poop! That one still kills me! So what do they have to be angry about this week? I mean it’s not like Facebook is in some deep shit or anything!

By almost any measure, 2018 has been a terrible year for Facebook (NASDAQ:FB). The company's image has been hammered by scandals including Cambridge Analytica's unauthorized use of user data, the use of the platform to spark a genocide of Rohingya Muslims in Myanmar, the aftermath of Russian interference in the 2016 U.S. presidential election, and, most recently, revelations that Facebook hired an opposition research firm to tie its opponents to George Soros and even accuse them of anti-Semitism. The result of the near-constant negative attention is that users, activists, and even legislators are questioning whether Facebook is a net positive for democracy, and many are demanding increased regulation and oversight of the social network.

On the business side, the company faced challenges as user growth plateaued in its core markets in North America in Europe, and management said margins would narrow as it invested in additional employees and tech tools to help restore user trust in the platform and better serve its mission of connecting people in a positive way. The slowing growth and rising costs, along with the brand image problems, weighed on the stock, pushing shares down more than 20% for the year.
https://www.fool.com/investing/2018/12/11/at-facebook-scandals-and-slowing-growth-made-for-a.aspx

That happened. Yes Facebook is still getting grilled for their role in the 2016 election. So what do they have to hide? Why it’s a hell of a lot if you dig past the headlines. In fact Mark Zuckerberg actually *DOES* plan to punish speech but it wants to give people an out. Like an airing of grievances, of sorts. I mean who is he, Frank Costanza?

Last month, Mark Zuckerberg, Facebook’s CEO and majority shareholder, published a memo on censorship. “What should be the limits to what people can express?” he asked. “What content should be distributed and what should be blocked? Who should decide these policies and make enforcement decisions?”

The company had previously posted its community standards and the internal guidelines that it uses when attempting to enforce those standards.

Now its CEO was looking to the future.

One idea he aired might be thought of as a Supreme Court of Facebook. “I’ve increasingly come to believe that Facebook should not make so many important decisions about free expression and safety on our own,” Zuckerberg wrote. “In the next year, we’re planning to create a new way for people to appeal content decisions to an independent body, whose decisions would be transparent and binding.”

A person who was kicked off the platform, or frustrated that a certain kind of post is consistently censored, might soon have a new venue to air his grievances.
https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2018/12/facebook-punish-censorship/577654/

So that aside there is a hearing this week and if there’s anything further coming on this we will keep updating you on this story but for now here’s what you need to know. They just can’t let this shit go, the Trump cult is that insane and they will let their voices be heard, just like the airing of grievances!

It was Sundar Pichai's turn in the congressional hot seat.

Google's CEO testified before the House Judiciary Committee on Tuesday where lawmakers grilled him on a wide range of issues, including potential political bias on its platforms, its plans for a censored search app in China and its privacy practices.

This is the first time Pichai has appeared before Congress since Google declined to send him or Alphabet CEO Larry Page to a hearing on foreign election meddling earlier this year. That slight sparked anger among senators who portrayed Google as trying to skirt scrutiny.

The hearing culminated a tough year for big tech companies, as lawmakers and the public have become increasingly skeptical about Silicon Valley's effects on democracy, misinformation and privacy. Through the course of Tuesday's proceedings, the soft-spoken Pichai remained cool and confident overall while defending Google in the face of the sometime's intense questioning.
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/12/11/google-ceo-sundar-pichai-testifies-before-congress-on-bias-privacy.html

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Huawei Spying
[br] [/font] [br]

Hey London it’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

Cell phone spying is a very tricky subject. But one company is more guilty of that than all the other companies, and that is Chinese phone and electronics manufacturing conglomerate Huawei. But since the last time we covered this subject, there have been some shocking new developments in how Huawei handles its’ business with its’ phones, tablets, laptops and other electronics. So why is the US government so paranoid about Huawei? Well just like it’s dealings with Russian-based Kaspersky, it has every reason to be suspect.

The US is again warning its allies about the risks of using telecom equipment made by China’s Huawei. American officials have briefed their counterparts in countries like Germany, Italy, and Japan about what they argue are potential cybersecurity risks, according to the Wall Street Journal (paywall). This follows previous warnings, such as a claim earlier this year that American citizens shouldn’t use Huawei’s phones.

The US may be concerned about Chinese government influence embedded in Huawei’s technology because America’s spy agencies have done the same thing in the past.

Western governments have long been wary of Huawei, which was founded by Ren Zhengfei, a former People’s Liberation Army soldier. (The recent arrest of Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou, who is Zhengfei’s daughter, over allegations of violating of Iran trade sanctions is apparently separate to concerns about cyber espionage.)

Shenzhen-based Huawei, founded in 1987, has grown into the world’s largest supplier of telecom network equipment, beating out firms like Cisco, Ericsson, and Nokia. Critics see Huawei as a possible Trojan horse that, once embedded in international communications systems, could provide opportunities for Chinese government spying or remote control of vital telecom systems. Huawei has vigorously denied these claims.
https://qz.com/1489707/the-us-is-worried-about-china-spying-via-huawei-because-it-did-the-same/

So Huawei lied about spying. Is anyone really that shocked? Really? If you are not shocked by this you are in the wrong place. But here’s where the recent developments come into play. Last week Huawei’s CEO was arrested in Vancouver for espionage. Let’s take a look at what that means.

The chief financial officer of Chinese tech giant Huawei has been arrested in Canada. She faces extradition to the United States.
Meng Wanzhou, also known as Sabrina Meng and Cathy Meng, was apprehended in Vancouver on December 1, according to Canadian Justice Department spokesman Ian McLeod. In addition to her role as CFO, Meng serves as deputy chairwoman of Huawei's board. She's the daughter of Huawei founder Ren Zhengfei.

Meng "is sought for extradition by the United States, and a bail hearing has been set for Friday," McLeod said in a statement, which was first reported by The Globe and Mail.
McLeod said the Canadian Justice Department can't share details of the case. Meng was granted a publication ban after a judge agreed to bar both police and prosecutors from releasing information about the case.

The US Justice Department sought the arrest as part of ongoing investigation, according to a law enforcement official.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/12/05/tech/huawei-cfo-arrested-canada/index.html

https://www.cnn.com/2018/12/05/tech/huawei-cfo-arrested-canada/index.html

What has people so scared of Huawei? It’s not just that the devices are known for spying on their customers or that they lied repeatedly. But with networks now upgrading their hardware and cell towers to the upcoming 5G standard, it seems that it could open the floodgates for spying and high definition video recording that previously hasn’t been seen before.

The US government has sought to press its allies to stop using equipment developed by Huawei, the Chinese telecom company with links to the country's military, amid spying fears.

US officials have contacted the governments of friendly nations including Japan, Italy and Germany to warn them about alleged risk of using Huawei devices. They are also thought to have contacted counterparts in Britain.

Huawei is one of the world's biggest manufacturers of telecom equipment, including the network kit required for next generation 5G mobile networks, which are now being rolled out globally.

Based in Shenzen, Huawei was founded in 1987 by Ren Zhengfei, a former engineer in the Chinese People's Liberation Army. The company's devices are rarely used in US government departments amid persistent concerns over Huawei's links to the Chinese government and the potential that its hardware could be used for espionage.

The US has considered boosting financial aid for technology development in countries that avoid using computer hardware made in China. The threat of possible espionage using Huawei network gear is thought to be a particular concern in countries that host US military bases, according to a report first published in the Wall Street Journal.
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/2018/11/23/us-presses-allies-stop-using-equipment-chinese-firm-amid-spy/

But just like a company that would stump for Trump, as it has in the past, Huawei is optimistic that it is growing “astronomically” which worries intelligence officials around the globe. Which really makes us wonder why they’re not using this to their advantage. Really is there anyone to blame in this mess? No, it’s just Huawei.

The arrest of Huawei's chief financial officer is just the latest controversy to hit the tech giant which has been accused of conducting espionage activities for the Chinese government.

"We don't know to what extent they might be considered an arms length business and to what extent they might be simply an arm of the Chinese government," said David Skillicorn, a professor in Queen's University School of Computing.

Huawei Technologies Co. Ltd. has been thrust into the spotlight with the arrest of Meng Wanzhou, its chief financial officer and deputy chair of the board. According to a statement from the U.S. Department of Justice, Meng was arrested in Vancouver on Saturday and is being sought for extradition by the United States.

The Globe and Mail reported Wednesday that Meng was arrested on suspicion of violating U.S. trade sanctions on Iran. She has a bail hearing in Canada on Friday.
https://www.cbc.ca/news/business/huawei-china-telecom-arrest-spying-1.4934905

Well, maybe if you have a Huawei device. We will keep an eye on this situation and any further developments. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day!

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
[br] [/font] [br]

Gather around, my fair brothers and sisters of London, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate! For the Holy Church of the Top 10 has convened and it’s our weekly duty to remind you why the holiest among us are also the most full of:

My fair congregation, we are glad that you are joining us as we visit a new country! But while we are in that country, that doesn’t mean that the Christian right back home gets to take a week off. For they have said some truly horrible and stunning things and done some equally horrible events. Just last week they held an event so utterly terrible that they actually got kicked out of the Museum Of The Bible! I mean what kind of hogwash do you have to pull to get kicked out of the Museum Of The Bible? Well something like this!

On the day before the start of “Revolution 2018,” the Museum of the Bible abruptly refused to host the gathering. Right Wing Watch reported on the gathering and its hosts on Monday; on Wednesday, according to Religion News Service, the Museum of the Bible decided, “under pressure” from some members of its own advisory board, not to allow Lamplighter Ministries to hold its gathering at the museum. Museum staff helped the group scramble to make a last-minute move to the Trump International Hotel.

Lamplighter’s Jon Hamill, a self-styled spiritual Paul Revere, had plugged Revolution 2018 during the dominionist Rise Up 2018 gathering at Harry Jackson’s church the day before the election.

According to the Religion News Service’s Yonat Shimron, “a group of biblical scholars, including some members of the museum’s own advisory board, objected strongly to the gathering, saying it betrayed the values the museum says it wants to uphold, including being open to people of all religious faiths.”

It’s not entirely clear what kind of unwritten line Revolution 2018 crossed, given that the Museum of the Bible has hosted events for all kinds of Religious Right groups. In fact, Lamplighter Ministries held Revolution 2017 at the museum last year.

But as Revolution 2018 got under way at Trump International Hotel on Thursday, organizers weren’t looking backward. In fact, several speakers at the afternoon and evening sessions said that the move to the Trump hotel was the fulfillment of prophecy, something orchestrated by God as part of his unfolding plan to bring transformation to the United States.

“We thought we were going to be in the Museum of the Bible tonight launching Revolution. But God had other plans,” Hamill told attendees. “Can we thank God to celebrate freedom in the Trump International Hotel? We are getting back on track! This train has come into station! We are now in the turnaround that God has prophesied, and we are setting a new course, a new way forward for this nation.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/prophetic-group-says-eviction-from-museum-of-the-bible-was-part-of-gods-plan/

Of course like all terrible things the people who are supposedly anointed by GAWD himself turn to the hotel that is owned by the Dark One, whose name shall never be spoken in my church! Except for that one time I did, but exceptions have to be made! I mean these are the people who think that the Dark One was appointed by GAWD himself! And I think even the good LAWRD JAYSUS would think these people are off their rocker! Or they are batshit crazy.

After encountering a barrage of criticism for agreeing to rent space to a charismatic Christian group that claims the Trump presidency is part of God’s plan, the Museum of the Bible abandoned plans to host the group and moved its meeting to the Trump International Hotel.

The Revolution 2018 event, a three-day conference run by Jon and Jolene Hamill of Lamplighter Ministries, begins in the nation’s capital Thursday (Dec. 6). It is intended, its website said, to “focus on real-time prophetic revelation with governmental authority.”

The group, which held a similar conference at the Museum of the Bible last year, boasted in promotional material for the event that the museum “represents an ‘Ark of the Covenant’ for our nation.”

It also emblazoned the word “Hanukkah” on its poster and alluded to the Jewish holiday as being providential.

“Something is about to change,” wrote the Hamills on the website. “I feel a visitation is at hand. And He is summoning us together for a very important moment which will redefine our future. Not a coincidence we are gathering over Hanukkah.”
https://religionnews.com/2018/12/06/under-pressure-museum-of-the-bible-moves-charismatic-christian-conference-off-site/

I believe that passage is in my good book! Now of course they DELIBERATELY chose that date, you don’t have to be a moron to buy into their nonsense that it was coincidental! These are the people who believe that Dark One was chosen by GAWD! Really, these people.

Now just remember that the good LAWRD JAYSUS thinks these people are full of shit! In fact they’re so extreme that they got barred from the Museum Of The Bible, which hosted their event last year. Really for those of you Brits who are here attending tonight, just remember that our religious right are batshit fucking crazy. Really, they’re part of a lifestyle brand. It’s not just going to church every Sunday, you have to be involved in the brand 24 hours a day! I mean these people are so extreme that even Biblical scholars were against this gathering!

The Trump International Hotel in Washington, D.C., which towers above other buildings near the White House, is best known for hosting global diplomats and prominent dignitaries in its lavish facilities.

But last Friday afternoon (Dec. 7), one of the hotel’s many glimmering ballrooms was transformed into a sanctuary, where dozens of worshippers held their hands aloft and spoke in tongues as Jon Hamill, co-founder of Washington, D.C.-based Lamplighter Ministries, led the group in prayer.

Hamill — whom supporters describe as a prophet — closed his eyes tightly and shouted above the chattering: “In Jesus’ name, we declare the Deep State will not prevail!”

He then hammered a judge’s gavel onto a podium as people raised their voices in approval.
https://religionnews.com/2018/12/10/at-trumps-hotel-spiritual-warriors-pray-for-the-president-in-his-darkest-hour/

So pray for the poor, downtrodden Dark One at his own hotel in his darkest hour. That’s all you need to know for this week. Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse
[br] [/font] [br] B

Hey it’s time for:

Christmas in the #MeToo era. Yes, this is our second Christmas post #MeToo, and it’s had us examining the harsh reality of many of our all time favorite Christmas classics – whether it’s A Charlie Brown Christmas or Rudolph The Red Nose Reindeer. Yes that’s a thing – people are saying that Rudolph The Red Nose Reindeer encourages bullying. So does that mean that Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer encourages vehicular homicide? Well, yes. But really the one that we got to talk about called “Baby It’s Cold Outside”. Now don’t worry – before we get into it, we promise that we’ll keep it tasteful. But really this has set off a firestorm of insanity.

After a Cleveland radio station pulled “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” from its Christmas rotation due to its controversial lyrics, others have followed suit — but not all listeners are happy about it.

National Public Radio reports that at least two stations, one in San Francisco and another in Denver, ultimately decided to hold a vote to determine whether the song would be heard on their airwaves.

Brian Figula, the program director at the former, KOIT, described the response as a “tornado,” and the outlet cites “hundreds of comments on social media and via email” that demanded “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” be put back on the playlist.

“People are unbelievably passionate about their Christmas music,” Figula explained. “It’s the one thing that you can’t mess with … [Listeners rely on it] to reminisce to the good old days when life was easy and simple.”
https://people.com/music/baby-its-cold-outside-radio-ban-controversy/

Yeah and if there’s one group of people who you don’t fuck with, it’s Christmas music fans. They are very passionate about their holiday traditions! But really this is the kind of thing that gives movements like #MeToo and leaves a bad taste in people’s mouths. Hey I just realized that sentence I just said was totally creepy! Well you know why don’t we just ask the writer of Baby It’s Cold Outside what he thinks?

Baby, it’s really, really cold outside for Frank Loesser’s Oscar-winning song this Christmas season.

Under fire amid the #MeToo movement from critics who say "Baby, It's Cold Outside" is sexist and hints at date rape, radio stations in Cleveland and San Francisco have dropped the holiday staple from their Christmas playlists and others in the U.S. and Canada are following suit.

This is not sitting well with the daughter of Broadway legend Frank Loesser, who said she has heard complaints in the past about her dad’s ditty but blames Bill Cosby for turning it into something fiendish.

"Bill Cosby ruined it for everybody," Susan Loesser told NBC News on Thursday. “Way before #Me Too, I would hear from time to time people call it a date rape song. I would get annoyed because it’s a song my father wrote for him and my mother to sing at parties. But ever since Cosby was accused of drugging women, I hear the date rape thing all the time.”
https://www.nbcnews.com/pop-culture/music/daughter-baby-it-s-cold-outside-writer-frank-loesser-blames-n944901

First off I’m not touching this one with a 10 foot pole, you can make your own jokes. But second I mean come on really? Is that where we’re at? Remember when Bill Maher a few months ago said that we’ve reached “Peak Snowflake”? Well that peak might be getting higher. Yeah there’s lots of things that probably wouldn’t fly today exactly. But do we really need to start pulling songs that have been around 60+ years for something like this?

Copeland didn’t, and it wasn’t a surprise. You’d be hard-pressed to find anyone these days who would sing lyrics that endorse domestic violence as a key to relationship longevity.

Like an ill-advised spring break tattoo, some standards and pop chestnuts aren’t aging well. In a culture increasingly vocal about whatever demeans women, makes light of sexual assault, or equates violence with love, such songs are rightly being shunned.

That’s why some radio stations are yanking “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” from their holiday playlists. Written by Frank Loesser, it’s been a beloved perennial for decades. At the center of debate is its story line — a man unconvinced that a woman’s “no” really means “no.” She wants to go home; using the lousy weather as an excuse, he’s cajoling her to stay. She also needs a ride, but he makes no offer to oblige her. At the very least, he’s an insufferable jerk.

The creep factor amplifies after she agrees to “just a half drink more,” then asks, “Say, what’s in this drink?” Whatever Loesser’s lyrical intentions were when he wrote it in 1944, it now makes me say, “You in danger, girl.”

Today, the song “seems very manipulative and wrong,” said Glenn Anderson of Cleveland’s WDOK-FM, one of the first radio stations to ban the song. “In a world where #MeToo has finally given women the voice they deserve, the song has no place.”
https://www.bostonglobe.com/opinion/2018/12/07/when-sexual-assault-and-domestic-violence-were-set-music/r4tzpGeNYcMg1E3cC9mDqL/story.html

Oh come on even Putin is giving you the facepalm! And that guy has no sense of humor! And really, that’s the reason why that song should be banned? That sounds like it would be something that Trump would say! “That’s very manipulative, and WRONG, OK? SAD!”. OK so the song might be a little creepy after you read the lyrics but would it seriously border on rape territory? Well I’m going to let you be the judge because some stations are bringing it back!

Gayle King got so fired up over criticism of “Baby, It’s Cold Outside,” she accidentally swore on the air on Thursday.

The “CBS This Morning” the co-anchor expressed her affinity for the tune penned in 1944 by Frank Loesser. She spoke out in the song’s defense after a news segment on the CBS show acknowledged that some radio stations have recently banned the tune.

The CBS piece mentioned San Francisco radio station KOIT is conducting a poll to see if the song, which it banned Monday, should remain off its playlist.

In Chicago, LITE-FM 93.9 was still including the song in its playlist as of noon Wednesday.

“At last check, the votes were running more than 90 percent in the song’s favor. Please count me in the 90 percent,” King said to her co-hosts, John Dickerson and Norah O’Donnell. “I just feel I want to say to people: ‘It’s a Christmas song that was written years ago.’
https://chicago.suntimes.com/entertainment/a-heated-gayle-king-defends-baby-its-cold-outside/

[font size="8"]What’s Up With The Royals?
[br] [/font] [br]

What’s up with the Royals?

So we’ve never mentioned the Royal Family on this show at least as far as I can remember so I’ve always wanted to do a segment that focuses exclusively on the Royals. Yeah exactly it’s like a train wreck – you don’t want to stare but you can’t look away. I’m certain that my British friends have had an ass full of the Royals but don’t worry – we’ll keep it tasteful, at least as far as our standards go. Which you know by now is pretty low. But what have the Royals been up to lately? Well I got to start with my favorite story about Prince Charles, which stems from a recent documentary on Netflix.

Being first in line for the British throne may have gone to Prince Charles’ head.

The Prince of Wales, 69, has reportedly earned a special nickname among the staff at Clarence House: The Pampered Prince. That’s because, according to Amazon Prime’s new documentary “Serving the Royals: Inside the Firm,” Charles needs help doing just about everything.

“His pajamas are pressed every morning, his shoelaces are pressed flat with an iron, the bath plug has to be in a certain position and the water temperature has to be just tepid,” Princess Diana’s former butler, Paul Burrell, revealed in the documentary, per Yahoo.

Burrell even said that Charles “has his valets squeeze one inch of toothpaste onto his toothbrush every morning.”

The butler’s duties reportedly extend to fetching items just a few feet away from the prince. “On one occasion, he rang me from his library and he said, ‘Oh Paul, a letter from the Queen seems to have fallen into my wastepaper bin. Would you pick it out?'” Burrell claimed.
https://pagesix.com/2018/11/01/prince-charles-has-his-shoelaces-ironed-every-morning/

Yes WTF indeed! So if Charles drops something on the floor he doesn’t even have to get out of the chair to pick it up! I don’t know – is that considered lazy or luxury in the UK? And by the way if you think that’s insane you should see a list of the things that the Royals can and cannot do. There’s so much about this that I don’t understand or even will begin to comprehend.

The Duchess of Sussex was spotted shutting her own car door this week during her first solo engagement, at the Royal Academy of Arts. This is apparently significant, with the Sun’s royal correspondent tweeting: “A princess [sic] who still takes the time to shut her car door.” Whether it will happen again remains to be seen, now the strangeness of it has been pointed out, but there are many everyday things the royals – mostly Charles, really – cannot or will not do.

• Carry cash The Queen is rarely seen without her Launer handbag, though it famously never contains any money – except, reportedly, for a neatly folded £5 note, and occasionally a tenner, for the church collection on Sundays.

• Squeeze their own toothpaste One of the enduring stories about Prince Charles is that someone squeezes his toothpaste on to a brush from a silver dispenser. Although this rumour has never officially been debunked, it is thought his then-valet Michael Fawcett only did this for a short while after Charles had broken his arm.

<snip>

• Open a car door According to Hoey, Prince Edward “was said to have reprimanded a butler because the man was not outside the house when he arrived back and Edward had to open the car door himself”. Perhaps it had the child-lock on. Hoey adds that Edward’s driver is “instructed to face the front at all times”.

<snip>

• Take selfies Meghan, as a self-respecting millennial, once had a blog and popular Instagram account – but no more. A fan, greeting Ms Markle – as she was then – in Nottingham asked for a selfie and was told: “We’re not allowed to do selfies.”
https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/shortcuts/2018/sep/26/meghan-markle-can-shut-her-own-car-door-so-why-cant-prince-charles-iron-his-own-shoelaces

So if you think that’s weird, oh it gets weirder. Of course I have to explain how the Royal Family works to my American audience but just… wow. Oh and it gets weirder. It’s Christmas time and of course the Royals have their own traditions which are very crazy.

The Royal Family's Christmas traditions are wackier than we could've imagined.

Centuries of tradition meets the New-Gen-Royals, the Royal Family's Christmas period looks a little different to us common scum.

Aside from the decadent banquets, accommodating world leaders and addressing the public on Christmas day, this is what the Royal fam gets up to in the Silly Season.

The Queen insists on reading ALL of the gags out at the dinner table. Reports say that when she was younger, she used to make up extra jokes after all of the crackers had been pulled because she didn't want the laughter to end.

The Royal Soccer Match is a more recent tradition, coined by Harry and Wills. The game is played on Christmas Eve, where the brothers join the Royal staff and surrounding villagers to raise money for charity.

Royal festivities are held in the Royal Estate in Sandringham each year. The decorations remain up until Queen and Prince Philip leave the estate in February, to honour Elizabeth's father who passed away in Sandringham on February 6th in 1952.

Yeah, not a joke. The tradition dates back to King Edward VII, who suggested that the members of the family were to be weighed before and after the meal to make sure they're sufficiently fed. While this royal tradition dates back to the early 1900s, it is still done today.
http://www.kiis1065.com.au/lifestyle/the-royal-family-weighed-weird-christmas-traditions

Holy shit! The Royals don’t leave their Christmas decorations up until February? Even on January 1st the car companies stop their ridiculous Christmas sales! Oh oh wait, they’re sales “events”. Is that a thing here in the UK? Yes it is! Really? So it’s just as annoying here as it is at home? I mean at home they show the commercials during the events now. Right. Thank you sir! I mean even the Royals celebrate the holidays differently than us regular folks do!

We all have some weird and wonderful family Christmas traditions, but we can promise you with absolute certainty that none of your wacky holiday quirks will beat out the Royals.

Royal expert and editor of Majesty, Ingrid Seward, recently dished all things Royal family to Grazia magazine and discussed how the Queen and her offspring spend Christmas, and one very odd tradition caught people’s attention.

Prepare to scratch your heads in confusion, folks:

Every member of the royal family has to be weighed before and after Christmas dinner.

We all know the amount of serious feasting that goes into the Royals Christmas day, so we can only imagine that having to see just how much you stuffed your face that year cannot be described as ideal.
https://www.instylemag.com.au/royal-family-weird-christmas-tradition

[font size="8"]I Need A Drink
[br] [/font] [br]

Hey London I really need a drink!

So of course you know by now that the idea of this is that we have a few drinks, get drunk, and talk about anything in the news that doesn’t relate to politics. And this week we’ve got our annual holiday gift guide. So tell me bartender, what goes well with Santa? Peppermint schnapps? No thanks, I can’t stand mint flavor. I’ll stick with my Jack Daniels mixed with Jack Daniels. Well the reason I bring up Santa is that this week was Santa Con in New York City and well, you should never mix booze and bros, because this is the kind of shit that happens. And the people of New York City always dread this kind of year. For good reason.

Over the last two decades, NYC has slowly turned into a playground for the rich—but for one very special day of the year, it transforms into a playground for the drunk. SantaCon swept into town on Saturday, leaving a trail of spilled beer, abandoned Santa hats, and candy cane colored upchuck across Midtown and the East Village.

There are of course plenty of Long Islanders and NJ residents who just want an excuse to have a fun day out with their friends, and organizers have taken pains to snuff out the worst behavior from participants... but there are the people, like the gentleman below, who are just obliterated. If you want to see one SantaCon video that summarizes what it's all about, here you go:

Charitable contributions aside, there is no culture or purpose to SantaCon other than binge drinking (and perhaps reliving fraternity days of yore). The first step to making SantaCon tolerable to the rest of New York is admitting that, letting go of the defensiveness, and then maybe erecting an electric fence around Murray Hill and letting participants roam free without worrying about anyone shouting "MAKE AMERICA SANTA AGAIN" at innocent passersby.

Despite alcohol being banned on all Metro North, LIRR and NJ Transit trains for the day, plenty of people got started nice and early Saturday morning. "We haven’t done anything but wake up and drink," visiting Philly resident Charlie Rahr admitted to the NY Post, inadvertently coining the official motto for the event.
http://gothamist.com/2018/12/10/santacon_photos_2018_nyc.php#photo-1

Wait, you can drink on the LIRR and I wasn’t aware of this? I will have to remember that for my next trip to New York City! Get the paper bag PBR special, or maybe you can go even cheaper and get a 40 of Thunderbird! But come on, the draw of Santa Con is that you can get drunk and get holly jolly on everyone’s ass. Just like in Jingle All The Way!

Nothing brings people together quite like getting drunk in a Santa costume — just ask Andy Cohen.

After ridiculing the boozy tradition, Cohen couldn’t help but join in on New York City’s annual SantaCon bar crawl over the weekend when he spotted a party on the roof of a nearby building.

“This is out my kitchen window. This is the beginning of SantaCon,” he said in his Instagram Story on Saturday while recording a party forming across the way. “There are four Santas on this roof. This can’t end well.”

As the party continued to grow, a few partygoers noticed Cohen’s videos and invited him over.

“Do I go? I feel kind of funny, but it could be classic,” he said.
https://people.com/tv/andy-cohen-crashes-santacon-party/

But people think that Santa Con is exclusively a New York City thing but the truth is – it happens all over the country! And besides NYC, San Francisco famously holds an annual Santa Convention and it is just as batshit crazy as, just like its’ NYC counterpart, also has a tendency to draw a particularly rowdy crowd.

Seven Santa Clauses who got higher than a rooftop were busted for being drunk on Saturday in San Francisco during the annual SantaCon pub crawl.

The Santas were nabbed downtown and at the northern waterfront, according to police officer Robert Rueca. Fifteen other Santas were treated by medics for being drunk, tipsy, wobbly, sick or in other conditions brought on by excessive good cheer.

SantaCon, the annual celebration that started in San Francisco in 1994 and spread around the world, features countless celebrants in Santa suits fanning out from Union Square and bellying up to countless bars.

“It’s not officially sanctioned,” said Rueca, “but people do have the freedom to wear whatever disguise they want — that’s out of our control.”

It was not immediately known if there were more drunk Santas this year than in past years. Rueca said that everyone, including Santa, is subject to the same rules about public drunkenness “and it doesn’t matter what outfit you’re wearing.”
https://www.sfchronicle.com/bayarea/article/Seven-Santa-Clauses-busted-for-public-drunkeness-13455721.php

And then what happens when a group of rowdy Santas goes to get booze? Well let’s just say it ends badly as it started, with these Santas trashing a popular restaurant in San Francisco. Which begs the question – if Santa’s on the naughty list, who is on the nice list?

Some Santa Claus revelers in San Francisco have made the jolly one's naughty list after trashing a popular Polk Street restaurant Saturday night.

On Monday, in the aftermath of the Santa Con participants' bad behavior, there was growing outrage over videos showing just how bad these Santas were.

Workers at Shalimar, a Pakistani restaurant, were still cleaning up Monday but managed to capture video Saturday night of Santa Con partiers demanding food they never ordered then one woman with a Santa hat in her hand shoving a cash register, a stereo and just about everything that was on the counter onto the floor.

Alejo Cano Chang said the group came in around 7 p.m. During the woman's outburst, she also threw a sugar shaker at him. The vandalism didn't stop there.
https://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/Naughty-List-Santa-Con-Revelers-Trash-San-Francisco-Restaurant-502428271.html

[font size="8"]Deep State Diaries Episode 23: M:I-6
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time for episode 23 of Deep State Diaries. Yes we’re touring the 24 branches and services that make up the United States government. Everything from the FBI to the IRS to the Pentagon to the CIA to the DPW to the DVA to parks and recreation and all branches and services in between. Of course if you’re here you probably already know more about our government and how it works than your average Fox News loving Trump supporter does. So that’s what this segment is going to address. We are going to do a deep dive into all that makes the United States the United States. Because we here at the Top 10 love to educate as well as entertain. Because we care.

[font size="6"]M:I-6/font]
https://t2.rbxcdn.com/0f24ba664d4ea25bd47a49ea19383985

We need some music for this one!

Yes for our edition of Deep State Diaries this week we figured that we would pay tribute to our British hosts by talking about the British counterpart to the organization we discussed last week – the Central Intelligence Agency. This week we’re delving into and hanging out with the British counterpart – the Military Intelligence: Section 6. If you recognize who M:I-6 is, that is of course the employer of James Bond from the 007 movies. But what else does the super secret organization do when their agents are not going out on world tours to exotic locales and having sex with some of the most beautiful women on the planet? Well stuff like this. So where did the inspiration for M come from?

The Secret Intelligence Service, otherwise known as MI6, works covertly overseas to gather intelligence. The world’s oldest intelligence agency was founded by the legendary spymaster Mansfield Smith-Cumming in 1909 as the Secret Service Bureau, and he ran it util his death in 1923. He was well-known and liked for his colourful personality.

Many of his innovations are still part of the lifeblood of MI6, say insiders.

Former secret agents tell all in 2014 Netflix documentary “Secrets of Her Majesty’s Secret Service".

Firstly, “good agents” were his most important tool, explains the documentary.

“From the very beginning, he understood it was all about collecting intelligence and recruiting and running sources," says Sir John Scarlett, who is himself a former MI6 chief.

"From the very beginning, that’s what he did. It’s just in the bloodstream."
https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/1057318/james-bond-real-mi6-chief-inspired-m-character-mansfield-smith-cumming-spt

Yeah so James Bond was partly inspired by real life M:I-6 agents! How about that? So that said how does M:I-6 take on different agencies like ISIS and Al’Qaeda from say, the CIA? Or maybe one of the big fish of the espionage world, Russia? Well it’s really interesting to get the M:I-6 perspective.

The head of MI6 said Russia broke one of the primary rules of espionage and won't be trusted again after it tried to assassinate a former Russian agent despite giving him away in a spy swap.

Alex Younger said British spies had to revise their assumptions about Moscow after Skripal was attacked with a deadly nerve agent, in an operation which Britain has pinned on Russia's GRU spy agency.

Younger is the Chief of the Secret Intelligence Service, more commonly known as MI6, and gave a speech to students at St. Andrews University in Scotland, which was reported by the Financial Times.

In the speech, Younger said the UK had partly trusted Russian President Vladimir Putin when Russia pardoned Skripal in 2010 in return for its own agents.

Younger said he and his agents assumed that Moscow's spy swap "had meaning" and would be honored, but he said they revised their opinion in light of the Skripal attack.

He said, according to the Financial Times: "Mr. Skripal came to the UK in an American-brokered exchange, having been pardoned by the president of Russia and, to the extent we assumed that had meaning, that is not an assumption that we will make again."
https://www.businessinsider.com/mi6-head-alex-younger-russia-wont-be-trusted-2018-12?r=UK&IR=T

So I can guess M:I-6 job interviews are kind of like that? Or maybe it’s like Kingsman: The Secret Service, another movie which I am a huge fan of? And speaking of technology how does M:I-6 prepare for the forthcoming technological wars, of which most hated foe Russia, is handling things?

The UK is in a technological arms race with hostile states who are using the tools of the information age to pose existential challenges to Britain’s national security, the head of MI6 warned on Monday.

In a rare speech, Alex Younger said British intelligence agencies had to “innovate faster than they can” as the country’s adversaries turn to cyber-attacks, disguised use of military force, misinformation and political obfuscation to probe and undermine Britain’s institutions and defences.

Though his remarks appeared primarily aimed at Russia, Younger also admitted there are emerging issues over China’s dominant position in the development of game-changing new technologies.

“Power, money and politics [are] going east ... it is all getting more complicated.”

Delivering only his second speech since he became “C” four years ago at the Secret Intelligence Service (SIS), Younger attempted to set out how the threat to the UK has evolved in recent years, and how his agency, which has always had agent recruitment and handling at the core of its work, is having to adapt fast.
https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2018/dec/03/uk-is-in-technological-arms-race-with-its-foes-warns-mi6-chief

And that is a good question, sir! Why not stay dead? Well here’s the thing when discussing spies and spy technology, it’s probably best not to underestimate what they’re currently capable of, since we currently have spy technology available right in our very own pockets!

The head of MI6 will on Monday highlight the urgent need for a new era of spying in which artificial intelligence and robotics are deployed to combat rogue states hellbent on “perpetual confrontation” with the UK.

In a rare public speech - only his second in four years in the job - Alex Younger, the Chief of MI6, will say that Britain must enter an age of “fourth generation espionage” to keep the country safe.

The MI6 boss - known as "C" - will also emphasise the importance of "strengthening" Britain’s security ties with European allies ahead of Brexit, pointing out that "multiple" Islamic State-inspired attacks on the Continent have been disrupted thanks to the co-operation of intelligence agencies.

The speech to students at St Andrew’s University, where Mr Younger studied, will also warn of the danger of “adversaries” who are “willing to take advantage” of huge leaps in cyber technology to launch attacks on Britain “in ways that fall short of traditional warfare”.
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/12/02/chief-mi6-calls-new-era-spying-using-ai-robots-combat-rogue/

But when it comes to the spy game, Trump is about to do something absolutely terrifying and if you’re not alarmed about this prospect, as I have seen just about every spy movie made in the last 5 years and I know what happens when you get names of agents leaked out in the open! Yeah it ends extremely horribly and Trump is going to do it!

British intelligence chiefs are reportedly desperate to convince the White House not to declassify more of the FBI wiretap application on former Trump campaign advisor Carter Page, because it would expose intelligence-gathering sources and methods.

According to a piece published late Wednesday in the U.K.’s Daily Telegraph, U.S. intelligence officials are also against the idea, as are those in Australia, another member of the intelligence-gathering club known as the Five Eyes (the group also includes Canada and New Zealand.)

Carter Page became a foreign policy advisor on Trump’s campaign team early in 2016. The FBI obtained a warrant to monitor his communications several months later, after they became aware that he may have been meeting with Russian officials in Moscow in mid-2016.

Over time, the investigation fed into the sprawling Russia probe that is currently being conducted by Special Counsel Robert Mueller. However, it did not spark the Russia probe, as some Republicans have alleged — the wider investigation was instead prompted by contact between the Russians and Trump campaign aide George Papadopoulos, regarding so-called “dirt” on Trump’s presidential rival, Hillary Clinton.
http://fortune.com/2018/11/22/mi6-trump-carter-page-fbi/

[font size="6"]Score Card [/font]

Overall importance: A
How Things Are Going: B+
Likely hood To Survive: B+

Overall: B+

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

For our season finale we’re going back to Washington, DC to discuss one of the most hated of all government agencies – the IRS! Yes, we came all this way just to make an IRS joke!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Slash Feat Myles Kennedy & The Conspirators[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen my next guest has a great new album called “Living The Dream”, you can see them live Feb 19th at The Dome at Doncaster and Feb 20th at Eventim Apollo. Playing their song “Driving Rain”, give it up for Slash feat Myles Kennedy & The Conspirators!

Thank you London! This was a blast! I hope to come back next year! Thanks to the 99 Club and to the Liberal Dem party for brining us over here. We are back home next week for our final Top 10 of 2018. See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: 99 Club Leicester Square, London, UK
Special Thanks To: 99 Club Management, UK Liberal Democrat party
Holy Shit Gospel Choir:
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
Slash Appears Courtesy Of: Roadrunner Records
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: [email protected]

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

December 5, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-22: The Art Of The Squeal Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-22: The Art Of The Squeal Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! ! Sign up today and get four free phones and our best unlimited plan on the super fast nationwide 4G LTE network! Yeah, I cant wait to get a Samsung Galaxy J7… said nobody ever. Those shitty phones are free for a reason. I kind of feel bad that we're doing an edition today since it is the funeral for former president Bush, which we will get to in full next week from London, but I do have bills to pay and theater owners to make money. Now on with the show. Do we have time for the thing today? Yeah so there's some places where you just don't use your phone. You know what one of those places is? A Broadway theater. Yup it's about him. I know we talk about Kanye a lot on this program because he is just straight up batshit crazy, but he and Kim were at the debut of a new play that opened on Broadway over the weekend called "The Cher Show" which is about the early days of the Sonny & Cher Show. Well, Kanye had his face buried in his iPhone - whether or not he changed his password is anybody's guess - but it definitely put a bad taste in the mouths of the performers. Yeah so don't be like Kanye. But my favorite part of this story is that during the show, there was one of the performers - Jarrod Specter - who publicly called out Kanye for not paying attention to the performance on stage with this tweet. Can we throw that up there?

https://twitter.com/jarrodspector/status/1069753066033987584

Well the funny thing is that uber-Cher fan Kim took to twitter because she couldn't contain her joy for the show. At least Kanye apologized for the comment but still... yeah don't be like Ye. If there's a live performance happening in front of you, at least have the courtesy to turn your phone off. OK that’s enough of the intro, we have a lot of idiocy to get to this week. But first we have to play SNL’s brilliant intro from last week that features Alec Baldwin and his famous Trump impression:

Holy shit!!!! Mueller really dropped the big one this week and it’s so huge that we’re going to have to devote the first two slots to it. The first slot is that Paul Manafort, Jerome Corsi, and Michael Cohen (1) are all wrapped up in the art of the squeal. In the second slot is a missing piece of the puzzle and that’s Trump’s close friend Jeffrey Epstein (2) just landed himself a whole bunch of sexual assault charges and may land a prison cell next to Kevin Spacey. In the third slot we’re going to add a new person to the growing list of people who somehow got elected and that’s Mississippi’s new senator Cindy Hyde Smith (3), and well, it is Mississippi. For the fourth slot I really have to talk about one of our favorite crazy alt right people, Laura Loomer (4) and her epic meltdown in front of the Twitter headquarters demanding her account back. And they have the nerve to call us snowflakes? In the 5th slot this week is our weekly investigative piece, Top 10 Investigates (5), and this week we’re going to take a look at addiction, and a burgeoning new industry of video game rehab. Yes, the kids are playing too much Fortnite, and that could potentially be a problem. In the number 5 slot this week, is our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” (6) and this week, it’s the first week of December so you know what that means: it’s War On Christmas time! Our resident pastor will help you draw your battle lines! For the seventh slot this week we’ve got a new installment of “How Is This Still A Thing”. Did you know that South Carolina has made repeated attempts to secede from the union in the last 3 years? How is this still a thing? Taking the 8th slot this week we’ve got a new installment of our new segment that we debuted last week called “NO!”. We’ve got talk about Melania’s taste in decorating for the White House this week, and yeah. NO!!! For the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week we’re going to go with “I Need A Drink” and we will definitely need a few drinks to help decide the feud between hip hop prodigy Travis Scott and Motley Crue bad boy Tommy Lee. Finally this week our ongoing series that explains how government works to your Trump loving friends and relatives, Deep State Diaries, is going to get into the intelligence game as we hang with the CIA! Finally this week I cannot wait to have this next guest on, who is playing at the nearby Palladium, oh hey, tomorrow night! And that is the great Nine Inch Nails, yay!!!! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]The Trump Trifecta: Manafort, Corsi, Cohen
[br] [/font] [br]

Whew, just like when you get that “World’s Greatest Whatever” coffee mug from Amazon, we must very carefully and slowly unpack this one. For it is quite the tangled web that Trump has woven and the more you delve into it, the more it is like the popcorn packaging peanuts that accompany that said coffee mug – they will get everywhere. First Mueller nails batshit crazy conspiracy theorist Jerome Corsi, then he and Michael Cohen attempt to cut a plea bargain, and Paul Manafort learns the art of the squeal.

OK I love that one! Yeah it might finally be time to start comparing Donald Trump to George Bluth. I mean they both built buildings in forbidden countries. They both have crazy, elaborate families that have a lust for excess. And none of them really contribute anything of value to society! But you know Trump is a mob boss, and like all mob bosses, they got to have a fixer. But would you really have Michael Cohen as your fixer?

Of all of President Trump’s former associates who have come under scrutiny in the special counsel’s Russia investigation, his former personal lawyer, Michael D. Cohen, has undertaken perhaps the most surprising and risky legal strategy.

Mr. Cohen has twice pleaded guilty in federal court in Manhattan to a litany of crimes, and he has volunteered information to the special counsel and other agencies investigating Mr. Trump and his inner circle. He did all this without first obtaining a traditional, ironclad deal under which the government would commit to seeking leniency on Mr. Cohen’s behalf when he is sentenced on Dec. 12.

Mr. Cohen has concluded that his life has been utterly destroyed by his relationship with Mr. Trump and his own actions, and to begin anew he needed to speed up the legal process by quickly confessing his crimes and serving any sentence he receives, according to his friends and associates, and analysis of documents in the case.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/12/03/nyregion/michael-cohen-trump-strategy.html

Yeah Robert DeNiro even looks like Trump in this one, but considering their feud right now I think Trump would object to that one. But how does conspiracy theorist Jerome Corsi fit into this whole thing? He’s the republican equivalent of the late great Stan Lee, you can find him making a cameo in nearly every scandal!

Before Donald Trump became Commander-in-Chief, powerful politicians used to let other people disparage the truth and attack critics on their behalf. Jerome Corsi was one of those other people, an artist of the dog whistle and I’m-just-asking-the-question routines, who electrified viewers of Fox News and listeners of Rush Limbaugh by saying the kinds of grotesque falsehoods that senators and congressmen dared not. Corsi first made his name by swift-boating John Kerry, during the 2004 Presidential campaign, but he hit the right-wing big time with the rise of Barack Obama. In 2008, he published a best-selling book called “The Obama Nation”—say it quickly—a canonical text for those who considered Obama “a corrupt, enraged, anti-American, drug-dealing, anti-Israel, pseudo-Christian radical leftist, black militant, plagiarist, and liar, trained as a Muslim and mentored by a menagerie of Marxists, Communists, crypto-Communists, and terrorists,” as Hendrik Hertzberg put it when the book was published. After Obama won the Presidency, Corsi became a guiding light of the birther movement, whose members insisted that Obama had been born somewhere other than the U.S., and was thus disqualified from serving as President—the same racist, denialist movement that Trump himself goosed to great effect as a precursor to his 2016 Presidential run.

Corsi, who is seventy-two and has a doctorate in political science from Harvard—and therefore likes “Ph.D.” to appear after his name—is now enmeshed in the special counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation of possible ties between Trump’s Presidential campaign and the Russian government. Two weeks ago, during one of his regular video live streams, Corsi announced that he expected to be indicted for giving false information to the special counsel. An indictment has yet to materialize, but, this week, after saying that he had rejected a plea deal, Corsi made public a draft court filing that outlined the allegations Mueller was prepared to make about him.
https://www.newyorker.com/news/current/jerome-corsis-baffling-cameo-in-the-trump-russia-story

Well… speaking of ratting on your friends, rather than face indictment, President T not only decided to rat on his friends, he threw them under the bus! Yeah that’s the kind of stand up guy that Trump is – suck up to him and he’ll be great to you, but double cross him and you’ll get the cement shoes! We may have to explore this topic more next week.

President Trump called Monday for his former attorney Michael Cohen to serve a “full and complete” sentence, weighing in on the fate of a onetime loyalist who is arguing that he does not deserve prison time for the criminal charges to which he has pleaded guilty.

“You mean he can do all of the TERRIBLE, unrelated to Trump, things having to do with fraud, big loans, Taxis, etc., and not serve a long prison term?” Trump said in morning tweets. “He makes up stories to get a GREAT & ALREADY reduced deal for himself. .?.?. He lied for this outcome and should, in my opinion, serve a full and complete sentence.”

President Trump called Monday for his former attorney Michael Cohen to serve a “full and complete” sentence, weighing in on the fate of a onetime loyalist who is arguing that he does not deserve prison time for the criminal charges to which he has pleaded guilty.

“You mean he can do all of the TERRIBLE, unrelated to Trump, things having to do with fraud, big loans, Taxis, etc., and not serve a long prison term?” Trump said in morning tweets. “He makes up stories to get a GREAT & ALREADY reduced deal for himself. .?.?. He lied for this outcome and should, in my opinion, serve a full and complete sentence.”

An attorney for Cohen declined to comment Monday on the president’s tweets.

In a late-night court filing Friday, attorneys for Cohen wrote that their client was a changed man who was cooperating extensively with special counsel Robert S. Mueller III as well as other prosecutors conducting probes related to Trump and his 2016 campaign.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/trump-says-michael-cohen-deserves-a-full-and-complete-sentence/2018/12/03/e63df19e-f70f-11e8-8d64-4e79db33382f_story.html?utm_term=.1701702e632d

[font size="8"]Jeffrey Epstein
[br] [/font] [br] B

Hey everyone guess what? The Qanon truthers were right! There really is a super secret network of underground elite pedophiles engaged in satanic rituals and human trafficking! Only… it’s not Hillary Clinton and John Podesta. Thank you sound effects guy! That was very well timed! But guess who it really is? It’s Trump’s BFFs Jeffrey Epstein and Alan Dershowitz! Woooooooo!!!!! Wooooo. Well yeah Jeffrey Epstein last week got BUSTED. And here’s what happened.

A last-minute settlement was reached Tuesday in a long-running Florida lawsuit involving a politically connected financier accused of sexually abusing dozens of teenage girls, clearing the way for the victims’ lawyers to try to unravel a once-secret agreement that prevented federal criminal prosecution of the financier.

The non-prosecution agreement protecting Jeffrey Epstein was negotiated a decade ago by prosecutors in the South Florida U.S. attorney’s office, which was then run by current Labor Secretary Alexander Acosta. It is the subject of a separate federal lawsuit in Florida filed by victims who say the deal trampled their rights to be heard.

“That injustice needs to be addressed and will be addressed,” said attorney Jack Scarola, who represents fellow lawyer Bradley Edwards in the lawsuit settled Tuesday. “There is no justification for the broad scope of immunity that was granted.”
https://www.politico.com/story/2018/12/04/jeffrey-epstein-settles-suit-testimony-1043176

Yes damn!!! Of course you know what will make it all better? An apology! I mean just ask OJ Simpson and Trump how well apologies work. And this is 2018, no one should have to apologize to anyone, unless you consider a death threat on Twitter an apology. So just how far back does this alleged abuse go?

President Trump won’t be testifying, though lawyers in the case tried to depose him. President Bill Clinton won’t be there either, though he, like Trump, was an occasional guest of the man at the center of the trial, billionaire sex criminal Jeffrey Epstein.

Don’t expect to find Labor Secretary Alexander Acosta in the courtroom in West Palm Beach, Fla., though his decision not to prosecute Epstein was a milestone in the twisting path toward the courtroom showdown that is finally supposed to begin Tuesday after nearly nine years of byzantine bickering.

Even Epstein himself, the prime figure in the legal battle, isn’t expected to show up; he’ll deliver his version of this epic by affidavit. Though the trial mainly will feature battalions of lawyers fighting over the actions of another set of lawyers, the case could offer a window into a sordid saga of sexual exploitation that includes many big names in American politics.

The ostensible focus of the trial is whether lawyers representing alleged victims of Epstein’s decades-long obsession with underage girls ginned up accusations of sexual molestation as part of an illegal scheme to lure investors.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/national/palm-beach-trial-could-reveal-details-of-billionaires-alleged-abuse-of-teen-girls/2018/12/03/f42e0c4e-f4d0-11e8-bc79-68604ed88993_story.html?utm_term=.e0175ee45f3e

And just like Trump’s alleged abuse of women , Jeffrey Epstein had amassed a huge network of girls at his disposal. I mean Trump really sure can pick ‘em, can’t he? You know what? Why don’t we ask him?

Oh oh!!! He just walked off stage! Mr Trump has left the building! Even he won’t touch that one. Yeah, and let’s all assume how gross that last sentence is. And by the way what is his connection to Trump?

Florida’s Democratic members of Congress are demanding an investigation into what led to the slap-on-the-wrist punishment for Jeffrey Epstein, a wealthy Palm Beach resident accused of sexually abusing dozens of teenage girls.

The agreement that prevented federal prosecution of Epstein was overseen by Alexander Acosta, who was the U.S. attorney for the southern district of Florida at the time and is currently President Donald Trump’s secretary of labor.

The members of Congress want an investigation by the inspector general at the Department of Justice.

“Based on newly-reported documents and a group of brave women coming forward to share their stories, it appears that, as a federal prosecutor, Labor Secretary Alex Acosta gave a sweetheart deal to a wealthy and well-connected serial sex offender, and hid it from dozens of victims, some of whom were still coming forward,” U.S. Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, D-Weston, said by email. “The American people and the victims of these horrific crimes deserve to know why justice was not served in this disturbing case, and the lack of transparency still cloaking it is very troubling.”
https://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/politics/fl-ne-jeffrey-epstein-alex-acosta-investigation-20181204-story.html

Yeah I’m sure that Trump is giving the thumbs up to this. And what’s even more bizarre? His lawyer is neck deep in this scandal! Yeah that might not be the best choice of words. But really we’ll keep an eye on this developing scandal and report back once the dems finish their findings.

Lawyer Alan Dershowitz has said that he still represents convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, who pleaded guilty to soliciting underage sexual partners whom he initially recruited as masseurs. Dershowitz, 80, told Axios that Epstein “has called me a couple of times about legal issues, because I’m still technically his lawyer,” adding, “I haven’t had any social, or any other kind of contact [but] you never stop being a person’s lawyer.” Dershowitz told Axios that Epstein lent his family his Palm Beach, Florida, house and that he received a “therapeutic massage with an old old Russian” there, but he’d had no idea “anything improper had even taken place in that house.” While he was allegedly raping teenage girls, Epstein cultivated relationships with a global elite: Bill Clinton flew on Epstein’s plane, nicknamed the “Lolita Express,” numerous times; Prince Andrew’s ex-wife borrowed money from him; and Donald Trump praised him as a “terrific guy.”
https://www.thedailybeast.com/alan-dershowitz-yes-i-am-still-jeffrey-epsteins-lawyer

[font size="8"]Cindy Hyde Smith
[br] [/font] [br

Politicians at the state and local levels who are so toxic, you wonder how they are able to get elected, much less stay elected. This is:

This week – Mississippi’s new senator Cindy Hyde Smith. In an era where racists are claiming that the racial wall was torn down when Obama got elected and racism is dying out with old age, Cindy Hyde Smith not only rebuilt the wall, but put barbed wire and an electrical current on it. In fact, Ms. Smith is so toxic in her racism and underlying sexism that many of her major donors have asked her to return their donations in wake of the scandal.

Major League Baseball is requesting the return of its $5,000 donation to Sen. Cindy Hyde-Smith’s campaign, in the latest blow to the Mississippi Republican ahead of Tuesday’s runoff.

MLB spokesman Pat Courtney said in a statement that the donation “was made in connection with an event that MLB lobbyists were asked to attend” and that MLB has requested that it be returned.

Melissa Scallan, a spokeswoman for Hyde-Smith’s campaign, said she could not comment on the matter.

News of the donation was first reported Saturday by the political newsletter Popular Information.

Hyde-Smith, who was appointed to the Senate in the spring, faces Democrat Mike Espy in Tuesday’s runoff to fill the remaining two years of the term to which retired Republican Thad Cochran was elected.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/mlb-asks-cindy-hyde-smith-to-return-5000-donation-report-says/2018/11/25/57d70318-f0cb-11e8-bc79-68604ed88993_story.html?utm_term=.814e16be1a31

But that didn’t stop the owner of the San Francisco Giants from making a donation to the controversial new senator from Mississippi. So he supports racism and that earned a lot of criticism from an otherwise progressive city.

Charles B. Johnson, the retired investment-company billionaire believed to hold one of the largest stakes in the San Francisco Giants, is attracting attention for the second time in two months over a political campaign contribution.

According to a federal election filing Wednesday, Johnson and his wife, Ann, each donated the maximum $2,700 to the campaign of Cindy Hyde-Smith, a Republican U.S. Senator from Mississippi who faces Democrat and former U.S. Agriculture Secretary Mike Espy in a runoff Tuesday for the final Senate seat to be decided in the 2018 midterm elections.

Hyde-Smith has been under fire from opponents since Nov. 11, when a video at a campaign rally in Tupelo surfaced that showed her expressing her regards for a local rancher by saying, “If he invited me to a public hanging, I’d be on the front row.”

Her comments have become a major campaign issue because of Mississippi’s notorious history of African Americans being lynched. Although Hyde-Smith apologized in a statement and during a Tuesday debate with Espy, who is African American, she also said her comments were in jest and being “twisted” by political opponents.

Since the video surfaced, Hyde-Smith also was captured on video saying it would be a good idea to make it harder for some college students to vote. A 2014 photo of Hyde-Smith donning a Confederate hat has created controversy in Mississippi as well.
https://www.sfchronicle.com/giants/article/Giants-owner-Charles-Johnson-donates-to-13416942.php

Yes that is true. But just how racist and hateful is Cindy Hyde Smith? Even her apology was racist and you can’t apologize for being racist while saying something racist. It doesn’t quite work that way. Seriously, her comments were too racist for Wal-Mart, and when you’re too racist for Wal-Mart, that’s pretty fucking racist.

Walmart tweeted Tuesday that it is withdrawing its support and “requesting a refund of all campaign donations” from Mississippi Senator Cindy Hyde-Smith after the Republican lawmaker “joked” about public lynchings, restricting voter’s rights for liberal college students—and then defended the comments. And other corporate donors are joining the retail giant’s request for a refund.

Hyde-Smith, who was appointed to her position by Gov. Phil Bryant last March, faces public scrutiny after a campaign stop last month in which she stated in front of rolling cameras that if a local rancher she’d met “invited me to a public hanging, I’d be on the front row.”

Her comment was particularly jarring given the fact that Hyde-Smith, who is Caucasian, is currently campaigning for a Nov. 27 run-off against former Democratic Congressman and U.S. agriculture secretary Mike Espy, who is black.

Mississippi has a pronounced history of racism and violence. According to the NAACP, Mississippi had the highest number of recorded lynchings between 1882–1968, hanging 581 black people.
http://fortune.com/2018/11/20/walmart-aks-cindy-hyde-smith-for-campaign-donations-back/

?itemid=5114632

Seriously, yes it was. But despite the toxic comments guess what? Trump campaigned for Ms. Smith, and she handily won the election against Bob Espy. So yes, Ms. Smith will lead the Mississippi senate for the next two years. Because, racism is still alive and well in Mississippi.

Senator Cindy Hyde-Smith, a Mississippi Republican who had to apologize for a cavalier reference to a public hanging, won a special runoff election on Tuesday, defeating the Democratic candidate, Mike Espy, who was trying to become the state’s first black senator since Reconstruction.

Ms. Hyde-Smith’s victory, reported by The Associated Press, came in the final Senate race of the midterm elections and will set the Republican majority in the chamber at 53 to 47 once the new Congress is sworn in, a net pickup of two seats.

The matchup between Mr. Espy and Ms. Hyde-Smith drew national scrutiny as a test of Mississippi’s past and present attitudes on race and its standing as a conservative bulwark, especially after the senator’s gaffe that she would be willing to attend a “public hanging.’’
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/27/us/politics/mississippi-senate-espy-hyde-smith.html

That’s true. That is Mississippi senator Cindy Hyde Smith, another one of the ever growing list of:

[font size="8"]The Alt Right
[br] [/font] [br]

Allow me to engage in a bit of schadenfreude here, but is anyone else just LOVING watching the Alt Right implode? It seems being a racist dick is becoming passé. You know last week I reported on how the Alt Right fight club known as the Proud Boys, was losing its’ charm as a bunch of drunk , Trump loving dickheads who loved to pick fights with Antifa after Gavin McInnes left the group but now the group has been working to “reclaim” its image!

Gavin McInnes, the founder of the far-right group Proud Boys, has been denied an Australian visa after failing his “character test.”

McInnes was supposed to go to Australia for a tour of the Deplorables, a conservative comedy series, with British right-wing activist Tommy Robinson.

“Over half our support in recent months has come from Australia. We’re coming to say ‘thank you,’” the tour website reads. The tour is scheduled to be from Feb. 1 to Feb. 10.

Sydney-based SBS News reported last week that protesters demonstrated in the Australian capital Canberra to demand that McInnes’ visa be canceled. But a later report claimed his visa application was rejected. It is not clear if McInnes had a visa approved initially.

The Australian Broadcasting Company reported that McInnes had been notified a few weeks ago that his visa would be blocked, and his window to file for an appeal closed on Friday.
https://www.dailydot.com/irl/proud-boys-founder-gavin-mcinnes-australian-visa/

Yes, ha ha indeed! Meet the new, friendlier Proud Boys - we're the same as the old douchey Proud Boys now with 75% less felony assault charges! But that wasn’t the only alt right news last week, this might be one of my favorite stories of the year. Laura Loomer, who suffers from an extreme case of Democrat Derangement Syndrome, might need some help. Yeah I am sure you saw this story last week, let’s tell you more!

In response to getting kicked off Twitter, far-right activist Laura Loomer chained herself to the platform's Manhattan headquarters on Thursday.

Livestream video posted to Periscope captured Loomer handcuffed to the glass doors leading into the headquarters. It didn't take long before a crowd and police gathered and the street was closed off.

At its peak, the Periscope livestream had almost 10,000 viewers.

"It's almost as if Twitter hates Jews and conservatives," Loomer said during her protest. "When is [Twitter CEO] Jack Dorsey going to stop censoring conservatives? When am I going to get my Twitter back? I'll be here as long as it takes."

Loomer ended her stand shortly after 6 p.m., when she asked police to cut off her handcuffs after a little more than two hours of protest.
https://www.businessinsider.com/lara-loomer-chained-herself-twitter-hq-after-banned-2018-11

You know what, Laura? If you don’t want to be pegged as a racist lunatic, don’t show up to Twitter headquarters screaming about free speech wearing racist symbols! I mean come on! And by the way, one of the favorite talking points of the Alt Right has always been that racism is dying out with older generations. Well guess what? This story out of Dover High School in Dover, New Hampshire will definitely change some minds!

Students at Dover High School in New Hampshire were recorded in class singing a KKK-themed jingle sparking a district investigation. Dover School District Superintendent William Harbron told NBC News on Monday that the students were 11th-graders assigned to create a jingle based on the post-Civil War Reconstruction era for a U.S. history class. The Ku Klux Klan, a white supremacist organization, was formed in this time period.

Video began to circulate of the presentation Friday in which students sang, "White masks on our heads, blood beneath our feet, laughing till they’re dead -- ha, ha, ha," to the tune of "Jingle Bells." The students did not know they were being recorded, the superintendent said.

"The principal became aware of the situation late Friday and began working with (the) teacher," Harbron told NBC News on Monday. "Right now we’re dealing the immediate need of communication out and dealing with the emotions surrounding the situation." The district released a letter on Monday stating that it was investigating the incident and that although the song was part of an assignment, "the impact was harmful."

"Administration from Dover High School and the District are working with students and the school community to respond immediately and effectively to this racial insensitivity. I think the most important part is that we are upset and concerned about what happened in that classroom," Harbron said.

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/video-new-hampshire-students-singing-kkk-themed-jingle-sparks-district-n943246

Yes that escalated quickly all right! And while we’re on the subject of the Alt Right and racism, one of the darlings of the alt right is going broke at an alarming rate. Oh won’t somebody please think of poor Milo Yiannopolous? Please??? Well many of us are giving a fine “womp womp” to this douche.

The far right activist Milo Yiannopoulos was more than $2m in debt during 2018, according to a collection of documents assembled by his former Australian tour promoters and seen by Guardian Australia. Creditors listed in the documents include employees of his company, a wedding venue and his former sponsors, the billionaire Mercer family.

The documents indicate that as of April 2018, Yiannopoulos owed $1.6m to his own company, $400,000 to the Mercers, $153,215 to his former lawyers, $76,574 to former collaborator and Breitbart writer Allum Bokhari, and $20,000 to the luxury jewellery brand Cartier.

As of 2 October, Yiannopoulos owed sums of several thousand dollars to far right writers including Ian Miles Cheong, anti-Islamic ideologue Pamela Geller and science fiction writer Theodore Beale, aka Vox Day, the documents indicate, amongst others.

They were published on the website of an Australian far right figure and United Patriots Front member, Neil Erikson, infamous for subjecting the former senator Sam Dastyari to a torrent of racial abuse in a Sydney pub.
https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2018/dec/03/milo-yiannopoulos-more-than-2m-in-debt-australian-promoters-documents-show

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Video Game Rehab
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

There’s a new 21st century problem that is requiring a 21st century solution. That problem is that children are becoming increasingly addicted to video games. Which is why a new industry has spawned: video game rehab. While rehab for video game addiction is nothing new, with the advent of portable devices like the Nintendo Switch, tablets, and cell phones, children these days can and will be playing games 24 hours a day. Here’s more:

Parents chalking up their kids' distracted and compulsive behavior to playing video games is a story as old as Atari, or arcades, or whatever you consider to be your stand-in symbol for gaming in its infancy. But apparently the pull of Fortnite is so strong that some parents have gone the very desperate route of sending their kids to rehab in order to get them to put their controllers/keyboards down once in a freaking while, and not for the first time either.

One such parent who was recently profiled by Gadgets 360 was Michigan mother Debbie Vitany, who says her 17-year-old son (Carson) logs 12-hours a day in Epic Games' virtual battlefields. She says that this unhealthy time allotment has caused him to get bad grades and fall asleep in class (as most 12-hour per day obsessions will do). "We'd made some progress in getting him to cut down his Fortnite hours and get better sleep, but he's slipped back into his old habits," Vitany said. "I've never seen a game that has such control over kids' minds."

Lorrine Marer, who is a "British behavioral specialist who works with kids battling game addiction" even went so far as to compare the game to heroin, which is actually not the first time health experts have made this connection, though you probably wouldn't know for sure unless you both played Fortnite and did heroin.
https://www.complex.com/life/2018/12/fortnite-addiction-has-parents-sending-kids-to-video-game-rehab

Yes, 12 hours a day on one game. It can’t be that good can it? Well for chronic addicts it may never get any easier but that’s what happens when a game gets you complete control over ones’ mind. Now it’s all well and good but what does a professional Fortnite player think?

Fortnite has consistently remained in the spotlight since its release last July, but this week it headlined on Bloomberg for less than stellar reasons. To be specific, young players were being sent to rehab to tackle their Fortnite addictions.

Fortnite has been a massive hit with younger audiences, but this success has made it a high profile target for concerned parents. This is far from the first time parental discourse has focused in on a particular subject, with everything from the entire breed of pit bulls to the Grand Theft Auto trilogy having fallen under similar crosshairs before. Gaming addiction itself has always been a hot topic for parents, so it should come as no surprise that Fortnite pops up frequently when such concerns are raised.

Popular Fortnite streamer Ninja – who earns about $500,000 per month streaming the title – took issue with the aforementioned Bloomberg article. He places the blame for young players being addicted to the game firmly on the parents who let their children run rampant with playtime. The Bloomberg article quotes one mother whose son spends 12 hours a day playing Fortnite, a number that simply isn’t healthy regardless of one’s age. It also helps drive home Ninja’s point, which is that parents have a responsibility to manage how their children spend free time. It’s easy to hand a child a phone to keep them pacified, but it’s less easy to proactively manage them during these important developmental years.
https://gamerant.com/fortnite-ninja-addiction-report/

Well sure, the guy who plays Fortnite for a living and calls himself “Ninja” is your go to expert on addiction, of course he’s going to be against it! But they’re not “landing” into video game rehab, no, if you listen to our media on this subject, kids are being FORCED into rehab! Because that sounds so much better doesn’t it? Even professional athletes can’t stay away from the game!

Professional athletes are getting hooked, too. The National Hockey League’s Vancouver Canucks had so much trouble getting players to meetings and dinners they banned Fortnite on the road. David Price, star pitcher for Major League Baseball’s World Series-winning Boston Red Sox, was scratched from a May start against the arch rival New York Yankees because of wrist problems that may have been exacerbated by Fortnite playing.

Some pro-baseball players are so Fortnite-obsessed that they’ve hooked the game up to their stadium’s Jumbotron video system to play it while waiting to take batting practice.

Randy Kulman, a child psychologist in Wakefield, Rhode Island, has seen a surge in parents taking their kids to counseling because of video-game addictions.

“I had a 13-year-old in my office who said he had 300 Fortnite wins,” Kulman said. “I had to stop for a minute and calculate what he had to invest just to get those.”

Michael Jacobus, who runs the Reset Summer Camp for kids with addictions, said about 60 percent of the 120 children he counseled at camps in Santa Barbara, California, and Asheville, North Carolina, last summer were playing Fortnite excessively. Treatment involves a technology detox — their devices are taken away — combined with healthy eating, sleep and group therapy. Next summer, he plans to enroll more than twice as many kids, with additional locations in Texas, Indiana and New York.
http://www.timesonline.com/entertainmentlife/20181204/tech-addiction-video-game-fortnite-is-forcing-kids-into-video-game-rehab

And not only that, getting those wins in that game costs money. But one thing you should never do when your kids are spending too much time in front of their screens is blame the parents. No, it’s not their fault for their children’s addictive personalities. But how much do you blame the game for the monetary aspect of it?

Video gamers might have a spending problem.

With the exponential rise in popularity in games such as Fortnite and Overwatch, many video games have introduced loot boxes and microtransactions – avenues for players to spend real money to unlock virtual weapons, boosts and costumes.

Loot boxes award in-game upgrades such as new skins for characters, new maps, items or player boosts, often at a cost. Loot boxes have become common fixtures within the individual economies of video games – yes, today's video games have their own built-in economies.

Fortnite, one of the most popular games worldwide, generated $318 million in revenue in May despite being a free-to-play game. A recent Juniper Research report expects the digital game industry to exceed $160 billion via in-game spending by 2022.
https://www.ydr.com/story/news/local/2018/11/29/what-loot-box-microtransaction-egames-fortnite-fifa-league-legends-fut-coins-riot-points-ftc-esports/2140904002/

So if your children are spending that much money to be able to play a game that’s supposedly free, just how much money did Epic Games make last year? The answer will absolutely shock you!

Fortnite: Battle Royale has brought in more revenue in a single month than any other game of its kind. The free-to-play game hit a new revenue record of $318 million in May, according to SuperData Research.

That puts Fornite well ahead of other breakout games like Pokémon Go and Clash of Clans, and it’s all the more spectacular when you realize the multi-platform game launched on consoles just eight months ago and on iOS just three months ago.

Since then, Fortnite has brought in more than $1.2 billion in revenue, all of which comes from nonessential in-app purchases, for stuff like clothing and dance moves.
https://www.recode.net/2018/6/26/17502072/fortnite-revenue-game-growth-318-million

There you have it, Fortnite is playing with our children’s sanity while the company that prodiuces the game is pocketing $300 million. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

My fair congregation! There is a war brewing among us! And unlike most wars, this war only comes once a year, usually around this time of year. Yes, I am referring of course, to the annual War On Christmas, of course the republican right has trademarked the word Christmas and we on the left are required to pay royalties every time we use it. Yeah seriously!

It’s that time of year, and the festive annual tradition of Religious Right hand-wringing about a supposed “War on Christmas” is getting underway. This week Liberty Counsel launched its annual “Friend or Foe Christmas Campaign” and released this year’s “Naughty and Nice” list of retailers that the group judges on the nature of their holiday promotions.

In an old video Liberty Counsel retweeted on Tuesday, Liberty Counsel President Mat Staver decried “attempts to remove Christ from Christmas” and warned that “every year the battle intensifies.” The Religious Right’s “War on Christmas” narrative, amplified by right-wing media personalities on Fox and elsewhere, has been part of the attempt to boost conservative evangelicals’ political engagement by convincing them that they are under assault in American culture.

On Monday, Liberty Counsel sent out a press release with a link to this year’s Naughty and Nice list, which, while ridiculous, is revealing about the kind of country Liberty Counsel wants America to be—one in which the cultural hegemony of its brand of Christianity is upheld and enforced, even by secular institutions like Burlington Coat Factory.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/religious-right-gears-up-annual-war-on-christmas-attack-on-pluralism/

Oh not Burlington Coat Factory! That’s where us preachers shop. Oh sure, sir, maybe on your salary you can afford to shop at Nordstrom but us preachers have to resort to much… thriftier stores. But this year in the War on Christmas, there’s even more stores who are getting poor ratings for not supporting the baby JAYSUS enough!

Companies can make it onto Liberty Counsel’s “naughty” list even if they are selling Christmas-themed products, or advertising with universally recognized symbols of Christmas traditions like Santa Claus and reindeer.

For example, Liberty Counsel notes that Lord and Taylor incorporates Christmas language in its products and marketing. “However,” Liberty Counsel complains, “the company, like many others, falls short of portraying what the Christmas season is about. Their reindeers and printed Santas hide the love of the Nativity and reason for gift giving.”

Similarly, Liberty Counsel criticizes Burlington Coat Factory for its “severe lack of Christmas advertising with biblical meaning.” Liberty Counsel complains, “Each ad or marketing concept starts strong with Christmas-themed products but loses meaning through emphasis on giving and receiving.” We’re explicitly talking about retail advertising; why wouldn’t their emphasis be on giving and receiving?

Then there’s Dick’s Sporting Goods. “This sports store ignores the most important Gift of Christmas,” says Liberty Counsel, urging people to contact the retailer “to encourage the organization to include Christ in their ‘Christmas’ seasonal marketing plan.” Is it really the job of a sporting goods store to promote Christian teachings about the birth of Jesus?
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/religious-right-gears-up-annual-war-on-christmas-attack-on-pluralism/

I think even the good LAWRD JAYSUS is saying “seriously, get a fucking life, guys!”. But this probably is their only life. I mean really these are the people who support the Dark One, whose name shall not be named in my church. But this year in their supposed “war on Christmas”, the supporters of the Dark One think that they somehow have a monopoly on the holiday. I mean did it ever leave in the 8 years that Obama was in the White House?

Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke saluted President Donald Trump on Wednesday night as “the man who brought Christmas back to America.”

That had Twitter users wondering: Just where did Christmas go?

Zinke’s introduction was actually recycled; he made a remarkably similar comment at last year’s tree-lighting ceremony, calling Trump “the man who brought ‘Merry Christmas!’ back to our nation’s capital.”

Neither Christmas nor “Merry Christmas” have ever left.

Yet it has been a talking point for Trump since early in the campaign and one he has mentioned repeatedly ― and often randomly, including in July ― even as president.

Here is some of the reaction to Trump being hailed for saving a holiday that was never in peril:
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/ryan-zinke-donald-trump-merry-christmas_us_5bff6223e4b0864f4f6a05ca

That is a good question, dear LAWRD! By the way , how great is our gospel choir? Give it up for them! By the way, in case you are wondering the numbers, it seems the war on Christmas is no longer a thing! We won ladies and gentlemen! And what should, in no way, shape or form shock you, only the most hardcore supporters of the Dark One are the ones who care about this nonsense!

In a Nov. 1-3 survey among 2,201 U.S. adults, respondents who said they believe there is “too much political correctness” and also said that would shop more at stores that say “Merry Christmas” were more than three times as likely to identify as Republican than as Democrat, 41 percent to 12 percent.

“The issue of ‘War on Christmas’ seems like asymmetrical warfare, in that only one side seems to be fighting it,” said Dan Cox, an independent pollster and former research director and co-founder of the nonpartisan polling firm PRRI.

Every year, the idea that the religious meaning of Christmas is under attack fires up one side of the partisan divide and is largely greeted with apathy by the other, Cox said. These attitudes closely mirror Morning Consult polling conducted last year.
https://morningconsult.com/2018/11/28/christmas-another-sign-partisan-divide-extends-to-culture/

There you have it, nobody cares anymore about the War On Christmas, so why is this still a thing? Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]How Is This Still A Thing?
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time once again to ask:

This week – South Carolina repeatedly attempting to secede from the union – how is this still a thing? In the 150 years since the Civil War began, there’s one state that still refuses to acknowledge that they lost the war and are still part of the United States. That state is South Carolina. While California got all the attention this year for an ill fated attempt to split the state into three smaller states, South Carolina did something unprecedented and off the radar that you probably didn’t expect, but should have. Yes, they managed to find enough representatives who still favor this kind of thing.

South Carolina debated seceding from the Union more than 150 years ago, a decision that ultimately led to the Civil War. Now, the topic has come up again, amid a national debate over firearms and gun rights.

A trio of state House Republicans on Thursday quietly introduced a bill that would allow lawmakers to debate seceding from the U.S. if the federal government confiscates guns purchased in South Carolina.

The bill provides that "the general assembly shall convene to consider whether to secede from the United States based upon the federal government's unconstitutional violation of the Second Amendment to the United States Constitution if the federal government confiscates legally purchased firearms in this state."

The measure sponsored by Reps. Mike Pitts, Jonathon Hill and Ashley Trantham has no real chance this session. The deadline for bills to move from one chamber to the other is April 10.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/south-carolina-state-house-republicans-introduce-bill-on-secession-over-gun-rights/

So South Carolina is obviously more concerned with gun rights than human rights to the point where they feel that they need to leave the United States over it. Yes, let’s just think about that for a minute here. But this isn’t the first time since the Civil War that South Carolina has attempted to secede from the union. In fact they attempt to secede from the union about as many times as Wiley Coyote attempts to catch the road runner.

If South Carolina were to secede from the United States as some officials are threatening to do, it wouldn’t be the first time that state led a secession movement in a quarrel with the federal government.

State lawmakers there are working on a bill that calls for the legislature to consider secession over larger gun rights and possession issues. The legislation states officials would “convene to consider whether to secede from the United States based upon the federal government’s unconstitutional violation of the Second Amendment … if the federal government confiscates legally purchased firearms in this state.”

The bill is still listed as being in the House Judiciary Committee.

Although it’s unclear whether the bill will become a law and whether any nationwide discussion on guns and gun rights will lead to changes at the federal level—or even to an action as advanced as confiscating legally acquired firearms, as the right often claims—the proposed measure echoes previous events in American history.

South Carolina was the first of 11 states to secede at the beginning of the Civil War. Shortly after President Abraham Lincoln was elected from the Republican Party in late 1860, South Carolina voted to secede.
https://www.newsweek.com/south-carolina-secession-history-state-attempts-secede-slaves-guns-877933

But in case you’re wondering, no, South Carolina doesn’t plan to quit any time soon. In fact they’re doubling down. They don’t take this sort of thing lightly, you know! But seriously you have to wonder what their best intentions are in this. Oh wait, they’re putting guns above people. They can’t have that good of intentions, can they?

Three conservative state lawmakers want South Carolina prepped to secede from the Union — again.

They’ve sponsored a bill requiring South Carolina lawmakers to consider secession if the federal government “confiscates legally purchased firearms.”

The bill by Reps. Mike Pitts, R-Laurens; Jonathon Hill, R-Townville; and Ashley Trantham, R-Greenville, has absolutely no chance of becoming law this year since there’s only about a month left in the session.

Pitts said he filed the bill to “generate dialogue and debate for next session.”

“That’s a serious bill,” he said. “I certainly don’t take it lightly.”

This isn’t the first time Pitts has offered especially crafted legislation to make a political statement. In 2016, he filed a bill requiring journalists to register with the state government and created fines for those who didn’t.
https://www.postandcourier.com/politics/palmetto-politics-take-my-gun-and-south-carolina-may-secede/article_c51dea50-36a3-11e8-91c9-ebfac52faefd.html

And also in case you’re wondering if they are going to attempt this sort of thing again, the answer is a definite yes, and in fact civil war culture is alive and well and a huge industry in South Carolina. So much that the house where the original plan to secede from the union came about.

If the walls of a 200-year-old Beaufort mansion could talk ....

Upon closer inspection, they can.

On the basement walls where Union troops once likely lined up to receive their pay, they wrote their names and regiment. Someone practiced writing numbers.

A note scrawled on a basement wall and dated Aug. 4, 1862, describes perhaps the most notable activity in this Greek Revival home on Craven Street downtown known as the "Milton Maxcy House" or "Secession House."

"This is Edmund Rhett's house. He had 42 field hands and 12 horses," the note reads in handwritten cursive script. "In this house the first meeting in favor of Secession was held 1851."

In Beaufort, history is always for sale.
https://www.usnews.com/news/best-states/south-carolina/articles/2018-11-17/home-where-southerners-first-hatched-secession-plan-for-sale

So if the home where the first secession took place is up for sale, the home where the 2019 secession will take place won’t be too far behind! That’s enough to make you ask – South Carolina secession:

[font size="8"]White House Christmas Decorations: NO!
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time for our new segment:

It’s Christmas time and once again that means that the White House Christmas decorations are going up, and once again, we are reminded that the Trump family has no taste in anything! Now for a comparison let’s show the decorations from last year. Which hilariously got compared to the decorating schematic on the hit Netflix show “Stranger Things”.

Now let’s show this year’s. Let's show the Christmas decorations. Can we show that for a minute?

For the record, last year's decorations got compared to Stranger Things, this year I would say they're going for a Dexter vibe. Let's call this "Serial Killer Chic". Does blood set Melania's teeth on edge or does it help her control the chaos? I'm just surprised that they're not wrapped in plastic. You could also throw in a little American Horror Story as well.

“Everybody has a different taste,” Melania Trump said this week.

Speaking at a town hall conversation at Liberty University, the first lady was referring to her White House Christmas decorations, which were unveiled in a short video on Monday, and the kerfuffle they caused. Particularly the red topiary trees lining the East Colonnade. The entire nation has come to know the phrase “blood red,” as it became the stuff of late-night monologues.

It turns out taste these days — in Christmas decorations, at least — can be a litmus test for a person’s politics and how they feel about the Trump administration. Not even garland, string lights and candy canes are above partisan squabbling.

Ms. Trump’s decorations, which also included “Be Best” pencil wreaths and tree stands (a nod to her childhood-wellness campaign) as well as gingerbread replicas of the Capitol, the Lincoln Memorial and other national monuments, could be seen as either “stunning” and patriotic (the Washington Times) or “deeply haunted” (The Cut). It was the rare media outlet that played it down the middle, as did Town & Country, which tactfully called the red trees: “Most striking, perhaps.”
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/30/fashion/white-house-christmas-decorations.html

NO!!!! We don’t want blood red Christmas trees. We’re decorating for Christmas here, not the Purge! I mean yeah it’s obvious by now that the Trumps don’t have any taste in anything! Especially when it comes to interior decorating. I mean what was that interior decorator thinking? And are you shocked at her reaction to the reaction to this abomination?

Red is a Christmas color.

So why did Twitter and other social media platforms erupt when First Lady Melania Trump unveiled this year’s White House Christmas trees including 45 that are ruby red?

Amelia Florist Vickie Wenstrup is struggling to find an answer to this question. She was caught off-guard by the social media reaction to the red berry Christmas trees that she and a team of other volunteers labored over for three days.

The reactions were unexpected and "horrible," she said.

"I don't know who first said it. Or why," Wenstrup recalled. "The first thing I saw (on Google) was 'Melania Trump covers the White House in blood for Christmas.'"

Florist who helped with Melania's red Christmas trees floored by 'horrible' reaction
Sheila Vilvens, Cincinnati Enquirer Published 10:25 a.m. ET Nov. 30, 2018 | Updated 12:23 p.m. ET Nov. 30, 2018

So why did Twitter and other social media platforms erupt when First Lady Melania Trump unveiled this year’s White House Christmas trees including 45 that are ruby red?

Amelia Florist Vickie Wenstrup is struggling to find an answer to this question. She was caught off-guard by the social media reaction to the red berry Christmas trees that she and a team of other volunteers labored over for three days.

The reactions were unexpected and "horrible," she said.

"I don't know who first said it. Or why," Wenstrup recalled. "The first thing I saw (on Google) was 'Melania Trump covers the White House in blood for Christmas.'"

More: Melania Trump defends red trees that have Twitter crying 'Handmaid's Tale'

That certainly wasn't how Wenstrup saw the trees which are located in the East Colonnade of the East Wing.

She thought that the design was perhaps inspired by the sculpted and shaped holly topiary trees in the garden that are visible outside the hallway's windows. The garden is one of two designed by former first lady Jacqueline Kennedy, Wenstrup said.

The cranberry tree that adorns the White House Red Room could have also served as an inspiration, she suggested. Whatever the idea's source, it was not Wenstrup's. The first lady's team worked on that.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/people/2018/11/30/melanias-red-christmas-trees-reaction-shocks-decorations-volunteer/2160687002/

Oh come on! You work for the Trump administration, you knew the job was dangerous when you took it, and have you not seen the Trump’s taste in interior decorating? Have you not seen Trump Tower?

I mean come on the only way you could fit more gold in there is if Trump were Goldmember and Goldfinger himself. Oh wait, he kind of is. But Melania is standing by her awful taste in decorating:

Despite all the internet buzz and criticism, First Lady Melania Trump says she stands by her White House Christmas decorations.

In an interview at Liberty University Wednesday as part of a town hall on the opioid crisis, Trump was asked what she has to say about the media’s coverage of her Christmas decorations. “We are in the 21st century and everybody has a different taste,” Trump said. With a smile, she added: “I think they look fantastic.”

The Liberty University audience applauded for the First Lady’s comment before she proceeded by inviting everyone to the White House to see the decorations, which feature numerous Christmas trees including rows of trees in a deep red shade that many joked resembled blood.

“In real life they look even more beautiful, and you are all very welcome to visit the White House — the ‘people’s house,'” she said.

The First Lady raised similar critiques with her 2017 decorations. Strongly resembling this year’s red tree motif, last year’s featured an array of white trees.
http://time.com/5465753/melania-trump-on-white-house-christmas-decorations/

[font size="8"]I Need A Drink
[br] [/font] [br]

Hey everyone, we’ve been doing this Top 10 thing for 3 years now and I really need a drink!

So of course you know the idea behind this is that we kick back, have a few drinks, get drunk, and talk about literally anything in the news as long as it doesn’t relate to politics. What’s the subject on the table this week you might ask? Well I love a good beef, and good beef, but really there’s nothing more interesting than a feud between two people. You know kind of like Trump and fake news. But this beef concerns a rock star and a hip hop star clashing over stage design. So tell me bartender, what goes well with a roller coaster? Yeah why don’t you just save me a step and feed me some vomit directly! In case you don’t know what I’m talking about – former Motley Crue drummer Tommy Lee and current roller coaster rider Travis Scott got into a bit of a beef over the design of their respective stages in the last week.

Is imitation the sincerest form of flattery ... or is it a plain rip off? That's the question that Motley Crue's Tommy Lee is asking after accusing popular rapper-singer Travis Scott utilizing the Crue's rollercoaster ideas in separate performances.

Posting on Instagram, an upset Lee stated, "Just found out this fucking idiot @travisscott or someone on his team ripped off the 360 AND The Crüecifly! WTF!! Get an original idea bro...(swipe to see who did this shit first) BRB there’s more ..." The first post shows Scott's performance then scrolls to Lee's Crue performance aboard the famous 360 coaster. Lee then posted a second video in which Scott is performing aboard a coaster similar to the Cruecifly that Motley Crue used during their final run.

"ANNNNND not one rip off but TWO. DOPE. I get copying is a form of flattery, but this is just straight ripping off my shit. What do you guys think???," continued Lee in the second post. See both videos below.

The comments in the posts yield support for both sides, with some calling it a blatant rip off while others defend Scott or lay the blame elsewhere in the rapper's camp.

Regardless, Lee does seem upset and ready to pursue things further, adding in a tweet:
http://loudwire.com/tommy-lee-travis-scott-ripped-off-motley-crue-rollercoaster-stunts/

Ah yeah that’s good! So if you’re Tommy Lee, imitation is clearly *NOT* the most sincere form of flattery. Instead you’re a rip off artist!!!! Go to hell!!! Well, Mr. Lee is determined to bring down Mr. Scott over one of the dumbest beefs of all time.

Rocker Tommy Lee is confident he will prevail if he takes rapper Travis Scott to court over their shared onstage roller coaster design.

The drummer hit out at Travis on social media this week (ends30Nov18) after discovering the Goosebumps MC performs on a special 360 degree loop as part of his new Astroworld - Wish You Were Here Tour, an idea Lee first showed off during Motley Crue shows between 2011 and 2015.

During another segment of the show, the hip-hop star's ride is suspended over the crowd - just like The Cruecify, the ride Tommy had used on the road.

The veteran musician vented about the striking similarities between the two set-ups on Instagram, where he shared footage of both performances, and then he added on Twitter, "I get copying is a form of flattery, but this is just straight ripping off my s**t... Hey @trvisXX lawyer up!"

Travis' attorney, Laurie L. Soriano, promptly responded to the threat of legal action, insisting Lee's claims were baseless as they had actually hired the original inventor to create the Astroworld roller coaster, but now the rocker has done some of his own digging and is fighting back.
http://music-news.com/news/UK/117646/Tommy-Lee-determined-to-prove-Travis-Scott-s-stage-rollercoaster-is-a-rip-off

Yeah you know obviously the first step is to lawyer up because you know, you cant solve anything these days without obstructing the American legal system. Because, lawyers. Now what about when Tommy Lee was accusing Travis Barker of Blink 182 of ripping off his style? Ah, a little hole in your theory there, Mr. Lee!

Tommy Lee took to Twitter to respond to those who claimed he “stole his shit” from Travis Barker, and Barker’s response was perfect.

Earlier this week, Motley Crüe drummer Tommy Lee caught wind of rapper Travis Scott’s ASTROWORLD Tour setup. Lee in turn accused him of ripping off old sets by posting side-by-side videos of both stage designs.

Since then, fans have come forward claiming that Lee ripped off the idea from Blink-182’s Travis Barker.

Lee responded to the claims by posting a video of him doing the same drum stunt from 1981 (although fans were quick to correct him that it was actually ’87), long before Barker began doing something similar.
https://www.altpress.com/news/tommy-lee-responds-ripping-off-travis-barker/

I don’t think that wine glass is big enough! So it’s pretty well established by now that Tommy Lee is a total psychopath. But we got to post Travis Barker’s response because it’s too damn good:

https://twitter.com/travisbarker/status/1068738058948816896

So is imitation the most sincere form of flattery or is everyone who dares imitate the great Mr. Lee a rip off artist? Well that’s where we will let you be the judge because the connection he’s making is well, let’s just file this one under Dave Chappelle’s “When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong!”.

Earlier today, Motley Crüe drummer Tommy Lee caught wind of rapper Travis Scott’s ASTROWORLD Tour setup. Lee in turn accused him of ripping off old sets by posting side-by-side videos of both stage designs.

Lee told Scott to “lawyer up” soon after, and now he’s returning to social media with a new development, alleging they both used the same production company.

“And the plot thickens! After I and our production crew created the 360 and Crüecifly, we hired a company called SGPS in Las Vegas to create it. WELLLLL GUESS WHO’S DOING TRAVIS’S SET DESIGN???? Fucking SGPS! So all u mothafuckas tellin’ me I’m not right can fuck off.”

SGPS lists several of Motley Crüe’s tour on their website, including 2005’s Carnival Of Sins, 2008’s Crüe Fest and 2009’s Crüe Fest 2.

The production company has also worked with blink-182 where they constructed Travis Barker’s flying drum riser for their return in 2009, which marked their first post-hiatus tour.
https://www.altpress.com/news/tommy-lee-travis-scott-astroworld-stage/

[font size="8"]Deep State Diaries Episode 22: The Central Intelligence Agency
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time for episode 22 of Deep State Diaries. Yes we’re touring the 24 branches and services that make up the United States government. Everything from the FBI to the IRS to the Pentagon to the CIA to the DPW to the DVA to parks and recreation and all branches and services in between. Of course if you’re here you probably already know more about our government and how it works than your average Fox News loving Trump supporter does. So that’s what this segment is going to address. We are going to do a deep dive into all that makes the United States the United States. Because we here at the Top 10 love to educate as well as entertain. Because we care.

[font size="6"]The CiA[/font]

Now it’s time to have some fun! We’re getting into the meat of the United States intelligence – the Central Intelligence Agency. You might have heard of the CIA from such movie franchises as Jason Bourne, the Mission: Impossible movies, the TV shows Archer, 24 and Quantico, James Bond, I could go on and on. But what does the CIA really do? You know people like Alex Jones have these bizarre fantasies about what the CIA does, but what do they really do? In fact, what you may be surprised to learn is that spy work is actually more boring than it sounds. Or is it? Well the intelligence community is all over the horrifying torture and murder of Washington Post editor Jamal Khashoogi, and it’s quite frankly an intelligence nightmare.

President Donald Trump disputed that U.S. intelligence officials have definitively concluded that Saudi’s crown prince ordered the murder of U.S.-based columnist Jamal Khashoggi, while continuing to tout the importance of maintaining economic ties with the Kingdom.

A confidential Central Intelligence Agency report on Khashoggi’s death says Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman “might have done it,” Trump said Thursday, referring to a demand that the journalist be killed. But the CIA “didn’t conclude” that the prince made the demand, the president told reporters during a press conference at his Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida.

“You can conclude maybe he did or maybe he didn’t,” Trump said about the CIA report. “Whether he did or whether he didn’t, he denies it vehemently.”

Several news organizations including the Washington Post and New York Times have reported that the CIA concluded the crown prince ordered Khashoggi’s assassination in Istanbul last month, contradicting the Saudi government’s claim he wasn’t involved. CIA officials have high confidence in their conclusion, which is based on multiple sources of intelligence, the Post reported Nov. 16.
http://time.com/5462128/donald-trump-disputes-cia-saudi-prince-khashoggi/

Yes there’s a party in the CIA! Thanks Weird Al! but of course the feud between the CIA and the Trump administration about what really happened is, well, the stuff of pure insanity. Because that’s what happens in 2018 is that there’s some insane shit happening because we have a president who has somehow managed to redefine what the word “truth” is.

CIA director Gina Haspel found herself at the center of a political dispute Tuesday amid reports that the White House was blocking her from briefing Senators on the murder of Washington Post journalist Jamal Khashoggi.

Illinois Democrat Sen. Dick Durbin told CNN's Wolf Blitzer Tuesday that senators were told Haspel will not participate in Wednesday's all-Senate classified briefing alongside Secretary of State Mike Pompeo and Defense Secretary James Mattis despite indications that lawmakers on both sides of the aisle would like to hear from her directly about the CIA's assessment regarding Khashoggi's killing.

"We were told that she would not be attending the briefing for members of Congress," Durbin said.

"That is extraordinary when we are dealing with the Khashoggi situation, the assertion by the State Department and intelligence agencies, her absence is obvious and its noted, and it raises a serious question as to whether this administration is giving us the whole truth," he added.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/27/politics/cia-haspel-senate-briefing/index.html

So is that thumbs up salute the new 2018 Nazi salute? Yeah probably. So the CIA as you can imagine is one gigantic bureaucracy. So what does the CIA do on a day to day basis? Well as you can imagine the word “investigate” is in their name so that’s what they do!

In 1993, Michael Pullara, a lawyer in Texas, was having breakfast when he came across a New York Times article about a CIA agent being shot dead in a car near Tbilisi, Georgia. He recognized the victim, Freddie Woodruff, immediately as the brother of a close friend from childhood. Intrigued, Pullara didn't fully believe the explanation soon offered by Georgian authorities: that Woodruff had been hit by a stray bullet fired from the gun of a drunk villager, Anzor Sharmaidze.

What followed took him across Eastern Europe to learn more about the CIA-agent-turned-KGB-mole, Aldrich Ames, who met with Woodruff not long before his killing; to a prison, to learn about the fate of Sharmaidze, who was convicted and originally sentenced to 15 years; and to back alleys to meet thugs and former Soviet officials. The theory he lays out, one he believes to be bolstered by former FBI and CIA agents, is somewhat complex: He suggests the feds knew Ames was a mole and temporarily left him alone to trade secrets—perhaps hoping he might lead to more moles or hostile spies—but never considered what would happen if Ames and Woodruff had any sort of run-in. If Pullara is to be believed, Ames passed along information about Woodruff to the Russians, whose military intelligence service, the GRU, killed him as a favor to ex-KGB diehards.
https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/qvqkyx/the-quest-to-pin-the-90s-murder-of-a-cia-agent-on-the-kgb

And by the way in case you’re wondering if CIA mind control is real – yes there is a bit of truth in the conspiracy theories. But contrary to what Alex Jones and Coast To Coast AM say, no, they’re not using it on celebrities like Beyonce. Actually, they decided against using it. Or that’s what they want you to think, or is it? We’re not saying!

Shortly after 9/11, the CIA considered using a drug it thought might work like a truth serum and force terror suspects to give up information about potential attacks.

After months of research, the agency decided that a drug called Versed, a sedative often prescribed to reduce anxiety, was “possibly worth a try.” But in the end, the CIA decided not to ask government lawyers to approve its use.

The existence of the drug research program – dubbed “Project Medication” – is disclosed in a once-classified report that was provided to the American Civil Liberties Union under a judge’s order and was released by the organization Tuesday.

The 90-page CIA report, which was provided in advance to The Associated Press, is a window into the internal struggle that medical personnel working in the agency’s detention and harsh interrogation program faced in reconciling their professional ethics with the chance to save lives by preventing future attacks.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2018/11/14/cia-truth-serum-after-9-11/1997442002/

[font size="6"]Score Card [/font]

Overall importance: A
How Things Are Going: B+
Likely hood To Survive: B+

Overall: B+

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

For our big British special edition, we’re going to cover a branch that’s very unique to England – M:I-6 ! That’s the intelligence agency that employs James Bond, don’t you know?

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”][/font]

I cannot wait to have this next guest on, one of my favorite bands of all time. Their latest album is called “Bad Witch”, you can see them at the Hollywood Palladium starting Dec. 6th – Dec. 15th on their “Cold And Black And Infinite” tour. Playing their song “God Break Down The Door”, give it up for the one, the only Nine Inch Nails!
https://media.pitchfork.com/photos/5b21342d57d25b55cad148ea/1:1/w_320/bad%20witch.jpg

Happy 3rd anniversary everybody! See you in London next week for our Big British Special! See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: UCB Theater Franklin St, Hollywood, CA
Special Thanks To: UCB Theater Management
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: UCLA Gospel Choir, Westwood
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
Nine Inch Nails Appear Courtesy Of: Interscope / Nothing Records
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: [email protected]

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

November 28, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-21: Wheel Of Corruption & The Half Blood Prince Pt. 2 Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-21: Wheel Of Corruption & The Half Blood Prince Pt. 2 Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! What’s up Phoenix? Hey you guys are the last stop on our US tour this year. Ah, now don’t be sad! we will be back soon. And yes there are liberals in Phoenix, I know a few of them! I know this is Sheriff Joe country. Whew, man, I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving, because shit got real dark real quick. So let’s talk about something fun, like how Axl Rose put on the Guns N Roses show of a lifetime despite the fact that he was violently ill. So they were in Abu Dhabi doing a show, and came out and told the crowd that he wasn’t feeling great. But they went on to play a whopping 20 songs. I don’t care who you are or where you come from but that’s pretty damned impressive if you ask me! So naturally they were getting a lot of crap from the local radio stations but really, who cares? Dave Grohl played 10 songs after he crashed to the floor and broke his leg! That’s true dedication. And as to whether or not they’re going to let something like a little vomit ruin the end of their tour? GNR said hell no! They plan to power through the next few months and finish out the tour as scheduled. I have to say GNR has my newfound respect, and I still love that Axl Rose continues to troll Trump over Trump’s use of Sweet Child O’ Mine at his rallies. If you don’t follow Axl on Twitter, you definitely should! OK that’s enough of the intro, we got a lot of idiocy to get to, but first for John Oliver’s season finale, we have to play his story on the rise of authoritarianism around the globe, and if you’re not alarmed by this, you should be:

&t=471s

Holy shit, where do we begin this week? Hey everybody, the Wheel Of Corruption is back! And, to start with, we got to talk about the guy who we currently call “president”, Donald J. Trump (1) and his iron fist policy at the US – Mexican border, and yeah, that is the stuff of pure fucking evil. In the second slot this week is also Donald Trump (2) and he's setting a rather dangerous and almost certainly evil precedent by putting the interests of Saudi Arabia and that insane $110 billion arms deal above the interests of American citizens. Yes, this is a bad deal with a dirty dealer and very evil. And speaking of evil, for the third slot this week, we got to talk about the Proud Boys (3). So after the brew ha ha in Brooklyn, Gavin McInnes quit the group and it’s an absurdly stupid tale of the possible demise of everyone’s favorite Trump loving hate group. In the fourth slot, we’re all gonna die!!!! Well not really but this extremely alarming new study on climate change (4) is going to be presenting some grim news that might have the potential to kill us all. In the fifth slot this week is of course our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates (5) and this week, we’re going to take a look at a chicken pox outbreak in an ant-vaccination stronghold in North Carolina, and more importantly, where is the bullshit coming from? At number 6 is our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” (6) and this week our resident pastor is going to ask the question “Is CNN Satanic?”? Well the answer is in no way shocking if you know religious Trump supporters at all! For the seventh slot, we’ve got one of our favorite features – “Beating A Dead Horse” (7) and it’s back for the 3rd week in a row. So did you see the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade this year? If so you might have seen two women kissing, and well, the religious right is having NONE of that. Yeah, give it a rest! For the 8th slot this week we’ve got a brand new feature for you, and it’s simply called “NO!!!!”. Did you hear about the high school seniors in Baraboo, Wisconsin who made a Nazi salute for a yearbook photo? NO!!!! Or simply NEIN!!!! And speaking of the ninth slot (NEIN!!!!), we’ve got a new, Thanksgiving edition of People Are Dumb (9), because even during the holidays, stupid doesn’t take one! Finally this week we’ve got a brand new installment of our ongoing series that explains how government works to your Trump loving friends and relatives, Deep State Diaries (10) is going to take a look at the US Census Bureau! Controversy alert! And to cap it off, we’ve got some live music for you from Linkin Park’s own Mike Shinoda! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font] [br]

Hey everyone say it with me: It’s time for the WHEEL OF CORRUPTION! YAY!!!!!

Of course you know the rules by now – I spin the wheel and we have to talk about whatever it lands on. Of course if it lands on the guacamole option, you know that it costs $1.50 extra. So here’s what is on the wheel this week:

- Guns
- Abortion
- Crime
- Racism
- Poverty
- Election Theft
- Buy A Vowel
- Clip Without Context
- Greed
- Sexism
- Spying
- Food
- Elections
- Donald Trump
- Clip Without Context
- Chance
- 5,000
- Bankrupt
- No
- Community Chest
- Donald Trump
- A Random Tweet
- Something Random In The News
- ‘Merica!
- Golf
- 10,000
- Guacamole
- Holy Shit
- Beating A Dead Horse
- This Fucking Guy
- How Is This Still A Thing?
- Harry Potter
- 15,000
- People Are Dumb
- I Need A Drink
- Infowars
- T-Shirt Cannon
- Lightning Round
- Bonus Spin

Let’s get this going! Spin that shit! Come on, no whammy, no whammy, no whammy… stop!!! And it’s a random tweet!

https://twitter.com/RightWingWatch/status/1064965785397993473

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm… post apocalypse Thanksgiving dinner in a bucket! That just looks so appetizing doesn’t it? Just look at the green bean casserole, that looks like vomit doesn’t it? Spin it again! Donald Trump! So yeah, the caravan finally hit the Mexican border, and as you can imagine it was a complete shit show. Rather than being met with open arms and doing what it says on the bottom of the Statue of Liberty, instead, Trump raised his middle finger high in the air and lobbied teargas at the people who wanted in, because, illegal immigrant hysteria.

President Donald Trump suggested Monday that some adults had "grabbed" children at the Southwestern border to better their chances of entering the US while confronting federal agents during an incident Sunday that resulted in the use of tear gas.

Trump -- speaking at a roundtable event in Biloxi, Mississippi -- described what he called "grabbers" -- migrants who grab children and "think they'll have a certain status by having a child." He alluded to the people with children in the group as possibly not being their parents.

"In some cases, you know, they're not the parents," the President said. "These are people, they call 'em grabbers. They grab a child because they think they'll have a certain status by having a child. You know, you have certain advantages in terms of our crazy laws that, frankly, Congress should be changing."

When asked for evidence of his claim by reporters, Trump demurred.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/26/politics/trump-grabbers-southern-border-migrants/index.html

Really? That’s a thing? I mean seriously how deluded do you have to be to even suggest such a thing? Oh wait, he was at a rally for Cindy Hyde-Smith, a racist who keeps losing her sponsors, because she’s such a racist. OK, moving on. But really, the immigration debate has gone completely off the rails and now these are the kinds of things we’re forced to deal with. But one thing the border isn’t? it’s not Trump’s personal plaything!

It never should have come to this, to scenes of women and children running from tear gas fired by American border agents.

And it wouldn’t have happened if President Donald Trump hadn’t done everything he could to create a crisis at the border.

He began concocting the humanitarian nightmare that now exists from the very beginning of his campaign, falsely claiming that the southern border was begin overrun by migrants.
Truth is lost in immigration debate

The truth is that the number of border crossers apprehended by border patrol officers in 2017 was the lowest since the early 1970s.

Trump also knows – or should know – that the migrants in the caravan from Central America are fleeing from some of the worst situations on the planet.

As Democratic Sen. Sen. Amy Klobuchar said over the weekend, the Trump administration “should have been working with these Central American countries a long time ago” to curb mass flight from violence and poverty.

Instead, Trump makes continuous threats and tries to rewrite the federal statute for asylum seekers without involving Congress.
https://www.azcentral.com/story/opinion/op-ed/ej-montini/2018/11/26/migrant-caravan-border-tear-gas-donald-trump/2112338002/

Yeah so that did happen. And not only that, Trump continues to pour gasoline on the fire, because hey, that’s exactly what he does. I mean the Statue Of Liberty does not read “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses, and go fuck yourselves!”. No, it doesn’t! And not only that, Trump is going full Nazi and threatening to close the border!

The busiest border checkpoint on the U.S.-Mexico border, San Ysidro Port of Entry, was closed to crossings Sunday, officials with U.S. Customs and Border Protection announced amid reports of Central American migrants attempting to breach the border.

The border checkpoint was closed to all traffic by 11:40 a.m. local time as migrants protested in an effort to plead the U.S to move faster in processing asylum requests, according to The Associated Press.

Lanes have reopened as of 5:15 p.m. local time.

Here are the latest updates:

Update 6:50 a.m. EST Nov. 26: President Donald Trump took to Twitter early Monday, threatening to permanently close the border to prevent migrants from coming into the country.

“Mexico should move the flag waving Migrants, many of whom are stone cold criminals, back to their countries,” Trump tweeted. “Do it by plane, do it by bus, do it anyway you want, but they are NOT coming into the U.S.A. We will close the Border permanently if need be. Congress, fund the WALL!”
https://www.ajc.com/news/national/border-checkpoint-closed-migrants-march-toward/w0y1NYaBPVrFFMqxCprlBP/

Wow, even I’m out on this one. So president man baby continues to use the border as his personal play toy and is using it to get his bullshit wall, which isn’t going to stop shit. I mean really if you build a 50 foot wall, someone is going to build a 60 foot ladder. Just ask Berlin how well that went. Thank you audience! But this might be the most insane justification of these war crimes being committed at the border:

U.S. Customs and Border Protection on Sunday closed part of the southern border with Mexico and fired tear gas and pepper spray at Central American migrants attempting to breach a fence separating the two countries.

Images of fleeing women and children, like the one captured in the tweet below, were widely shared, drawing condemnation from those calling it “inhumane,” “an abomination” and “antithetical to America.”

CBP said “several migrants threw projectiles at the agents in San Diego. Border Patrol agents deployed tear gas to dispel the group because of the risk to agents’ safety. Several agents were hit by the projectiles.”

On Fox & Friends, host Ainsley Earhardt had a different message. “If you don’t want a speeding ticket, don’t speed,” she said.

Besides, pepper spray is no big deal, according to former U.S. Border Patrol deputy chief Ron Colburn, who explained to the Fox hosts early Monday how it could be used as a topping on a favorite Mexican dish:
https://www.marketwatch.com/story/fox-news-guest-pepper-spray-used-on-migrants-could-be-served-on-nachos-2018-11-26

Oh yeah you can use military grade pepper spray as a taco topping! It goes great with Sriracha! But really guys, grow the fuck up. Oh wait, you don’t. And of course President Man Baby doubles down on the crimes he committed this week:

President Donald Trump is strongly defending the U.S. use of tear gas at the Mexican border to repel a crowd of migrants that included angry rock-throwers but also barefoot, crying children.

Critics denounced the border agents’ action as overkill, but Trump kept to a hard line.

“They were being rushed by some very tough people and they used tear gas,” Trump said Monday of the previous day’s encounter. “Here’s the bottom line: Nobody is coming into our country unless they come in legally.”

The showdown at the San Diego-Tijuana border crossing has thrown into sharp relief two competing narratives about the caravan of migrants hoping to apply for asylum but stuck on the Mexican sider. Trump portrays them as a threat to U.S. national security, intent on exploiting America’s asylum law, but others insist he is exaggerating to stoke fears and achieve his political goals.
http://time.com/5464165/donald-trump-defends-tear-gas-migrant-caravan/

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… oh hey it’s a clip without context!

Someone’s not getting any! Uh… so how do you explain the hot lesbians, Dave? Yeah there’s a hole in your theory there. Spin it again! Donald Trump. So in the last week, Trump has put that insane arms deal with Saudi Arabia at the forefront of his Saudi Arabia First policy. Hey you know what? Let’s make Saudi Arabia Great Again! Riyadh first! And so on. Trump is really trying hard to bury the murder of Jamal Khashoogi, but really that is one thing that will come back to bite him in the ass hard when the dems take over the House in October.

Rarely does one crisis faithfully reflect all the flaws or strengths of an administration’s foreign policy. And yet what is so stunning and disturbing about President Donald Trump’s response to the Saudi murder of Washington Post columnist Jamal Khashoggi is that it does precisely that.

From the outset of the Trump presidency, the pattern has been clear: Trump, contradicting both U.S. interests and values, feels more comfortable with strongmen and authoritarians than with America’s traditional democratic allies. It’s no surprise he’s courted Saudi King Salman and coddled the Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman (MBS).

All administrations deal with strongmen — and none have elevated human rights to the key organizing principle in U.S. foreign policy. But this administration has nearly emptied America’s foreign policy of moral or ethical values and provided a green light to every authoritarian to repress or kill journalists without consequence, certainly from Washington. And Trump described Saudi Arabia as a “spectacular ally,” even though the CIA has concluded MBS ordered Khashoggi’s murder.

In Trump’s universe, if he thinks something, it must be true. In reality, his faith in Saudi Arabia is built on, well, sand. While it plays a role in counter-terrorism cooperation and maintaining the flow of oil, Trump has greatly exaggerated its importance.

No matter how much he believes the Saudis will shove the administration’s yet-to-be-revealed peace plan down the Palestinians’ throats, spend $450 billion in the U.S. to create hundreds of thousands of new jobs, do America’s bidding on oil pricing policy, and be the linchpin for putting Iran back in its box, it is all magical thinking — just like his beliefs that Mexico will pay for his “beautiful wall,” trade wars are “easy to win,” the Russians didn’t interfere in our presidential election because Putin strongly denied it, and MBS didn’t order the killing of Khashoggi because he was “very strong” in denying it several times.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/2018/11/27/jamal-khashoggi-murder-mbs-donald-trump-american-values-interests-column/2116372002/

Make Saudi Arabia Great Again! Make Saudi Arabia Great Again! Make Saudi Arabia Great Again! Ooh, man that was a nice little chant we had going there! But yeah that seemed to be the general consensus here. So why won’t Trump sanction these murderous scumbags? Instead, he wants to give them more weapons, because, deal!

The U.S. invaded Afghanistan (none of the hijackers were Afghans) in response to the Sept. 11 attacks.

The U.S. government insinuated a relationship between al-Qaida and Saddam Hussein’s regime in Iraq as part of its justification for invading that country in 2003 (none of the hijackers were Iraqis, and al-Qaida was among Hussein’s most implacable enemies).

But Saudi Arabia got a free pass, as did the United Arab Emirates, from which two of the hijackers came.

Why? Oil, money, and U.S. foreign policy.

Saudi Arabia and the UAE control a great deal of the world’s oil, and can threaten to disrupt international oil markets (and international life in general) any time they don’t get their way.

Saudi Arabia and the UAE are also the top two buyers of U.S. weapons.

Finally, Saudi Arabia and the UAE support the U.S. agenda of isolating Iran and frustrating its regime’s regional ambitions, and allow the U.S. military to operate bases on their territory pursuant to that agenda.
https://www.newsday.com/opinion/commentary/two-numbers-explain-why-trump-won-t-sanction-saudi-arabia-1.23922067

Woohoo!!! World war III is a coming, yo! But really this is a classic damned if you do, damned if you don’t scenario. But of course Der Trumpenfuror doesn’t see it that way. He’ll do it both ways if it means pissing off the other side.

For more than a month, business leaders across the country have been waiting to get a definitive answer from Washington about what turn the relationship between the United States and Saudi Arabia may take in the wake of the murder of Jamal Khashoggi — and how it might impact their business relationships with the kingdom.

Despite offering public condemnations over Mr. Khashoggi’s death and distancing themselves from the kingdom by pulling out of a major investment conference, many executives appeared to expect that business would quickly, if not quietly, return to normal.

“Keep in mind, it is a big country,” Larry Fink, the BlackRock chief executive, said early this month. “There are many fine people in country, like there are many fine people in every country. These things are not black and white, and they’re very complex.”

But things have changed drastically since then. President Trump has offered a vociferous defense of the kingdom and, by extension, its de facto leader, Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, and dismissed a report from his own intelligence officers that concluded the prince had ordered the murder.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/26/business/dealbook/saudi-arabia-sanctions-trump.html

So if you’re keeping score at home, state sanctioned murder, egregious misuse of the military, and violence against journalists are apparently all OK now by their standards. How did we get in this mess in the first place and how are we going to get out of it? Well, deal!

Tunisia’s decision to invite Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman for a visit had local journalists up in arms last week. “Inviting bin Salman to Tunisia is an insult to the revolution and its values,” the Tunisian journalists union announced, upon learning of the invitation. “He’s an enemy of freedom of expression.”

Some 100 Egyptian journalists also issued a statement condemning the visit of bin Salman to Cairo, where he was received Monday with all the requisite flourishes.

These protests were joined by human rights groups in both countries, while the social networks in Egypt, where he landed on Monday, and Tunisia and Algeria, where bin Salman is also expected to visit, were roiling against the visit of the “holder of the saw,” as one tweet called him, and not just because of the murder of journalist Jamal Khashoggi.

The Algerian government on Monday was the only Arab government to issue a statement condemning the murder – 53 days after it occurred – but hastened to add that it accepted the Saudi version of events and respects that country’s judicial system.
https://www.haaretz.com/middle-east-news/.premium-how-mohammad-bin-salman-put-his-kingdom-in-debt-to-trump-and-netanyahu-1.6695165

[font size="8"]The Proud Boys
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… Woohoo! I win 5,000 of something. Not sure what it is but it’s 5,000 of something! Spin it again! And it lands on… Racism. I am loving watching the Proud Boys implode aren’t you? Well after their latest Rumble In The Bronx (see: Idiots #5-17 ), apologies to Jackie Chan, it seems that Paypal is doing the thing that they did to Infowars and revoked their privileges, and it seems that Gavin McInnes is ready to jump ship and wash his hands clean of the group. Here’s more.

Really? New York Nine? That’s the worst mafia name ever! I mean if you guys are going to be classified as an extremist group by the FBI you should come up with something more threatening! Like Killer Cult or Fight Club, oh wait, that one’s already taken. But you know the song – Saturday Night’s All Right For Fighting, but if you’re the Proud Boys… you might be seeing the inside of a jail cell relatively soon.

The Proud Boys, a punch-happy extremist gang whose members spend their time harassing people online and attacking them in real life, fell apart at the seams last week as the rest of the country gave thanks.

Over the course of the Thanksgiving holiday, the Proud Boys were revealed as an extremist group in the eyes of the FBI; saw their leader, Vice Media co-founder Gavin McInnes, publicly bail on them; added two of their members to a growing list of defendants in a rioting case in New York City; and named a new leader in Jason Lee Van Dyke, their lawyer who himself is a serial harasser and racist criminal. (A representative for Vice Media reached out to HuffPost after publication to note that McInnes left the company 10 years ago.)

Today’s Proud Boys are not the same as yesterday’s Proud Boys, who just last month bragged that they had the support of police after beating protesters in the streets of New York City and Portland, Oregon.

These Proud Boys are being proudly thrown under the bus by their misogynistic and destructive founder. Immediately after that weekend of coastal violence in October, McInnes said publicly that he was arranging for the surrender of the members involved. Eight of them now face charges of assault and rioting in New York City.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-proud-boys-are-imploding_us_5bfc16dde4b0eb6d9311e26d

Oh sure, it’s all fun and games until someone gets slapped with an assault charge! Maybe that’s why Gavin is bailing on the group? Well, like all horrible things, the Proud Boys started after Trump’s inauguration with the intent of “owning the snowflakes”. But hey, they had their fun and they beat the shit out of some Antifa noobs. But meet the new leader of the Proud Boys, who promises to take the group in a much cleaner direction!

The new leaders of the far-right Proud Boys “fraternity” are scrambling to improve the group’s image after founder Gavin McInnes claimed he was quitting last week, introducing new rules that downplay the group’s penchant for violence and prepare the group for the potential of future law enforcement action.

But not everyone in the Proud Boys is on board with the rules. One prominent member from the group’s militant wing who wants to take the group in a more racist direction claims he’s really the one in charge—and that he won’t let “a few losers who think they own the Proud Boys” take over.

Vice magazine co-founder McInnes launched the Proud Boys in 2016, claiming that the group would be a contemporary version of men’s clubs like the Elks, but devoted to “the West.” Like other men’s clubs, the Proud Boys came with a complicated, bizarre hierarchy that required members to submit to a number of rules, including a “beat-in” hazing ritual where members have to call out the names of cereal brands while they’re punched.

But the Proud Boys quickly attracted more controversy than an ordinary drinking group, especially after members began fighting with left-wing anti-fascist activists at pro-Trump rallies. McInnes insisted his group wasn’t racist, but Proud Boys kept appearing with racist figures or using the group as a gateway to white supremacist activism.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/new-proud-boy-rules-less-fighting-less-wanking

Excuse me a minute… but yeah I think a Proud Boys rally is kind of like that. After all there is heavy drinking involved, and I’ve always seemed to think that they and Antifa must have synced up drinking schedules or something. But you know, they’re your average fun loving white supremacists, now with less fighting!

A government watchdog group calling for more transparency is suing the FBI, saying it should share more information about what it's doing to monitor white supremacists and other hate groups.

The non-profit watchdog group, Property of the People, also uncovered a bombshell report about the Proud Boys. It says the FBI considers the far-right organization to be extremist with links to white nationalism.

Jason L. Van Dyke, a Proud Boys spokesperson who's also worked as a lawyer for the group, adamantly claimed they're not racist before a KATU reporter asked him about a racist tweet.
https://katu.com/news/local/proud-boys-respond-to-report-saying-fbi-calls-group-extremist-linked-to-white-nationalism

[font size="8"]We’re All Gonna Die
[br] [/font] [br] B

Spin it!!!! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! No, a whammy!!!!

Spin it again! And it lands on the environment! Hey, everyone guess what? We’re all gonna die! Yeah woooooooooooooooooo!!!! Woooooooooo. Woo. Woo. So how are we gonna die this week? It’s not in a nuclear holocaust yet, but it is instead going to be from extremely toxic pollution and a 3 degree change in the climate! It will kill us all… eventually. We think. But of course the powers that be simply don’t give a shit. And I mean they really don’t give a shit! Take a look at what our so called leader is trying to do with the report this week.

President Donald Trump on Monday dismissed a study produced by his own administration, involving 13 federal agencies and more than 300 leading climate scientists, warning of the potentially catastrophic impact of climate change.

Why, you ask?

"I don't believe it," Trump told reporters on Monday, adding that he had read "some" of the report.
On one level, this shouldn't be surprising. Trump's views on climate change at this point are very, very well established.

Just over eight years ago, he tweeted this: "The concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese in order to make U.S. manufacturing non-competitive." In 2014, he penned this tweet: "It's late in July and it is really cold outside in New York. Where the hell is GLOBAL WARMING??? We need some fast! It's now CLIMATE CHANGE."
https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/26/politics/donald-trump-climate-change/index.html

Yeah so we’re all gonna die! Not from a nuclear holocaust, but the Trump administration is working hard to making Black Lungs Great Again! you know guys, there’s a reason why it’s called “Black Lung”. And no, it’s

The federal government on Friday released a long-awaited report with an unmistakable message: The effects of climate change, including deadly wildfires, increasingly debilitating hurricanes and heat waves, are already battering the United States, and the danger of more such catastrophes is worsening.

The report’s authors, who represent numerous federal agencies, say they are more certain than ever that climate change poses a severe threat to Americans' health and pocketbooks, as well as to the country’s infrastructure and natural resources. And while it avoids policy recommendations, the report’s sense of urgency and alarm stands in stark contrast to the lack of any apparent plan from President Trump to tackle the problems, which, according to the government he runs, are increasingly dire.

The congressionally mandated document — the first of its kind issued during the Trump administration — details how climate-fueled disasters and other types of worrisome changes are becoming more commonplace throughout the country and how much worse they could become in the absence of efforts to combat global warming.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/energy-environment/2018/11/23/major-trump-administration-climate-report-says-damages-are-intensifying-across-country/?utm_term=.0cf049c07695

?w=286

If you thought the 2018 hurricanes and fires were bad, wait until you see the 2019 hurricanes and wildfires! Hey I don’t remember there being a triple digit storm category! And if the fires and hurricanes are going to destroy your house, guess what? They’re also going to destroy your wallet! So you might want to hang on to your cash now, ladies and gentlemen!

A major scientific report issued by 13 federal agencies on Friday presents the starkest warnings to date of the consequences of climate change for the United States, predicting that if significant steps are not taken to rein in global warming, the damage will knock as much as 10 percent off the size of the American economy by century’s end.

The report, which was mandated by Congress and made public by the White House, is notable not only for the precision of its calculations and bluntness of its conclusions, but also because its findings are directly at odds with President Trump’s agenda of environmental deregulation, which he asserts will spur economic growth.

Mr. Trump has taken aggressive steps to allow more planet-warming pollution from vehicle tailpipes and power plant smokestacks, and has vowed to pull the United States out of the Paris Agreement, under which nearly every country in the world pledged to cut carbon emissions. Just this week, he mocked the science of climate change because of a cold snap in the Northeast, tweeting, “Whatever happened to Global Warming?”
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/23/climate/us-climate-report.html

Yeah probably. So this is going to destroy your home and possibly your wallet, and your investments and anything else you might hold dear. I mean shit, this news is so devastating that the entire world might be turning upside down. Hey, Al Gore warned us! He warned us! So, with that, get ready to say hello to the Great Brown North!

The increasing number of extreme events is causing dieback of Arctic plants or 'browning' across Arctic regions, a study has found. Scientists from the University of Sheffield in the UK studying the Arctic which is warming twice as fast as the global average found that plant dieback following these events could significantly reduce the ability of Arctic ecosystems to help combat climate change.

Previously, scientists had found that increasing summer warmth in the Arctic was encouraging vegetation to grow, turning areas green.

"Despite the scale of Arctic browning, until now we knew very little about its impacts on ecosystem carbon balance; the balance between carbon uptake by vegetation and its release from vegetation and soils," said Rachael Treharne, a PhD student at the University of Sheffield.

The study, published in the journal Global Change Biology, assessed the impacts of Arctic browning driven by extreme climatic events.
https://www.moneycontrol.com/news/environment/extreme-weather-conditions-turning-arctic-brown-may-impact-climate-change-study-3223711.html

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin the wheel shall we? Come on wheel goes round, wheel goes round, wheel goes round… and it lands on… another Clip Without Context!

Ah yes, I believe this is known as the classic “I’m Rubber You’re Glue” defense. Famously used in the case of Doo Doo Head V. Poo Poo Head. Spin it again! It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

There’s many things that you could possibly die from during your lifespan, and there’s many things happening now that could signal the end on a mass scale. Those things include the possibility of a nuclear holocaust and polluting on a catastrophic scale. But there’s one thing that you could possibly die from that you might not expect – deadly diseases that were supposedly eradicated decades ago. With the rise of anti-vaccination crusaders that’s a very real possibility.

A North Carolina school with a large anti-vaccine community is at the heart of the state's largest chickenpox outbreak in decades, officials say.

On Friday 36 students at Asheville Waldorf School were diagnosed with the disease, the Asheville Citizen-Times newspaper reported.

The school has one of the state's highest rates of religious exemption, allowing students to skip vaccination.

US health officials say vaccinating is far safer than getting chickenpox.

"This is the biggest chickenpox outbreak state health officials are aware of since the vaccine became available," a North Carolina Department of Health spokesman told the BBC in an emailed statement.

Out of the Waldorf School's 152 students, 110 have not received the vaccine for the varicella virus, known to most as chickenpox, the Citizen-Times found.
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-46267038

So how did this happen? How did we get to this point? Well there’s many theories but one theory seems to stem from religion and the fact that many religious people are adopting the idea that not vaccinating your kids means you won’t get autism. But they don’t know that. In fact nobody does. But the last thing anyone wants is small pox, chicken pox, polio or anything of the sort.

The number of N.C. kindergarteners opting out of required childhood vaccinations on religious grounds more than doubled in the five school years from 2012 to 2016. And both public health officials and anti-vaccine advocates agree that the exemption is being claimed by parents whose true objection to the shots has nothing to do with faith.

“I’ve had parents tell me they use it because there is no way for the state to decline it,” said Sen. Jeff Tarte, a Republican from Mecklenburg County. In 2015, he introduced a bill that would have eliminated the religious exemption for all children except those who are homeschooled. He and his co-sponsors dropped the bill within two weeks because of opposition from those who say the government should not force anyone to be injected with anything.
https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article188633004.html

No one is forcing you to do anything. But wouldn’t you rather sleep easier at night knowing that you’re not going to get deadly diseases? Wow, that is an astonishing level of stupid. So this is the biggest outbreak of the deadly disease known as chicken pox that hasn’t been seen in 20 years.

A North Carolina school with an anti-vaccine community at its heart is experiencing its worst outbreak of chickenpox in more than two decades.

The Ashville Waldorf primary school in Asheville, North Carolina, reported 36 cases of chickenpox this month.

Out of the school’s 152 students, 110 have not received vaccinations, according to the Citizen-Times newspaper.

The school boasts one of the highest vaccination exemption rates in the state, with families citing religious beliefs as the main reason for eschewing the preventative measure.

This is the worst outbreak since a vaccine for the contagious disease - which once affected 90 per cent of Americans - became available 20 years ago.

The school said in a statement: "Asheville Waldorf School is committed to protecting the health and safety of our community."
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/chickenpox-asheville-north-carolina-anti-vaccination-school-children-disease-contagious-a8641666.html

Apparently you’re not doing a very good job of it. So why did this community earn such a badge of dishonor? What could be the cause of 110 out of 156 kids not being properly vaccinated? Well the answer may shock you. Those anti vaccination messages you’re getting on your social media feeds? Guess where those might be coming from? Well, the answer is in no, way, shape, or form shocking.

Don't ever say that no one cares about your health. Apparently Russian bots and trolls do care a lot.

A study published in the American Journal of Public Health showed that Russian bots and trolls seem to be quite active in sending both anti-vaccination and pro-vaccination messages through Twitter. A team researchers from George Washington University (David A. Broniatowski PhD, SiHua Qi SM, and Lulwah AlKulaib SM), the University of Maryland (Sandra C. Quinn PhD and Amelia M. Jamison MAA, MPH), and Johns Hopkins University (Tao Chen PhD, Adrian Benton MS, , and Mark Dredze PhD) collected tweets from July 2014 through September 2017 and reviewed over 250 vaccination-related tweets sent by accounts connected to the Internet Research Agency. The Internet research Agency ain't just about research because it is backed by the Russian government and been indicted by a U.S. grand jury for attempting to meddle with the 2016 U.S. elections. My fellow Forbes contributor Arlene Weintraub covered this study nicely so you can read her article for more details.

So why would Russian bots and trolls send both anti-vaccination and pro-vaccination messages? Because they are indecisive, wishy-washy, or wondering to bot or not to bot? Nah, there's a good chance that they realize that our country is susceptible to being influenced, being divided, and overlooking established science. Routine childhood vaccination was a settled issue two decades ago. Vaccines have been among the greatest of public health triumphs. Without vaccines, many people would not be surviving long enough to get on Twitter or Facebook. Vaccines helped effectively eliminate measles from the U.S. back in 2000.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/brucelee/2018/08/25/that-anti-vaccination-message-may-be-from-a-russian-bot-or-troll/#7eca9946ff77

Yup, it’s Russia again. Which makes us wonder whether or not Russia should just be banned from the internet – they offer nothing but bad ideas. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin the wheel shall we? And it lands on… oh hey it’s a clip without context!

Oh yeah because an extinction level event is just so damn funny isn’t it? Well… spin it again! Oh hey it’s time for Holy Shit! Gather around, my fair brothers and sisters of Phoenix, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate! For the Holy Church of the Top 10 has convened and it’s our weekly duty to remind you why the holiest among us are also the most full of:

My fair congregation! You know in my quest to understand supporters of the Dark One, whose name shall not be spoken in my church, I came upon a stark realization. And that is that they have a warped view of what is satanic or not. Because the man who they put on a pedestal as a shining example of GAWD himself is actually a DAYMON!!! And apparently there are organizations with views that one might call “satanic”.

End Times broadcaster Rick Wiles weighed in on the news that CNN’s Jim Acosta had his press credentials temporarily restored on Friday by declaring that CNN is part of a demonic effort to destroy freedom in America.

“CNN is consumed with the spirit of rebellion and sedition, which is witchcraft,” Wiles said on his “TruNews” program on Friday. “Let’s not make any mistake about identifying what this is.”

“And the source of witchcraft is the mouth of hell itself,” agreed co-host Doc Burkhart.

“This is a fight for survival and he has got to resist them,” Wiles added. “Mr. Trump needs to publicly state that he is calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ to defend him. That is my prayer, that is my hope, that I hear Donald J. Trump publicly say, ‘I am calling on the name of Jesus Christ to fight my battles. My enemies are too great and too big and only God can help me.'”

Trump is “not fighting flesh and blood,” Wiles warned, but rather “demonic powers.”

“If they win,” he continued, “there will be no freedom in this country, perhaps for centuries. That is what this fight is all about, the elimination of freedom. Because it is a thoroughly corrupt, evil, wicked regime. They kill babies. They promote homosexuality. They promote sorcery and witchcraft. They’re evil. They’re wicked. Their wickedness is beyond our comprehension. That’s what we’re up against and that’s what’s trying to destroy President Trump. And if they succeed, the rest of us are going to be devoured by them. That is a fact.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/rick-wiles-cnn-is-demonic-and-seeks-to-destroy-freedom-consumed-with-witchcraft/

No, Rick, that is not a fact, that is well, it’s whatever the opposite of a fact is! So apparently CNN is something that someone might call “Satanic”. But no! Let me show you what real SATANISM is, ladies and gentlemen! But yes these people really do think that CNN is the spawn of the devil himself!!!

Religious Right radio host E.W. Jackson said on his “The Awakening” program yesterday that he will not believe anything reported by CNN because founder Ted Turner has said negative things about Christianity.

Turner, who once called Christianity “a religion for losers,” has reportedly softened his view in recent years, but Jackson still refuses to trust anything that CNN reports because he believes that the network is in league with Satan.

“CNN was founded by a renowned, convinced, convicted atheist,” Jackson said. “That spirit, that anti-Christ anointing is still on that thing, which is why their lead anchor is how he is. I don’t need to go any further than that, but he’s a confused young man and it’s because that spirit of atheism and anti-God and anti-Christian mindset just permeates that thing. So they’re not going to get anything right because when you’re that off—see, I really believe this—when you’re off spiritually like that, it’s very hard to get anything else right.”

Likewise, Jackson went on to say that he would refuse to be operated on by a surgeon who is an atheist.

“I’m serious,” he said. “I don’t care how good he is supposed to be because I believe when you’re that off about the fundamental nature of life, I can’t trust you with anything else. That’s it. Sorry. I can’t trust you with anything else because, to me, you are in league with the spirit of Satan. Why would I want to entrust my life to you and give the devil a shot at me? No, thank you.”

The same principle applies to CNN, Jackson said. “When the root is poison, guess what? The fruit is poison.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/e-w-jackson-doesnt-believe-cnn-because-the-network-is-in-league-with-satan/

Yes, the DAYMON hellfire is everywhere and the scourge of the wrath of GAWD shall not go unnoticed, can I get an amen!!! For it says in our good book “judge not lest ye be judged”, does it not? And I can prove it, I have it right here. But that’s not real SATANISM. Nothing is, at least how they are describing it! Here’s some real Satanism at work!

A group of Satanists that sued Netflix for $50 million for allegedly copying the image of its goat-headed deity has "amicably settled" its lawsuit with the video streaming giant.

The Satanic Temple organization claimed Netflix and Warner Bros. had copied the image of Baphomet -- a winged, half-man, half-goat figure that has been worshiped by various occult groups -- in its program "The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina."

A reproduction of the figure appeared in four episodes of the show without the group's permission, the group claimed.

But the group's leader said the suit has now been settled, and that "the unique elements of the Satanic Temple's Baphomet statue" will be acknowledged in the credits of the show's episodes.

"The Satanic Temple is pleased to announce that the lawsuit it recently filed against Warner Bros. and Netflix has been amicably settled," Lucien Greaves wrote in a statement.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/22/entertainment/satanic-temple-netflix-lawsuit-scli-intl/index.html

So the DEVIL is all around us, as you can clearly see! If not in our news networks then it’s in our network shows! I mean it’s all well and good but what does the Church Of Satan really think?

There are two prominent Satanic organizations, and only one of them has a problem with Netflix's Chilling Adventures of Sabrina.

The Satanic Temple filed a lawsuit against Netflix and Warner Bros. last week, alleging the statue of the Dark Lord in Sabrina's Academy of Unseen Arts infringes on the copyright of the organization's own statue of Baphomet. However, the Satanic Temple shouldn't be confused with the Church of Satan, which doesn't have a beef with the new Netflix series.

In a statement, the Church of Satan distanced itself from the Satanic Temple, which it says is known for "childish PR stunts" that "are not in anyway representative of the apolitical, individualistic and atheistic religion of Satanism."

The Church previously assessed FX's American Horror Story: Apocalypse and Sabrina, and noted, "Our members are watching these as many are horror fans and, as might be expected, some enjoy them and others find them not to their tastes—mileage varies amongst our folks who care enough to view it. We aren’t a collective, but a varied cabal of individuals, so to each his own!"
https://www.cbr.com/church-satan-netflix-sabrina-statement/

Yes, because apparently the devil works more among us than GAWD and JAYSUS do! Now in the Good Book does it not say that the dark one shall appear as creature of light? Yes, yes, it does I have it right here in front of me, sir! I mean even the church of SATAN says that DEMONIC forces are far more at work than an organization reporting on the news!

Satanic graffiti found in old bunkers is the work of "pranksters" rather than devil-worshippers, says an expert.

The symbols found in the warren of tunnels under Fort Austin in Plymouth are linked to Satanism, Church of Satan high priest Peter Gilmore said.

But he dismissed them as the work of teenagers "to upset the people who discover them" and said Satanists would have their "own home ritual spaces".

Police said the site was dangerous and the council pledged to block it up.
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-devon-46017331

There you have it folks, the DEVIL may not be working in CNN but he is definitely working in our media and our graffiti! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin the wheel shall we? Wheel goes round, and it lands on… what? Bankrupt? NO!!!!!

Spin it again. Oh hey it’s time for Beating A Dead Horse!

You know there are guarantees in America. Like you can guarantee that Trump is going to wake up, that is, assuming he sleeps at all, thinking “how can I be a dick today?”. You can also count on the internet outrage machine to crank it up way past 11 any time there’s a homosexual kiss on TV. And by outrage machine, I mean conservative Christian snowflakes who call themselves “family organizations” can really turn on the tears. So after the kiss seen ‘round America between two lesbian lovers on national TV, guess how they reacted? Well… very predictably as you might imagine!

A conservative group faced backlash on Twitter after it claimed the same-sex kiss televised live from the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in New York had broken the innocence of “millions of small children.”

ForAmerica ― whose mission is to “reinvigorate the public with the principles of American exceptionalism: freedom, prosperity and virtue” — accused Macy’s and NBC of blindsiding parents Thursday by airing the kiss between actresses Caitlin Kinnunen and Isabelle McCalla during a rendition of musical “The Prom.”

The group also accused the network and department store of trying to “push their agenda on little kids.”

In response, many tweeters noted that “love is love” and not “a political agenda.” “It was a family program. Not all families look the same. It’s good that all children see that,” wrote one. “Love is a family program,” added another.

Others claimed the innocence of American children had been more likely taken by the country’s gun violence epidemic and mass shootings:
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/conservative-group-gets-shredded-over-macys-same-sex-kiss-criticism_us_5bf7f08ee4b0eb6d930dc92c

You know what? Let’s throw that twee t up there for a minute.

https://twitter.com/ForAmerica/status/1065623392072675328

Yeah well hey, if these children’s parents had Fox News on this weekend, they probably also saw their fellow children get tear gas lobbied at them by a government who’s declared them second class citizens simply because they’re not from around here! Which is more horrifying? Thank you audience! But the details are even more horrifying! Who is the group behind the outrage? Why it’s ForAmerica – a Christian conservative group dedicated to fighting those godless heathens on the left!

Amid the multitude of objectively offensive occurrences on the Thanksgiving holiday — for instance President Trump spent Thursday at Mar-a-Lago threatening to close the border between U.S. and Mexico, dismissing the CIA’s reports on the killing of journalist Jamal Khashoggi, and thanking… himself — one conservative organization was scandalized by that polarizing, controversial annual event: The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.

ForAmerica is a conservative organization founded in 2010 that decries the rise of the “radical Left” and aims to use social media and pop culture to “capture the public’s imagination” and “educat[e] a new generation of conservatives.” Thursday morning, their account tweeted a still from the Macy’s Parade of two women kissing along with their horror at the sight:

Actresses Caitlin Kinnunen and Isabelle McCalla were performing a number from the musical The Prom when the kiss — destroyer of innocence, ender of childhoods — was aired on NBC.

It would appear that ForAmerica’s efforts to educate the masses via social media are, thus far, unsuccessful: They were swiftly ratio’d. Over 4,000 people responded to the post, mocking the group for their outrage over a very PG expression of same-sex love.
https://thinkprogress.org/macys-parade-features-its-first-same-sex-kiss-conservative-group-is-appalled-3d833fbdc11b/

Yeah even if the plan is horrifying, like two actresses getting a PG kiss on the lips. And if you want to see the negative reviews for such an event, look no further than what the twitter reviews are saying. They hate us, they really hate us!

Not everyone was pleased, though:

“Why do these networks feel the need to make sure they show their support for the gay community,” one Twitter user asked. “Not something kids need to see.”
“You really think a dance routine ending with a lesbian kiss is appropriate FOR A THANKSGIVING PARADE?” another user asked. “Thanks for all the unexpected, uncomfortable, INAPPROPRIATE conversations that now have to take place w kids before anyone can eat.”
“NBC and Macy’s should be ashamed at this years broadcast,” another user said. “Stunning[.] Children and families were watching this. No business on TV.”
“Perhaps next yr, Macy’s [will] celebrate diversity by saluting gender fluid couples or polyamorous relationships,” another user observed.
“It is terribly sad,” another user said. “We can’t even turn on an iconic piece of Americana any more without having our children have this shoved down our throats.”
“My still fairly young children were all very excited to watch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade,” anther user opined. “We turned it on and within a few seconds the camera focused in on a prominent lesbian kiss in one of the dance numbers. My daughter’s face fell.”
https://www.theblaze.com/news/2018/11/23/lesbian-kiss-shown-nationwide-during-macys-thanksgiving-day-parade-performance-draws-cheers-jeers

Oh boo fucking hoo! And hey, the 1950s called, they want their talking point back. You know what? Let’s show the clip!

Think of those poor people crossing the border who literally have nothing, and you’re outraged by that? Turn your damn TV off and get outside once in a while and go see how the real world works! And anyone else really surprised that they are calling for a boycott? If you’re keeping score at home, that’s #320 for Trump fans, and maybe one or two for us!

Linda Harvey, the anti-LGBTQ activist who leads the group Mission America, called for a boycott of Macy’s after it allowed a same-sex kiss in the Thanksgiving Day Parade.

Caitlin Kinnunen and Isabelle McCalla, lead actors in Broadway’ The Prom musical, made Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade history on Thursday by sharing its first same-sex kiss, broadcast to millions of viewers across the U.S..

Writes Harvey, writing on the right-wing rag Lifesite: ‘This agenda is like an airborne infection that’s suddenly everywhere. From “LGBT” affirming church youth groups, to “gay”-affirming anti-bullying school lessons, to rainbow “pride” apparel sold at Target and Walmart during the spring and summer, to the obligatory pro-homosexual article in the daily newspaper, to disturbed transvestites reading to preschoolers in libraries. It seems to be critically important to stick it to our children, all in the name of phony “tolerance” and “acceptance,” embracing sins leading to personal disaster, societal destruction and spiritual death’

She adds: ‘God never makes any human to engage in what He has called an “abomination,” and always shows a way out for those who seek His loving, merciful transformation from lives of sin to lives of sanity and virtue. His design for human sexuality and marriage is beautiful and should be celebrated as a tremendous blessing on Thanksgiving. But instead, even this traditional icon of Americana, the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade, is being co-opted by whitewashed depravity….I am grieved for America and all the lost people, especially the young. I mourn the simple sweetness of mom/dad families and uncomplicated friendships, of holidays that cultivated wholesome childhood unmarred by the shadow of hateful, sexual fascism. Despite the victory that is in Jesus Christ and our ultimate destiny, before that glorious appearing, the night is coming.’
http://www.towleroad.com/2018/11/boycott-macys/

[font size="8"]NO!!!!!
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin the wheel shall we? Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Chance!

Hey all right, my luck is starting to turn! Spin it again! And it lands on “NO!!!!”. That’s right – it’s time for our new segment:

That’s right – NO! Just… fucking no! So America, don’t be fucking Nazis! And don’t be fucking Nazis, either! In an era that we live in where hate crimes, white supremacy, and dare I say it – neo Nazism are on the rise not only in America, but around the globe, is this incident something that we really need right now? I’m of course referring to that disgusting story out of Babaroo, Wisconsin where the senior class, in what’s being called a “yearbook prank”, threw up a good old fashioned Nazi salute. Yeah some casual in your face racism, that's real fucking funny guys! So in short – NO!!!!!, or should I say NEIN!!!!!

A large group of boys at a rural Wisconsin high school prom was photographed displaying what appears to be the Nazi salute, prompting international outrage and a local investigation.

In the photo, more than 50 boys from Baraboo, Wis., pose on outdoor steps. The vast majority are shown hoisting their right arms stiff and straight into the air, fingers pointed out, as Nazis did in Adolf Hitler’s Germany. One boy in the front row has his arms down but his right hand is forming the okay sign, a symbol adopted by the white power movement.

The photo was posted Sunday on Twitter by an account called @GoBaraboo, with the caption, “We even got the black kid to throw it up #BarabooProud.” That account has since been made private.

Lori M. Mueller, the Baraboo School District superintendent, wrote to parents Monday, saying the photo was taken last spring. She said it was not taken on school property or at a school-sponsored event, but others in the community said the photos were associated with the school’s junior prom.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/apparent-nazi-salute-at-prom-investigated-by-wisconsin-school-district/2018/11/12/6b6d0fa6-e691-11e8-a939-9469f1166f9d_story.html?utm_term=.3413141d37ac

Yes, NO!!!! I mean don’t be fucking Nazis. Nazism isn’t funny, it never was, nor will it ever be. And can we assume that these dudes will vote for Trump at some point? I mean we already know where they stand on the issues. Now here’s where it gets weird, and why wouldn’t it?

More than 6,000 people have signed an online petition calling on a Wisconsin school system to suspend students who appear to be giving a Nazi salute in a group photograph shot before their spring prom in May.

Administrator Lori Mueller of the Baraboo School District has said she is investigating the photo and will take appropriate action, but repeated efforts to speak with her a day after the photo was publicized Monday were not successful.

Regardless of any discipline from Baraboo High School, about 100 miles northwest of Milwaukee, the image could have far-reaching consequences for the young men pictured there, according to a university administrator.

"This could very well have an impact on their ability to get into college," said Stefanie Niles, vice president for enrollment and communications at Ohio Wesleyan University and president of the National Association for College Admission Counseling.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2018/11/14/nazi-salute-fallout-baraboo-high-school-boys-wisconsin/1997185002/

Yeah no shit! I know I wouldn’t want a fucking Nazi sitting next to me while I’m taking multi variable calculus! So really, don’t be Nazis, I cannot stress that enough. I mean if you want to see a real Nazi at work, just check out what Tomi Lahren said over the weekend:

Conservative pundit Tomi Lahren said Monday that the use of tear gas on immigrants who rushed the southern border was the “highlight” of her Thanksgiving holiday as the country “finally” defended its border.

Lahren made her comment on Twitter in a quote-tweet responding to actress Alyssa Milano’s expletive-laden message to President Donald Trump after he said Mexico would be “smart” to hinder migrant caravans before they amassed at the countries' shared border.

“Bum-rushing the border is a CHOICE and has consequences. Watching the USA FINALLY defend our borders was the HIGHLIGHT of my Thanksgiving weekend,” Lahren tweeted in response to Milano.

Lahren, a major proponent of Trump and his strict immigration policies, was praising the work of U.S. border agents on Sunday when they fired tear gas at migrants protesting at the border in Tijuana. Some of the protestors also reportedly tried to enter the country illegally, sparking the use of the tear gas, according to the Associated Press. Mexico’s Interior Ministry said roughly 500 of the migrants attempted to “violently” cross the border.
https://www.newsweek.com/fox-news-tomi-lahren-migrants-tear-gas-thanksgiving-1231582

Yeah that’s going full Nazi! I mean if the highlight of your Thanksgiving is that you got to see innocent mothers and children being gassed for wanting to live, you’re a psychopath! These are human beings escaping persecution and murderous regimes we’re talking about here, and you’re making them out to be dangerous criminals. That’s going full Hitler. But what you might not be aware of is that free speech does protect these guys. And no woman would do something that stupid, unless said woman happens to be Tomi Lahren.

The Wisconsin students who appeared to make a Nazi salute in a widely criticized photo will not be punished, the school’s superintendent said this week in a letter to parents.

The superintendent, Lori Mueller of the Baraboo School District, said in the letter that the district was “not in a position to punish the students for their actions” because of their First Amendment rights.

“As previously stated, we cannot know the intentions in the hearts of those who were involved,” Ms. Mueller wrote in the letter, which was obtained by The Baraboo News Republic.

The district investigated the episode for about 10 days with help from the police.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/24/us/baraboo-wisconsin-nazi-salute-photo.html

And by the way in case you’re wondering what the school’s official stance on this is, they plan to increase education and awareness about what Hitler did in order to prevent future incidents like this. Hey! You’re a school! You should have been educating kids about Hitler in the first place! Maybe sit all the kids in that class except for that one dude who thought that maybe this wasn’t a good idea!

A Wisconsin school district plans to host a community program after a photograph surfaced of high school boys giving what appears to be a Nazi salute.

Baraboo Superintendent Lori Mueller said in a letter to parents Wednesday that the district is in the planning stages with civic, community and faith leaders to host the program. Mueller says details will be "shared as soon as possible."

Mueller says, "We are so sorry that the actions of some of our students so understandably and deeply hurt people around the world."

The photo of about 60 boys was taken outside the Sauk County Courthouse in Baraboo last spring. About two-thirds of the boys have their right arms raised in what appears to be a Nazi salute.

The parent who took the photo says he was simply asking the teens to wave goodbye to their parents before they headed to prom.
http://www.startribune.com/wisconsin-school-district-plans-program-on-nazi-salute-image/500538401/

[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin it to win it! And it lands on… no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop!!!! Oh hey it’s a clip without context!

I think even somewhere Jesus is going “You’re doing this wrong”, Lance! Spin it again! Oh hey it’s time for People Are Dumb!

Oh man there was a lot of dumb over the holiday weekend. And there was a lot of dumb particularly in our favorite state. Yes, you know that state – the state that elected Ron DeSantis governor. So I want to start with this story out of Polk County, Florida. Here’s…. here’s my whole thing. If you are buying meth, and why wouldn’t you? It is Florida. And you want to know if your meth is legitimate or not, maybe don’t ask your doctor about quality control.

A Polk County woman was arrested earlier this month after she reportedly brought "her meth" with her to a doctor's office to have it tested.

Barbara Ray, 73, of Polk County, told the staff at the doctor's office that she had been taking meth for about a month, according to the Polk County Sheriff's Office. She said she brought the drugs with her so that she and "her meth" could be tested to make sure all was well.

The Sheriff's Office was called and a deputy responded to the office. The deputy tested the drugs and found it was in fact methamphetamine.

Ray was arrested on November 5. She was charged with 2 counts of Possession of Methamphetamine, and 2 counts of Possession of Narcotic Paraphernalia. She was booked into the Polk County Jail on Monday, November 5, 2018 and released on Wednesday, November 7, 2018.
https://www.abcactionnews.com/news/region-polk/florida-woman-brings-meth-to-doctor-s-office-to-have-it-tested-admits-to-using-for-a-month

Next up I want to bring you this cringe worthy story out of Heilongjiang, China. OK, if you want to… yeah cue the parental discretion warning, thank you sound effects guy! So here’s the thing – you’re not Johnny Mnemonic. You don’t have a USB port anywhere on you. And you especially don’t have one in your male organ area. Just… aah!!!!!!!!

For reasons yet unknown, a Chinese boy stuck a USB cable up his penis, which wound itself into a knot (the cord, not the penis), and required surgery to remove.

The 13-year-old from China’s Heilongjiang province was taken to a hospital last month, according to Singapore’s Strait Times, presumably because he couldn’t pull the cable out. How? Why? I have questions!

Apparently, the teenager cut off one side of the USB connecter before inserting it into his urethra, thank god. It measured 10 centimeters-long, and had reached his bladder, causing blood to appear in his urine, doctors said.

The Times reports that he did it all “out of curiosity.”

“From the X-ray, we can see a dead knot hence he could not pull it out himself,” Dr. Xu Liyan told local Heilongjiang Metropolis Channel.
https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/kzyabe/teenage-boy-inserts-usb-cable-into-penis-a-cautionary-tale

OK now that we got that out of the way, while we’re on the other side of the world, apparently Russia’s Troll Army has been listening to too many American conspiracy theories lately, and they’re going back to investigate whether or not the moon landing was real. Yes, 1982 called, they want their conspiracy theory back!

The head of Russia’s national space agency has proposed a mission to the moon to verify whether the American moon landings really took place.

Dmitry Rogozin responded to a question about whether Nasa’s Apollo programme actually put men on the moon back in the 1960s and 1970s during a conversation with the president of Moldova, Igor Dodon.

He appeared to be joking, as he smirked and shrugged while answering. But conspiracies surrounding Nasa’s moon missions are common in Russia.

In a video of their interaction, posted to his 815,000 Twitter followers, Mr Rogozin says: “We have set this objective to fly and verify whether they’ve been there or not”.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.independent.co.uk/news/science/russia-space-agency-nasa-us-moon-landing-mission-a8650056.html%3famp

Thankfully it wasn’t like that! Finally this week for People Are Dumb, we go to this story out of Germany. Hey look, everyone knows how awesome it is to finally land your drivers license. But that feeling can literally disappear in an instant as this kid proved in the Märkischer Kreis region of Germany.

A German teenager’s first joyride was fast and furious — until police pulled him over and took away his license.

The 18-year-old driver lost his license after 49 minutes.

“Some things hold for eternity ... some not even an hour,” German police said in statement on Tuesday.

Police clocked him at 95 km/h (59 mph) in a 50 km/h (31 mph) zone, in the Märkischer Kreis region of central north Germany.

The teen, who had been driving with four friends, was seemingly celebrating his successful driving test.
https://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/ny-news-german-teen-loses-driving-license-after-minutes-20181121-story.html

Yes, shit just got real all right! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Deep State Diaries Episode 21: The United States Census Bureau
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin the wheel one final time this week. And it lands on… t-shirt cannon! Everyone will be getting our new Top 10 Dems Take The House shirt! Yeah look at that! Spin it again! Oh hey it’s time for Deep State Diaries! Hit it!

It’s time for episode 21 of Deep State Diaries. Yes we’re touring the many, many branches and services that make up the United States government. Everything from the FBI to the IRS to the Pentagon to the CIA to the DPW to the DVA to parks and recreation and all branches and services in between. Of course if you’re here you probably already know more about our government and how it works than your average Fox News loving Trump supporter does. So that’s what this segment is going to address. We are going to do a deep dive into all that makes the United States the United States. Because we here at the Top 10 love to educate as well as entertain. Because we care.

[font size="6"]The US Census Bureau[/font]

So every 10 years the United States takes part in what’s called a census. That census answers a lot of questions about the population of the United States. And the agency that monitors this census is called the United States Census Bureau. And they’ve been in the news a lot lately because we’re two years out from the 2020 census and that is going to be very interesting to see what the end results of this questionnaire are. So why have they been in the news lately?

The number of immigrants in the U.S. without legal status has declined to its lowest level in more than a decade, according to a new report released Tuesday.

The nonpartisan Pew Research Center said 10.7 million immigrants lacked legal status in 2016, down from 11 million a year earlier and from a peak of 12.2 million in 2007 before the U.S. economy slumped.

It is the lowest number since 2004, the report said.

The decline stems largely from a drop in the number of Mexican immigrants living in the U.S. illegally to 5.5 million in 2016 from nearly 7 million in 2007. Some returned to their country to reunite with family, while others were deported.
https://www.wdam.com/2018/11/27/report-fewer-immigrants-us-without-legal-status/

Yeah sure, facts don’t matter to him! I mean who are we kidding? So why the need for something like this to come along every 10 years? Well there’s a huge story on it that is making everyone really questioning our choices so far as a country.

Lawyers for the U.S. government on Tuesday wrapped up their defense of Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross’ decision to add a citizenship question to the 2020 Census, saying he has broad latitude to run the decennial survey.

The judge hearing the case in federal court in New York promised a quick ruling.

Eighteen U.S. states, 15 cities and a slew of civil rights groups sued the administration over the plan, arguing it was intended to frighten immigrants into abstaining from the count, costing immigrant communities political representation and billions in federal aid.

Ross, a Republican, has said that citizenship data from the next census is needed to enforce federal laws against voter discrimination.
https://wsau.com/news/articles/2018/nov/27/quick-ruling-expected-as-us-census-trial-wraps-up/

No, no, no we don’t. Calm down there, chief. Did you see the previous article? Yeah so there’s been a huge decline in Mexican immigration and why should they come here if the message they’re getting told is “get the fuck out”?

Local governments are collaborating to support an accurate count in the 2020 census, partly based on a concern that the federal government will not provide enough resources to complete the task correctly.

Avoiding an undercount is paramount for myriad reasons, according to Phillip Supino, a long-range planner with the city of Aspen’s Community Development Department who has been leading the initiative.

The decennial census is “the fundamental federal exercise,” he said, with hundreds of billions of dollars allocated each year for infrastructure and essential services based on the demographic data it produces. The reapportionment of congressional and statehouse seats, which also happens every 10 years, is based on the census, meaning that a democracy that is truly representative of the population it serves is on the line.
https://www.aspendailynews.com/news/governments-collaborating-on-complete-count-in-upcoming-u-s-census/article_2aa20964-ec76-11e8-bd77-5b69937fd37c.html

Yeah probably. I mean accurate, schmacurate. What’s to stop this administration from fucking with the numbers and saying that everyone is white and religious? Oh wait, let’s not give them any ideas! But where else are you going to learn crazy stats about Americans like this?

Utahns are a mobile bunch. One of every six changed residences in 2017, according to new U.S. Census Bureau estimates released Tuesday.

That is higher than the national average — 16.3 percent to 13.7 — and ranks No. 10 among the states. One of the reasons for that is religious: the high number of Utahns who move to serve missions for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

“That is a cultural imperative that is not present in other places” and helps make Utahns among the nation’s most frequent movers, said Pam Perlich, director of demographic research at the University of Utah’s Kem C. Gardner Policy Institute.
https://www.sltrib.com/news/politics/2018/11/27/utahns-move-more-than/

Ah, I love “The Book Of Mormon”. Or what about this?

Dating back 2,000 years to the Celtic festival of Samhain, Halloween is an ancient tradition associated with images of witches, ghosts and vampires. Today, Halloween has evolved into a celebration characterized by child-friendly activities like trick-or-treating, carving pumpkins into jack-o’-lanterns, and dressing in costumes.

The following facts from the U.S. Census Bureau are made possible by the invaluable responses to the U.S. Census Bureau’s surveys, according to a Census Bureau news release.

"We appreciate the public’s cooperation as we continuously measure America’s people, places and economy," the release stated.
https://www.newsandtribune.com/news/the-business-of-boos-census-bureau-provides-halloween-facts/article_09468e5c-dd35-11e8-b07b-37f13356acc1.html

But nah, in this increasingly white supremacist climate, this is the most alarming news of all! The horror, the horror I tell you!

The graphic was splashy by the Census Bureau’s standards and it showed an unmistakable moment in America’s future: the year 2044, when white Americans were projected to fall below half the population and lose their majority status.

The presentation of the data disturbed Kenneth Prewitt, a former Census Bureau director, who saw it while looking through a government report. The graphic made demographic change look like a zero-sum game that white Americans were losing, he thought, and could provoke a political backlash.

So after the report’s release three years ago, he organized a meeting with Katherine Wallman, at the time the chief statistician for the United States.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/22/us/white-americans-minority-population.html

[font size="6"]Score Card [/font]

Overall importance: A
How Things Are Going: B
Likely hood To Survive: B+

Overall: B

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

Next week we’re heading to Langley, Virginia to hang with the Central Intelligence Agency! I would tell you more, but I might have to kill you.

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Mike Shinoda[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is one of the heads of the band known as Linkin Park, his debut album is called “Post Traumatic” and you can see him at the KROQ Christmas Show December 8th at the Forum. Playing his song called “Running From My Shadow”, give it up for Mike Shinoda!

Thank you Phoenix! We had a great time here, we are back home next week for our third anniversary special edition! See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Tempe Improv, Tempe, AZ
Special Thanks To: Improv Group
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: Arizona State University Choir Club, Phoenix, AZ
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
Mike Shinoda Appears Courtesy Of: Warner Bros Records
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: [email protected]

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

November 21, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots Best Of #6: Thanksgiving Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots Best Of #6: Thanksgiving Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! As you know by now this week is Thanksgiving, so naturally we’re off and going to be running another Best Of Edition. So while you’re enjoying Turkey Day and drinking large quantities of conservative tears in your cheaply imported coffee mugs, enjoy this best of the Top 10. For all the great stuff that we’ve been up to here and there’s things that slipped through the cracks. So for those of you who regularly follow the Top 10 through the year you know we’ve been touring a lot this year going to cities and meeting awesome liberals in all of these cities. As far as the tour goes, we’ve only got a few weeks left in the crazy year that is 2018 and we’ve still got to hit Arizona, Denver, and do a couple of home shows before going to our big London show on December 12th at the 99 Club in Leicester Square. That said, we recently announced a wave of 2019 tour dates and here’s where we are tentatively headed but things can be subject to change at any minute. So here is the schedule so far:

1/3/19 – Dark (Best Of) – New Year’s
1/9/19 – Portland, OR – McMenamin’s Bagdad Theater (Season Premiere)
1/16/19 – Seattle, WA - Comedy Underground (rescheduled from 9/5)
1/24/19 – Las Vegas, NV – Jokester’s Fremont St.
1/30/19 – Salt Lake City, UT – Wiseguys
2/6/19 – Anaheim, CA – Podfest LA @ Anaheim Convention Center
2/13/19 – Oxnard, CA – Levity Live (Valentine’s Day Special!)
2/20/19 - Ontario, CA - Ontario Improv
2/27/19 – Hollywood, CA – UCB Theater Franklin St
3/6/19 – Hollywood, CA – UCB Theater Franklin St(Stupidest State Contest – Selection Sunday)
3/13/19 - Hollywood, CA – UCB Theater Franklin St. (Stupidest State Round 1 Match 1)
3/20/19 – Atlanta, GA – Punchline Comedy Club (Stupidest State Round 1 Match 2)
3/27/19 – Tampa, FL – Tampa Improv (Stupidest State Round 1 Match 3)
4/3/19 – Washington, DC – DC Improv (Stupidest State Round 1 Match 4)
4/10/19 – New York City, NY – Grammercy Theater (Stupidest State Round 2 Match 1)
4/17/19 – Dark (Best Of - Spring Break / Easter)
4/24/19 – Denver, CO – Colorado Podcast Festival (Stupidest State Round 2 Match 2)
5/1/19 – San Diego, CA – American Comedy Co. (Stupidest State Round 2 Match 3)
5/8/19 – Missoula, MT – Big Sky Brewery (Stupidest State Round 2 Match 4)
5/15/19 – Long Beach, CA – Laugh Factory (Stupidest State Final Four)
5/22/19 – Hollywood, CA – UCB Theater Franklin St (Stupidest State Finals / Season Finale)

OK that’s enough of the intro, we have a lot of idiocy to get to. But first we have to play the Bill Maher new rule where he compares Trump to the Old Testament god:

So where do we begin for this best of edition? In the first slot, from Idiots #5-8, we take a look at the conspiracy theory known as Q-Anon since it has become a mainstream fixture at Trump rallies across the country, even though we all know it’s grade A bullshit. In the second slot, from Idiots #5-6, Dennis Rodman gets a rare +1 for his next visit to North Korea and he wants to bring none other than Trump’s BFF Kanye West, and we explore the possibilities of a Harold And Kumar style adventure. In the 3rd slot, from Idiots #5-19, we delve into the epically failed plot to take down Mueller by a fake intelligence agency spearheaded by Trump superfans Jacob Wohl and Jack Berman, and it has all the makings of a good Wes Anderson flick or a terrible Coen Bros one. In the fourth slot, from Idiots #5-12, Stormy Daniels has officially ruined the collective childhood of 90s kids everywhere. Yeah, take that what you will! At number 5, from Idiots #5-11, our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates takes a look at a growing feud between Tesla founder Elon Musk and the heroic deep sea divers who rescued those kids from that cave in Thailand. And at number 6, in our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit”, from Idiots #5-14, our resident pastor is going to take a look at an insane new documentary from Liberty University called “The Trump Prophecy” starring crackpot Mark Taylor. Taking the 7th slot, from Idiots #5-13, it’s almost October, which prompts Explaining Jokes To Idiots takes a look at sexy Halloween costumes! Do we really need the sexy whatever? Find out! Taking the 8th slot, from Idiots #5-9, “This Fucking Guy” takes a look at dueling Christian conspiracy theorists Lance Wallnau and Rick Wiles. At number 9 (NEIN!!!) from Idiots #5-16 is “I Need A Drink” and we need a few drinks to tell you about Kanye West’s epic cyber security fail and how we’re not at all surprised that his passcode is 00000. Finally this week, from Idiots #5-10, Deep State Diaries is going to take a look at the government institution that everyone loves to hate, the Department Of Motor Vehicles, and we encourage you to do your best impression of Patty & Selma here. And we’re going to close with that time we had AWOLNATION on from Idiots #5-6. Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Qanon
[br] [/font] [br]

From Idiots #5-8

Hey everybody! It’s time for the WHEEL OF CORRUPTION! YAY!!!!!

Of course you know the rules by now – I spin the wheel and we have to talk about whatever it lands on. Of course if it lands on the guacamole option, you know that it costs $1.50 extra. So here’s what is on the wheel this week:

- Guns
- Abortion
- Crime
- Poverty
- Sex
- Chance
- 5,000
- Infowars
- Nazis
- Go Directly To Jail
- Buy A Vowel
- The Trumper Games
- Lawsuits
- Whammy
- Donald Trump
- People Are Dumb
- ‘Merica!
- How Is This Still A Thing?
- A Random Tweet
- 10,000
- Community Chest
- Talk Shows
- Clip Without Context
- Something Random In The News
- Fox News
- Top 10 Investigates
- Polls
- Chance
- Nukes
- Civility
- Intermission
- Deep State Diaries
- 15,000
- Bankrupt
- Morally Bankrupt
- Golf
- The GOP
- Butter Beer
- Community Chest
- Florida (Obviously)
- This Fucking Guy
- Beating A Dead Horse
- Holy Shit
- Guacamole ($1.50 Extra)
- Harry Potter
- T-Shirt Cannon
- ? (Mystery Item)
- I Need A Drink
- Lightning Round
- Bonus Spin

Let’s get this going! Spin that shit! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy stop! Clip without context!

Sure, go after the underground pedophiles, but what about the above ground ones, Mark? Like you know – those in your own party! If you’re going to get serious about this, get fucking serious! Spin it again! And it lands on… sex! So we got to talk about it, it’s the 800 pound gorilla in the room. It’s of course the conspiracy theory known as Qanon. We’ve brought up Q before but this week it finally came out of the conspiracy theory closet and hit the mainstream media big time.

QAnon is the latest high-profile and spectacularly dumb right-wing conspiracy theory. Here's everything you didn't want to have to know about it.

If you're lucky, before last week you had only ever heard of QAnon from some of Roseanne Barr's less racist tweets. Because it was possible to live your life completely unaware of the new, dumb conspiracy theory taking off online until it finally spilled over into the real world thanks to Donald Trump. Recently, people who buy into QAnon have been visibly showing up at Trump rallies and campaign events, wearing T-shirts and signs to show that they're in the know and they support a president who is supposed to be secretly fighting an international ring of billionaire pedophiles.

But if you're one of those lucky people who doesn't spend lurking on or reading about the seedier parts of the Internet, QAnon is likely a big mystery for you. None of us want to have to know about this thing. But since it's spilling into the real world now, here are some of the basics about this convoluted and elaborate conspiracy.

What exactly does "QAnon" mean?

The whole thing started on 4chan. An anonymous user going by "Q," a reference to the highest level of security clearance, began posting in October of last year. According to Q, who claims to be one or more people high in the Trump administration, all past presidents have been involved in shadowy criminal dealings centered mostly on an international pedophile ring and a global sex trade of child slaves. Featuring prominently in this are the usual boogeyman: Barack Obama, the Clintons, George Soros, the whole gang.

Is that not Pizzagate?

It sounds a lot like it, doesn't it? Think Pizzagate but bigger, more complicated, and dumber. In fact, this is a pretty boiled down explanation considering how complex and grandiose the whole conspiracy is.
https://www.gq.com/story/what-the-hell-is-qanon

And yes if you do believe in the Qanon conspiracy theory, I have a bag of magic beans to sell you for $9.99, what do they do? They’re magic! So here’s a good question – how did the republicans get to be the party of batshit crazy, off the wall conspiracy theories?

When people started showing up at recent Trump rallies waving signs with giant “Q”s on them and making references to QAnon, a conspiracy theory to end all conspiracy theories, members of the press, and no doubt many people at home, were puzzled. Aren’t things crazy enough already without this fresh new lunacy? The trouble is that this is neither the first nor the last absolutely bonkers conspiracy theory to infiltrate today’s GOP, getting both literally and figuratively within a few feet of the president of the United States. In fact, it would have been more surprising if the Republican Party wasn’t overrun with conspiracy theorists.

It’s hard to do justice to the intricate madness of what QAnon is about in a concise manner, but I’ll let Molly Roberts give it a shot:

The simplest description of the plot line goes something like this: President Trump isn’t under investigation; he is only pretending to be, as part of a countercoup to restore power to the people after more than a century of governmental control by a globalist cabal. Also, there are pedophiles.

A figure named “Q,” who supposedly possesses Q-level security clearance, disperses “crumbs” that “bakers” bring together to create a “dough” of synthesized information. (This is not how baking works, but that seems the least of our worries.) Because Q is the 17th letter in the alphabet and 17 is also a number Trump has said a few times, among other clearly-not-coincidences, he is the real deal, not an Internet troll engaged in an elaborate example of live-action role-play.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/plum-line/wp/2018/08/06/why-the-gop-is-so-easily-infiltrated-by-bonkers-conspiracy-theorists/?utm_term=.fc5cac586357

And you should always listen to Dave Grohl too, for he is wise in the ways of the world! But this might be my favorite story related to Qanon, and who better to explain a batshit crazy conspiracy theory than batshit crazy conspiracy theorists? I mean if you thought the previous people were too stupid to insult, I give you Liz Crokin:

Last weekend, right-wing “journalist” and fringe conspiracy theorist Liz Crokin did an interview with online psychic and YouTube host Jenny Moonstone in which she laid out her theory that John F. Kennedy Jr. faked his own death in 1999 and is now behind the QAnon account.

QAnon is an anonymous figure at the center of a right-wing conspiracy theory known as “The Storm” that alleges that high-ranking members of the Trump administration have been using the 8Chan forum board to drop hints revealing that Robert Muller’s special counsel investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election is really cover for a secret operation to take down a global network of satanic pedophile cannibals. Proponents of this conspiracy theory have increasingly been making their presence known at Trump rallies.

In a video posted by Moonstone on Sunday, Crokin explained her theory that JFK Jr. has been running the QAnon account all along, insisting that any mockery she receives, or attacks she endures, for promoting her absurd ideas is proof that she is right.

Crokin asserted that when she first heard the theory of JFK Jr. being behind the QAnon account, “it immediately resonated with me, I got goosebumps everywhere. I’m a very intuitive person and usually when that happens, that’s confirmation that there is truth to it.”

“Q at one point said, ‘You’re not going to believe who you are talking to here,'” Crokin said. “When Q wrote that, I thought it’s going to be someone that’s so crazy that even people that are woke and know what’s going on are going to be like, ‘Oh my lord, this is insane’ … John F. Kennedy Jr., that would be shocking because we all think he’s dead.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/liz-crokin-john-f-kennedy-jr-faked-his-death-and-is-now-qanon/

That is a good point sir! I mean really you can’t get much more stupid than that! And not only is it underground pedophiles, it’s also satanic pedophiles too. I mean not unlike Kevin Spacey. Hey o!!!!!!!!!!!!! And by the way, you might be asking yourself “Who Is Q?”. Well now we have a face – the pedo patrol has got right on the case! I give you… *drum roll* this guy!

With the appearance of numerous sign-waving supporters at a Trump rally last week, the world at large was introduced to a far-right conspiracy theory known as QAnon. Until recently, QAnon stuff remained in the dark corners of 4chan, 8chan, and Reddit, but as it continues to spill into mainstream news coverage, we’re forced to hear about all the dumb shit these people are actually doing. According to a new report from The Daily Beast, that dumb shit now includes lionizing some minor player from Vanderpump Rules as a “Hollywood whistleblower.”

For those who have managed to remain blissfully unaware, QAnon is a far-reaching, multi-faceted conspiracy that claims—among other things—that President Trump and Robert Mueller are actually working together to take down a massive pedophile ring run by Hollywood celebrities and major Democratic Party players. “Deep state” secrets are leaked to supporters courtesy of an anonymous message board user named “Q.” Relying on cryptic information from an anonymous source has primed QAnon followers to believe pretty much anything from anyone, including Vanderpump Rules actor Isaac Kappy, who appeared on Infowars recently to accuse Tom Hanks and Seth Green of being secret Illuminati pedophiles.
https://news.avclub.com/the-hot-new-face-of-qanon-is-some-fucking-guy-from-vand-1828132542

[font size="8"]Dennis Rodman
[br] [/font] [br]
From Idiots #5-6

OK so you’re Dennis Rodman and you and everyone’s favorite, loveable mass murdering dictator Kim Jong Un are like this, and he finally gives you that +1 invite that you’ve been clamoring for, for many years now, who do you bring along? Well, Mr. Rodman has one person in particular that he’d like to bring along on his next diplomatic mission.

Earlier this month, Kanye West tweeted an image of a Chicago Bulls jersey signed by Dennis Rodman with the caption, “One of my biggest inspirations… always breaking barriers with independent thought.”

Now, in a new interview, Rodman thanked the rapper and said that he planned to invite West to North Korea, where the former NBA star has struck up an unlikely friendship with the hermit state’s dictator, Kim Jong-un. “Kanye, he’s doing amazing work around the world so I respect him too,” Rodman told Us Weekly. “So hopefully one day we’ll get together and collaborate on certain things. Guess what, I’ll take Kanye West to North Korea with me.”

Rodman continued, suggesting the rapper might be inspired to record an album by the experience. “Matter of fact, I’m going to invite him next time I go to North Korea. If the door’s open in September, I will invite Kanye West with me to go to North Korea with me… If he wants to make an album about that, he’ll be there for like six to seven days, and he’ll see what’s going on. Now, go make a song about this. So here you go.”
https://www.highsnobiety.com/p/dennis-rodman-kanye-north-korea-album/

I'm not sure if I should be thrilled that Dennis and Kanye are having a bromance, or if I can't wait for the movie Dennis & Kanye Go To Pyongyang Palace? Thank you Kansas City! But there’s more to this three-way bromance and it doesn’t involve Kim Jong Un.

Kanye West and Dennis Rodman bonded over Chicago (the city – not West’s youngest daughter) and the ex-NBA star sent the rapper a pretty sweet gift afterward.

Rodman tells The Blast that he met Kanye at the March for Our Lives rally in DC a few months ago. The two stars took a pic together, and after the rally, The Worm said he wanted to send Yeezy a personalized and signed jersey, being that he was a big fan.

Rodman, of course, famously played for the Bulls during their heyday and, West was raised in Chi-town.

Rodman tells The Blast that he met Kanye at the March for Our Lives rally in DC a few months ago. The two stars took a pic together, and after the rally, The Worm said he wanted to send Yeezy a personalized and signed jersey, being that he was a big fan.

Rodman, of course, famously played for the Bulls during their heyday and, West was raised in Chi-town.
Dennis Rodman Kanye West

A source tells us that Rodman always respected West for being a “free spirit,” like himself, and remembered when the rapper dyed his hair blonde a few years back like Rodman did back in the mid 90’s.
https://theblast.com/dennis-rodman-kanye-west-jersey-chicago-bulls/

Wait, whoa whoa whoa. Back up! Beep beep! Didn’t Kanye recently come out as a hardcore Trump supporter (see Top 10 #4-16 )a few months ago? What was he doing at the March For Our Lives? This is something that Trump supporters wouldn’t touch with a 10 foot pole. Come on, Kanye, if you’re going to be overtly political, at least be consistent with your beliefs! So Mr. Rodman’s politics haven’t exactly won him a lot of fans lately.

A number of jokes during the evening from the roasters involved Donald Trump, Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey.

The ex-basketball star and reality TV personality struggled through most of his time on Saturday during the taping of the roast in Hollywood.

It got particularly tense when Rodman made a joke about the North Korean leader and his pal, Kim Jong-un.

Trying to give Willis a hard time about some of his movie choices, Rodman said, "You keep making these bomb movies like Kim, but at least he is smart enough not to release his."

That did not go over well and elicited boos.

Rodman struggled in general and apologized a number of times to the audience and guests onstage as he flubbed his lines.
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/dennis-rodman-booed-at-bruce-willis-roast-1127188

No I’m pretty sure they’re booing you. But here’s the other weird thing – so Rodman wants to bring everyone’s favorite fun loving dictator to the US – to watch a Knicks game of all things!

Next up for Dennis Rodman — bringing Kim Jong Un and James Dolan together.

The NBA Hall of Famer tells the Daily News that if Kim visits the United States, he hopes to bring the North Korean dictator to see the Knicks and meet their leader.

“The first thing he wants to do is go to a Knicks game — he wants to go to Madison Square Garden,” according to Rodman.

Now the lead adviser of Business Development for anytickets.com, The Worm is in charge of coordinating VIP outings for the lifestyle brand. He’s confident he can make it happen.

“If you want to go to a Knicks game and meet Dolan, you can go meet him,” Rodman said of his plan to broker a summit.
http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/ny-ent-dennis-rodman-james-dolan-kim-jung-un-20180626-story.html#

[font size="8"]Surefire Intelligence
[br] [/font] [br] ‘

From: [link: | Idiots #5-19]

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know that there was a plot by two rabid Trump fans – Jacob Wohl and Jack Berkman – to take down Robert Mueller. And it involved using the “#MeToo” movement as a weapon. Well, it turned out to be quite the colossal fail. Which is a huge step up from the epic fail – and the more you dig into this story the weirder it gets. And I mean that’s an understatement. This story was MADE for the Top 10. Let’s dig into it.

To which I’m sure that even Hans Landa right now is going WTF! So let’s break it down. It’s almost like a Wes Anderson movie. Yeah can we get some music? And I need a guy who kind of sounds like Alec Baldwin. So they’ve got quirky characters, a two tone color scheme, and a plot that went horribly, horribly wrong. 20 year old stock broker wunderkind Jacob Wohl – who got banned from the practice due to shady business dealings, ran an equally shady “intelligence firm” out of his mom’s basement and ran offices he didn’t have using employees he didn’t hire. Sounds legit. In the grand scheme of Trump fans I'm not sure who the bigger buffoon is - Jacob Wohl and Surefire Intelligence or Alex Jones?

https://twitter.com/RightWingWatch/status/1058442443677450241

No, it's definitely Alex Jones. At least it's a step up from yelling at a pile of poop! But really not that big of a step. But Wohl definitely stepped in some shit. What else could go wrong?

In the conference room of a Holiday Inn just outside Washington, D.C., Jacob Wohl and Jack Burkman, GOP operatives of a sort, gathered reporters for their unveiling of a spectacular and unsubstantiated claim: that Robert Mueller, the special prosecutor appointed to investigate possible links between the Trump administration and figures tied to the Russian Federation’s interference in the 2016 election, was a sexual predator (a claim that not even Trump lawyer Rudy Giuliani believes).

The claims, while flimsy at best, were used to allege a double-standard between their client and Christine Blasey Ford, who accused Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh of sexually assaulting her at a party when they were in high school, in order to prove that mainstream press is “doing the bidding” of Mueller.

Wohl is a 20-year-old disgraced former hedge fund manager who earned a lifetime ban on futures trading and has since turned himself into a Trump-supporting conspiracy theorist online. Wohl emerged from pro-Trump conspiracy circles online to join Burkman, a longtime conservative con-man with a show on Newsmax TV, to put forward claims to the press that Mueller “brutally raped” a woman in New York City in 2010. The claims were published by The Gateway Pundit, a right-wing clickbait website with a large online presence, where Wohl was cited as a contributor as recently as six days ago.

Mueller has referred the apparent smear scheme to the Federal Bureau of Investigation. When Wohl and Burkman were asked by someone who did not identify themselves at the back of the room whether they were ready to go to prison, the pair responded, “No.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/fly-unzipped-jack-burkman-and-jacob-wohl-make-laughable-smear-claims-against-mueller/

They gave a press conference with their fly down! Holy fucking god, even the best comedy writers in the world couldn’t make this stuff up! So for the movie I’m thinking that Taron Egerton would be great for Wohl, and maybe Jonah Hill for Berkman. Call me, casting directors! So how did they get caught? Well, it turns out that they used a picture of actor Christoph Waltz for one of their employees. It gets better and better!

One of the weirdest stories to come down the pike in some time involves right-wing conspiracy theorist and radio host Jack Burkman and 20-year-old hedge fund owner and Donald Trump supporter Jacob Wohl banding together to discredit special counsel Robert Mueller with allegations of sexual assault. Linking Burkman and Wohl to one another didn’t take too long — and, Surefire Intelligence, a “private intel agency that designs and executes bespoke solutions for businesses and individuals who face complex challenges,” had everything to do with that.

The whispers that allegations would enter the mainstream turned into shouts, as Burkman posted a video teasing a Thursday press conference where he would “reveal the first of Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s sex assault victims.” That press conference did take place today, but no accuser came forward.

So, what part does Surefire Intelligence play in all of this? On Oct. 30, the same day the rumors started swirling, Wohl said that “several media sources” told him the story would break.

Also on the same day, the accusations were published on the right-wing fringe site Gateway Pundit and it was revealed that this private investigation firm, Surefire Intelligence, was investigating claims of sexual assault. The Surefire Intelligence Twitter account, which was created in April 2018, also had something to say on social media in response to a “flurry of press inquiries.”

But in the weeks leading up to that, Surefire Intelligence was already on the radars of various media members, it’s been reported. It didn’t take long for media members to dig deeper and out Surefire Intelligence as Wohl’s operation, despite his initial denial of involvement.

“I don’t have any involvement in any investigations of any kind. I’m not quite that cool,” he said — even thought Burkman had already admitted Wohl’s involvement elsewhere.

Not only was it discovered that an email address with Wohl’s name on it ([email protected] )was linked to the domain registration of Surefire Intelligence, profiles for purported employees of the firm were transparently fictitious. Managing partner “Matthew Cohen‘s” profile featured a picture that was quickly found to be a photo of Wohl.

Most comically, reverse image searches revealed that other profiles contained photos that were just edited images of famous people, Israeli supermodel Bar Refaeli and Hollywood star Christoph Waltz included.

Aric Toler wrote the most comprehensive story on how Surefire Intelligence was traced to Wohl.
https://lawandcrime.com/high-profile/the-hilariously-simple-way-surefire-intelligence-was-outed-as-jacob-wohls-operation/

You tell ‘em, Master Yoda! Really, if you’re setting up a sting operation, maybe don’t use your real name or e-mail address? I’m just speculating! But really this is just a colossal fail on every level. And in case you’re wondering just how shady Surefire Intelligence is, just take a look at what they did to this woman who was looking for her stolen truck.

Julienne Adams began to suspect something was awry with Surefire Intelligence when all of its phone numbers suddenly disconnected.

Adams, a 35-year-old Washington state native, had hired the private investigations firm to recover damages for a truck she says was stolen. She had found Surefire through postings on Craigslist, where it billed its impressive roster of former Israeli intelligence agents and other experts in financial and criminal investigations. Its website appeared to be legitimate, and Adams even found a pair of glowing writeups about the company on the publishing platform Medium. She eventually ponied up $1,200 for Surefire’s services.

Adams had spoken with the firm’s ostensible managing partner, Matthew Cohen, last Friday, and he was optimistic about recovering tens of thousands of dollars from the man whom Adams accused of stealing her Hummer. They were scheduled for an in-person meeting in Portland, Oregon, near her home in southern Washington, on Tuesday.

Then the whole thing blew up. Cohen, it turns out, doesn’t actually exist. His real name is Jacob Wohl, and he’s a pro-Trump twitter troll and former teenage hedge fund manager with the dubious distinction of being the youngest person ever to earn a lifetime trading ban from the National Futures Association.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/jacob-wohls-fake-pi-firm-ghosted-on-a-destitute-woman-looking-for-her-stolen-truck

?itemid=4222541

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font] [br]

From: Idiots #5-12

So yeah if you woke up yesterday and turned on your phone and saw Twitter, you might have seen Mario Kart trending. You remember the game if you’re a 90s kid like I am. It’s the game where your goal was to drive as fast as possible to lap your opponent and if you didn’t, just even screwing around on the game was fun. In fact here’s a scene of the game being played.

Now here’s where it gets disturbing. It of course involves Stormy Daniels and Trump, because, why wouldn’t it? And Stormy makes a particularly disturbing revelation that makes us never want to play Mario Kart ever again.

Millions of Nintendo fans on Twitter were horrified earlier today when they learned precisely why Mario Kart was trending on the popular social media platform, and that it had nothing to do with a new edition of the popular racing video game series.

It all began with an appearance by adult film actress Stormy Daniels on The View to promote her upcoming tell-all book Full Disclosure. Daniels became a national name following a federal investigation into claims that she had an affair with President Donald Trump, and that his lawyer, Michael Cohen, had violated campaign finance laws by paying Daniels $130,000 in hush money in order to keep the story quiet leading up the 2016 election. Trump initially denied advance knowledge of Cohen's payment to Daniels - although a conversation recorded without his consent by Cohen would later prove otherwise - and says the affair didn't happen. Daniels contends that the affair did happen, and is currently suing Trump for defamation of character after he called her a liar.

Huffington Post reported on Daniels' interview, and the resulting turmoil online after she compared a portion of President Trump's anatomy to “the mushroom character in Mario Kart.” The site also re-posted the colorful responses of many other Twitter users, and their horrified reactions after they discovered why Toad and Mario Kart were trending topics. Making this all the more darkly comedic was the amusing response from Nintendo Life's Twitter account, which can be viewed below.
https://screenrant.com/trump-toad-mario-kart-meme/

Yes, no indeed! But come on, Nintendo’s lovable mascot doesn’t deserve this! I mean what did Toad do to deserve that comparison? All he does is travel the Mushroom Kingdom and give you things. Come on, Stormy. Seriously, don’t mess with the Toad Brigade!

However, if you already have an inkling of why Toad is suddenly trending and you need a little more context, well, we’re sorry, but we’re here for you.

This story begins with the Guardian publishing excerpts from porn actress and director Stormy Daniels’s forthcoming tell-all book, Full Disclosure, about her alleged past affair with Donald Trump. The book apparently contains a graphic description of a sexual encounter with Trump, including a detailed description of the president’s penis.

I’m about to quote it. You’ve been warned.

“It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool,” Daniels writes. “I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart.”

Though the book also contains mentions of Daniels’s impression that Trump never wanted to be president, and of her $130,000 hush agreement, it’s the description of Trump’s genitalia that has dominated the discussion around the excerpts.

For those of you who have never touched a Nintendo console in your life, Toad is indeed a little mushroom man, whose mushroom cap (ugh) was confirmed to be part of his head and not just a hat by Super Mario Odyssey producer Yoshiaki Koizumi earlier this year.

And while he’s a bit gormless, Toad doesn’t deserve to be a part of this discourse: He is a perfectly fine playable character in Mario Kart, he runs Mario Party, and he generally tries to help out in every other Mario franchise game, going all the way back to 1985’s Super Mario Bros.
https://www.vox.com/2018/9/18/17874168/toad-stormy-daniels-trump-mario-kart

Thanks Stormy, while we’re all rooting for you to take down this horrible regime currently occupying the White House, you forever ruined one of our favorite video games. I can’t even think about Mario now without picturing Toad looking like a penis. And I was playing Mario Odyssey last night. So if you’re playing Mario Kart, who should you pick now that Toad has been ruined forever?

Tuesday began like any other in the Mushroom Kingdom: With Princess Peach presiding over her loyal subjects, and a collection of troublemakers wreaking havoc. But for once, it's not Bowser drawing up the negative headlines that usually accompany his hijinks in the Mario universe, because the formerly innocent Toad was compared to the the President of the United States' dick by Stormy Daniels.

This stunning revelation has been devastating for Toad fans, including our very own Kevin Nguyen:

Toad has long been an ideal selection in Mario Kart, since he's both adorable and speedy as hell. Do not despair, though. We've compiled a brief collection of suitable replacement characters to choose from if the phallic imagery Toad now inspires has you questioning your Mario Kart-playing experience/entire childhood. (To be clear, this isn't a boycott of Toad. It's an exercise in self care.)

Princess Peach

She's one of the few characters who's appeared in every iteration of Mario Kart, and many of the other mainstays either don't have similar driver characteristics to Toad, or have disqualifying mustaches. Her Mario Kart Wiki page notes that her "performance is notably on par with Toad." That's more than enough empirical evidence from a trusted source to make the switch. Another worthy reason: In Super Smash Bros, Peach has long been using Toad as a shield/attack counter, so clearly she realized a while ago that he's expendable. That foresight deserves to be rewarded.
https://www.gq.com/story/poor-toad

Yeah next time you play Mario Kart, choose Princess Peach before someone else does! After all, she floats in the air! Assuming that giant hoop skirt doesn’t get in the way! But really this is one of those things that’s better left where we don’t want to know why it’s trending. Excuse me, I need to go take a cold shower after reading this.

In a tell-all memoir, the pornographic actor Stormy Daniels details salacious descriptions of her time with Donald Trump, wonders if he is fit to be president and claims that he offered to cheat for her in his reality TV show.

A copy of the book, Full Disclosure, was obtained by the Guardian. In it, Daniels describes her mounting disbelief as Trump began to win primary contests in 2016 for the Republican presidential nomination. Former castmates whom she had not heard from in years, but who had heard her story about sleeping with Trump in 2006, would call her up to marvel at the news.

“It will never happen, I would say,” Daniels writes. “He doesn’t even want to be president.”

But as Trump kept winning, she writes, she began to think she might be in danger. The story she had to tell about Trump seemed more sensitive the more he won. And she had already been threatened once, years earlier, and warned never to tell the story about Trump, she has claimed.
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/sep/18/stormy-daniels-tell-all-book-on-trump-salacious-detail-and-claims-of-cheating

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Elon Musk Vs Cave Rescuers
[br] [/font] [br]

From: Idiots #5-11

San Jose it’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

In 2018 we have had a lot of crazy incidents but none was more horrifying than when a group of children and adults were trapped in a cave in Thailand. While the group was rescued without incident, it drew people from all over the world who offered to help. Everyone from the US Marine Corps to the Tesla Motor Corporation offered to help rescue the trapped. Unfortunately it’s the latter that is still causing problems over why his solution wasn’t the chosen one, even though it could have spelled a potential disaster:

The British caver who masterminded the rescue of 12 boys trapped in Thailand is to take legal action over Elon Musk’s latest slur that he is a “child rapist”.

Vernon Unsworth told The Times the billionaire’s allegations he had a child bride and had moved to an area notorious for child sex trafficking were “100 per cent” untrue and “very hurtful”.

The financial broker from St Albans, Hertfordshire, is preparing to start legal action imminently against the tycoon.

He is considering using the courts in Thailand, which could lead to Mr Musk receiving a jail sentence. Libel can be a criminal offence in the country and can result in a lengthy prison term.

Mr Unsworth is also considering defamation proceedings in London and the United…
https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/british-cave-diver-vernon-unsworth-to-sue-elon-musk-after-new-rant-5jndzmjhs

Yes this is 2018 here, Elon, this is when things like Pizzagate and Qanon have hit the spotlight and got child rape and pedophilia in the news. By calling this man a pedophile, you are downplaying the horrible nature of these crimes. But he won’t shut up about this and in fact is doubling down:

Elon Musk has escalated his baseless attacks against a British diver, claiming without evidence that the man who helped rescue children from a cave in Thailand was a “child rapist” in an email to a reporter.

The embattled Tesla CEO faced widespread backlash in July when he first called the diver Vernon Unsworth a “pedo” in a tweet – an unfounded claim against a man who was part of the international team that freed 12 young footballers and their coach from the Tham Luang cave complex. Musk, who had unsuccessfully attempted to assist the rescue mission, eventually apologized to Unsworth.

On Tuesday, however, BuzzFeed published two new emails from Musk, in which he called a journalist who has written about the dispute a “fucking asshole” and he launched new extraordinary claims against Unsworth, without providing documentation to support the allegations.

Musk called Unsworth a “single white guy from England who’s been traveling to or living in Thailand for 30 to 40 years”, alleging that he had moved to Chiang Rai “for a child bride who was about 12 years old at the time”. He asserted that the city was “renowned for child sex-trafficking”.
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2018/sep/04/elon-musk-claims-diver-in-thai-cave-rescue-is-child-rapist-without-evidence

Yes, this whole story is a giant pile of suck. Does Elon *WANT* to get sued? And in case you are wondering what Elon Musk is smoking, well, he must be either smoking some really good shit, or some really horrible shit.

Tesla shares fell more than 6 percent on Friday, after top executives resigned and CEO Elon Musk appeared to smoke pot in a video.

It wouldn't be the first time that investors were rattled by Musk's unconventional ways, sending stocks haywire.

Musk, 47, appeared on The Joe Rogan Experience on Thursday night. Over 2 1/2 hours, Musk discussed technology, unsheathed a sword and accepted what Rogan, a stand-up comedian, described as marijuana inside of tobacco.

"You probably can't because of stockholders, right?" Rogan said.

"I mean it's legal, right?" Musk said before smoking the joint. They were sitting inside a studio in California, where medical and recreational marijuana use is indeed legal.
https://www.npr.org/2018/09/08/645845232/tesla-stock-dropped-as-elon-musk-apparently-smoked-up

Apparently, he did want to get high, and he got high on the Joe Rogan show. Which means he must have been smoking something when he launched those attacks against Mr. Unsworth. By the way he must have been violating his own company’s code of ethics, right?

Elon Musk may have violated his company’s code of business conduct and ethics after he was captured smoking marijuana with podcast extraordinary Joe Rogan on Thursday, a report stated.

CNBC reported the Tesla CEO's public puffing could hurt his professional career.

"Tesla also asks that you do your part by following safety and health rules and practices and reporting (either openly or confidentially) accidents or any unsafe equipment, behavior (such as use of illegal drugs) or conditions to your manager, supervisor, Human Resources or the Legal Department," the company's code of business conduct and ethics states. "Violence and threatening behavior are not permitted, and under no circumstances should you bring a weapon to work. Employees should report to work without being under the influence of illegal drugs or alcohol. The use of illegal drugs in the workplace will not be tolerated."

In California, where the podcast was filmed, recreational marijuana use is legal. However, recreational use across the U.S. is illegal. CNBC pointed out people could argue Musk was "under the influence" while at work because he was representing the company in the interview.
http://www.foxnews.com/tech/2018/09/07/elon-musk-puffs-on-weed-in-podcast-interview-amid-feud-with-cave-diver-workers-concerns.html

So Elon might want to calm down after this latest string of incidents because not only is he costing Tesla money, he could forever jeopardize the future of Space X, and eventually any further space exploration:

News of Elon Musk’s infamous drag from a joint containing tobacco and marijuana has made it all the way to the Air Force.

The incident, which occurred during a live broadcast of a podcast recording with the comedian Joe Rogan, has already caused Tesla stocks to plummet in the latest in a spate of recent events that have raised questions about Musk’s health and his ability to lead his multiple companies. But Musk’s latest escapade could have effects beyond the bottom line.

SpaceX, another Musk project, has access to privileged information—such as where U.S. government satellites are—in its capacity as a federal contractor, and the Air Force is now faced with the question of what to do about Musk’s public smoking of marijuana, which is legal in California but not federally—and particularly not for people in the military or who have security clearance. Initial reports indicated the Air Force had opened an investigation into Musk, but an Air Force official later told The Verge that the military still wasn’t sure how to handle the situation.
http://fortune.com/2018/09/10/musk-weed-marijuana-air-force-spacex/

There you have it, it’s almost as if Mr. Musk wants to get sued for his insane antics. This has been it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
[br] [/font] [br]

From: Idiots #5-14

Gather around, my fair brothers and sisters, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate! For the Holy Church of the Top 10 has convened and it’s our weekly duty to remind you why the holiest among us are also the most full of:

My friends, my fair congregation! Remember in that movie “The Dark Knight” when Batman only had one rule and that he would never break it for anybody? Well tonight I am actually going to break my one rule. And that rule is that I never mention the unholy, ungodly Dark One by name in my church! But when there’s a movie being made about unforeseen prophecies surrounding the Dark One, as told by a crackpot, I feel that I must break character!

Early one morning in 2011, retired Florida firefighter Mark Taylor was wrestling with another bout of insomnia. After years working at Orlando’s busy Station 2, Taylor struggled with depression, suicidal thoughts and symptoms of PTSD.

Taylor says he also was being visited by demons, angels, even God. And on that sleepless morning, God gave him a surprising prophecy: “The Spirit of God says I’ve chosen this man Donald Trump for such a time as this.”

“The Trump Prophecy,” a movie showing here and in 1,200 theaters nationwide Tuesday and Thursday, claims God’s intervention decided the 2016 election, not Hillary hatred, white anger, Russian interference or low voter turnout.

Producer Rick Eldridge says his movie has a clear purpose: “Our end goal is to get people in theaters and see a film that will reignite patriotism and call people to pray for our country and leadership.”
https://gazette.com/life/the-trump-prophecy-movie-claims-god-chose-u-s-president/article_a0f9dc14-ba84-11e8-b6ad-77b01ad16d11.html

No, Rick, your end goal is to preach to the choir of supporters of the unholy dark one that their batshit crazy theories are justified! And that Dark One’s name? Donald J. Trump. There, I said it! And you know this movie is a direct violation of IRS tax exempt rules. And also apparently it violates Facebook advertising policies!

Fireman Mark Taylor correctly predicted the presidency of Donald Trump, but “The Trump Prophecy” filmmakers didn’t foresee having their advertisements pulled from Facebook.

The film, scheduled for a fall theatrical release, is about Taylor’s life and 2011 prediction that Trump would ascend to the White House. A joint effort of the Liberty University School of Cinematic Arts and filmmaker Rick Eldridge, The Trump Prophecy was shot in the Lynchburg area with much of the cast and crew comprised of LU students. It now is in post-production.

The Trump Prophecy, previously known by its working title “Commander,” is scheduled for release on Oct. 2 and 4. Nearly 60 LU cinematic arts students were involved in the production.

In all, he claimed Facebook disapproved “approximately 40 different ads” for the film.

The issue dates back to at least June 14 when it was first noted by the film’s Facebook page.

“It seems that Facebook has now began censoring our page. For a movie??? Because the word TRUMP, Facebook has decided to disapprove any ads that we are placing and capping our exposure. Do they feel threatened in some way?” reads the post on The Trump Prophecy page, which Eldridge and the Reelworks Studios advertising team manage.
https://www.newsadvance.com/news/local/lu-film-the-trump-prophecy-runs-afoul-of-facebook-ad/article_68550eb3-51bb-5293-bf38-bb723a12c48a.html

Because nothing is worse than a bunch of falsehood nonsense told by a crackpot is there? And you guys are mad when you violated Facebook’s rules are you? Well, you have nobody to blame but yourself, for the good LAWRD sayeth “man must not blame others for his own musings.” Yes it says so in my good book here. So was this election GAWD’s plan? Or was it not???

Now I do love that one! So is GAWD just getting started? Or do we need to remind you of the kind of crackpot that Mark Taylor is? And yes, he is a crackpot ladies and gentlemen of my fair congregation, because this is the kind of nonsense you can expect from Mr. Taylor!

Mark Taylor, the so-called “firefighter prophet” and radical conspiracy theorist who is the subject of a new movie premiering this week, appeared on Chris McDonald’s “The Mc Files” program on Friday, where he again asserted that opposition to Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh is all about trying to prevent President Trump from establishing military tribunals in order to prosecute and execute Democratic leaders like Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton.

“This has everything to do with military tribunals, them being charged with treason, and them going to prison for the rest of their lives and some being executed,” he said.

Taylor claimed that God recently delivered a huge “prophetic sign” of this plan when a horse named after Obama had to be euthanized at the World Equestrian Games in North Carolina last month.

“God’s been speaking a lot to me through racehorses,” he said. “The racehorse named Barack Obama was euthanized. That is probably the biggest prophetic sign that you could have of God saying this man is going to go down. Period. That’s the bottom line. You can get mad at me all you want to, but God’s the messenger here, he is the one sending the message. People don’t think that this stuff is real or it’s going to happen. It’s going to happen.”

“This is real,” Taylor insisted. “Justice is not coming, it’s here, period, and it is taking place on the earth. This whole thing with Kavanaugh is trying to stop the military tribunals … This is all about rounding these people up, charging them with treason, and they know that, basically, their head is going to be in a noose, literally.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/god-has-been-using-racehorses-to-speak-to-mark-taylor-about-plans-to-execute-democrats/

Really? This bullshit is still a thing? That’s why you are going to get your asses handed to you in November, and yes, I realized I just violated the IRS rules there! But then again, so did Liberty University, and they should pay dearly for this! But then again, Mark also claims that GAWD confirmed his SCOTUS prophecy with a train horn. Can you spell “crackpot”?

Mark Taylor, the so-called “firefighter prophet” and radical conspiracy theorist about whom Liberty University is making a movie, appeared on SkyWatch TV yesterday, where he explained how God used a train whistle to confirm that He was going to use President Trump to reshape the Supreme Court.

After Taylor recounted his claims that God told him that Trump will get to replace a total of five Supreme Court justices after one dies, one retires, and three are removed from the Court due to scandal, he explained how God confirmed this prophecy to him during the funeral service for the late Antonin Scalia.

“If you go back to Antonin Scalia’s funeral, when they were carrying his body up the steps” Taylor said, “there were two signs that were given by God that [the confirmation of Merrick Garland] was not going to happen. We had about an eight month window there where they could have put another justice in and the entire country was in a full-blown panic at that point and that’s when I came out with the prophecy that the Lord said, ‘No, it will not happen, this is being reserved for Donald Trump.'”

“The two signs that were given,” he continued, “there was a reverence there, it was very quiet and there was a siren in the background at the bottom of the steps. Well, when they got to the top of the steps, the siren fades away and all of a sudden you hear this enormous train horn and what the Lord was saying was, ‘Don’t fear America, help is on the way—the siren—this is being reserved for my anointed, Trump—from the Trump train.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/mark-taylor-god-confirmed-my-scotus-prophecy-with-a-train-horn/

Yes, Mark, even JAYSUS thinks you’re doing it wrong!! For your crackpot theories about the Dark One are just that – crackpot theories! There you go, mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Explaining Jokes To Idiots: Sexy Handmaid’s Tale
[br] [/font] [br]

From: Idiots #5-13

Let’s spin it to win it shall we? And It lands on… wait for it… Clip without context!

Damn that freedom! Damn your so called constitution with their laws and checks and balances. Damn it to hell, I say! Spin it again! And it’s time for Explaining Jokes To Idiots!

Yes it’s the segment where we in the comedy profession have to explain jokes to idiots that they missed, because they’re idiots. Case in point: Halloween is a time for humor and practical jokes. And of course for hot women to make any Halloween costume look hot. Yes it’s the time of year when we take a look at Halloween costumes, mainly women’s, and we ask ourselves “is it really necessary to have the sexy (insert costume here)?”. The answer always is yes, but this year one costume in particular seems to be drawing the ire of the PC police.

It turns out maybe oppression isn’t sexy after all.

Online retailer Yandy listed a "Brave Red Maiden" Halloween costume for nearly $65, referencing the garb women forced into surrogacy wear in Hulu's series "The Handmaid's Tale." The provocative rendition includes a red cape, mini dress and white bonnet.

"An upsetting dystopian future has emerged where women no longer have a say," the description reads. "However, we say be bold and speak your mind in this exclusive Brave Red Maiden costume."

The Halloween costume instantly sparked outraged across social media.

One Twitter user shared a screenshot of the costume and asked "why," sarcastically adding "nothing like a sexy rape victim for Halloween fun."
https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/tv/2018/09/20/sexy-handmaids-tale-halloween-costume-sparks-outrage/1375851002/

So here’s the thing – does this encapsulate the Handmaids’ Tale or does it miss the point of the series entirely? Everyone knows that the key to comedy is timing, and this was extremely well timed with everyone making references to the novel and series during the SCOTUS debates. But this is proof that you can make anything sexy! Like the New York Times anonymous op ed!

Lingerie company Yandy is selling a "Sexy Op-Ed Anonymous Costume," referencing the explosive New York Times column written by an unknown Trump administration staffer.

The $49.95 costume features disguise glasses with an attached nose and mustache, and a bodycon mini-dress with newspaper designs and a big red question mark.

The costume was discovered after Yandy removed a "Sexy Handmaid's Tale" look from the site.

The lingerie company that was criticized for selling a "Sexy Handmaid's Tale" costume is now offering a "Sexy Op-Ed Anonymous Costume," referring to the explosive New York Times column written by an unknown Trump administration staffer.

The costume, which Yandy is selling for $49.95, features disguise glasses with an attached nose and mustache, and a bodycon mini-dress with newspaper patterns and a big red question mark.
http://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/lifestyle-buzz/the-lingerie-company-that-had-to-remove-a-sexy-handmaids-tale-costume-is-now-selling-a-sexy-op-ed-anonymous-halloween-look/ar-AAAAozZ?li=BBnbcA0

OK maybe you can’t make that sexy. But come on it’s not like we’re living in Saudi Arabia, where the sexiest thing they can show is bare toenails, and I’m sure there’s a fetish website for that. Hey, I know what time I live in! Let sexy costumes be sexy costumes! I would like to think we’re all adults here but then again I’m reminded of who our president is. Thank you audience! And this is also not the first extremely poor taste Halloween costume that Yandy has put out.

The costume company recently called out for its “sexy” Handmaid’s Tale costume is under fire once again.

Lingerie brand Yandy, which also sells Halloween costumes, has 43 outfits categorized on its website under “sexy Native American” and “sexy Indian” costumes. People on Twitter urged the brand this week to stop selling the costumes, calling them “disgusting,” “racist,” and “highly offensive.”

These calls came less than a week after Yandy announced that it was pulling the “sexy” Handmaid’s Tale costume — complete with the infamous red cape and white bonnet — from its site following similar backlash online. The company said in a statement that its “corporate ideology is rooted in female empowerment, and gender empowerment overall.”

Twitter users were quick to point out that Yandy removed a costume depicting fictional characters while continuing to sell “cultural” costumes that have been repeatedly criticized. Yandy has not publicly responded to the #CancelYandy hashtag, and the lingerie brand did not immediately respond to Yahoo’s request for comment. As of Monday morning, the costumes were still for sale online.
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/cancelyandy-tweets-call-sexy-native-american-halloween-costumes-141909663.html

Sure you do Herbert. See, Yandy isn’t out to care about whatever cause you have, even though their executives have admitted that yes, some of their costumes are in extremely poor taste. They’re just like any corporation out to make the most profit they can doing what they do best. But that’s the whole point of Halloween! And the more horrible taste you have, the more likely you are to win that $500 costume contest! Which is why I’m inviting Yandy to sponsor my big Halloween costume bash in Nashville on October 31st at Zanies’. Tickets still available and dress up is encouraged! So come on, Yandy! My contact information is at the very end of this thing! You know that you want to! Thank you audience, I’ll take that! And besides if you really want to scare someone this year, I’ve got the perfect costume for you!

Breaking up can be messy. In the age of technology, some people choose to deal with it by "ghosting," the act of suddenly stopping communication and disappearing into a silent, unresponsive netherworld. That questionable behavior has now been immortalized in a Halloween costume.

The Womens Ghosted Costume is available through retailer Party City in the US. It's a white hooded polyester dress with a jagged hemline meant to evoke the look of a retro bed-sheet ghost outfit. The front is emblazoned with message bubbles of unanswered texts, including "???" and "R U OK!?"

"Eager texters will know not to bother you in this Ghosted Costume," the description reads.

There are at least a couple of weird things about this costume, even when you look past the debatable "sexy" Halloween trend. For starters, it's only geared toward women, which leaves us to wonder why men are being left out. Ghosting can go both ways.
https://www.cnet.com/news/this-ghosted-texting-halloween-costume-is-truly-haunting/

[font size="8"]This Fucking Guy: Lance Wallnau & Rick Wiles
[br] [/font] [br]

From: Idiots #5-9

It’s time for:

So ultra far right insane propaganda and conspiracy theories have been creeping up and popping up in literally every aspect of our lives now. That’s just the culture we live in. But there’s not one but two guys who are smoking the bad Covfefe 24 hours a day. I’ll start with this fucking guy – Lance Wallnau. And this fucking guy is certifiably batshit crazy, he cooks up more insane right wing theories than Alex Jones ever would or could! Like here’s a perfect example:

Right-wing preacher Lance Wallnau streamed a video on Periscope last night in which he asserted that millions of Americans are too afraid to admit that they support President Trump, which he likened directly to the Jews in the Bible who “all knew” that Jesus Christ was the Messiah and were too afraid to admit it.

“I’m just fed up with the fact that believers have to operate like the Jewish people did,” he said. “They all knew Jesus was the Messiah but nobody actually identified with him for fear of being put out of the synagogue. I mean, Donald Trump is that for me; you’ve got 50 million people that voted for him and you wouldn’t know where they are.”

Wallnau lamented that too many people are afraid of upsetting the “moronic elites who are progressively antagonistic to Donald Trump” to admit that they support the president, but predicted that millions of these voters will turn out in the midterms to support Republicans, resulting in “the first election where the 30 or so seats that are supposed to be lost don’t get lost.”

“In Hollywood and in the entertainment circles, conservatives and Christians cannot openly acknowledge their values and beliefs for fear of being put out of the synagogue,” Wallnau said. “How is this not like Israel at the time when Jesus was here? It’s exactly like that.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/lance-wallnau-people-afraid-to-support-trump-are-exactly-like-jews-afraid-to-admit-jesus-was-the-messiah/

There you have it – he literally just compared Trump supporters to Jews in the holocaust. And hey when racist shitbags start getting executed in the streets, then you can have a reason to complain. Until then, shut the fuck up! Thank you Detroit! Lance is so off the wall batshit crazy that he actually thought that Unite The Right II – the neo Nazi rally in DC last week – was a false flag!

Right-wing preacher Lance Wallnau posted a video on his Facebook page on Saturday, warning that the planned Unite The Right 2 rally in Washington, D.C., was really a left-wing front operation designed to demonize conservatives because “you can’t find white supremacists” in America today.

“These are paid actors,” Wallnau said. “The gift that the left wants is white supremacists and to link it with conservatives because there are no conservative white supremacists. That’s all a fiction.”

“If you really want to take down Donald Trump, to destroy what God’s doing in America, keep dividing people with hate, divide them with race, try to get Trump painted as a racist when he’s not,” Wallnau added, “they’re gonna come back at him with racism.”

Wallnau insisted that Jason Kessler, the organizer of the Unite The Right rallies, is really “a socialist/Marxist tool of the Obama administration to organize opposition” to Trump.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/lance-wallnau-unite-the-right-was-a-left-wing-false-flag/

Really? The Nazis were paid actors? So who’s paying them? Oh wait, don’t tell me! It was that dirty George Soros! I hear he has deep pockets. And his insurance benefits are pretty good too. As if fucking with people like Lance Wallnau wasn’t enough, there’s this fucking guy, Rick Wiles. Maybe Lance and Rick can cohost a show together – Batshit Crazy and Batshit Crazier! Oh wait, he doesn’t like conspiracy theorists. Except when he is one.

Rick Wiles is an End Times broadcaster and a truly unhinged right-wing conspiracy theorist who believes, among other things, that the Las Vegas massacre was carried out a top secret death squad that answers to the secret “a gay/lesbian Nazi regime” that controls America.

One would think that someone holding such views would be a fan of another equally unhinged right-wing conspiracy theorist Alex Jones, but apparently that is not the case, as Wiles used his “TruNews” television program on Tuesday to insist that “every Christian should disavow Alex Jones” because he is “mentally unstable” and/or demon-possessed.

Wiles was alarmed by a video of Jones going off on a snarling rant against CNN’s Brian Stelter earlier this year and warned that Jones is either demon-possessed or else a deep state “plant” designed to give the government justification to strip conservatives of their First and Second Amendment rights by making them all look insane.

“You need to be shocked by what this guy is saying and doing,” Wiles said. “Every Christian should disavow Alex Jones. You should disavow him until he repents and, quite frankly, until he is delivered.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/rick-wiles-every-christian-should-disavow-alex-jones/

Yeah probably. So Rick Wiles is a conspiracy theorist who doesn’t like conspiracy theorists. Is that the 2018 version of Dadaism? Just crazy against crazy? But apparently it’s all a big lie according to Rick. It’s all the deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep state folks!

To say that End Times broadcaster Rick Wiles is a right-wing conspiracy theorist would be a massive understatement, considering that he believes, among other things, that:

Rachel Maddow recently delivered a secret signal to leftist activists to storm the White House and decapitate President Trump and his family;
Liberal activists will begin killing Republicans before the midterm elections in preparation for civil war;
The government is creating soulless super soldiers and flesh-eating robots;
The Las Vegas massacre was carried out by a gay/lesbian Nazi regime;
A secret government goon squad is beating up politicians, murdered the late Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, and is carrying out mass shootings in order to justify implementing gun control.

Wiles also repeatedly asserted that Barack Obama was literally a demon (and likely the Antichrist) who intended to seize the homes of conservatives and give them to immigrants, intentionally unleash the Ebola virus on the nation in order to round up conservatives, and would permanently seize power in 2016.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/its-a-big-lie-rick-wiles-says-qanon-is-a-deep-state-misinformation-campaign/

There you have it, that’s Lance Wallnau and Rick Wiles. This week’s:

[font size="8"]I Need A Drink
[br] [/font] [br]

From: Idiots #5-16

Hey Boston, I’m in one of the biggest drinking cities in America, I really need a drink!

So of course you know the idea behind this segment is that we have a few drinks and talk about anything in the news as long as it doesn’t relate to politics. But this week we’re actually going to break our rule and talk about something in politics. While I generally don’t mix booze and politics I do mix booze and fails. So tell me bartender, what goes well with a story about Kanye? Really? There’s a beer called “Stable Genius”? Why didn’t I think of that? Ah I’ll just have my usual Jack Daniels mixed with Jack Daniels. So I’m sure by now you heard that Kanye West was meeting with Trump last week and somebody may have discovered that his passcode is 000000. Even Saturday Night Live made fun of it:

Excuse me a minute… Yeah that happened. So there’s of course more to this story than you might think:

Kanye West may need a new iPhone password. The outspoken musician accidentally revealed his password when unlocking his iPhone X on video during a meeting with President Trump, shown to be the incredibly weak combination of 000000.

West revealed the password as part of a stream of consciousness speech to the president, which saw him break off on a tangent to show off a GIF of what West referred to as “the iPlane 1,” a hydrogen-powered concept aircraft that he felt “our President should be flying in.” (Trump: “Can we get rid of Air Force One? No?”)

Despite using an iPhone X or XS — which both support Face ID, therefore negating the need for a typed-in password — West chose to unlock his phone manually. (Whether Face ID failed, was disabled, or is simply not fast enough for West is unclear.) Apple doesn’t recommend that users set such a simple password on its iOS devices. If you attempt to change your password to something like 000000 or 123456, a notification will pop up, suggesting that the combination can be easily guessed and recommending that you choose something else.

Despite using an iPhone X or XS — which both support Face ID, therefore negating the need for a typed-in password — West chose to unlock his phone manually. (Whether Face ID failed, was disabled, or is simply not fast enough for West is unclear.) Apple doesn’t recommend that users set such a simple password on its iOS devices. If you attempt to change your password to something like 000000 or 123456, a notification will pop up, suggesting that the combination can be easily guessed and recommending that you choose something else.
https://www.theverge.com/tldr/2018/10/11/17964848/kanye-west-iphone-passcode-trump-iplane-apple-meeting

Come on, Kanye! You’ve got an iPhone X! You can unlock the phone with your face, and the fact that Kanye doesn’t do that already to me is beyond baffling. You know that Kim somewhere has her phone setup to unlock by selfie. Of course it’s a bad idea to use 000000. You might as well have a sign on your back that says “hack me”!

It’s still not exactly clear why Kanye West is so enamored with the science denying, race-baiting commander-in-chief. But fortunately, it’s only a matter of time before the truth gets out thanks to some noble iPhone hacker: My dude’s lock-screen password is literally 000000.

We know this because the Chicago rapper visited the Oval Office on Thursday to discuss topics ranging from prison reform to job opportunities for ex-cons. At one point in the meeting, Kanye wanted to show the president something on his phone, and proceeded to unlock it on live television. In short order, the whole world had an opportunity to grasp just how much Ye’s commitment to cybersecurity leaves to be desired.

All of this could have been easily avoided if he had used FaceID to unlock his phone. But, it seems that he either didn’t activate the facial recognition feature introduced with the iPhone X — or it simply didn’t work.

The musician’s ensuing rant left the President speechless as well as many onlookers, making Kanye’s dumb-ass password the photo-op’s main takeaway. One viral tweet amassed more than 39,000 likes, 12,000 retweets, and almost 800 replies at the time of this writing.
https://www.inverse.com/article/49813-kanye-west-password-is-terrible

Come on Kanye, you’re one of the most famous people in the world. Like I said you might as well invite people to hack you. I’m sure Trump somewhere is going “Come on, my iPhone passcode is 123456, no one can hack me!”. Of course you can. In fact it’s probably illegal.

The day has come: Kanye West met with Donald Trump for the second time since the 2016 election. There were hugs. MAGA hats. West praised Trump's relations with North Korea, and gave a monologue that touched on everything from the 13th and 2nd amendments to Superman. The whole event was confusing, uncomfortable, and deeply depressing. But there was one small spark of joy.

West, a man who has referred to himself on a number of occasions as "Steve Jobs," a man who expresses unreserved admiration for Jobs and Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak, uses 000000 as the passcode for his iPhone. He is one of the biggest celebrities in the world. The contents of his phone are probably more valuable than Elon Musk's current net worth. How could he have such bad security?!

He'll probably change it now, but it was still hilarious. Do you think the passcode is performance art? Has Kanye heard of two-factor authentication? Will that cousin who stole his laptop come back for the iPhone?

Jobs is turning in his grave.
http://www.papermag.com/kanye-west-passcode-2611721610.html

Does anyone get the irony of this? The guy who travels with a 50 person entourage for security purposes obviously doesn’t give a shit about cyber security! So go on, if someone is dumb enough to give their passcode is 000000, don’t be surprised when you get hacked! And I guess Kim isn’t too concerned either!

It's been an interesting couple of weeks for Kanye West, whose Trump-supporting antics peaked this past week when he met with Donald Trump in the White House. The meeting was a bizarre spectacle to say the least, with Kanye pitching Air Force 1 ideas, dropping quotes like 'Time is a myth,' and accidentally revealing his uninspired iPhone passcode.

Despite the backlash, CNN says that Kim Kardashian West is "not embarrassed" by Kanye's behavior, contrary to previous reports. "Kim is incredibly supportive," a source said, adding that West's mind "moves at lightning speed" and suggested the forum for the White House meeting wasn't the best representation of West's "genius."

Leading up to Kanye's White House appearance, Kardashian told Extra that she excited for it. "I always say he isn't the best communicator, but he has the best heart," Kardashian said. "I know what he wants to accomplish... and I can't wait to see that happen."

Shortly after Kanye's surprise post-show rant on SNL, the rapper deactivated his social media accounts. But he made his return to Twitter yesterday for a lengthy discussion on mind control.
https://www.elle.com/culture/a23763905/kim-kardashian-not-embarrassed-kanye-west-report/

[font size="8"]Deep State Diaries Episode 10: The DMV
[br] [/font] [br]

From: Idiots #5-10

It’s time for episode 10 of Deep State Diaries. Yes we’re touring the 24 branches and services that make up the United States government. Everything from the FBI to the IRS to the Pentagon to the CIA to the DPW to the DVA to parks and recreation and all branches and services in between. Of course if you’re here you probably already know more about our government and how it works than your average Fox News loving Trump supporter does. So that’s what this segment is going to address. We are going to do a deep dive into all that makes the United States the United States. Because we here at the Top 10 love to educate as well as entertain. Because we care.

[font size="6"]The Department Of Motor Vehicles[/font]

Our next foray into the Deep State centers around the one branch of the government everyone loves to hate because it’s such a bureaucracy. That’s the Department of Motor Vehicles. The DMV’s overall attention to bureaucratic tendencies has become a running joke on TV shows including the Simpsons and Futurama – which took the DMV’s concept to new heights with the Central Bureaucracy. So why does this organization get such a bad rap? Why do people hate it so much? Well there’s plenty of reasons for that, and none of them are really good. Especially if you’re trying to get a new license, and there happens to be some janky computer software installed.

Idaho’s county sheriffs agree: The Idaho Transportation Department’s new driver’s license software is a wreck.

On Monday, ITD announced yet another breakdown of the system had shut down driver’s license services across the state. The problem, the agency said, was on the software vendor’s side and also affected other states that vendor serves.

At 7:25 a.m. Tuesday, the state agency said on Twitter that the system was back up. But by noon, ITD reversed course and told all sheriff-run DMV offices to “close their doors while troubleshooting continues,” according to a news release.

The Ada County Sheriff’s Office had already sent its DMV staff home by 11 a.m. due to continued problems.
https://www.idahostatesman.com/news/northwest/idaho/article217422665.html

So that’s just one state! Maybe it’s a department glitch? Maybe it’s a network glitch? Maybe it’s something with the system? Well no, try all of the above! The DMV is one of the jankier operations in our government and it definitely needs some improvement.

Some state employees have been able to skip the long lines at N.C. Division of Motor Vehicles offices this summer by going to a driver’s license office that’s open only to them.

The office, on the third floor of DMV headquarters on New Bern Avenue in Raleigh, has been used for years to test new equipment and procedures and to train workers. But starting in January, DMV invited employees at several state agencies to visit the office to get a REAL ID, a new type of driver’s license that satisfies federal identification standards that will take effect in 2020.

The existence of the state license office was first reported by WBTV in Charlotte, which referred to it as a “secret driver’s license office” used by “select state employees.” DMV Commissioner Torre Jessup bristled at that characterization, saying emails inviting people to use the office were sent to all employees of nine state departments, including Transportation, Public Safety, Agriculture and Consumer Services and Natural and Cultural Resources.

“It’s not secret. We sent out an email with the invitation,” Jessup said in an interview Tuesday. “This is just one part of the entire outreach for us to get people in to get their REAL IDs.”
https://www.newsobserver.com/news/local/article217456955.html

Now here’s the real reason that people hate the DMV – the lines. Which is absolutely fucking ironic when you think about it since we live in an era where people will wait *DAYS* in line for expensive shit like phones and shoes, but they can’t be bothered to wait 2 hours in line to get their fucking drivers’ license renewed! Thank you Minneapolis!

Wait times at Southern California Department of Motor Vehicles offices have some drivers traveling hundreds of miles to avoid long lines.

The DMV in the high desert town of Needles has some of the shortest lines in the state, KABC reported. When a news crew arrived at 10:30 a.m. Monday, there were only two people waiting in line.

"It's really nice. Not like back at home in L.A. County," one customer said to KABC.

Although the DMV's long lines are infamous, the situation worsened when the DMV started processing information for California’s REAL ID. The modified license will be required for travel in some states and access to secure federal facilities after October 1, 2020.

A spokesperson for the DMV said the agency is monitoring wait times at all 172 field offices across the state.
https://www.10news.com/news/californians-willing-to-travel-for-shorter-dmv-waits

Well at least they gave Otto a shot. But really this just dumbfounds me. People will travel so they don’t have to wait in line, but will gladly give up days to get a new iPhone! The hypocrisy is completely mind boggling! In fact there’s literally people who will wait in line for you! Just…. Ahhh!!!!!

Every Californian is forced to interact with the DMV occasionally, but we all try to limit in-person visits whenever possible because wait times have become so intolerable. The DMV has always been notorious for poor customer service; however, this year wait times have reached record levels and so have the complaints.

Part of the problem is due to a new type of driver’s license that started being offered in January. Back in 2005, Congress passed the REAL ID Act, which established federal security standards for government-issued identification. People who want to board airline flights, visit military bases or enter federal buildings using a driver’s license after Oct. 1, 2020 must have REAL ID-compliant identification. Due to these increased security standards, REAL ID must be obtained in person at the local DMV office. The influx of people applying for a REAL ID-compliant license is making already-long wait times even worse.

At the Department’s request, last year the Legislature appropriated it an extra $70 million to minimize wait times for its customers in anticipation of the additional workload caused by REAL ID. This money was specifically allocated to open 60 DMV field offices on Saturdays starting in January. However, I was shocked to recently discover that it wasn’t until Aug. 4th that all 60 field offices were finally open on Saturdays.
http://www.vvdailypress.com/news/20180826/committee-rejects-auditing-dmvs-excessive-wait-times

But there’s currently no plans to implement a fast lane at the DMV yet. So don’t go thinking that your time waiting in line is going to be cut short. That’s wishful thinking. There won’t be a VIP or early entry line at least any time soon.

Lines at the DMV are moving more quickly — at least according to the department’s director.

Director Jean Shiomoto says recent changes have shaved time off the average wait.

KCAL9’s Laurie Perez spoke with the director in Granada Hills Saturday while she toured the local DMV office.

Liz and Levi Deras knew spending Saturday morning at the DMV wasn’t going to be fun.

“I came here like around 8:30 and it’s 9:54, so an hour and a half,” said Liz.

Many drivers said they’ve noticed longer wait times.

“I’m beyond frustrated right now,” says Alicia Moran.
https://losangeles.cbslocal.com/2018/08/25/lines-at-the-dmv-not-exactly-the-fast-lane-just-yet/

[font size="6"]Score Card [/font]

Overall importance: A
How Things Are Going: D-
Likely hood To Survive: B+

Overall: C-

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

Get out your paint brushes, polish your musical instruments, and get your scripts ready as we are going to check out the National Endowment For The Arts!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]AWOLNATIONl[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is an awesome band from Los Angeles. They have a great new album out called “Here Come The Runts” and you can see them at the Red Sun Festival in Redding, CA September29th and the Voodoo Music & Arts Festival in New Orleans on October 26th – 29th. Playing their song called “Passion”, give it up for AWOLNATION!

Happy Thanksgiving! The Top 10 will return next week with a brand new edition live from Tempe! See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Alamo Drafthouse, Kansas City, KS
Special Thanks To: Alamo Drafthouse Management
Top 10 Gospel Choir: Our Church Of The Nazarene Choir, Shawnee, KS
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
AWOLNTION appear courtesy of: Red Bull Records
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: [email protected]

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

November 14, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-20: Diary Of A Wimpy Trump: Old School Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-20: Diary Of A Wimpy Trump: Old School Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Sign up today for the new Top 10 Rewards Signature Visa Card! We have rates as low as 5.9% APR with bonus frequent flyer miles for 24 months! What’s up Denver? Ah, it’s good to be back. I do love this city – lots of great beer and food. And Denver is a beer town too. Man you guys are drunk too! And hey we’re in the mile high city so drinking one beer feels like you’re drinking 5 beers. Not to mention you guys have some great drunk food. I can guarantee that if I lived here I’d probably weigh over 500 pounds. Just saying. So do we have time for the thing? So something very sad happened as we were putting together this week’s Top 10 – the man, the myth, the legend that is the great Stan Lee has passed away. Fuck!!! Man, that just sucks because we wouldn’t have the awesome Marvel Cinematic Universe without him, nor would we have one of my favorites – Deadpool. But really you got to give it up for Stan – at 95 he was still appearing in Ant Man & The Wasp – which is a great addition to the MCU if you haven’t seen it yet. But really you could go through any number of the great movies and characters that he’s created – like Iron Man, Spiderman, the Incredible Hulk, Captain America, the X-Men – really all of the Avengers. And it really sucks what happened to him at the end of his life, all of the embezzlement and fraud in his name. However we’re not really going to talk about that, I’d rather celebrate the man’s life. And we’ll do so by showing a clip from one of my favorite flicks of the last couple of years, Thor: Ragnarok:

And you know what? Throughout this whole edition today we’ll use this time to pay tribute to Stan Lee, the Top 10 way! OK enough of the intro, we have a lot of idiocy to get to. But first John Oliver is back and he shows that Trump hasn’t exactly lived up to his promise of “draining the swamp”:

Taking the first slot this week of course is our now former Attorney General Jeff Sessions (1) and another Trump firing means it’s time for another installment of the Trumper Games! Wooo! And if you think that’s bad, wait until you meet his replacement - Matt Whittaker (2)! Think Sessions was bad? You ain’t seen nothing yet! At the third slot this week, is of course our current president Donald J. Trump (3) and we have to talk about his visit to France, and once again, like a kid getting sent to the principal’s office, he of course has to meet with his boss, Vladimir Putin. In the slot #4 is the NRA (4). Sigh, another week, another mass shooting. This one hits way too close to home though at Thousand Oaks, California. But did you know that the NRA is escalating its’ war on the Center For Disease Control? Yeah that is happening and the NRA vs Doctors is absolutely insane. Taking the 5th slot is our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates, and this week, we’re going to look at a controversial proposal that passed in California last week – what exactly is Prop 8 and how will it affect you? Well, we will find out. For the sixth slot this week is of course our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit”, and this week, our resident pastor usually doesn’t kick people when they’re down, but we have to gloat at the fact that embattled Kentucky clerk Kim Davis lost! Ha ha! For the seventh slot this week, Beating A Dead Horse (7) is back for the 3rd week in a row! This week we’re going to talk about something that is absolutely infuriating Christian conservatives – drag queen story hour. Is it really a bad thing? We shall find out!For the 8th slot this week, we’ve got a brand new installment of “People Who Somehow Got Elected” and this week it’s Florida’s new governor Ron DeSantis (8) – how did this guy get elected? Well… Florida is a bit racist if you can’t tell. At number 9 (NEIN!!!) this week is an all new People Are Dumb, because of course People Are Dumb! Finally this week we’ve got a brand new edition of our ongoing series that explains how government works to conspiracy theorists, Deep State Diaries, and this week we’re going to explore planes – and specifically the group that monitors them, the FAA! Plus we’ve got a great musical guest for you – Colorado’s own Nataniel Raetliff & The Night Sweats are going to be stopping by! Really buy their new album “Tearing At The Seams” or you’re no friend of the show. Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Jeff Sessions
[br] [/font] [br]

Happy Trumper Games! Hey everyone! I’m baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ooh, it has been way too long, my pretties! Of course every day in this administration seems like it’s an eternity doesn’t it? Oh, strap in because if you thought the first two years were completely insane, wait until you see the next two! For the president has declared himself to be judge, jury and executioner. The last time we were here, Tribute Hayley from the 5th district has resigned. This week, the President simply removed Tribute Sessions from the 2nd district. You know, don’t ask me how the districts work because even I don’t know. Well, anyway here is the latest!

Attorney General Jeff Sessions was pushed out Wednesday as the country’s chief law enforcement officer after enduring more than a year of blistering and personal attacks from President Donald Trump over his recusal from the Russia investigation.

Sessions told the president in a one-page letter that he was submitting his resignation “at your request.”

Trump announced in a tweet that he was naming Sessions’ chief of staff Matthew Whitaker, a former United States attorney from Iowa, as acting attorney general. Whitaker has criticized special counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation into potential coordination between the president’s Republican campaign and Russia.

The resignation was the culmination of a toxic relationship that frayed just weeks into the attorney general’s tumultuous tenure, when he stepped aside from the Mueller investigation.
http://time.com/5448197/jeff-sessions-resigns/

Oh that’s fierce, honey! Work it! And damn it, Charlie! Why must you bring me the cheap champagne? I want the good stuff! What? Management says that we can’t afford the good stuff? Very well then! But this is a huge upset for the Trumper Games. Tribute Sessions was very heavily favored above the rest, but that doesn’t stop the president from pulling a dick move and forcing Tribute Sessions to resign, because in the Trumper Games, anything can happen at any minute!

President Trump could wait no longer.

On Wednesday — a day after the midterm elections, with several races still too close to call — the president forced the resignation of his attorney general, Jeff Sessions. The New York Times quickly published a 1,300-word story, the first version of which had been written in July … of 2017.

That was after President Trump lashed out at Mr. Sessions in an interview. And for the past 16 months, Peter Baker, the chief White House correspondent, has been updating the story, and waiting.

“Every time something happened in the news that made us wonder if Sessions was about to resign or be fired, we would update it and make sure it was ready to go,” Mr. Baker said.

It was a type of article known in the newsroom as an H.F.O. — “Hold for Orders” — written and edited in anticipation of news that hasn’t happened yet. H.F.O.s are planned for scheduled events, like elections and inaugurations, but also the less predictable, the seemingly possible, and the inevitable. Their execution is essential procedure in daily journalism.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/08/reader-center/hfo-breaking-news-hold-for-orders.html

Don’t forget the crazy straw, Charlie! Yes, the president may be an abusive jackass and the textbook definition of a “horrible boss” but that doesn’t stop him from simply thinking that he is above the law and can do whatever he pleases!

The fallout after the midterm elections has begun. After a tumultuous relationship with President Donald Trump, Attorney General Jeff Session has resigned at the president’s request.

“We are pleased to announce that Matthew Whitaker, Chief of Staff to Attorney General Jeff Sessions at the Department of Justice, will become our new Acting Attorney General of the United States. He will serve our Country well,” the president tweeted.

“We thank Attorney General Jeff Sessions for his service, and wish him well! A permanent replacement will be nominated at a later date.”
https://www.kplctv.com/2018/11/07/jeff-sessions-resigns-attorney-general/

Yes that is true! And in case you were wondering if the firing of Tribute Sessions had any effects on any kind of market, well this one, I can assure you, is for real! Yes, Tribute Sessions had a real problem with legalized pot, and was planning to escalate the war against it. But consider this a bonus as Tribute Sessions is… eliminated!

Jeff Sessions resigned as Attorney General Wednesday, which is a nice way of saying President Trump fired him. On the day after the 2018 midterms, in which the Democrats took control of the House, and on the tail end of a White House press conference that devolved into an alarming display of executive power, Sessions got the boot, giving us one more thing to react to. And probably because Sessions was a tyrant when it came to marijuana, spewing racist assumptions about how "good people" don't smoke it and supporting punitive policies that targeted people of color, cannabis stocks reacted very positively to the news.

CNBC reports that cannabis companies Canopy Growth, Aurora Cannabis, and Cronos Group all jumped up between 8 and 9 percent to close the day high. Canadian company Tilray shot up 30 percent. Data reporter Christopher Ingraham showed how the marijuana market as a whole surged (Trump announced Sessions' resignation at 2:44 p.m.):

Cannabis stocks weren't hurt by the midterm elections either, when Michigan voted to legalize recreational weed, and Utah and Missouri passed medical marijuana measures. Michigan itself adds millions of more potential weed buyers to the states, and for the first time makes a weed haven in the Midwest.
https://www.esquire.com/lifestyle/money/a24846802/marijuana-stocks-jump-jeff-sessions-michigan/

[font size="8"]Matt Whittaker
[br] [/font] [br]

So Jeff Sessions is out as Attorney General. And if you thought he was bad, just wait until you meet his replacement, Matt Whittaker! Whew, yeah that is all I have to say, whew. This man is absolutely fucking scary. And here’s the really fucked up thing about this appointment – Trump claims he doesn’t remember the guy! Or does he? Well I don’t think even he’s sure who he knows or who he doesn’t know – and I’m not surprised in the least either.

President Trump went out of his way on Friday to distance himself from Matthew G. Whitaker, his choice to replace Jeff Sessions as attorney general, saying repeatedly that he did not know Mr. Whitaker and had not spoken to him and emphasizing that the new attorney general was merely “there in an acting position.”

“I don’t know Matt Whitaker,” Mr. Trump told reporters as he left Washington for a weekend trip to Paris. But the president stressed that he did know Mr. Whitaker’s reputation well, calling him “a very respected man.”

The faint presidential praise came just two days after Mr. Trump unceremoniously dumped Mr. Sessions, putting Mr. Whitaker in charge of the Justice Department and the special counsel’s investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election. Since then, criticism has mounted about Mr. Whitaker’s lack of credentials to be the nation’s top law enforcement official, along with allegations that he has conflicts of interest that should keep him from overseeing the Russia inquiry.

“I am not aware of any precedent for appointment of an official who has not been confirmed by the Senate to serve as acting attorney general,” Mr. Schumer wrote.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/09/us/politics/matthew-whitaker-donald-trump.html

Yeah that’s probably about the exact reaction we’d expect from Trump at this point. So what makes Whitaker so qualified to be the new acting Attorney General? Well, he kisses Trump’s ass, and that’s about all you need to know. Oh, and he has also had some incredibly shady business dealings in the past.

Donald Trump’s new acting attorney general Matthew Whitaker ran for statewide office twice in Iowa, and lost badly both times. After the second defeat — he finished fourth in a 2014 GOP Senate primary — a group of conservative lawyers in Washington, D.C., approached with him with an idea. According to a GOP operative familiar with the discussion, the group recruited Whitaker into an effort to start a conservative counterpoint to Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington. For years, CREW had bedeviled the right with its crusades for good governance and its annual list of the most corrupt members of Congress. The Republican legal world saw the outfit as little more than a partisan operation masquerading as a government-accountability project, and they wanted their own version.

Whitaker, a former United States Attorney for the Southern District of Iowa, took the job, dividing his time between Des Moines, where he was a partner in one of the leading Republican law firms in the state, and this new group, named Foundation for Accountability and Civic Trust, in Washington. Its fundraising was mysterious — almost all of its money came from Donors Trust, an organization set up to shield conservative donors’ identities when they gave to a network of right-wing political organizations. Whitaker, according to tax documents, was paid more than $400,000 for his work for the group in 2016.
http://nymag.com/intelligencer/2018/11/matthew-whitaker-ran-a-chop-shop-of-fake-ethics-complaints.html

Yeah probably. For those of you keeping score at home – Whitaker ran a shady corporation that got busted by the SEC for fraud. Check. Mysterious and untraceable fundraising. Check. Oh and he’s also a loyalist. Check mate! And in case you’re wondering – Whitaker is the perfect guy to obstruct the Mueller investigation, which is what he was hired to do.

Democratic leaders pressed the Department of Justice's top ethics official on Sunday to provide answers on whether the department has advised acting Attorney General Matthew Whitaker to recuse himself from overseeing special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation.

In a letter to Lee Lofthus, the assistant attorney general for administration, Democrats highlighted Whitaker's past comments criticizing the Mueller probe and what they called a "troubling" conflict of interest as evidence that he should have no role overseeing the investigation.

"There are serious ethical considerations that require Mr. Whitaker’s immediate recusal from any involvement with the Special Counsel investigation of the Russian government’s efforts to interfere in the 2016 presidential election," the Democrats wrote.

Before Whitaker joined the Justice Department as former Attorney General Jeff Sessions' chief of staff in late 2017, he was a conservative legal commentator and wrote an opinion piece for CNN titled "Mueller's investigation into Trump is going too far."
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/justice-department/top-democrats-say-matt-whitaker-must-offer-immediate-recusal-mueller-n934921

Exactly, sir. But really, ethics? Who needs them? I mean really – have you been living in the last two years? I ask – because I really want to know! This is the Donald J. Trump administration we’re talking about here. Laws. Facts. Ethics. Reason. Conscious. Thinking. I mean who needs to do all that hard thinking if you can have Fox News do it for you? But the firing of Jeff Sessions puts this administration in some very uncharted territory .

Warning of an impending constitutional crisis if action is not taken to protect Robert Mueller, congressional Democrats demanded on Sunday that acting attorney general Matthew Whitaker recuse himself from overseeing the special counsel’s investigation and warned of a showdown in Congress if Whitaker does not.

Top Democrats have written to the chief ethics officer of the justice department, asking for an official opinion on whether Whitaker, who has denied Russian interference in the 2016 election and described a strategy for derailing Mueller, should recuse himself from the Russia inquiry.

Whitaker will be the first witness summoned by the House judiciary committee when Democrats take charge in January, the incoming chairman, Jerry Nadler, said, calling Whitaker “a complete political lackey” and “a real threat to the integrity of that investigation”.

Donald Trump fired the attorney general, Jeff Sessions, on Wednesday and appointed Whitaker, a former US attorney from Iowa and Sessions’s chief of staff, to be acting attorney general – a move Democrats called illegal.
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/nov/11/trump-matthew-whitaker-robert-mueller-democrats-constitutional-crisis

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font] [br]

Why did the guy who we currently call president – Donald J. Trump, or as John Oliver called him “Donald T. Rump” go to France this week? Was it to honor our World War I veterans on the 100th anniversary of the end of WWI? No. was it to strengthen diplomatic ties between the US and France? No. Why he got sent to the principal’s office again. Think of this as the 4th installment of Diary Of A Wimpy Trump. Let’s call this one “Diary Of A Wimpy Trump: Old School”. So the Trip to France was essentially one disaster after another.

Still fighting political flaps that arose during his weekend in France, President Donald Trump said Tuesday that the Secret Service nixed a visit to a cemetery in the rain because the motorcade would have shut down Paris.

"When the helicopter couldn’t fly to the first cemetery in France because of almost zero visibility, I suggested driving," Trump tweeted. "Secret Service said NO, too far from airport & big Paris shutdown."

Trump took heat back home after the White House announced it had canceled a trip to Aisne-Marne American Cemetery and Memorial near Paris "due to scheduling and logistical difficulties caused by the weather," including rain and fog.

By the way, when the helicopter couldn’t fly to the first cemetery in France because of almost zero visibility, I suggested driving. Secret Service said NO, too far from airport & big Paris shutdown. Speech next day at American Cemetary in pouring rain! Little reported-Fake News!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) November 13, 2018

The statement said nothing about a possible motorcade. Trump, who traveled to Paris for a series of events commemorating the 100th anniversary of the end of World War I, spent Saturday afternoon out of the public eye.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2018/11/13/donald-trump-secret-service-cemetery-trip-france/1986252002/

Of course it was fake news. Everything is fake news isn’t it? Of course Trump likes to rub salt in the wound, because, why not? That’s what a good psychopath does, don’t you know .

Donald Trump ramped up his spat with Emmanuel Macron, the French president, with a denigrating tweet in which he said Parisians had started to learn German during the second world war before the US saved them from occupation.

The US president’s Tuesday morning tweet exacerbates his standoff with Macron following his visit to Paris over the weekend that was marred by his controversial behavior. In the tweet Trump repeated his accusation that Macron had called for a European army as protection against the US – an apparent misreading of Macron’s earlier comments.

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1062311785787744256

The biting words represent an escalation of the attack Trump made on Friday in which he said Macron had been “very insulting” by suggesting Europe needed its own army to protect itself against the US, China and Russia. Trump appeared to be conflating, however, Macron’s desire to strengthen Europe’s military forces – an ambition Trump himself has demanded as he seeks to reduce US contributions to Nato – and comments made by the French president in a radio interview about the threat of cyber-hacking from other countries including the US.
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/nov/13/trump-macron-eu-army-german-second-world-war

He can sever 200 years of diplomatic relations in a single tweet! He’s super troll! Oh by the way in case you’re wondering – this is the point in the movie where the kid gets sent to the principal’s office, and well, that went well.

The weekend away in Paris should not have been hard. For most politicians, events like the armistice commemoration represent an opportunity to project themselves as greater than the sum of their soundbites, above the political fray, sombre yet at their ease among world leaders as they look out across the century gone by. There are lofty prepared remarks and no questions.

For Donald Trump, that was a bridge too far. The trip to France got off to a bad start and kept getting worse. He landed with a tweet, directed against his host, Emmanuel Macron, and based on a mangling in the US press of something the French president had said, to make it sound like he wanted a European army to fend off the US, as well as China and Russia.

It was not what Macron said, but Trump fulminated anyway. “Very insulting,” he declared.

In a way, the US president had come to France by mistake. He had announced the trip in August after he declared that Washington’s municipal leaders wanted to over-charge for the military parade he had demanded.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/nov/11/thumbs-up-from-putin-as-trump-rains-on-armistice-parade

I guess in this case you could say that Trump *LITERALLY* rained on France’s Armistice Day parade – which is meant to be a solemn vigil, and leave it to Trump to turn it into a shit show. But even one of Trump’s favorite punching bags, Chuck Schumer took issue with the visit turning into a shit show:

Actually, sir, you know what he's really afraid of? Having to do any actual work. The man can barely close an umbrella, what makes you think he's going to do anything presidential? Because let’s face it, he doesn’t care about anything else at this point, other than ratings and crowd sizes. Fuck it. Fuck it all, I say!

President Donald Trump discussed several key issues with Russian President Vladimir Putin, French President Emmanuel Macron and German Chancellor Angela Merkel during a lunch at Élysée Palace, according to White House press secretary Sarah Sanders.

"Today at lunch, the President sat with President Macron, Chancellor Merkel, and President Putin, and many other world leaders," Sanders told reporters traveling with the President. "The leaders discussed a variety of issues, including the INF (nuclear treaty), Syria, trade, the situation in Saudi Arabia, sanctions, Afghanistan, China and North Korea."

Sanders said, "They had very good and productive discussions during the two-hour lunch," which was held at the official residence of the French President.
Russian state news agencies reported a brief exchange between Trump and Putin at Sunday's armistice centenary ceremonies in Paris.

RIA Novosti reported Putin as replying in the affirmative when asked if he was able to talk with Trump in a meeting at the Élysée Palace with other foreign leaders.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/11/politics/white-house-trump-putin-macron-merkel/index.html

?itemid=11773663

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]The NRA
[br] [/font] [br]

So we had another mass shooting last week. And this one hit way too close to home as it happened at a bar in Thousand Oaks, California, that was hosting a “College Country Night”, and it’s seriously horrible what happened. Now if you’re the NRA, how do you spin this story? Well, a group of doctors conducting into research for gun control got their arguments shut down by the NRA, because in their eyes, guns are more important than people.

A social media war has erupted between doctors and the National Rifle Association, just as 12 people were shot and killed at a California nightclub and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention released new figures showing gun deaths on the rise across the country.

Doctors started a hashtag group #ThisisOurLane to argue for action to reduce gun violence. It quickly filled up with comments from medical professionals and supporters pointing out the effects gun violence has on them and their patients. Emergency professionals also often posted pictures of their bloody scrubs, or puddles of blood on emergency room floors -- the result of treating gunshot victims.

Doctors and medical officials have increasingly taken on gun violence as a public health issue. Last month, the American College of Physicians issued new guidelines for doctors to follow in helping protect patients from firearms dangers, and published several reports on gun violence in its flagship publication, the Annals of Internal Medicine.

“We need to ask our patients about firearms, counsel them on safe firearm behaviors, and take further action when an imminent hazard is present,” Dr. Garen Wintemute, of the Violence Prevention Research Program at the University of California Davis Medical Center, wrote in one editorial in the magazine.

On Wednesday, the NRA took issue with the ACP, which represents more than 150,000 internal medicine specialists. “Someone should tell self-important anti-gun doctors to stay in their lane,” the group tweeted.
https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/nra-opens-social-media-war-doctors-over-firearms-n934056

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! So the underlying message that I’m getting is that the NRA is basically telling doctors to go fuck themselves and the people who treat gunshot victims don’t know anything about guns. So that happened. Oh and they’re further rubbing salt in the wound.

I called into the morgue last Friday to find out what my day’s workload was going to be.

“One gunshot suicide and two other autopsies, probably natural.”

Not a busy day, by any means. It was part of a perfectly ordinary week working as a forensic pathologist in Oakland, California. A couple of days earlier, I had pulled out two 9mm bullets from the body of a middle-aged man. The previous week, it was a 30-something, shot in the back.

Right after I got off the phone, I saw a tweet from the National Rifle Association telling doctors to “stay in their lane” — their response to the American College of Physicians’ updated gun safety guidelines. That was just hours before a man with a handgun and a high-capacity magazine shot dead 12 people in a bar in Thousand Oaks, California, and less than two weeks after a man with an assault rifle shot dead 11 people in a Pittsburgh synagogue. Angered, I fired back a response, shut off my phone, and began my day.
https://www.vox.com/first-person/2018/11/12/18087262/doctors-guns-thousand-oaks-nra

Damn right! I mean is it any wonder that the evil fucking organization known as the NRA got their ass handed to them in the last election? That was sweet! In case you don’t know what I am talking about this is what happened.

"We endorsed well over 300 people in the country and won most of those races," said Peter Ambler, executive director of Giffords, a political action committee formed by Gabby Giffords, the former Arizona congresswoman wounded in a shooting.

"We were across the map," he said. "It wasn't a niche local issue. We were on the offensive in blue, red and purple states."

Spending to support candidates backing tougher gun control surged this year, even as campaign spending by the NRA declined. The Giffords PAC spent nearly $5 million. Everytown for Gun Safety, a group founded by former New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg, pledged $30 million for this year's elections and continued to put new money into competitive races in the final days.
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/11/09/gun-control-is-winning-issue-in-midterms-as-advocates-gain-in-house-defy-nra.html

And by the way, if you’re wondering about that NRA “A” rating from your local congressman, it’s about to become as toxic as being endorsed by big tobacco used to be.

When the Columbine High School massacre happened near here in 1999, many felt it would galvanize gun control efforts. Others thought the same in 2012, when a gunman killed 12 moviegoers at a midnight screening of “The Dark Knight Rises.”

Aurora’s experience with mass gun violence stretches back to 1993, when a former employee entered a Chuck E. Cheese’s and killed four people. The district has more registered Democrats than Republicans, and by presidential election results, it is slightly bluer than the nation as a whole.

Yet four successive Democrats have failed to unseat Representative Mike Coffman, a Republican with consistent A ratings from the National Rifle Association and more campaign contributions from the group than any other member of Colorado’s congressional delegation.

This year, however, Jason Crow — an Army veteran who wants to ban assault weapons, restrict high-capacity magazines and expand background checks — appears poised to defeat Mr. Coffman. A New York Times/Siena College poll last month showed Mr. Crow leading by nine points. [Read more about that poll here.] Mr. Crow has also raised some $1.6 million more than Mr. Coffman.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/11/04/us/politics/gun-control-candidates-election.html

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates
[br] [/font] [br]

Hey Denver it’s time to investigate beyond the headlines! This is Top 10 Investigates.

California’s proposition system always gains national attention during any given election year, and they are always a mixed bag. But this election season one proposition has stood out above all the rest, and that is Proposition 8. Prop 8 was supposed to regulate the dialysis industry. So proposition 8 would have put a cap on profits from the Dialysis industry – an industry that very badly needs to be regulated, but voters have rejected that proposition.

Proposition 8 fell flat at the polls Tuesday, with voters rejecting the measure that would have capped revenue made by the state’s dialysis clinics.

The union-backed measure broke campaign spending records and sparked fierce debate, with both sides vehemently arguing their position was the one that would protect the 80,000 kidney disease patients in California who rely on life-saving dialysis treatment every month. But Prop. 8 was trailing by a double-digit margin Tuesday night, as opponents cheered its defeat.

“Prop. 8 would have harmed vulnerable dialysis patients by restricting access to life-saving dialysis treatments. Thankfully voters made the smart, compassionate decision to reject it,” Dr. Theodore Mazer, former president of the California Medical Association, wrote in a news release.

Prop. 8 would have forced dialysis clinics to refund revenue exceeding more than 115 percent of the cost of caring for patients. Refunds of up to $100,000 would have gone to insurance providers and patients who pay out of pocket.
https://www.mercurynews.com/2018/11/06/early-election-results-voters-reject-prop-8-cap-on-dialysis-profits/

Kidney health is nothing to joke about, and apparently voters in California sided with the ads put on by dialysis companies like Davita and voted to basically give them unlimited amounts of money and they don’t need to be as regulated as they were before. So they’re saying regulation is bad. Here’s what it could have done.

Roughly 140,000 Californians spend the equivalent of a part-time job — 12 to 20 hours a week — in a dialysis clinic, where a machine functioning as a kidney filters waste out of their blood.

It’s a tricky procedure — and right now it’s at the center of a heated political battle between labor unions and dialysis companies.

Californians will vote in November on Proposition 8, which would regulate dialysis clinic spending. It’s a move that could either improve patient conditions or degrade them, depending on who you ask.

So far, it’s the most expensive proposition on the ballot, with supporters putting in $20 million and opponents fighting back with $99 million as of October 11.
https://www.ijpr.org/post/why-proposition-8-one-most-contentious-and-confusing-california-ballot-measures#stream/0

More please. So just how much money did the dialysis companies raise to defeat this measure? Well the numbers are absolutely astonishing, and the ads ran practically non stop. But really how did proposition 8 get started? It was pretty much a dispute between one of the largest labor unions for dialysis clinics and Davita – an evil corporation.

More money has gone toward advertisements for Proposition 8 than any other proposition on this November’s ballot.

Prop. 8 has to do with dialysis and how dialysis clinics conduct their business.

One in seven American adults has chronic kidney disease. In California, 66,000 people have conditions so severe that they require dialysis at least three times a week. It’s a life-saving treatment.

“This is a dialysis machine and this is the dialyzer,” explained Violette McClain, a local dialysis nurse who is against on Prop. 8. “So this is basically like an artificial kidney and this is what our patients depend on to filter their blood, remove the toxins, remove the fluid.”

Proposition 8 would essentially cap dialysis clinic revenue at 15 percent. It would require clinics to refund their patients or their insurers if their revenue exceeds the 15-percent cap.
https://ksby.com/news/decision-2018/2018/10/23/prop-8-differing-opinions-on-how-dialysis-patients-would-be-affected

So voters overwhelmingly rejected the calls for dialysis clinics to be regulated and instead rewarded evil corporations like Davita for their bad behavior. And in case you were wondering – both Davita and their owner Warren Buffet – profited handsomely from their reckless spending and horribly worded advertising.

Watch these stock sectors after ballot measures results
Watch these stock sectors after ballot measures results
1:10 PM ET Wed, 7 Nov 2018 | 01:43

DaVita shares soared Wednesday after California voters rejected a ballot measure that would have capped the amount of money dialysis providers in the state can earn on certain patients.

Sixty-one percent of voters said "no" to Proposition 8 in Tuesday's midterms.

Pushed by the Service Employees International Union, the measure would have limited the revenue dialysis providers could earn through rates from privately insured patients to 115 percent of the costs to provide the care. Anything above would be put to dialysis providers, which would be forced to give insurers or patients rebates to make up the difference.

"We are grateful that Californians voted down Proposition 8," DaVita said in a statement Wednesday, "It's disappointing that the SEIU-UHW used the ballot initiative process as leverage in pursuing their own objectives, despite the potential harmful consequences to nearly 70,000 California dialysis patients."
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/11/07/buffett-owned-davita-jumps-after-voters-reject-cap-on-dialysis-revenue.html

There you have it, we officially live in the Matrix. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
[br] [/font] [br]

Gather around, my fair brothers and sisters of Denver, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate! For the Holy Church of the Top 10 has convened and it’s our weekly duty to remind you why the holiest among us are also the most full of:

My fair congregation, we usually don’t get news this good around here, but in the wake of last week’s election we must celebrate this one with revels. I’m of course talking about the end of the reign of a favored soul of the hardcore Christian right – supporters of the Dark One, and Kim Davis. Yes, the Kentucky clerk who refused to do her job and became a hero of Christian bigots everywhere, now, is no mas! And I have to say as a man of GAWD, that one was sweet!

Rowan County, Kentucky, clerk Kim Davis, who made headlines in 2015 for her protests against same-sex marriage, will lose her job after the midterm elections.

Davis, a Republican, lost to Democratic challenger Elwood Caudill. Caudill got 4,210 votes, or 54.1 percent, and Davis got 3,566, or 45.9 percent.

Davis received a lot of national attention in 2015 when, after the Supreme Court legalized same-sex marriage nationwide, she refused to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples, citing her religious objections. After she was jailed for defying courts and refusing to do her job, some evangelicals, including Republican Mike Huckabee, rallied behind her. But ultimately, Davis agreed to let her deputies issue marriage licenses and was released from jail.

As Will Wright explained for the Lexington Herald Leader, Caudill previously lost by just 23 votes in the Republican primary for the seat in 2014. But he changed parties in 2015. Caudill then went on to beat David Ermold, one of the gay men Davis denied a marriage license, in the Democratic primary this year.
https://www.vox.com/identities/2018/11/7/18072228/midterm-election-results-kentucky-clerk-kim-davis

Ooh that felt good! Now usually we don’t kick people when they are down here in my church, but considering that Sister Kim made an entire career out of doing exactly that, exceptions must be made, and we will adhere to that! So what is Sister Kim planning on doing after being fired? Well, this was totally not unexpected.

Kim Davis is going to pursue a career in evangelical ministry after she lost her job as a county clerk in the election.

Davis rose to fame in 2015 when she refused to give a marriage license to a gay couple – citing her religious beliefs – after the Supreme Court legalized marriage equality in every state. She then said that she would give no one a marriage license, so that she would treat everyone equally.

A judge told that she had to issue marriage licenses, and she spent several nights in jail for contempt of court when she refused to follow the judge’s order.

Last week, Davis lost her reelection campaign for County Clerk in Rowan County, Kentucky.
https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2018/11/now-kim-davis-fired-voters-shes-going-become-preacher/

I think even somewhere the good LAWRD JAYSUS is saying “do not want”. I mean really how can someone who’s been divorced 4 times somehow be a champion of marriage? It seems to me that would be a bit hypocritical wouldn’t it? And JAYSUS hated the hypocrites! Can I get an amen?? By the way if you’re wondering why Davis lost, well, here’s a bit of insider info for you:

But Kappes thinks this was the biggest reason Davis didn’t get re-elected: Regardless of their feelings about gay marriage, many people resented her refusal to obey the law and do her job. “I heard that from a lot of folks,” he said. “They said she didn’t do her sworn duty.”

House, who grew up in Laurel and Leslie counties and now teaches at Berea College, has focused much of his fiction on portraying Appalachia as a complicated place that defies stereotypes. He is executive producer of “Hillbilly”, an award-winning new documentary film by directors Ashley York and Sally Rubin, that seeks to show the new diversity of voices emerging from the region.

It is ironic that Davis, the symbol, would have come out of Morehead, House said. But, he said, much of the region remains hostile to gay people. He points to the region’s strong support for President Donald Trump’s anti-diversity agenda.

“It’s a constant heartache that I can’t live in Eastern Kentucky as a gay man,” he said. “The voters keep telling me they don’t want us.”
https://www.kentucky.com/news/local/news-columns-blogs/tom-eblen/article221304285.html

You know here’s the thing – at my church you can come and worship freely as you please! There are no judgements here, other than from the almighty himself! And he’s cool with whatever you are cool with, it says so in the Good Book! But what I don’t want is Christian bigots forcing their own interpretation of the law on me! Thank you! But apparently Sister Kim still wants a piece of that sweet sweet spotlight!

In the wake of the 2018 midterm elections, political pundits noted that the so-called “blue wave” turned out to be more of a rainbow. With over 150 LGBTQ candidates winning races across the country, Tuesday was a night of many firsts: a gay governor in Colorado, lesbian congresswomen in Kansas and Minnesota, two trans women in the New Hampshire state legislature, and the list goes on.

However, it was one Republican incumbent’s loss in a closely-watched race in Kentucky that set the Internet ablaze. I’m talking, of course, about Kim Davis, who came up about 700 votes shy of her Democratic opponent, Elwood Caudill, Jr., in her re-election bid to the Rowan County Clerk’s Office.

Following her loss, national media outlets from the New York Times to the Advocate ran clickbait-worthy headlines, and incendiary status updates spread across social media like wildfire. In the midst of all the righteous schadenfreude over Ms. Davis’ fate — well deserved as it was — one person was conspicuously missing from the national conversation: David Ermold.

<snip>

Then, just as quickly as the spotlight emerged on the otherwise quiet town of Morehead, Ky., a town of just over 7,000 people, the cameras all but disappeared after the primary, and David Ermold became another name lost in the media frenzy. Hardly anyone outside the state noticed, for example, that Ermold refused to support Caudill, who won the Democratic nomination by over 1,000 votes. If they did notice, no one bothered to dive deeper and ask why. (Ermold did not respond to an email request for an interview for this story, and, as far as I can tell, has avoided most other media outlets since the primary.)
https://www.intomore.com/impact/kim-davis-continues-to-steal-a-spotlight-she-doesnt-deserve

So there you have it, Sister Kim lost her seat to a man who she denied a marriage license to! That is some sweet, sweet karma there! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: Drag Queen Story Hour
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time for another edition of:

Let’s be honest here – everybody loves a good story no matter who’s telling it, or who they are telling it to. So why is reading stories to children such a bad thing? Well if you’re in the south and your child has stories read to them by drag queens, well, it might be the worst fucking thing in the world, you are disrespecting Jesus, oh my god, are you fucking crazy??? Yeah probably. You know these days the subject of gender fluidity is a very tricky one and children need to be taught to be more accepting, but considering the “role models” they have at their disposal, is it any wonder why we’re fucked? Take a look at this story out of Houston, Texas. They say everything is bigger in Texas, especially the assholes!

Storytime for preschoolers at the Loussac Library may not sound like a controversial topic, but people have been complaining about an event where the readers are drag queens.

Drag queen storytimes are endorsed by the American Library Association, and like many libraries across the country the Loussac has hosted several.

Last week Jim Minnery, head of Christian group Alaska Family Action, sent an email to supporters in which he called the storytimes "alarming." The email condemned "using taxpayer funded public libraries to talk with impressionable young children about 'gender fluidity.'" He urged people to contact the library and ask that future events be canceled.

When KTVA asked Minnery for further comment, he responded that he was "too busy" for an interview or statement.

Torgeson said so far she's received 29 negative comments. Most, she said, express concern about normalizing what the senders see as deviant behavior.
https://www.ktva.com/story/39422111/loussac-librarys-drag-queen-storytime-draws-detractors

And really, why the fuck is a “family group” in Alaska concerned about a children’s story time in Houston, Texas? God forbid that children should be taught about gender identities at a young age, I mean what would Jesus think? Well the thing is Christian conservative assholes are everywhere, and it seems the more devoted they are, the bigger the insufferable asshole they are. And Houston was no the only community where this bullshit happened. Take a look at what happened in Lafayette, Louisiana where this happened.

Government building to voice their opinions in relation to the upcoming Drag Queen Story Time hosted by members of Delta Lambda Phi fraternity, scheduled for Oct. 6 at the Lafayette Public Library.

The room was packed beyond capacity, leaving people to wait in the hallways for their chance to take a seat inside. It was abuzz with chattering long before the meeting started.

“I’m here to testify to the council that the library is no place to introduce either sexually-oriented material or politics to three-to-six-year-olds,” said Gene Mills, president of the Louisiana Family Forum.

Mills is one of many that came in opposition of the event.

Mills, and those of similar opinion, says this is a question of legality, not intolerance.

“We filed a federal lawsuit to stop the library from hosting the Drag Queen Story Hour based upon the unconstitutionality of it,” said Rich Penkoski, founder and pastor with Warriors for Christ, a controversial Christian group that began as an online ministry through Facebook. The group, which the Christian Broadcasting Network cites as having more than 225,000 followers, has seen trouble in the past with violating Facebook’s community standards by “promoting hate speech.”
https://www.thevermilion.com/news/constitutionality-of-drag-queen-story-time-questioned-lawsuits-filed/article_886ae5b2-d0eb-11e8-8c0e-23bf511299e6.html

Good point! And where in the Constitution does it even remotely say that drag queen story hour is unconstitutional? I don’t remember that amendment! And I’m not at all surprised that a group called “Warriors For Christ” got caught violating Facebook’s hate speech policy. Not at all! But as crazy as these people are, they managed to get one shut down in Illinois.

Elizabeth Johnston, a right-wing activist better known as the “Activist Mommy,” spoke at the Values Voter Summit today, where she asserted that sex ed programs in public schools are promoting illegal “obscenity” and must be shut down because they are part of a grand “war on our children.”

“They are obscenity, legal obscenity,” Johnston declared. “That should not be allowed. This is pandering obscenity to minors.”

After praising a recent successful effort to shut down a Drag Queen Story Hour in Illinois, Johnston called on right-wing activists to “get aggressive” and to ready themselves to wage war.

“It is past time for us, guys, to get aggressive about protecting our children’s innocence,” she said. “Conservatives have been playing much too nice with these degenerates. This is war. This is war on our children.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/elizabeth-johnston-conservatives-have-been-playing-much-too-nice-with-these-degenerates/

Hey, you support a guy who literally locked children in cages, you don’t get to decide what’s good for children or not anymore. Fuck off! And by the way, in case you were wondering, a judge smacked down the Christian’s claims:

Chief U.S. District Judge Lee H. Rosenthal put it simply in her four sentence order, issued just days after the lawsuit — blasting gay marriage and transgender public events— was filed against Mayor Sylvester Turner and Rhea Lawson, the head of the city’s library system. The judge explained the four litigants applied for injunction to halt the story hour on the grounds that it violated the freedom or religion clause in the Constitution and said, “There is no basis to support the requested relief. The application is denied.”

Tex Christopher, a 45-year-old Houston businessman who is one of the people who filed the lawsuit, said he is taking the judge’s denial in stride and looking forward to making his arguments in court that drag queens and transgender storytellers indoctrinate children to believe in another religion, which he identifies as Secular Humanism.

“I’m taking a stand for righteousness,” Christopher said. “I’m calling out Mayor Turner.”
https://www.chron.com/news/houston-texas/houston/article/Judge-rejects-conservative-Christian-group-s-13334135.php

[font size="8"]Ron DeSantis
[br] [/font] [br]

Politicians at the state, national and local levels who are so toxic that you ever wonder how they were able to get into office, much less stay there. This is:

This week – Florida’s new governor Ron DeSantis. While many thought that the racial barrier was torn down when Obama was elected president, Ron DeSantis put it back up, put barbed wire and ran an electrical current through the whole thing. So here’s the thing with elections – American citizens not living in America have the right to vote too, and Gov. DeSantis hasn’t exactly realized that.

He had barely gotten off the stage after giving his victory speech at an Orlando hotel on Election Night when Ron DeSantis was asked about his schedule for the days ahead.

"When I stepped down from Congress, part of it was I knew I wasn't going to be making the votes while I was campaigning," he told reporters Tuesday. "But even more significant was thinking after the election, you have to put together a government … we've been doing this quietly behind the scenes — not to be presumptuous, but just because you don't have enough time (after the election)."

Things have changed a bit since then.

DeSantis' margin of victory shrank in the days after Election Day to fall within the 0.5 percentage point gap that triggers a recount by tabulation machines (making the governor's race the third statewide race to fall into a recount, along with U.S. Senate and commissioner of agriculture).
http://www.tampabay.com/florida-politics/buzz/2018/11/12/as-recounts-rage-on-ron-desantis-begins-transition-to-power/

Yes that was probably the election that the Florida GOP had on election night. After all, if you want a window into Ron DeSantis’ racism, you should check out some of his greatest hits.

Audience members attending the final gubernatorial debate between Tallahassee Mayor Andrew Gillum and former Republican Rep. Ron DeSantis erupted in cheers after Gillum challenged DeSantis for giving speeches at far-right events and accepting donations from a person who called former President Barack Obama a racial slur.

"How the hell am I supposed to know every single statement somebody makes?" DeSantis said, visibly agitated. "I am not going to bow down to the altar of political correctness."

Gillum took note of DeSantis' answer and recounted an allegory: "My grandmother used to say a hit dog will holler," Gillum said. "And it hollered through this room."

"Mr. DeSantis has spoken, first of all, he's got neo-Nazis helping him out in this state," Gillum said. "He has spoken at racist conferences, he's accepted a contribution, and would not return it, from someone who referred to the former president of the United States as a Muslim 'n----r.'"
https://www.businessinsider.com/andrew-gillum-debate-ron-desantis-racists-believe-he-is-racist-2018-10

In case you’re wondering just how racist Ron DeSantis is, he’s pretty damn racist. So racist that he was a moderator on a racist Facebook group that had a whopping 52 moderators operating at all times because people were apparently posting some pretty horrible things.

On social media on Thursday, liberal groups and activists said that Congressman Ron DeSantis, the Republican nominee for Florida governor, was moderating a massive Facebook group with racist posts and conspiracy theories.

DeSantis' membership in the group was first noted by American Ledger, which is run by the liberal group American Bridge.

"It appears @RonDeSantisFL was moderating hate group on FB that regularly attacked on race and attacked Parkland survivors," tweeted Fred Guttenburg, whose daughter, Jaime, was killed in the Parkland shooting, and has since become a prominent gun control advocate. "If true this is bad."

DeSantis denied through a spokesman on Thursday that he ever led the group or even knew he had been added to it. He "immediately" left it when notified of the controversy, the spokesman said.
https://www.tampabay.com/florida-politics/buzz/2018/08/31/did-ron-desantis-moderate-a-far-right-facebook-group/

And by the way what’s wrong with Florida? A whole lot if you ask us. While most of the election drowned out Trump with a blue wave, Florida’s voters had literally the opposite effect.

Republican Ron DeSantis won Florida governor’s election in part by turning the race into a referendum on Donald Trump.

After a primary ad in which he built a wall and read “The Art of the Deal” with his kids, DeSantis was helped by the president’s involvement in the race, even as his Democratic opponent Andrew Gillum took hard lines against Trump’s actions at the national level.

With 99% of the votes accounted for, DeSantis was ahead of Gillum by more than 75,000, NBC reported late Tuesday night.

For his part, Gillum, the Tallahassee mayor, presented a platform that was in stark contrast to the President’s on national policies that governors have little control over. He advocated for “Medicare for All” before admitting that Florida likely couldn’t accomplish a single-payer system on its own, called for the abolishment of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), a federal agency, in its current form, and was vocal about the importance of DACA, a federal immigration policy.
http://time.com/5445200/ron-desantis-florida-governors-election-results/

Yes, yes it was. Florida apparently rejected liberal ideas of tolerance and inclusion and instead voted for all the things that Trump stands for. And in case you’re wondering if the possible recount will have any effect this, well, this is 2018 where hate reigns supreme.

Amid the violations of law by Broward and Palm Beach County elections officials, the data provides apparent good news for Republicans. First, despite the national media's typical laziness and derelictions, the local press has largely been assiduous and conscientious -- certain framing aside. Second, core concerns raised by leading Republicans (some of which were rhetorically overblown) have been validated by multiple judges. The ineptitude and misconduct has not gone unnoticed. Third, in spite of Democratic lawyers' best efforts, Republican leads in key races are likely insurmountable. National Review's Charles C.W. Cooke has been following this closely, and relayed his analysis over the weekend, with recounts underway:

Based on Cooke's calculations -- which bake in several highly favorable assumptions for Democrats (in some cases, implausibly so) -- both major stateside Republicans are in good shape:

He even runs through a scenario under which Bill Nelson's Broward County "undervote" is deemed attributable to some sort of nefarious problem, under which Democratic attorneys could make (unrealistic) headway. In that unlikely case, DeSantis would nevertheless be fine, but Rick Scott's lead would dwindle down to vulnerable territory -- although he'd still be ahead:
https://townhall.com/tipsheet/guybenson/2018/11/12/analysis-its-almost-certain-that-rick-scott-and-ron-desantis-have-won-in-florida-n2535731

There you have it, Florida is about to go down a very dangerous road, and they often decide our elections. So that makes Ron DeSantis another one of the:

[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
[br] [/font] [br]

Hit it!

So of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. I want to start with this story out of where else? Florida. Because you know that America’s most penis shaped state always has the craziest news out of it. And I feel like it’s almost obligatory that news outlets begin their stories with the words “Florida Man…” or “Florida Woman…”. So if you’re arrested by the police for anything, maybe don’t give them a name that was pulled from a prank phone call.

On Tuesday, a sheriff’s deputy asked a man to leave a park in Palm Harbor, a St. Petersburg suburb. In an arrest affidavit, the cop noted that John Chestnut Park closed at 6 PM and, as such, he was preparing to issue a trespass warning to the parkgoer.

Asked to identify himself, “the defendant responded by stating his name was ‘Ben Dover,’” Deputy K. Baldwin noted.

The man then gave the cop the middle finger and got in the deputy’s face “as if he was going to hit him.” The man then fled on foot, but was apprehended after a short chase.

“Dover,” as it turned out, was actually Andrew Leighton, a 22-year-old Palm Harbor resident. Seen above, Leighton was charged with two misdemeanors: obstruction by a disguised person and resisting an officer. He was released from the county jail early yesterday morning upon posting $300 bond.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/florida/ben-dover-arrest-490172

I’m sure you do, Moe! Next up, we’re going to the Volunteer State, Tennessee. And this sounds like the perfect scene for a crime-based comedy, and I could totally see Melissa McCarthy in the role. And you know the old saying… how does it go? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me… you wont get fooled again. That’s right, a former president said that once!

Police estimated $500 worth of damage to a city restaurant occurred when a naked Kingsport, Tennessee woman fell through the roof twice Tuesday evening.

Harley C. Morton, 26, is charged with criminal trespassing, vandalism and disorderly conduct and was nude from the waist down when investigators took her into custody at Cook Out on East Stone Drive, according to Kingsport Police Department records obtained Wednesday by WCYB.

The report said Morton gained access into the ceiling just after 11 p.m. by entering an unauthorized area with stairs that led to the roof then pried open a screen to an air conditioning vent.

A Cook Out employee told an officer that Morton partially fell through a ceiling tile in the kitchen then pulled herself back into the roof area and began running around. Investigators found broken support rails and busted ceiling tile on the floor and then found Morton's wallet and other ID on the roof, the report said.
https://wcyb.com/news/local/naked-kingsport-woman-charged-after-falling-through-ceiling-at-restaurant

Well said! Next up we go to Tennessee’s neighboring state, Indiana for this one. Here’s the thing, if you have a problem with your crack dealers, maybe don’t get the police involved. Because it will end badly for both them and you!

According to an Evansville Police Department report, Kenneth Dewayne Woods, 62, came to the police records department and disclosed that he “bought some crack cocaine over a period of time on credit” from a female dealer and her boyfriend.

Woods told police that he has not paid the duo the $400 he owes for the crack cocaine.

In light of his unpaid narcotics bill, Woods said, his dealers are now threatening to run him out of town, vandalize his car, and shoot him. Additionally, owing to interest, the dealers now contend that they are owed $500, said Woods.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/crack/crack-dealer-complaint-395021

Next up – we got to go to the Lone Star state for this one, and you really cant make this stuff up. Really, if you’re going to rob a store, maybe don’t do it wearing a very easily identifiable Halloween costume:

A Texas woman reportedly robbed a convenience store in Houston on November 1st while wearing bits and pieces of what sounds like a Halloween outfit left over from the night before: a giant fluffy dog costume head and a pair of wings. After allegedly making off with some loot—about $10 cash and some smokes—she led police on a car chase before being apprehended. Apparently, the wings did not help her flee.

According to The Smoking Gun, Colleen Dickens, a 30-year-old mother of two, was charged with two felony charges of robbery and evading arrest with a motor vehicle. She's currently being held at the Harris County Jail on a $12,500 bond. It's not clear if she wore the dog head while driving the getaway car, but the original report claims she was wearing it when she emerged from the car after the short chase was over.

Her Pulitzer Prize-worthy mugshot shows a blurry Dickens with a towel held over her mouth by a rubber-glove-wearing corrections officer; according to the report, she was attempting to spit on her jailers. No word on if a rolled-up newspaper—or, more humanely, a clicker—was employed by the arresting officers at any point.
http://www.thedrive.com/news/24785/texas-woman-wearing-giant-dog-head-leads-houston-cops-on-car-chase-after-alleged-robbery

I can imagine the corrections officers had a field day with that story! Finally this week – Tide laundry detergent. I mean really, did we learn *NOTHING* from the Tide Pod fiasco? Well, wait until you see the latest design that Tide has come up with and I wish I was making this up but I am not:

https://twitter.com/CNNBusiness/status/1061381764650885126

It’s been just about a year since the earliest whispers of the Tide Pod–eating trend made their way out of the deepest caverns of Tumblr and onto the mainstream web. (In case you’ve forgotten, you can refresh your memory here. The short of it was that people weren’t actually eating Tide Pods so much as joking about eating them in such a committed way it seemed as though they were.) Tide enlisted Rob Gronkowski of the New England Patriots to explain to people that they really shouldn’t eat Tide Pods. (A baby in Florida died in 2013 after ingesting a Tide Pod.) But as with most internet trends, Tide Pod mania went away as quickly as it arose. And Tide went back to just being soap. Until now.

On Friday, Procter & Gamble announced a new package for Tide detergent, designed specifically to make the product easier to ship. It now comes in a box, complete with a sealed bag of soap inside of it and a measuring cup for doing your wash. “The version uses 60 percent less plastic than shipping an equivalent 150 ounce bottle of Tide since it doesn’t require additional layers of cardboard boxing or bubble wrap,” CNN reports. “It’s lighter and takes up less space in a delivery truck — saving P&G money on shipping costs.” The new packaging also uses significantly less water. All this is good for the environment. It’s good for P&G, which can now sell more detergent at a lower cost. It’s good for Amazon, which now also gets to sell more detergent. And also … it’s good for anybody who was missing the Tide Pod meme, because if you looked at this thing and saw anything other than a soapy box of wine please seek medical attention pronto.
http://nymag.com/intelligencer/2018/11/tides-new-packaging-looks-like-boxed-wine.html

So tell me bartender, what should I pair this fine boxed laundry detergent with? A bowl of Tide Pods? I really can’t wait until we start seeing the Tide wine challenge – coming soon to an emergency room near you! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Deep State Diaries Episode 20: The FAA
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time for episode 20 of Deep State Diaries. Yes we’re touring the 24 branches and services that make up the United States government. Everything from the FBI to the IRS to the Pentagon to the CIA to the DPW to the DVA to parks and recreation and all branches and services in between. Of course if you’re here you probably already know more about our government and how it works than your average Fox News loving Trump supporter does. So that’s what this segment is going to address. We are going to do a deep dive into all that makes the United States the United States. Because we here at the Top 10 love to educate as well as entertain. Because we care.

[font size="6"]The FAA[/font]

?itok=ohRAnWjE

The Federal Aviation Administration is the board that monitors all of the air traffic coming into and out of the United States, as well as monitor everything about air travel such as our airports, airlines, and even airplanes. Everything from the seats that you sit in on your next flight to the food that passes for airline meals to the amount of airline seat that passes for leg room these days. So what does the FAA actually do? For you conspiracy theorists, no they don’t release chemtrails into the atmosphere that turns frogs gay and dries out the forests. Instead they do things like this:

The Senate’s top Democrat says the Federal Aviation Administration isn’t moving fast enough to roll out a plan to stop airlines from shrinking passengers’ seats.

Sen. Charles Schumer says federal officials should be doing more to comply with a law to establish minimum seat size standards for airplanes.

The law, part of a reauthorization bill passed in September, requires the FAA to set the seat-size guidelines. It gives the FAA a year to tackle shrinking seats and give an opportunity for the public to weigh in.

But the New York Democrat says the FAA must move faster. He says the agency hasn’t established a plan to “rein in” shrinking seats. The FAA said it “is working to address the provision in the reauthorization bill.”
https://www.whec.com/news/schumer-faa-too-slow-tackling-airline-seat-size-concerns/5141892/

And by the way speaking of turbulence, they do run a complaint department where you can actually submit your complaints about anything to do with flights or airports. But they might need to speed that process up a bit.

The feds must do more to stop airlines from shrinking seat sizes to jam in as many passengers as possible, Sen. Chuck Schumer said Sunday.

The Federal Aviation Administration is required to establish minimum seat size criteria under a provision pushed by Schumer this September.

Under that provision, the FAA has a year to tackle the shrinking seat issue, and give notice for the public to voice their opinions on the issue.

But the “FAA is not implementing the law” Schumer told reporters.

"FAA, do the study. Implement the law and get us back to the days when, even though the seats were tight, you could fit in to them without severe discomfort," he said.
http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/ny-metro-schumer-seat-size-faa-20181111-story.html

So what about when new planes get introduced? Like Boeing is planning to introduce the next version of its’ venerable 737, called the 737 next. So how does a plane get approved in order to start flying commercial service?

The U.S. Federal Aviation Administration and Boeing are evaluating the need for software or design changes to 737 MAX jets in the wake of last month's deadly Lion Air crash in Indonesia, the regulator said on Tuesday.

Boeing shares fell 2.1 percent on Tuesday on concerns related to the first crash of the newest version of the planemaker's best-selling jet, in which all 189 people on board were killed when it dived into the sea.

Indonesian investigators said on Monday a system designed to deal with the accident scenario was not described in the flight manual. They called for more training for 737 MAX pilots.

U.S. pilot unions later said they were not aware of the new anti-stall system.

Operating procedures and training for the 737 MAX could also change as the FAA and Boeing learn more from the investigation, the regulator said in a statement.
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/11/14/faa-boeing-study-need-for-737-max-software-changes-after-crash.html

Yeah so maybe don’t do that. And really there’s nothing to joke about when it comes to planes and commercial travel, though every comedian has their airport chunk. Shit, that’s such a cliché anymore that literally anyone can do it. And no, for you Infowars fans out there who may happen to stumble upon this, there’s no chemtrails in the air that make you get polio and turn the frogs gay, but the environment definitely needs some cleaning up.

TRC, a leading provider of end-to-end engineering, consulting and construction management solutions fueled by innovative technology, has been awarded a nine-year, $36 million contract from the Federal Aviation Administration to oversee remediation of an FAA-owned Superfund site in Atlantic County, N.J.

The contract involves the 5,000-acre William J. Hughes Technical Center, which is eight miles northwest of Atlantic City and includes Atlantic City International Airport.

"TRC is proud to be assisting the FAA with this important project to restore and protect the environment in and around the nation's premier air transportation research facility," said Paul Arnold, TRC's vice president of engineering, construction and remediation. "Not only is this work critically important to the FAA, but also Atlantic City area residents, businesses and visitors.

Under the Superfund Architect/Engineer Environmental Services contract, TRC will lead remedial investigation, risk assessment and design work, including innovative in situ technologies and remediation of aviation fuels, pesticides, heavy metals, PCBs, mercury and emerging contaminants such as per- and polyfluoroalkyl substances (PFAS). More than 30 areas of concern with potential or actual environmental impacts have been identified at the site.
https://www.aviationpros.com/news/12436567/trc-wins-36-million-contract-to-oversee-clean-up-of-faa-superfund-site-in-new-jersey

Also if you’re going to be doing any funny business in the air, you might want to make sure that you have a permit for that, otherwise the FAA is going to come down on you faster than Trump comes down on a Big Mac.

The Federal Aviation Administration is examining how it approaches enforcement and fines for violations involving illegal charter operators that are unwilling or unable to comply with regulations, a senior agency official recently told attendees at the NATA 2018 Aviation Leadership Conference. “There’s been a reexamination of how much regulation is appropriate,” said John Duncan, FAA deputy associate administrator for aviation safety.

FAA enforcement was among several issues highlighted during the Aviation Leadership Conference, which also tackled workforce issues, looking at new models of service, and elevating the safety of Part 135 operations. More than 100 registrants attended the event, which also included the participation of National Transportation Safety Board chairman Robert Sumwalt and many other business leaders.

When asked what FAA has been doing about illegal charter operators, Duncan said the agency’s approach is to make sure operators have the proper education and understanding regarding how they need to comply. The FAA can approach compliance issues through its non-punitive Compliance Philosophy that establishes compliance actions, rather than enforcement, to address the problems, he added.
https://www.bjtonline.com/business-jet-news/faa-weighs-penalties-for-illegal-charter#

[font size="6"]Score Card [/font]

Overall importance: A
How Things Are Going: C
Likely hood To Survive: B+

Overall: B

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

We’re off next week but when we come back we’ll take a look at an organization that’s been in the news a lot lately – the United States Census Bureau!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Nathaniel Raetliff & The Night Sweats[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen my next guest is a great band from Denver, you can see them on tour

Thank you very much Colorado Podcast Festival! We’ll be back soon! We are off next week for Thanksgiving, we’ll be running a best of in the meantime, and then we’ll be back on 11/28 with a brand new edition! See you in two weeks! Happy Thanksgiving!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Denver Convention Center, Denver, CO
Special Thanks To: Colorado Podcast Festival
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: Littleton High School Choir Club, Littleton, CO
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
Jack White Appears Courtesy Of:
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: [email protected]

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

November 7, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-19: The Blue Wave Begins Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-19: The Blue Wave Begins Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! What’s up Orlando? Yes, we are finally here! I know I joke about all the crazy shit that comes out of Florida but you guys really came through for this one! So I don’t know if anyone noticed but we had an election yesterday! But… yeah we’ll get to that in a minute but first we got to do a thing, And that is that politics makes for some strange bedfellows doesn’t it? And of course by that I mean I don’t know if you’ve been following the Axl Rose vs Trump brew ha ha, but it’s magical. So Trump has been for some reason playing “Sweet Child O’Mine” at his MAGA rallies. But really I’d be willing to bet that he’s never actually read the lyrics of that song. He also got hit hard by Rhianna. So now I may have to add Appetite For Destruction and Rhianna’s “Anti” album to my playlist, and hey why not? But one of my favorite things is when politicians use campaign songs and then they get called out by the artist as being full of shit. And I mean come on who’s more full of shit than Trump is these days? However, yes, this is one of my favorite things ever -w hen candidates use music, and then the artist has a problem with the use of their music. I mean come on conservatives, if you want to use music that speaks to you, use Ted Nugent. With all of the sex crimes happening, “Jailbait” would make a great anthem! What, too soon? I’ll show myself out. OK enough of the intro, we got a lot of idiocy to get to but first Bill Maher explains how important it is to GOTV:

So did everyone vote? Good! Because for the first slot this week we’re going to devote it to The Election (1) – and we will be presenting all of the highs and lows and ups and downs for you including California’s propositions and the DEMS TOOK THE HOUSE!!!! In the second slot this week is Sean Hannity (2) and whew, that guy needs a good punch in the face after what he did on Sunday. For the third slot this week, we have got to discuss the absolutely colossal fail that was Jacob Wohl and Jack Berkman (3) and whew, this has all the makings of a great Wes Anderson flick, or a marginal Coen Bros flick. At number 4 this week is of course Donald Trump (4) and we’re going to show you his reactions to the campaign as well as dissect his unbelievably insane last minute campaign ad that attempted to blame liberals, ah, fuck it, that’s all you need to know. For the fifth slot this week, is of course our weekly investigative piece “Top 10 Investigates” and this week we’re going to Wisconsin – what’s really going on with that much ballyhooed Foxconn deal? Well, we are going to tell you the latest and it’s not good. In the sixth slot is of course our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” (6) and this week our resident pastor is going to show you some batshit crazy religious right reactions to the election and GAWD’s plan for America. At number 7 is one of our favorite segments “Beating A Dead Horse” (7) – so last week we covered how Trump fans love to use false flag conspiracies to describe literally every tragedy that comes along. This week we’re going to tackle their other favorite bogeyman – George Soros. Yes, somehow he folds into the false flag conspiracies. Taking the 8th slot, the WWE (8) is targeting Saudi Arabia hard for a new audience, and after a lot of controversy, we’re going to ask – “WWE’s Crown Jewel: How Is This Still A Thing?”. Taking the 9th slot this week is neither People Are Dumb, or I Need A Drink, but we’re going to instead debut a brand new segment called “Ah, It Aint So Bad!” (9) in which we attempt to find the silver lining in a bunch of random news stories. Finally this week we’ve got the next installment of our ongoing series Deep State Diaries where we are going to take a look at the Department Of Defense! Plus we’ve got a musical guest I am very excited to have on, the men, the myth, the legend – Tenacious D is here! Really buy Post Apocalypto or you’re no friend of the show. Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Election Coverage: The Blue Wave Begins!
[br] [/font] [br]

The blue wave happened everybody! Well, it wasn’t a tsunami but we will gladly take what happened last night as a huge win! So the Blue Wave begins. It's going to take more than a few Blue Waves to completely wash the stink of Trump out of the room, though. Meanwhile while we didn’t win everything (fuck you Texas!), there were some huge pickups and some major wins for the dems. We won’t be able to get to everything this week, we will celebrate what we have so far. So we got to go over the plusses from last night and we won’t have time to get to all of them. But what you need to know is that, to quote Walter Sobchak from the Big Lebowski, Trump is in a world of pain. But this might be one of my favorite pieces of news last night:

The Kentucky clerk who went to jail in 2015 for refusing to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples lost her bid for a second term on Tuesday.

Kim Davis, the Republican incumbent, was defeated by Democrat Elwood Caudill Jr . in the election for clerk of Rowan County in northeastern Kentucky. Caudill won with 4,210 votes, or 54 percent, to 3,566, or 46 percent, for Davis.

"I believe that as a community we must continue to work together toward a more prosperous and cohesive Rowan County," Caudill said after his win, according to the Lexington Herald-Leader.

Davis became a national figure when she stopped issuing marriage licenses days after the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the U.S. Constitution guarantees same-sex couples the right to marry. The ruling overturned same-sex marriage bans nationwide. Davis cited her religious beliefs, saying she was acting under "God's authority." She was released from jail when her staff issued licenses in her absence.
https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/kentucky-clerk-jailed-over-gay-marriage-licenses-loses-re-election-n933451

That was sweet. And the hits just keep on coming. But one thing I do have to talk about is my home state of California where Dana Rohrabacher (R- Moscow) got his ass handed to him. Thank you Orange County!

I should post the 10 hour clip of that, but still… HA HA!!! Although we only have limited space here, we do have to talk about California’s propositions. To which… yeah fuck you. Californians bought into Davita’s propaganda and allowed them to basically run without being checked and will stand to gain unlimited profits from people’s suffering:

California voters said no on Tuesday to Proposition 8, the “Fair Pricing for Dialysis Act,” the ballot initiative campaign with the highest price tag in California's 2018 midterm elections.

The measure sought to cap how much profit healthcare providers can make from the kidney procedure. With more than half of precincts reporting as of 12:30 a.m. Wednesday, 61 percent of voters had said "no" to the measure.

Supporters and opponents of Proposition 8 contributed about $130 million during the 2018 campaign season. The state’s largest kidney dialysis providers — including industry giants Davita Dialysis, Fresenius Medical Care and U.S. Renal Care — spent some $99 million collectively to fight the proposition, while supporters, led by the Service Employees International Union-United Healthcare Workers West (SEIU-UHW), contributed in support of the measure.

Dialysis is a procedure that patients without properly functioning kidneys undergo to purify their blood of waste products. The procedure takes three or four hours. Most dialysis patients need the treatment three times per week and find it physically exhausting. Throughout California, roughly 80,000 people receive dialysis at the state’s 588 clinics each month. Although the procedure is perfomed at homes and in hospitals, most patients in need of dialysis rely on standalone specialty clinics.
https://www.desertsun.com/story/news/politics/elections/2018/11/07/california-election-results-residents-reject-prop-8-dialysis-profits/1917329002/

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I mean come on, did you not see John Oliver? We will do a deep dive on Prop 8 next week. Those commercials were infuriating. That one guy “What’s Prop 8 going to do for me?” Yeah, listen here, it will make it so that if you die or something happens to you, your family won’t get stuck paying your bills, which now is a very real possibility! Moving on though, there were many highs and lows that we won’t be able to get to this week but there is one other take away from this that we need to see – the battle lines are drawn!

WASHINGTON ― After eight unforgiving years in the minority, Democrats will once again control the House of Representatives, with a deeply divided nation handing their party a narrow advantage of around 10 seats in the House.

It wasn’t quite the wave that Democrats were hoping for. Even with a 9-point advantage in the popular vote, Republicans fended off the worst-case scenarios in the House and actually improved their majority in the Senate, as Indiana, Missouri and Florida ― states that voted for President Donald Trump in 2016 ― sent their Democratic senators packing.

But both parties will still be able to claim victories Tuesday. Democrats picking up the House effectively slows Trump’s presidency to a legislative crawl, while Republicans will point to their gains in the Senate to say voters still prefer their stark vision of governance.

In fact, one of the major lessons for Republicans may be that they need to embrace Trump’s style even more. A blue wave for Democrats never really materialized because Republicans were able to energize their own voters through a campaign full of racial anxiety and culture war items.
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/democrats-house-win_us_5be1fc28e4b0e84388909931

Yeah I can imagine that Trump and Pelosi will be meeting in January like that. Although I do want to briefly mention the Georgia governor race – whew, this is what some might call a “clusterfuck” and we will definitely keep an eye on the situation and report back next week, but whew, this is insane. And I don’t need to mention that the racist shitbag militia III%ers are planning a violent march in Atlanta if Stacy Abrams wins. Let’s just say that the shit is going to hit the fan either way.

The Georgia governor’s race between Democrat Stacey Abrams and Republican Brian Kemp is too close to call.

Georgia requires a candidate to get at least 50 percent of the vote to win outright, and although Kemp held a several-point lead as of early Wednesday morning, Abrams’ campaign said it expected the election to head to a runoff ― meaning voters would have to return to the polls on Dec. 4.

“There are tens of thousands of absentee ballots around the state, many of them we believe are Abrams voters,” said Lauren Groh-Wargo, Abrams’ campaign manager.

Kemp also expressed confidence in his odds. “There are votes left to count, but we have a very strong lead,” he said. “Folks, make no mistake, the math is on our side to win this election.”
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/stacey-abrams-brian-kemp-georgia-election_us_5be074fbe4b01ffb1d04c527

[font size="8"]Sean Hannity
[br] [/font] [br]

Is anyone really surprised that Sean Hannity pulled that movie cliché where the characters say they’re not going to do something only to do it in the next scene? No? Good. So if you need some further explanation, Sean Hannity is shockingly (not) evil. Really, if you were to use a James Bond villain metaphor, think of him as a more evil Elliot Carver from Tomorrow Never Dies, only with way less charisma. Here’s what happened.

Get ready for this story; it is so crazy, man. You are really going to laugh, okay? Ready?

On Sunday, Trump campaign Chief Operating Officer Michael Glassner announced via statement that Sean Hannity (and Rush Limbaugh) would-be special guests at a rally in Cape Girardeau, Missouri on Monday evening.

Then—hold on, you're totally gonna crack up—Monday at 11:02 a.m., Hannity, that smug Lego of a man, tweeted, "In spite of reports, I will be doing a live show from Cape Girardeau and interviewing Trump before the rally. To be clear, I will not be on stage campaigning with the President. I am covering final rally for my show. Something I have done in every election in the past." (The tweet is still up. Wait for it—this will pay off in a second. I can't wait to see your face.)

To The Washington Post, a Fox News spokesperson repeated that Hannity would absolutely not be appearing at the rally with the president, and how even would people have gotten that idea, and just to be safe, they had ordered Hannity return to New York. Are you hanging in with me?

And then! Monday night, (have you guessed yet?) Hannity, an anchor on Fox News, which is purportedly—but not actually— a "news network," actually did join Trump on stage, at the Cape Girardeau rally, just like we first thought!
https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/a24742183/sean-hannity-donald-trump-rally-fox-news/

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I mean come on do we really need to hear these two kiss each other’s asses the day before the election? No! And we don’t need to be reminded of how much Trump watches TV either. So just how much of a colossal dick move was this? Well, a whole lot, apparently!

For a grand finale to his campaign blitz Monday night, President Trump invited his advisers, including press secretary Sarah Sanders and Kellyanne Conway, and Trump's favorite Fox News pundits, Sean Hannity and Judge Jeanine Pirro, on stage in Cape Girardeau, Missouri, to sing his praises.

Fox News, however, said Tuesday it wasn't pleased with their talents' performances, calling it an "unfortunate distraction."

The Trump campaign had announced beforehand that conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity would join the president for his last rally as "special guests," but before the rally, Hannity denied he was appearing to campaign for the president.

"In spite of reports, I will be doing a live show from Cape Girardeau and interviewing President Trump before the rally," Hannity tweeted. "To be clear, I will not be on stage campaigning with the President. I am covering final rally for my show. Something I have done in every election in the past."
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/fox-news-calls-sean-hannitys-appearance-trump-rally/story?id=59002981

Oh come on! Fox News is so deep in Trump’s closet that they’re finding Christmas presents to each other, and you know that Hannity whispers sweet nothings in Trump’s ear every night! Yeah, just picture that scenario for a minute! And you can’t get that image out of your head, can you? Well, this was a colossal fuck up and a total dick move for Hannity and your racist uncle’s wife, Jeannie Pirro, but really we’re not at all that shocked. But like a good Trumper, Hannity just calls it “fake news”.

Fox News host Sean Hannity appeared on stage with President Trump at his Missouri rally late Monday to parrot his midterm campaign slogans—despite earlier insisting he would only be covering the event as a journalist. “I had no idea you were going to invite me up here,” he said, after noting that “all those people in the back are fake news.”

Trump’s campaign had released a statement Sunday billing Hannity as a “special guest” at the final rally before midterm elections. Soon after, Hannity released a statement on Twitter saying, “To be clear, I will not be on stage campaigning with the President. I am covering final rally for my show.” Fox News also released a statement stressing that Hannity would only be covering the rally. Fox News’ Jeanine Pirro, White House press secretary Sarah Sanders, and White House counselor Kellyanne Conway also appeared on stage with Trump to show their support.

On Tuesday, Fox News described Hannity’s appearance as an “unfortunate distraction,” and the primetime star tweeted that he was “surprised” by Trump’s request for him to appear on-stage. “This was NOT planned,” he emphasized, later adding that he was “not referring to my journalist colleagues at FOX
https://www.thedailybeast.com/hannity-campaigns-with-trump-at-missouri-rally-after-insisting-he-wouldnt

Seriously? You really expect us to believe that , Hannity? I mean if you believe that I’ve got Keurigs, NFL tickets and Taylor Swift merchandise to sell you. Because you guys all burned and destroyed that stuff, because, reasons. Oh and if you want to know the kinds of things they discussed at Trump’s latest rally, well, the same shit you’d come to expect by now. He actually said the Democrats losing the house would be meaningless. Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOO!! Fuck you. That would be like if the Red Sox won and then started peeing in the Dodgers fans’ mailboxes. Oh wait, that is something Red Sox fans would actually do.

Fox News host Sean Hannity took to Twitter as the final results of election night rolled in to say President Donald Trump scored a victory despite Democrats taking the House. Hannity said winning the house was “meaningless” and that the night was a big win for Trump.

Election night results showed Republicans retained control of the Senate through 2020, while it appeared all but certain Democrats would take the House.

“MOST in the media are absolutely clueless,” Hannity wrote on Twitter. “Tonight was a massive win 4 DJT & the ppl he campaigned 4- remember btwn the House & Senate Obama lost 69 seats, Clinton lost 60 seats- the democrats winning the house is meaningless.”

Trump himself dubbed the night a victory as well.

“Tremendous success tonight,” the president tweeted. “Thank you to all!”
https://www.newsweek.com/sean-hannity-says-democrats-winning-house-meaningless-agrees-trump-election-1204874

[font size="8"]Surefire Intelligence
[br] [/font] [br] ‘

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know that there was a plot by two rabid Trump fans – Jacob Wohl and Jack Berkman – to take down Robert Mueller. And it involved using the “#MeToo” movement as a weapon. Well, it turned out to be quite the colossal fail. Which is a huge step up from the epic fail – and the more you dig into this story the weirder it gets. And I mean that’s an understatement. This story was MADE for the Top 10. Let’s dig into it.

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font] [br]

Yeah so Trump has been hitting the campaign trail extremely hard in the last 2 weeks, and got to be honest, he looks like he’s had no sleep in the last 4. “I get the best sleep, OK!”. So we got to talk about this extremely horrible ad that he sponsored and produced. But I’m not gonna show it. What? No! Seriously, make me! In fact fuck this ad. It may be one of the worst, most insensitive and racist ads in history. It even drew comparisons to the Willie Horton ads from the 80s on Twitter and elsewhere. And I think the networks are agreeing with me.

Fox News and Fox Business will no longer air the President Donald Trump-approved campaign ad that many have decried as racist, according to a network executive.

“Upon further review, Fox News pulled the ad yesterday and it will not appear on either Fox News Channel or Fox Business Network,” said ad sales president Marianne Gambelli in a statement to Mediaite.

NBC drew outrage after the network aired Trump’s ad during Sunday Night Football.

The 30-second spot, a version of which Trump tweeted out last week to much outrage, warned of a “7,000-migrant caravan” approaching the U.S. border with Mexico. It also featured Luis Bracamontes, an undocumented immigrant convicted of murdering two sheriff’s deputies in 2014, falsely claiming that Democrats “let him into our country.”

Read more: https://www.mediaite.com/tv/fox-news-pulls-trump-caravan-ad-decried-as-racist/

Holy shit! When you’re too racist for Fox News, that’s pretty fucking racist. So Trump’s full on 1488 ad is so horrible that it’s making people uncomfortable. Is this the October surprise? Maybe! Well guess who else is pulling the ad? Facebook!

Facebook on Monday pulled down advertisements from President Donald Trump’s reelection campaign that sought to fire up conservative voters in two midterm battleground states with an ad deemed “racist” by major television broadcasters.

The company’s decision came after CNN, NBC, and Fox News had all pulled down the ad, which features a convicted cop-killer who was deported multiple times before he shot and killed two California sheriff’s deputies, and was released as a video by the Trump campaign last week.

Facebook soon followed suit. “This ad violates Facebook's advertising policy against sensational content so we are rejecting it. While the video is allowed to be posted on Facebook, it cannot receive paid distribution,” wrote a spokesperson for the company in an emailed statement.

The spokesperson said the ad violated the company’s policy against “sensational content” in advertisements. That policy prohibits “shocking, sensational, disrespectful or excessively violent content” in paid ads. “This includes dehumanizing or denigrating entire groups of people and using frightening and exaggerated rumors of danger.”.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/trump-runs-racist-ad-on-facebook-targeting-arizona-and-florida

You said it, Dave! See, conservatives, this is why you’re getting kicked off social media sites. It’s not some vast conspiracy! It’s because you’re hateful dicks! How hateful is this ad? Well….

Cop-killing illegal immigrant Luis Bracamontes stars in a web video from January that President Trump tweeted Thursday. The expletive-laced courtroom footage shows a laughing Bracamontes admitting he killed two police officers and promising to break out of jail soon.

"Democrats let him into the country," the video says in all caps. As he says he wishes he had "killed more" cops, "Democrats let him stay" flashes over the screen. Neither the video nor the president cite any evidence to support the allegation that Democrats let him into the U.S. and let him stay.

Is the accusation accurate?

THE FACTS: No. This is akin to blaming Republicans for criminals who entered the country illegally under Presidents Trump or George W. Bush.

Bracamontes, who is from the Mexican state of Sinaloa, came to the U.S. illegally in June 1996, during Democrat Bill Clinton's administration. He was arrested three months later on drug charges after purchasing crack cocaine from an undercover officer at a Phoenix apartment. According to The Sacramento Bee, after he served his four-month term in then-Sheriff Joe Arpaio's tent city jail, he was handed off to immigration agents and deported in June 1997.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/new-trump-campaign-video-luis-bracamontes-ad-cop-killer-immigration-fact-check-trump-tweeted/

Gee… ya think? Oh and it gets better! Yes, there are people defending this horrid atrocity of an ad! And oh yeah it’s exactly the people who you would expect. People like RNC chairman Ronna McDaniel.

In an exchange with CNN's Jake Tapper on Sunday, the RNC chair defended President Trump's campaign ad, which suggested that Democrats were to blame for enabling an undocumented immigrant who was convicted for killing two California police officers back in 2014. The president first shared the ad to his Twitter account on Oct. 31.

In speaking with RNC chair Ronna Romney McDaniel, Tapper pointed out that the ad contained factual inaccuracies insofar as blaming Democrats for the murders. The undocumented immigrant in the video, Luis Bracamontes, was deported from the United States twice, according to The Washington Post. Those deportations were in 1997 and 2001 — under one Democratic president, and under one Republican president.

“It’s factually inaccurate and it’s racially incendiary,” Tapper said of the ad, according to Newsweek. “You don’t have any issue with that?”

McDaniel responded that she had "an issue with our immigration system that’s not being fixed. And the Democrats won’t work with the president and we have caravans coming."
https://www.bustle.com/p/the-rnc-chair-defended-trumps-campaign-ad-that-links-undocumented-migrants-to-violent-crime-13087726

Yeah obviously! Of course Dump himself had to go throw kerosene on the fire and blow it out of proportion like in Deadpool 2. And I love that Trump is saying “he told the truth”. Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha….

President Donald Trump addressed an incendiary campaign video for the first time Friday, defending his move to tweet the ad as "just telling the truth."
"They gave me a hard time because I put it up on Twitter and they gave a hard time," Trump told a crowd in Huntington, West Virginia. "They said, 'you shouldn't be doing that! That's not nice!'"
"And I say, all I'm doing is just telling the truth, what can I say," he added.
The video, tweeted by Trump on Wednesday afternoon, shows a Hispanic man bragging about killing police officers during a courtroom appearance and says Democrats want to allow more people like him into the country.

Commentators have called the ad racist and likened it to the Willie Horton ad in the 1988 campaign. That ad was backed by supporters of George H.W. Bush's presidential campaign. It depicted Democratic opponent Michael Dukakis as responsible for the rape Horton, a convicted murderer, committed while out of prison while furloughed under a Massachusetts program. The ad was seen as playing into white fear and racist stereotypes of African-Americans.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/02/politics/trump-reaction-racist-ad-wva-rally/index.html

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Foxconn WTF?
[br] [/font]
[br]

Hey Orlando, it’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

Last year, speaker of the house Paul Ryan and president Donald Trump made a deal with the state of Wisconsin to bring the extremely controversial electronics conglomerate Foxconn to Ryan’s home state of Wisconsin. The deal that Trump was touting was not exactly met with a warm welcome, and now things seem to be getting much worse. Apparently the deal has also been about as shady as you can expect, with things like this happening .

Maybe you remember the big show at the White House after Foxconn agreed to build a new manufacturing plant in Mt. Pleasant, Wisconsin. Trump was there to tout the deal as a victory in his “America First” crusade. Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker was there trying to win back some of his state’s respect after his 2016 presidential bid took a nose-dive.

And Foxconn founder Terry Gou was there to play on these desires, hoping to get a new American factory on the cheap. The state of Wisconsin agreed to hand over a $4.1 billion subsidy to Foxconn, which will cost Wisconsinites more than a million dollars per job created. And a nonpartisan study shows the state won’t see a return on this investment until 2042.

Now two news stories are emerging that show how one of Trump’s biggest “America First” triumphs is mostly benefitting Foxconn. Just one day before the country votes in numerous Congressional elections, a New Yorker piece shed some light on the shady tactics used by the Mt. Pleasant’s Village Board of Trustees to get the needed land.
https://www.fastcompany.com/90262695/foxconns-wisconsin-factory-is-shrouded-in-questionable-dealings

People generally associate Foxconn with Apple and all the horrors coming out of their Chinese factory in Shenzhen, and you rightfully should be horrified that they want to bring that here to the US. Especially when the deal made to bring Foxconn here was done with a dirty dealer.

It was a veritable lovefest in Milwaukee in July 2017 when Republican Gov. Scott Walker and Foxconn chairman Terry Gou announced their plan to create a heavily subsidized manufacturing plant in southeastern Wisconsin. Walker gushed that Gou, who founded his Taiwan-based company in 1974, was “one of the most remarkable business leaders in the world.” Gou returned the favor by saying, “I’ve never seen this type of governor or leader yet in this world.” Effusive, yet ambiguous.

The details of the deal were famously written on the back of a napkin when Gou and the Republican governor first met: a $3 billion state subsidy in return for Foxconn’s $10 billion investment in a Generation 10.5 LCD manufacturing plant that would create 13,000 jobs.

The size of the subsidy was stunning. It was far and away the largest in Wisconsin history and the largest government handout to a foreign company ever given in America. Like most states, Wisconsin had given subsidies to companies in the past, but never higher than $35,000 per job. Foxconn’s subsidy was $230,000 per job.
https://www.theverge.com/2018/10/29/18027032/foxconn-wisconsin-plant-jobs-deal-subsidy-governor-scott-walker

Don’t worry, we won’t. But if you work for Foxconn you should realize that if you do the math, those jobs really don’t pay that much and they won’t really make a dent in Foxconn’s profits. Really, that’s what happens when you deal with a dirty dealer. But here’s where it could quite possibly get ugly – not that it hasn’t happened already.

Foxconn Technology Group is considering bringing in personnel from China to help staff a large facility under construction in southern Wisconsin as it struggles to find engineers and other workers in one of the tightest labor markets in the U.S.

The company 2354, +0.15% , the Taiwanese supplier to Apple Inc. AAPL, +0.11% , has been trying to tap Chinese engineers through internal transfers to supplement staffing for the Wisconsin plant, according to people familiar with the matter.

The state pledged $3 billion in tax and other “performance-based” incentives to help lure Foxconn, and local authorities added $764 million. Foxconn must meet hiring, wage and investment targets by various dates to receive most of those benefits.

The company promised the state it would invest $10 billion and build a 22-million-square-foot liquid-crystal display panel plant, hiring 13,000 employees, primarily factory workers along with some engineers and business support positions.
https://www.marketwatch.com/story/foxconn-mulls-tapping-chinese-skilled-workers-for-wisconsin-plant-as-us-job-market-tightens-2018-11-06

So… $10 billion to build an LCD manufacturing facility for 13,000 employees, if you do the math, is barely a fraction of the cost of building this thing. And they might not even hire American workers. That makes both Foxconn and Trump dirty dealers. So are they or are they not hiring workers from out of the United States?

Foxconn has received roughly $4 billion in subsidies set aside by Wisconsin to build a new plant in the state, but that deal is looking worse and worse with each passing day. According to the Wall Street Journal, Foxconn is looking into transferring workers from China to staff up its plant because the company has struggled to hire enough workers in America. But Foxconn is emphatically denying the report and insists it will find enough workers in the U.S.

“We can categorically state that the assertion that we are recruiting Chinese personnel to staff our Wisconsin project is untrue,” Foxconn Technology Group told Gizmodo over email. “Our recruitment priority remains Wisconsin first and we continue to focus on hiring and training workers from throughout Wisconsin. We will supplement that recruitment from other US locations as required.”

But according to the Wall Street Journal, finding skilled labor in the U.S. is difficult today given the country’s low unemployment numbers. And it’s particularly low in Wisconsin right now, where the unemployment rate sits at just 3 percent, with the nation’s at an incredibly low 3.7 percent.
https://gizmodo.com/foxconn-denies-report-that-it-will-bring-workers-from-c-1830250003

Of course they did! They won’t flat out admit that they are going to hire Chinese workers over American or they’d risk the deal entirely. And it doesn’t take the guy who wrote “The Art Of The Deal” to tell you how bad this idea is, is it? Well…

Last month, at a rally in Mosinee, Wisconsin, Donald Trump introduced Governor Scott Walker to the stage with a boast regarding a dubious, shared accomplishment. “I got him set up with an incredible company called Foxconn,” Trump told the crowd, referring to the Taiwanese electronics manufacturing giant that had agreed to build its first U.S. plant in the Badger State. “[Foxconn] came to Wisconsin with the most incredible plan . . . It’s the most incredible thing I’ve ever seen. We toured it, and we had a ribbon-cutting a few months ago. And I handed it over to Scott . . . there’s no plant like it anywhere in the United States. One of the most incredible things I’ve ever seen. One of the most incredible things.”

And it’s true! There is nothing like the literally incredible Foxconn deal in the United States, because the Foxconn deal—brokered by First Son-in-Law Jared Kushner—has turned out to be less of a jobs boon than an economic nuclear bomb, and not the good kind, either. To put it more elegantly, the Foxconn deal is the ultimate example of Trump promising Americans the world and then handing them a flaming bag of s--t.
https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2018/11/donald-trump-foxconn-scam

That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
[br] [/font] [br]

Gather around, my fair brothers and sisters of Orlando, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate! For the Holy Church of the Top 10 has convened and it’s our weekly duty to remind you why the holiest among us are also the most full of:

So my fair congregation, who did GAWD vote for in this election? Yeah I’m discussing politics in my church, got a problem with that? Because they don’t care either, so why should we? See, I’ve pointed out how supporters of the Dark One, whose name shall not be named in my church, are coming hard after the Johnson Amendment so they can preach hard right politics and not get caught. Well, I got news for ya – that shit will work both ways. See, supporters of the Dark One don’t get that the constitution of the United States applies to everybody, not just them, and they are always shocked when they find out how that works. So which side of the coin did GAWD and JAYSUS vote for? It might shock you, but not really.

Yes, apparently if you vote against the Dark One, you are voting for the torture and murder of children, except those things didn’t happen, Liz! But apparently the people who are about to stop that sort of thing are also the people more likely to be DAYMONS!!!! And AYVIL!!!! And LUCIFER!!! Except, well, not really.

Last week, My Faith Votes, a Religious Right voter mobilization effort, featured an interview with Phil Robertson in which the former “Duck Dynasty” star urged Christians to vote Republican in the upcoming midterm elections because, he says, the Democrats are evil and depraved God-haters.

“This particular election, this cycle, this is the most important one I’ve seen since I’ve been on the earth,” Robertson said. “Say what you will about Mr. Donald J. Trump, but I have no argument or no negative things to say about his policies. I think he’s been a wonderful president, so far.”

“I just think we ought to look at both groups,” Robertson recommended, citing a passage from the book of Romans. “Since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gives them over to a reprobate mind. They’re full of wickedness, evil, greed, and depravity. They’re God-haters, slanders, gossips. They’re insolent, arrogant, boastful, senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless.”

“Just look at both groups and say, ‘Are the Republicans more godly than the other party?'” he concluded. “I’ve looked at it and I said, ‘There’s no doubt about it.’ They’re at least not anti-God, so I would say everyone go out and vote. I would recommend Republican all the way. They’re a lot better than the other side.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/duck-dynasty-patriarchs-gotv-message-democrats-are-evil-and-depraved-god-haters/

And that is a good question, JAYSUS! And I especially ask that question in the era of the rule of the Dark One.

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse
[br] [/font] [br]

Hey everybody! It’s time for another edition of:

If there’s one thing conservatives love it’s a good boogeyman. Last week we talked about how they have beaten to death the false flag conspiracy. This week, we’re going to talk about their other favorite boogeyman – 90 year old Jewish holocaust survivor philanthropist billionaire George Soros. Think of him as the conservative conspiracy theorist equivalent of Kevin Bacon. They can literally tie him to just about anything. Let’s see, there’s a migrant caravan at the Mexico – Guatemalan border that is making its’ way to the US to seek asylum and a new way of life. I know! They must be getting their funding from George Soros! Democrats are winning elections? It must be George Soros’ fault! Hey, McDonalds didn’t have any chicken nuggets! Oh no, it’s because George Soros is cutting off chicken supplies! That didn’t even take one degree did it? Because it’s all his fault, damn it! Here’s more.

Hours after he was informed last week that an explosive device had been delivered to his suburban New York home, George Soros, the billionaire investor and Democratic donor, got on a call with colleagues to discuss yet another threat: the authoritarian Hungarian government’s crackdown on a university he had founded.

The attempted attack in New York — subsequently determined to have been part of a wave of pipe bombs targeting prominent critics of President Trump — did not come up. But it was no coincidence that Mr. Soros would be facing intense opposition and threats at the same moment in two countries thousands of miles apart.

On both sides of the Atlantic, a loose network of activists and political figures on the right have spent years seeking to cast Mr. Soros not just as a well-heeled political opponent but also as the personification of all they detest. Employing barely coded anti-Semitism, they have built a warped portrayal of him as the mastermind of a “globalist” movement, a left-wing radical who would undermine the established order and a proponent of diluting the white, Christian nature of their societies through immigration.

In the process, they have pushed their version of Mr. Soros, 88, from the dark corners of the internet and talk radio to the very center of the political debate.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/31/us/politics/george-soros-bombs-trump.html

Yeah probably! So how did Mr. Soros get to be conservative public enemy number one? Well, like all extremely horrible things, see if you can take a guess as to where these conspiracy theories first originated from? If you guessed that they originated from Russia, you guessed correctly!

It was in Russia that the orchestrated anti-Soros campaign first surfaced, where his foundations first suffered expulsion. Soros used his fortune to save pro-Western anti-Kremlin civil society across the Eastern Bloc from Tbilisi to the Baltic. For which, naturally, the Kremlin owed him massive payback. But here's the rub: Soros's mission never aimed at weakening national identities, rather the reverse. His foundations encouraged national figures to reconsolidate cultural memory before and after Russian domination. Remember that Sovietism was the first globalist, 'internationalist', movement. Soros opposed its lingering epiphenomena. What he does support is a strong Europe, the penetration of European values into the former Iron Curtain countries - which also incites the Kremlin's hostility.

If you look closely at how Kremlin disinformation works, you'll notice a recurring theme. Attack your enemy's strong points. Invert them, use them against him through nebulous smear-campaigns. And, sadly, their methods have bled over into American discourse via the extreme right. Hence the Jewish Soros is a hidden Nazi. The Soros that helped salvage Eastern European cultures and customs presents a threat to the same. The Soros whose foundations pushed transparency and anti-corruption everywhere (thus thwarting the Kremlin) gets smeared as a sinister ubiquitous operator, shadowy puppetmaster sans frontier. There's an added vileness implicit here in that the archetype being invoked carries more than a whiff of the Nazi stereotype of Jewry. Preposterously, also, the anti-Western nationalism now burgeoning from the Kremlin southwards paints Soros as the arrowhead of nefarious American power, while America Firsters reject him.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/melikkaylan/2018/03/01/why-populists-hate-george-soros-and-how-it-started/#21421cee13d0

Yeah probably. But if you want to look at conservative misinformation at its’ finest, look no further than just about any conspiracy theory involving Soros. I mean if you want to see a conservative talking point grow and multiply and have wings, this is the perfect story for that. It really shows how the conservative disinformation machine at work, look at the migrant story I mentioned earlier.

This is the life of a lie.

Three weeks ago, a caravan of Hondurans began walking nearly 2,000 miles to the United States. Their ranks grew as they inched north and, along with them, falsehoods grew, too. But one stands out: a conspiracy theory that liberal billionaire George Soros, a Jewish immigrant, is paying the migrants to make the journey – or even orchestrating it.

Members of Congress and the president’s son both repeated it. Conservative celebrities, too.

It also may have resonated in darker places. Cesar Sayoc, the man charged with mailing pipe bombs to Soros and other prominent critics of President Donald Trump, dwelled at length online about conspiracy theories involving the Hungarian-American philanthropist. Robert Bowers, charged with killing 11 people worshiping in a Pittsburgh synagogue on Saturday, used his social media accounts to post extensively about the caravan, including circulating an image of refugees in Guatemala purportedly climbing into a truck with a Star of David on the side.

But it began with a handful of posts in the caravan’s early days.

<snip>

The Soros theory was not new – it had made the rounds during previous caravans in the spring and again in August. In fact, one Facebook user posting in October provided as evidence a video of Glenn Beck discussing the spring caravan’s alleged connections to Soros.
https://www.wgrz.com/article/news/nation-now/how-a-lie-about-george-soros-and-the-migrant-caravan-multiplied-online/465-7559e63d-9f03-4ed9-bfbb-efebbb959317

And by the way if you’re wondering where this is leading – there’s more of a conspiracy against Soros than you might realize. In fact Fox News recently rejected a request from a Soros aide to come on one of their programs and got denied. Dude, it’s Fox News, what did you expect?

Fox News talks about billionaire philanthropist George Soros a lot. He is a favorite bogeyman of the right, so Fox's conservative talk shows blame him for all sorts of ills, sometimes even pushing into conspiracy theory territory.

But the head of Soros's philanthropic group said the conservative network won't let him on air to rebut the wild accusations.

Patrick Gaspard, president of Soros's Open Society Foundations, told CNN's Brian Stelter on "Reliable Sources" Sunday that Fox News producers "refuse to have us on."
Fox News did not respond to CNN Business' request for comment about Gaspard's claim.

Conspiracy theories about Soros have spread for years among the far right.
President Donald Trump and his supporters have circulated accusations that Soros, who is Jewish, is assisting a caravan of migrants bound for the United States, which the foundation denies.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/04/media/george-soros-patrick-gaspard-fox-news/index.html

[font size="8"]WWE
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time once again to ask:

This week – the WWE’s Crown Jewel. How is this still a thing? So the WWE has been expanding into a new audience and it has tapped, for reasons still unclear, Saudi Arabia. Yes, the country where women can be killed for driving and gay people jailed for simply existing, somehow allows sweaty, homo erotic rasslin’ in its’ borders. A lot of it has to do with this man – Saudi Prince Mohammed Bin Salome, who looks like a WWE wrestler.

Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman is one of the most powerful men in the Middle East. Some say he's a progressive reformer; others see him as a brutal hardliner who silences his opponents.

The crown prince's rapid rise to power has opened doors for him to meet with some of the world's most prominent political and business leaders.

But now, the world's attention is directed squarely at the crown prince, known as MBS, and his inner circle for their alleged involvement in the presumed death of Saudi journalist Jamal Khashoggi. Khashoggi, a columnist for The Washington Post and a critic of the Saudi government, disappeared after entering the Saudi consulate in Istanbul, Turkey, on Oct. 2.
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/10/18/meet-saudi-arabias-crown-prince-mohammed-bin-salman.html

Yes, despite the constant cries to not go into a Saudi Arabian market, the WWE continues to do it anyways. Why? Because they don’t care, and that’s why. So why are they doing this? Why are they continuing to go through such a controversial market? Well here’s more.

In the aftermath of the assassination of Jamal Khashoggi inside Saudi Arabia’s consulate in Istanbul, the reaction in the business community was swift: Several American businesses received pressure to stop doing business with the kingdom, and many pulled out of the country, at least for the time being. But others have stuck with Saudi Arabia, including the one whose enmeshment with the royal family has probably received the most attention in recent weeks: World Wrestling Entertainment, the largest purveyor of professional wrestling on the planet.

This Friday, exactly one month after Khashoggi was killed, WWE will produce their second show in a partnership with the Saudis, WWE Crown Jewel in Riyadh. The first show, April’s Greatest Royal Rumble in Jeddah, is basically Exhibit A for the backlash against WWE: The event was almost entirely a lengthy propaganda infomercial for the kingdom, pushing local tourism, the claimed social progress of the country under Crown Prince Mohammad Bin Salman, and hostility towards Iran.

WWE is on the verge of bringing in significantly higher profits than ever before when they start their new domestic TV contracts next year, so the Saudi deal wasn’t an existential necessity for the company. So while it’s fairly simple to understand why WWE made a deal with Saudi Arabia—since they were far from the only ones to do so—it’s a little more complicated to understand why the WWE brass would agree to this deal, and all of the geopolitical ramifications that come along with it.
https://www.thenation.com/article/wwe-saudi-arabia-wrestling-propaganda/

So it’s more about the quest for profit than it is about the quest for human rights. What country in the world doesn’t want to see sweaty muscular men pounding each other into submission? After all, we’re only a few elections away from Rage In The Cage style grudge matches in Congress.

There's a term that is often used to justify difficult or morally questionable decisions in the face of large economic gain. One can hear it anywhere from a corporate setting to the famous scene involving organized crime in the 1972 film "The Godfather."

"It's not personal; it's strictly business."

Historically, the world of combat sports promotion hasn't been any different.

When the UFC rewarded Jon Jones and Brock Lesnar with immediate title shots fresh off of failed drug tests and suspensions? It's strictly business.

When the state of Nevada allowed Floyd Mayweather to delay his impending 2012 jail sentence for felony domestic assault by one month in order for the city of Las Vegas to reap the financial benefits of his pay-per-view bout against Miguel Cotto? Again, it's just business.

WWE, which often straddles the line between combat sports and a scripted television drama thanks to its hybrid "sports entertainment" product, is no different. The worldwide pro wrestling leader has been steadily criticized of late for decisions linked to a 10-year "strategic multi-platform partnership" it signed with Saudi Arabia in February that left the company looking anywhere from tone deaf to transparently greedy.
https://www.cbssports.com/wwe/news/by-choosing-to-stay-quiet-on-saudi-arabia-wwe-speaks-volumes-about-its-true-intentions/

When you think about this as a human rights matter, just remember that that guy is our president, and that Vince McMahon is a huge Trump supporter. Remember the infamous orb?

Maybe that’s what the orb was prophesizing – a relationship between the US and Saudi Arabia brought together through body slamming. Because that’s what the whole world wants, apparently. But even in the Trump era, actions do have consequences, as their continued relationship with Saudi Arabia could put the company’s PPV hopes in jeopardy.

World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) is on the verge of being drawn into the rising political and diplomatic tensions with Saudi Arabia, putting its multimillion-dollar deal for live events in jeopardy.

The Arab state is currently embroiled in an international crisis over the disappearance of Saudi national and United States resident Jamal Khashoggi.

A journalist for the Washington Post, Khashoggi was last seen entering the Saudi consulate in Istanbul last week. Turkish authorities have claimed he was murdered by Saudi agents, while Riyadh has denied killing Khashoggi and the kingdom have insisted he left the consulate shortly after he arrived.

WWE is due to return to Saudi Arabia on November 2 for its "Crown Jewel" night of wrestling, but now it is unclear if the event at the King Saud University Stadium in Riyadh will go ahead.
https://www.cnbc.com/2018/10/12/multi-million-dollar-wwe-pay-per-view-deal-in-jeopardy-due-to-saudi-arabia-tensions.html

Yeah so Saudi Arabia could keep the WWE and they will subject themselves to things like that. That’s enough to make you ask – the WWE’s Crown Jewel:

[font size="8"]Ah, It’s Not So Bad
[br] [/font] [br]

So you will notice this week we’re doing neither People Are Dumb nor are we doing I Need A Drink. Ah, don’t be sad! It’s time for our new segment:

So here’s how this is going to work, I’m going to post a few news stories and it doesn’t matter what they are or where they are going and we are going to find the silver lining in all of them. Where do we start this segment? OK remember batshit crazy Minnesota politician Michelle Bachmann? Yes she’s back in the news because, reasons. And well, her latest reason is so fucking crazy that it is truly beyond description.

Former Minnesota congresswoman and current Religious Right “pastor to the United Nations” Michele Bachmann appeared on Jan Markell’s “Understanding The Times” radio program yesterday, where she blamed the outbreak of a polio-like virus in the United States on undocumented immigrants.

Dozens of children in several states have been diagnosed this year with acute flaccid myelitis, a virus that can leave children with muscle weakness or paralysis, and Bachmann declared that it is happening “because literally millions of people are coming into the United State illegally.” For good measure, she also predicted that members of the Central American caravan that is heading toward the United States may stage an incident involving injured or dead children in order to generate sympathy by demonizing President Trump and the Republicans.

“I think, just like in Europe, when that little 3-year-old boy tragically washed up on the shores, he was used as an icon to allow millions of migrants into Europe,” Bachmann said. “I believe that we should be prepared that some tragic incident could occur—it could very well be staged—and they’ll use that to try to hang it around President Trump’s neck and around the neck of the Republicans to say, ‘Look how cruel these people are, we’ve got to open our doors to these people.’ I think that could be very well be what they mean to do.”

“Today, we’re dealing with this issue of the strange polio virus that’s impacting little children,” she added. “We have all of these strange diseases that were cured in the United States and they’re here. Why? Because literally millions of people are coming into the United State illegally, they aren’t vetted, they’re aren’t checked. The American people are paying the price for that lawlessness.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/michele-bachmann-blames-undocumented-immigrants-for-polio-like-virus-outbreak/

Ah it’s not so bad, at least it will deflect blame from anti vaccination crusaders when a real polio like vaccine shows up! Yeah let’s blow off getting vaccines for polio, what could possibly go wrong? A polio like super virus will show up! Next up travelers from Orlando – hey that’s the city we’re in! - to London on British Airways had to endure a grueling 77 hour flight because of mechanical failures and weather problems.

What should have been an eight-hour flight from Orlando to London on British Airways turned into a three-day travel nightmare for 250 passengers last week.

Flight 2036 was scheduled to take off from Orlando International Airport on Thursday evening to Gatwick Airport but was grounded until Friday because of mechanical issues, the airline said.

When it finally got off the ground Friday evening, it was soon diverted to John F. Kennedy International Airport early Saturday morning in New York “as a precaution” because of a minor technical issue, airline spokeswoman Michele Kropf said Monday in an email.

“We appreciate that this was an exhausting and frustrating experience for our customers, and we have apologized for the long delay to their flight,” Kropf said.

The airline sent a relief aircraft to JFK Airport, and the weary passengers eventually made it to London on Sunday.
https://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/transportation/os-ne-british-airways-flight-orlando-london-20181105-story.html

Ah it’s not so bad, where else can you watch such quality flicks as Billionaire Boys Club, Gotti, and Death Of A Nation? Oh wait, that would make me hate travel even more! Well speaking of hating travel, you’re going to be doing a lot more driving if you happen to live near a Lowe’s home improvement store! Since they’re getting ready to close a whole bunch of stores.

In another sign of the times for retail, Lowe's is closing 51 North American stores.
Lowe's said Monday that those locations are underperforming and the decision will help the hardware chain focus on its most profitable stores.

"The store closures are a necessary step in our strategic reassessment as we focus on building a stronger business," said CEO Marvin Ellison, in a statement.

Retail stores are struggling to adjust to the rapid rise of online shopping, particularly from Amazon (AMZN). Many successful retailers with big stores have adjusted their business strategies to make better use of their physical spaces. Others, including Sears, Kmart and Toys "R" Us, failed.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/11/05/business/lowes-closures/index.html

Ah it’s not so bad, think of it this way – we’re one step closer to having a giant Costco the size of the state of Kansas. Hey does that mean we can get handys at Starbucks? Oh come on, you know I’m asking for a friend! Finally, this week, if you’ve ever seen the show “Better Call Saul”, you might be familiar with actor Todd Latourette. But if you’re not, you will definitely know him after seeing this story!

A New Mexico-based actor who has appeared in AMC's "Better Call Saul," the western TV drama "Longmire" and the 2009 movie "The Men Who Stare at Goats" says he cut off his own arm and pretended to be a wounded veteran in hopes of furthering his acting career.

In a video interview with Albuquerque's KOB-4 TV, Todd Lawson Latourette, who is bipolar, said he was off his medications and in the midst of a psychotic episode 17 years ago when he cut off his right forearm with a Skilsaw and cauterized it himself.

"I don't want to say the word 'insanity' because the mentally ill – we're so far from insane," he said tearfully of his mental state at the time. "We are your brothers, your mothers, your sisters. And we hurt."

Latourette later fashioned his own prosthetic forearm and hand. He also began lying about the cause of his disability, saying he sustained the wound in combat. It worked, he insisted. Casting directors started booking him for roles.
https://amp.usatoday.com/amp/1844593002

Ah, it’s not so bad! Think of it this way – if they ever reboot “The Fugitive”, they know who to call to play the one armed man! And that is it this week for:

[font size="8"]Deep State Diaries Episode 19: The Department Of Defense
[br] [/font] [br]

It’s time for episode 19 of Deep State Diaries. Yes we’re touring the 24 branches and services that make up the United States government. Everything from the FBI to the IRS to the Pentagon to the CIA to the DPW to the DVA to parks and recreation and all branches and services in between. Of course if you’re here you probably already know more about our government and how it works than your average Fox News loving Trump supporter does. So that’s what this segment is going to address. We are going to do a deep dive into all that makes the United States the United States. Because we here at the Top 10 love to educate as well as entertain. Because we care.

[font size="6"]The Department Of Defense[/font]

So this week there has been much talk of Trump sending a whopping 5,200 troops to the US – Mexico border to defend the US against a migrant caravan heading through Mexico seeking legal asylum in the US, because, reasons. And there’s one department that could either stop him or continue to aid his insane quest for domination. And that department is the Department Of Defense, the entity that’s in charge of the US military. They oversee things like troop deployment. How does this factor into Trump’s insane quest? Well here’s more.

Russia and China are near-peer competitors and the United States must benchmark military capabilities against these possible threats, Marine Corps Gen. Joe Dunford said at Duke University here last night.

The chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff told a standing room only audience that the two-plus-three strategy gives civilian and military leaders the framework they need to prioritize personnel and resources.

The rise of China and Russia represent the return of great power competition and the American military must respond to this challenge. But the United States still is concerned about North Korea, Iran and violent extremism, he said.

This does not limit officials, he said. The best guess is that these threats are most likely, but there could be other threats that rise and must be addressed.
https://dod.defense.gov/News/Article/Article/1683762/us-benchmarking-capabilities-against-china-russia-dunford-says/

Yeah let’s just hope that guy isn’t in charge at the DOD. Although the DOD is actively at work defending this country from threats, let’s say that their cyber department needs a massive upgrade. Cyber security is definitely nothing to joke about, especially when this happens.

The data was accessed via a system that maintained travel records. That system was not operated by the Department itself but an unnamed third party contractor.

Spokesperson Lt. Col. Joseph Buccino downplayed the incident saying that only "a very small percentage of the total population" of employees were impacted.

The DoD is a massive organization, however. It's the nation's largest employer with 1.3 million enlisted men and women and another 742,000 civilian employees. The "small percentage" in this case equates to at least 30,000 Americans.

The exact number is not yet known. An anonymous source who spoke to the Associated Press said that the investigation is ongoing and the final figure could climb significantly.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/leemathews/2018/10/14/department-of-defense-data-breach-exposes-30000-employees/#5325a0f41a6b

Ah, I love Zapp Branagin. But really, let’s hope that he’s not in charge. I can’t stress that enough! So how is the DOD fighting back against data breaches? Well they’re encouraging people to hack them. Sure, get a bunch of hackers in a room and they’ll eventually hack NORAD, right? I mean what’s the worst that could happen?

The Department of Defense is expanding its "Hack the Pentagon" program by awarding contracts to Silicon Valley firms BugCrowd, HackerOne, and Synack to run ongoing bug bounty contests in search of vulnerabilities.

First launched as a pilot program in 2016 under Secretary Ash Carter, Hack the Pentagon allowed outside cybersecurity professionals to legally attempt to break into its public-facing systems — something that the DoD's enemies are trying to do pretty much every day. The trial run was a success, which led to thousands of security vulnerabilities being identified and remedied, according to a DoD press release.

"Finding innovative ways to identify vulnerabilities and strengthen security has never been more important," Chris Lynch, Director of the Defense Digital Service, said in a statement.

"When our adversaries carry out malicious attacks, they don't hold back and aren't afraid to be creative. Expanding our crowdsourced security work allows us to build a deeper bench of tech talent and bring more diverse perspectives to protect and defend our assets. We're excited to see the program continue to grow and deliver value across the department."
https://www.businessinsider.com/department-defense-wants-people-hack-pentagon-2018-10

Hey maybe Zapp Brannagin is in charge! But he’s definitely not the person who we need sending to the border to defend our country from… migrants fleeing violence because, reasons. Yeah the last thing we need is for Fox News to order Trump to fire on them. But we’ll save that for another edition.

At least 5,200 troops will be deployed to the U.S. border with Mexico by the end of the week, Department of Homeland Security and Department of Defense officials confirmed Monday afternoon.

The troops are in addition to the 2,000 National Guard members who have been in place since April. They are being sent days before the midterm elections in response to the caravan of Central American migrants that are slowly making their way to the United States after crossing Mexico's southern border earlier this month.

“Make no mistakes, as we sit right here today, we have 800 soldiers that are on their way to Texas right now,” said Air Force Gen. Terrence O'Shaughnessy, the chief of U.S. Northern Command, during a news conference.

O’Shaughnessy said that new number could change, depending on whether the situation dictates a change in strategy. O’Shaughnessy foretold of an operation that is likely to be very different from the current National Guard activity, which mainly happens behind the scenes and assists federal Customs and Border Protection and Border Patrol agents.
https://www.texastribune.org/2018/10/29/department-defense-says-its-sending-5200-troops-us-mexico-border/

[font size="6"]Score Card [/font]

Overall importance: A
How Things Are Going: B
Likely hood To Survive: B+

Overall: A-

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

Next week we’re going to the airports as we explore how our air traffic gets monitored as we visit the FAA!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Tenacious D[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen I am extremely excited to have this next guest on, you know them better as Jack Black and Kyle Gass, their latest album is called “Post Apocalypto”, you can see them on tour and at the Hollywood Palladium on 12/21! Playing their song called “Colors”, give it up for the one, the only Tenacious D!

Thank you Orlando! This was a great destination to have my post-election edition! We are off to Denver next!! See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Orlando Improv, Orlando, FL
Special Thanks To: Improv Group
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: University of Florida Choir Club, Gainesville, FL
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
Tenacious D Appears Courtesy Of: Columbia Records
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: [email protected]

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

November 3, 2018

Preview For This Week's Top 10 Conservative Idiots

I'm not sure who the bigger buffoon is - Jacob Wohl and Surefire Intelligence or Alex Jones?

https://twitter.com/RightWingWatch/status/1058442443677450241

No, it's definitely Alex Jones. At least it's a step up from yelling at a pile of poop! But really not that big of a step.

*audience laughs and applauds*

This week the Top 10 is live from Orlando! We delve into the election results - will we be popping the champagne or drowning our sorrows in Jack Daniels? Tune in to find out! Also, we delve into the colossal fail that is the Surefire Intelligence scandal, Trump attempts to gut the constitution (again), we ask how the WWE's Saudi Arabian audience is still a thing, and "Beating A Dead Horse" explores Soros Derangement Syndrome. Plus in our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates, we're going to delve into what's going on with that migrant caravan that Trump is so obsessed with? The answer might shock you! And in our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in "Holy Shit", our resident pastor is going to tell you the Christian right's reaction to the election and post some choice quotes. And we're going to debut a new segment - "Ah, It's Not So Bad" in which we attempt to find the silver lining in a bunch of random news items and whether or not they are good or bad. And the next installment of Deep State Diaries is going to delve into the Department Of Defense! All this plus the legendary Tenacious D is going to be stopping by!

Top 10 Conservative Idiots: Wednesdays at 2:00 PM /shameless self promotion

October 31, 2018

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-18: Wheel Of Corruption & The Deathly Hallows Pt 1 Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #5-18: Wheel Of Corruption & The Deathly Hallows Pt 1 Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! You don’t have to review our privacy policy here because we don’t have one! What’s up Smashville??? Yeah there I said it, oh, and happy fucking Halloween! Whew, after the events of last week, we made it! By the way, I must explain my costume today. See, I am not Donald Trump. Instead, I took my own advice from last week and went out and got the much jankier “Costume Candidate” costume. See how fake my wig is? And my comically oversized tie? It perfectly accentuates my girth! Oh my hat says “Make America Good Always”. Yes, it’s finally Halloween and time for my big Halloween show! So do I really need to congratulate the Red Sox for winning the World Series? No? Good! Because the international symbol of choking should be changed from this – to this. Yeah sorry Dodger fans but it’s true. This is only Boston’s 180th championship in the last 15 years. They win so much I’m sick of it! Do we have time for the thing? So… yeah Post Malone, what are you doing? Our good friend Post Malone is back in the news and I don’t know if you saw this or not but Post has been in the news for spending like a baller! And it’s mainly on the site Postmates. See? Post? Postmates? Get it? Ah! Ah! OK so what did he buy exactly? Just about anything and everything. Tons of booze, tons of fast food. Dude, Post why are you so tired all the time? I don’t know – maybe eat a salad or two instead of $900 worth of Popeye’s chicken. Or maybe drink some water and coffee instead of $4,000 worth of booze. But here’s where it gets weird – he asked Postmates to go to Target and buy the most expensive chess set. Although my favorite thing is that he asked Postmates to bring him… a mariachi band! Yeah you really can’t make this stuff up, though we really question Post’s spending habits at this point. OK enough of the intro. We got a lot of idiocy to get to but first Bill Maher is back and he asks – did we reach Peak Florida?

So where do we begin this week? Well I’ve been teasing this segment for a while now but we got to do it – “What’s Up With Brazil?” because Brazil just elected an ultra far right Trump / Putin stooge as their new president and we’ll tell you all about what you can expect from Jair Bolsonaro (1). In the second slot, unless you’ve been living under a rock we had a terrorist attack from a far right crazy man last week, and we’ll tell you all about the #MAGABomber (2). In the third slot is of course the guy who we currently call president and that’s Donald J. Trump (3). Did you know that China and Russia have been secretly listening in on Trump’s calls that he makes on his unsecured iPhone? I can guarantee that I am not in any way, shape or form shocked at these events. At number 4 this week we’ve got a new installment of “How Is This Still A Thing” and after Megyn Kelly’s revelation about Blackface, we’re going to ask “Blackface – how is this still a thing?”. For the 5th slot this week is of course our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates (5) and this week it’s a week before the midterm election and we’re going to talk voter intimidation. It’s an extremely scary subject. At number 6 is our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” (6) and this week our resident pastor is going to tell you, by way of the Christian right – who is god voting for? The answer may (not) surprise you! At number 7 we’ve got a new segment of one of our favorites – “Beating A Dead Horse”. After every attack and shooting, the right and alt right are lightning quick to call these shootings “false flag operations” and they’ve used the term so much that it’s lost all meaning. Taking the 8th slot this week we’ve got a new installment of “This Fucking Guy” and this week we’re going to profile the cohost and co-conspirator of Infowars, Pastor Rodney Howard Brown. Yes, this guy is a pastor! At number 9 (NEIN!!!!) this week is of course our favorite segment, People Are Dumb (9) ,because people are dumb. Finally this week we’ve got the next installment of Deep State Diaries and we’re going to check out how our elections are monitored as we visit the Federal Elections Commission. Yes, we need this one! Plus, for our big Halloween bash, the guy who is synonymous with Halloween – Marilyn Manson is going to be stopping by! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Jair Bolsonaro
[br] [/font] [br]

Hey everyone say it with me: It’s time for the WHEEL OF CORRUPTION! YAY!!!!!

Really, Jim Bakker’s channel is really just the Home Shopping Network for douchebags. Spin it again! And it lands on… wait for it… elections! And with that it’s time for our new segment:

So what is up with Brazil? You know we did our exhaustive World Tour back in the 3rd season of the Top 10 and we visited Brazil back in Idiots #3-13 and noted how Putin’s far right influence was rearing its’ ugly head in South America’s largest country. Well, last week, Putin scored another victory as Brazil elected a guy who’s essentially a tropical version of Trump.

Brazilian politics lurched to the far right Sunday after congressman Jair Bolsonaro won the presidency of Latin America’s largest nation. Bolsonaro, 63, is a former army captain who has appalled critics and thrilled supporters over his views on abortion, the environment, immigration, race, women and more.

He won 55.2% of votes cast with a promise to restore law and order and prioritize family values. Conservative Michel Temer has led Brazil for the last two years. His relatively brief tenure follows the impeachment of left wing President Dilma Rousseff.

Bolsonaro is a pro-gun, pro-torture, small-government politician who said he is "in favor of dictatorship." He has been charged with hate speech by Brazil's attorney general and was stabbed and nearly died while campaigning for the presidency.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2018/10/29/jair-bolsonaro-brazils-new-president-has-said-many-offensive-things/1804519002/

We can only guess that’s an actual artist rendering from Putin’s reaction watching the Brazilian elections. So guess what? Not even 24 hours in and Bolsonaro is met with some huge protests, hey it’s the Trump election all over again!

Tens of thousands of women have taken to the streets of Brazil to protest against the far-right presidential election front-runner Jair Bolsonaro.

The words Ele Nao (not him) were seen on stickers and banners and were shouted by the crowds.

Mr Bolsonaro was stabbed at a rally earlier this month and is currently leading in the polls ahead of the first round of elections on 7 October.

But a run-off vote is likely to be much closer.

A former army captain, Jair Bolsonaro is a hugely controversial figure and has sparked outrage with homophobic and misogynist comments.

He once told a congresswoman she was not worth raping and has equated homosexuality with paedophilia.

Some have compared the 63-year-old to Donald Trump. He enjoys the backing of millions of evangelical Christians who praise his anti-abortion stance
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-latin-america-45696677

Holy shit! He couldn’t be more like Trump if he were cloned! In case you’re wondering where Bolsonaro stands on the issues, well, guess what? Once again he’s just like Trump. Let’s delve into more.

Lots of the international media coverage of the rise of Jair Bolsonaro has lazily branded him Brazil’s answer to Donald Trump. But the truth is Bolsonaro, who swept to election victory Sunday night, is much more extreme. The far-right has conquered the world’s fourth biggest democracy, and the consequences of that will stretch far beyond Brazil.

During a bitter election campaign between Bolsonaro and Fernando Haddad of the left-wing Workers’ Party, each candidate claimed that the other would destroy Brazil. On Sunday, Bolsonaro’s vision—of eradicating corruption, driving down crime, and promoting traditional family values—led him to victory, with 55.2 percent of counted votes to 44.8.

One fair comparison with Trump’s victory is, this morning, that one half of the country will be elated and the other devastated. During Bolsonaro’s 27-year career as a congressman, the far-right politician has been known for celebrating the brutal military dictatorship that ruled Brazil for two decades and for repeatedly attacking the country’s black, gay and indigenous communities. He will now be their president.

In the past, he’s told a female representative in congress that she was too ugly for him to rape, and he’s publicly admitted that he’d rather have his son die in a car crash than be gay. He’s backed torture; said he’d have to kill 30,000 people to get the country back on track; and claimed having a daughter was a personal “moment of weakness.”
https://www.thedailybeast.com/why-the-hell-has-brazil-elected-far-right-jair-bolsonaro-as-president

I’d tell him where I would like to stick those thumbs. But really you should be very concerned with the direction that Brazil is heading in as they have joined the ranks of Turkey, the Philippines, China, Japan, in that far right populism and fear and economic anxiety is defeating progress. Yes, we are in for some dark times ahead.

The election of neo-fascist presidential candidate Jair Bolsonaro is raising fears that Brazil could be the latest country hit by a wave of far-right authoritarians. Bolsonaro, though, represents something scarier than Donald Trump, the politician he is most often compared to. Following the election on Oct. 28, the world’s fourth-largest democracy is in danger.

Bolsonaro is a seven-term congressman who surged into the popular consciousness as a hardline law-and-order figure with outsider credibility because of the swirling crises that have engulfed Brazil over the past five years. His racist, misogynist, homophobic outrages are numerous and well-known. Horrifying as these are, merely repeating them does not tell us everything about why Bolsonaro was such an unsuitable candidate — and now will be an unsuitable president.

Bolsonaro’s eulogies to the military dictatorship and its torturers tell us a bit more. Brazil’s “day that lasted 21 years” did not go far enough, in his mind: The dictatorship “should have killed 30,000 more,” he said in 1999, while serving his third term as a congressman. Within the military establishment, Bolsonaro represents an extremist tendency; former military-dictator Ernesto Geisel labeled him “completely beyond the pale” and a "military evil."
https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/brazil-presidential-election-who-jair-bolsonaro-popular-candidate-more-dangerous-ncna925011

Meet the new boss, WORSE than the old boss! Oh so much worse, right? And if you think that we’ve only just begun with Bolsonaro, think again! because he’s got a new BFF in the White House! Get your gag reflexes ready!

Brazil’s new president-elect, Jair Bolsonaro, is an ardent admirer — and shrewd imitator — of his U.S. counterpart Donald Trump. And that could usher in one of the warmest bilateral relationships in the Western Hemisphere.

Trump called to congratulate Bolsonaro on Sunday night, shortly after the far-right congressman scored a resounding victory at the polls, winning 55 percent of the vote following a mud-slinging campaign with a leftist rival.

Bolsonaro and Trump spoke of “a strong commitment to work side-by-side” on issues affecting Brazil, the United States and beyond, the White House said.

Trump has bullied and wrangled with other leaders in the Americas, including Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto.

But in Bolsonaro, Trump will find a doppelganger whose world view and pugnacious style are strikingly similar to his own.
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-brazil-election-trump/a-trump-bolsonaro-bromance-could-be-brewing-after-brazilians-big-win-idUSKCN1N31BZ

[font size="8"]MAGABomber
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s give the wheel a nice strong spin shall we? Ooh, that was a good spin there. And it lands on… A Random Tweet!

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1056391795523895296

Really? We had two terrorist attacks in a week and you’re concerned about baseball? Also interesting use of the word “shellacked” there, Trump! Because that’s exactly what is going to happen to you next week! Thank you audience! Spin it again! Donald Trump. And you know this week they caught the MAGABomber, and oh yeah, he’s exactly who you’d expect – a loner weirdo living full of Trump stickers with Trump’s enemies list in crosshairs in a van who got kicked out of his home because his mom was afraid of his support for Trump. So here’s more.

OK let’s go through the list and see if he meets the profile. He’s a creepy homeless guy living in a van covered with Trump bumper stickers and was a stripper. As Bill Maher said – have we reached peak Florida? Probably! And by the way we may need to play a game of “Blame Game Bingo” at some point because the GOP refuses to blame anyone but themselves. But this might be the stupidest justification of the incident:

An attempt to assassinate at least 14 of President Donald Trump’s most prominent critics did not succeed, thank God. But this direct attack on our democracy also failed to move Missouri GOP Senate nominee Josh Hawley to so much as tweak his portrayal of violent political rhetoric and actions in this country as an exclusively Democratic phenomenon.

At his final debate with Democratic incumbent Claire McCaskill, both candidates were asked whether voters deserve better than the current sub-basement level of discourse. Absolutely, said Hawley. “You hear leaders of the Democrat Party like Hillary Clinton saying that you can’t be civil with people you disagree with. You have Eric Holder, another Democrat leader, saying the new Democrat Party kicks people they disagree with. When you see these mobs popping up in the wake of the Kavanaugh hearings. The screaming, the shouting, driving people out of restaurants, confronting them, this is terrible ... I am disappointed that the Democrat Party seems to have embraced this.”

Let’s see, why were Clinton and Holder in the news in recent days? Oh yes, for having bombs sent to them. Yet in a protracted back-and-forth over incendiary words, neither Hawley nor McCaskill ever mentioned incendiary devices.
https://www.kansascity.com/opinion/opn-columns-blogs/melinda-henneberger/article220347545.html

So if we extrapolate, Clinton was responsible for… inciting violence when Trump constantly has rallies where he screams “LOCK HER UP!!!”??? Are you fucking kidding me? We might need to play a game of Blame Game Bingo next week. Because the excuses coming are far and furious. By the way in case you’re wondering the kind of character Caesar Sayoc is, Michael Moore recently unearthed footage of him at a Trump rally:

Filmmaker Michael Moore posted a video clip of suspected pipe bomber Cesar Sayoc at a rally for President Donald Trump last year, apparently chanting “CNN sucks” with a group of Trump supporters.

It was filmed in Melbourne, Florida, at the first Trump 2020 re-election rally, which was held just a month after Trump’s inauguration in 2017.

“Who we needed to understand were our fellow Americans, lost souls full of anger and possible violence, easily fed a pile of lies so large and toxic that we wondered if there would ever be a chance that we could bring them back from the Dark Side,” he said.

Sayoc, 56, was arrested Friday for allegedly sending more than a dozen pipe bombs in the mail to Democratic political figures and other Trump targets. The van in which he was living was plastered with photos of Trump, pro-Trump slogans, “CNN sucks,” and photos of the faces of Trump critics marked with gunsight crosshairs.
Read more: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/michael-moore-posts-clip-of-cesar-sayoc-at-trump-rally-chanting-cnn-sucks_us_5bd631b7e4b0a8f17ef915dc

And you know what? Skip the meme for this one, we need to show you what his van looks like:

Yes that is fucking insane. You think this guy might be Trump’s #1 fan? Depending on how the trial goes, he’ll either have a cell waiting for him at Supermax or he’ll have a cushy job at Fox News. Sadly, that seems to be the way things are going these days. And by the way, Sayoc’s story started out so innocent – he was just an innocent food blogger who turned to the dark side!

Until 2016, Cesar Altieri Sayoc Jr.’s life on social media looked unremarkable. On his Facebook page, he posted photos of decadent meals, gym workouts, scantily clad women and sports games — the stereotypical trappings of middle-age masculinity.

But that year, Sayoc’s social media presence took on a darker and more partisan tone. He opened a new Twitter account and began posting links to sensational right-wing news stories, adding captions like “Clinton busted exposed rigging entire election.” On Facebook, his anodyne posts gave way to a feed overflowing with pro-Donald Trump images, news stories about Muslims and Daesh (also called the Islamic State), far-fetched conspiracy theories and clips from Fox News broadcasts.

By the time he was arrested in Florida on Friday, charged with sending pipe bombs to at least a dozen of Trump’s critics, Sayoc appeared to fit the all-too-familiar profile of a modern extremist, radicalized online and sucked into a vortex of partisan furor.

In recent weeks, he had posted violent fantasies and threats against several people to whom pipe bombs were addressed, including Rep. Maxine Waters, D-Calif., and former Vice President Joe Biden. His vehicle, a white van plastered with right-wing slogans, came to resemble a Facebook feed on wheels.
https://www.thestar.com/news/world/2018/10/27/pipe-bomb-suspects-social-media-took-a-dark-turn.html

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s give the wheel a nice spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… Chance!

Eh… unlike Trump and Fox News fans, I am actually fine paying my taxes! Spin it again! And it lands on… spying! OK… Ok… OK…. Here’s my whole thing. Remember back during the campaign when they said Hillary was using e-mail servers illegally? Well guess what. I’ll give you five guesses on what Trump is doing with an iPhone. But I always thought he was an Android guy. Yeah that’s exactly it, sir! Trump got hacked, yo! And guess who’s doing the hacking?

In the wake of the 2013 revelations of the US National Security Agency’s (NSA) surveillance program, and amid increasing worries that private firms are using our phones to eavesdrop on us, it’s understandable that many people are now paranoid that their private communications can be intercepted. The president of the United States, however, is apparently not among them.

The New York Times (paywall) reported yesterday (Oct. 24) that Donald Trump wouldn’t restrict his phone calls to more secure lines available to him, such as White House landlines, preferring to conduct many communications—including calls to Fox News—over one of three iPhones. None of the three cellphones are completely secure, though two of them have been altered by the NSA to limit vulnerabilities, while the third, personal phone is the most insecure. As a result, Chinese and Russian intelligence have allegedly been able to listen in, the paper reported, citing unnamed current and former officials. The paper said the officials came by the information via informants in other governments and their own eavesdropping on other governments.

The report said China has been using the information gleaned in this way to form a list of personal friends Trump speaks with frequently, as well as “what arguments work,” hoping to lobby these networks over the two countries’ trade war. That suggests that outsiders are able to access not only the phone numbers the president calls, but also the content of the calls themselves. Stephen A. Schwarzman, chief executive of private-equity giant Blackstone Group, and casino magnate Steve Wynn are on the list put together by China, the Times said.
https://qz.com/1436938/nyt-report-china-is-eavesdropping-on-trumps-unsecure-iphone-calls/

So that happened. And of course the White House is going out of their way to actively deny this is happening. What’s the solution you might ask? How does one keep their phone secure when they’re being spied on 24/7? Well China’s got a solution!

A New York Times report that Chinese and Russian spies are often listening in on U.S. President Donald Trump's conversations with his friends made on his unsecured iPhone drew an unusual response from the Chinese foreign ministry spokeswoman.

If Trump is concerned about the security of his iPhone, he can consider switching over to a Huawei, or cut off communications altogether, Hua Chunying, the foreign ministry spokeswoman, said in response to a question about the Times report. She dismissed the report as another example of “fake news."

“Seeing this report, I feel there are those in America who are working all-out to win the Oscar for best screenplay,” Hua said at the ministry’s regular briefing in Beijing on Thursday.

American spy agencies had learned that China and Russia were eavesdropping on the president's cellphone calls, with China seeking to use what it learns from the calls to prevent an escalation of a trade war with the U.S., according to the Times report, which cited several former and current officials.

Read more: https://www.politico.com/story/2018/10/25/china-denies-spying-trump-iphone-938785

Really? A Huawei? He might as well have a sign on his back that says "hack me!" I mean come on we covered Huawei in the Top 10 before and how they’re probably (read: definitely) spying on you through their crappy phones that nobody wants! But of course Trump’s White House is actively going out of their way to deny this is happening.

The White House on Thursday flatly denied that President Donald Trump's cellphone was compromised after a New York Times report suggested Chinese spies were listening to his phone calls.

"The article written by the New York Times presented inaccurate information about the President's cell phone and its usage," White House deputy press secretary Hogan Gidley said in a statement.

Current and former US officials warned that Trump's personal Apple iPhone was monitored by Chinese spies, according to The Times' report published Wednesday. Trump reportedly used two iPhones that were programmed by the National Security Agency for official use, but also kept a third, personal phone that was unaltered — much like the normal iPhones on the consumer market.

Trump was said to use the unaltered personal iPhone because of its ability to store contacts, the officials said in the report. One of the two official phones was designated for making calls, and the other one was for Twitter.
https://www.businessinsider.com/trump-iphone-tapped-by-china-spies-new-york-times-report-2018-10

I mean come on! It’s absolutely no surprise that Trump fails at understanding how technology works, the guy can barely work an umbrella!

Yeah that happened! So why expect him to be able to work an iPhone?

"They didn't care about emails," he said. "If they did, they'd be up in arms right now as the Chinese are listening to the president's iPhone that he leaves in his golf cart."

Obama had a few other burns for Trump, too.

"Their promise to drain the swamp, that was not on the up and up. Nobody in my administration got indicted."

The former president was in Milwaukee stumping for Sen. Tammy Baldwin, who led her competitor, state Sen. Leah Vukmir, by 15 points in a recent poll.
https://mashable.com/article/barack-obama-trump-iphone/#XPe1uB3b_iq3

[font size="8"]How Is This Still A Thing?
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin the wheel again shall we? Wheel goes ‘round, wheel goes ‘round… And it lands on… A Random Tweet!

https://twitter.com/RightWingWatch/status/1056925151814733824

Worst Social Distortion cover ever, by the way. I don’t remember hearing those lyrics in “Ball And Chain”! Spin it again! Oh hey it’s time for “How Is This Still A Thing”! It’s time once again to ask:

This week: Blackface. How is this still a thing? The idea of applying makeup to your skin to appear of a different race is nothing new, and in fact as old as time itself. But in the era known as 2018, some might think of this practice as… being a bit racist. So why would you? Or why wouldn’t you? Well the reason that Blackface is in the news this week is because of Halloween. And one person in particular – NBC’s Megyn Kelly doesn’t appear to believe that the concept of Blackface is racist.

Sometimes "I'm sorry" just doesn't cut it -- a hard lesson that NBC Today show host Megyn Kelly now understands. Reportedly, Kelly's morning show "Megyn Kelly Today" may be cancelled, according to CNN sources and Variety reports.

Kelly, who never really seemed like a good fit for the NBC morning show, overplayed her popularity earlier this week when she passionately defended people who don blackface costumes for Halloween -- a thing that most Americans understand is definitely not okay, unless their intention is to offend.

"But what is racist?" Kelly asked on her show. "Because you do get in trouble if you are a white person who puts on blackface on Halloween, or a black person who puts on whiteface for Halloween. Back when I was a kid that was OK, as long as you were dressing up as, like, a character."

The backlash was swift. Kelly was roasted across social media and more importantly her colleagues and bosses were appalled by her comments. NBC executives forced Kelly to apologize first, internally to her colleagues, and then to the viewers.
https://www.cnn.com/2018/10/25/opinions/megyn-kelly-blackface-comments-racism-roxanne-jones/index.html

That’s a good point. You can’t be racist if you hate everyone equally. But here’s the thing Megyn, if you have to ask what is racist? You probably don’t know what is racist! However you can’t say something like that in this day and age and not expect the “backlash machine” come after you.

Megyn Kelly is out at NBC after making controversial comments about blackface and Halloween costumes during an episode of her morning show Tuesday.

“‘Megyn Kelly Today’ is not returning,” according to an NBC statement. “Next week, the 9 a.m. hour will be hosted by other TODAY co-anchors.”

During her 9 a.m. hour of the Today show Tuesday, Kelly claimed that blackface was acceptable in the context of Halloween costumes, saying it was “OK when I was a kid as long as you were dressing like a character.” The backlash was swift and even drew criticism from longtime Today co-host Al Roker, who said, “While she apologized to the staff, she owes a bigger apology to folks of color around the country because this is a history going back to the 1830s.”

During her Wednesday show, Kelly tried to make amends, saying, “I want to begin with two words: I’m sorry. I defended the idea [of blackface], saying that as long it was respectful and part of a Halloween costume, that it seemed OK. Well, I was wrong, and I am sorry.”
https://www.rollingstone.com/tv/tv-news/megyn-kelly-nbc-fired-blackface-747389/

So how racist is blackface? Well it’s been around since the 1920s. And it *ALWAYS* gains controversy at this time of year, every year. And why do people keep doing it? Well they think it’s funny and they always try to pass it off as a joke. But the people it hurts aren’t the ones who are laughing.

It happens all too frequently – often at Halloween, but not exclusively – as in 2016, when two white teenage girls in Maplewood, N.J., posted a photo of themselves online in blackface. One student told a reporter, "They thought it was a joke, but it really just was not funny at all."

One of the girls' mother said, "The two girls had no idea of what blackface was, or the history of it."

The history of blackface is long and complex, and deeply ingrained in our culture – in vaudeville and minstrel shows and in movies. Even Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd blacked up.

For more than a hundred years, white (and then black) performers wore dark makeup, creating not only a popular theatrical form, but stereotypes that are still with us today.

Eric Lott, a professor at the Graduate Center of the City University of New York, admitted that blackface makes him uncomfortable. "It does make me feel uncomfortable to talk about these things because they are incredibly disturbing, and revolting," he told DuBois.

Lott says blackface represents a strange mix of envy, fascination, desire and fear.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/history-of-blackface-unmasking-the-racism-reignited-by-megyn-kelly-controversy/

Oh they knew it was racist, they just don’t care. But just because Megyn Kelly said it, that doesn’t make it OK. In fact if you’re in a public profession, don’t do it. Hell, if you are in any profession don’t do it. It just makes you… racist.

An Iowa teacher is under investigation by the Davenport school district after she was pictured at a public Halloween party wearing blackface, according to the Associated Press.

Megan Luloff, a first-grade teacher at Walcott Elementary, was dressed as Lawfawnduh, a black woman character from the movie "Napoleon Dynamite," as part of a group costume at the Walcott American Legion Friday night, according to the Quad-City Times.

Luloff didn’t return messages left Thursday by the Associated Press.

Davenport School District Superintendent Art Tate responded to the situation, saying “blackface is never appropriate in any circumstance by any person.”
https://www.desmoinesregister.com/story/news/2018/10/25/blackface-megyn-kelly-iowa-teacher-davenport-halloween-costume-today-show-why-you-shouldnt-wear/1763687002/

So that happened. In fact Blackface is something you shouldn’t do no matter what the cause is. Even former first daughter Jenna Bush was horrified at Megyn Kelly’s insensitivity.

When Megyn Kelly made the comments about blackface that led to Megyn Kelly Today’s cancellation, she was on a panel with three other people: Jacob Soboroff, Melissa Rivers, and Jenna Bush Hager, talking about inappropriate Halloween costumes. Now, Jenna is speaking out about how Megyn's remarks made her “sad.”

In an interview with E! News, the Today show host said she was disgusted by Megyn's comments. “Well, it was, you know, horrifying, because it wasn’t what we were there to talk about,” she said. “And obviously, in this day and age, but in any day and age, when there's talk of something that would make somebody feel bad, it's not something we stand for ever. Not then, not now. And it made me sad."

“We don’t know what is ahead for her right now,” fellow anchor Hoda Kotb added, “and we don’t really know what the outcome of this is going to be.” Their interview was held before NBC announced Megyn Kelly Today would not be coming back.
https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/entertainment/a24281641/jenna-bush-hager-megyn-kelly-blackface/

There you have it, when a member of the Bush family calls you out for being racist, that’s pretty damn racist! That’s enough to make you ask – Blackface:

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Election Tampering
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin it to win it! And it lands on… buy a vowel! OK, I will buy an E. OK that looks good, can I solve the puzzle? Halloween! Yes, happy Halloween everybody! And it’s time to announce the winner of our costume contest – winner will get a Top 10 Halloween t-shirt and tickets to enjoy a future Top 10 live production. And that winner is… Chris from Brentwood! That is an amazing Frankenstein costume, give it up for Chris everybody! Spin it again! And it lands on… Top 10 Investigates!

The 2018 midterm elections are merely a week away. But are you ready? Is your local polling place ready? Have you already voted? These and many other questions are ones that you need to ask. But there’s plenty of reports out there that voters are being harassed and intimidated as they attempt to participate as they go to the polls.

Tempers are flaring during early voting in Dallas County, Texas, and reports of voter intimidation are on the rise. The county’s nonpartisan election administrator said that the harassment — including name-calling and interrogating voters waiting in line — is the worst she’s seen in decades.

“I’ve been here for 30 years, and this harassment that’s going on, I haven’t ever seen the likes of this,” said Toni Pippins-Poole, the county’s election director. “I’ve seen some other things, props being used and whatnot, but nothing like this type of mentality or aggressiveness or demeaning type of actions.”

At the Lakeside Activity Center in Mesquite, Texas, election administrators received complaints of a partisan poll watcher looking over voter’s shoulders as they cast their ballots and questioning voters on their politics. The person was later escorted out by Mesquite Police Department officers on Monday after refusing to leave the premises, according to Pippins-Poole.
https://talkingpointsmemo.com/news/voter-intimidation-texas-polling-places

Well that was 2 elections ago. but this election as we have a president who has thrown all sense of common decency and rules and laws regarding ethics out the window. So what can you expect when you go to the polls next week? In fact it’s happening all over the country.

As early voting began Monday in Georgia, a group of black senior citizens gathered for a voter outreach event at Jefferson County’s Leisure Center. Members of Black Voters Matter, one of the groups behind the event, offered to drive the group of about 40 seniors to the polls.

But shortly after the seniors boarded the organization’s bus, county officials stopped the trip, prompting new accusations of voter suppression in a state already dealing with several such controversies.

The event, according to ThinkProgress’s Kira Lerner, was a part of Black Voters Matter’s “The South is Rising” bus tour across seven states to host voter outreach and engagement events. Black Voters Matter is nonpartisan, and the group’s leadership did not encourage the senior citizens to vote for a particular candidate or political party, according to LaTosha Brown, the organization’s co-founder.
https://www.vox.com/identities/2018/10/17/17990110/georgia-senior-citizens-bus-removal-black-voters-matter-suppression

And then there’s places where it gets violent. Because this is 2018 and you can easily come to expect that someone with a gun will be at a place where you can vote. In fact there should be more police present at polling place, shouldn’t there?

Early voting nearly turned violent in Charlotte on Wednesday, when a Republican volunteer reported being confronted with a gun and racial slurs at a Mecklenburg County polling place.

Derek Partee, who is black, said three white people angrily approached him at the Steele Creek polling place, which is southwest of Charlotte near Carowinds, in the 11100 block of South Tryon Street.

Partee posted photos of the three on Facebook, including a photo in which one heavily tattooed man can be seen openly carrying a pistol in a hip holster. A few hours after Partee called police, the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department announced it had arrested a 28-year-old Charlotte man named Jason Donald Wayne in connection with the incident.
https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article220574455.html

That happened. So what can you do about it? What can you do to report problems at the polls? Well here’s how it’s going to work because next week we can expect a lot of these stories coming very fast and furious.

This election season, ABC News is joining a nationwide effort to look out for problems that might delay or hinder your vote.
Interested in Midterm Elections?
Add Midterm Elections as an interest to stay up to date on the latest Midterm Elections news, video, and analysis from ABC News.
Midterm Elections
Add Interest

More than 70 news organizations across the country are participating in Electionland, an initiative from the news nonprofit ProPublica, and will monitor and investigate reports of problems casting ballots or irregularities at the polls.

During Electionland’s inaugural coverage in 2016, two women denied the ability to cast their ballots were able to vote, New York restored access to its elections hotline during early voting, and a Texas poll worker misinterpreting the state’s voter ID law was set straight, according to Pro Publica .

With absentee and early voting already underway and Election Day a week away, readers who experience issues while voting — such as registration problems, purged voter rolls, broken machines, long lines, voter intimidation and changed voting locations — can report those concerns to local election officials.
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/election-2018-report-problems-polls/story?id=58828306

Don’t do that. Instead if you see something, say something. Take the same precautions for voter intimidation that they do at the airport. That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… Oh it’s another clip without context!

Whoa, I don’t remember that passage in the Bible! Spin it again! Oh hey it’s time for Holy Shit!

Gather around, my fair brothers and sisters of Nashville, it’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate! For the Holy Church of the Top 10 has convened and it’s our weekly duty to remind you why the holiest among us are also the most full of:

So my fair congregation, I ask you – who is GAWD voting for in next week’s election? There’s two sides to this debate, and the other side wants to claim GAWD for themselves. But it says right here in the Good Book – “GAWD shall not factor into any election for there is separation of church and state”. I know it might not say that in their book, but it definitely says so in ours! But my fellow zealots are claiming that a vote for the other side is a vote against GAWD himself!

American Pastors Network leaders used their “Stand in the Gap” radio show this week to promote a national day of prayer for the midterm elections on October 30. The group says its daily radio program airs on 425 stations. “Exactly one week before Election Day will help focus and calibrate people’s thinking and energy—and we pray they will put that energy into going to the Lord on behalf of our country,” said APN president Sam Rohrer.

Pennsylvania Pastors Network Executive Director Gary Dull was quoted in a Monday email message from APN saying that he is personally “burdened” about the elections, “particularly since we’ve heard of evangelical pastors who are traveling to 30 cities in 10 states to tell Christians to vote Democrat.”

On Monday’s radio show, Dull said, “I fully believe that the left-leaning politicians, the left-leaning media, will do everything that can be done to try to thwart any election that is going to perhaps strengthen the policies of Donald Trump and those of us who conservative and indeed, conservative Christians.”

If liberals have their way, he warned, religious freedom will be “squashed.” He urged listeners to “pray, pray, pray for the election, and then vote, vote, vote for the biblical perspective.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/american-pastors-network-promotes-day-of-prayer-for-midterms-urges-vote-for-biblical-principles/

Now see conservatives? How hard it is to vote the way that JAYSUS would actually want? It’s not that hard, is it? But of course it means that you should only vote for the Dark One, whose name shall not be named in my church! But apparently that’s not what GAWD wants! At least not according to these people!

Self-proclaimed “prophetess” and “weather warrior” Kat Kerr posted a video on her Facebook page last night in which she urged conservative Christians to join God in voting in the midterm elections because “God is going to vote Republican.”

Apparently unaware that the Democratic Party and the Democratic Socialists of America are two different things, Kerr accused Democrats of secretly changing the name of their party in order to conceal their complete embrace of communism.

“I happen to have heard from a very reliable source, they’ve had people sort of undercover checking out the Democratic Party,” Kerr said. “They’ve changed the name of their party … Their new name—because before they kind of hid what they were doing—now, they’re just throwing it all, they’re the Democratic Socialist Party of America.”

“It means communism,” she said. “A socialist republic is communism. They don’t have any rights, they have no freedom, they don’t have arms, they can’t control their own business, they don’t have the right to make as much money as they want to. It strips away everything you have and great oppression sets in.”

Kerr went on to celebrate the confirmation of Brett Kavanaugh because now God supposedly “has a seat on the Supreme Court.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/kat-kerr-god-is-going-to-vote-republican/

Whoa whoa whoa whoa! Let’s back it up here, Kat! Brett Kavanaugh is not GAWD, he’s just a mere mortal, and GAWD would certainly not approve of Brother Brett’s treatment of women! I can guarantee there’s no passage in the Good Book or the Bible where JAYSUS went boofing and 4F-ing. If you’re wondering the kind of candidate that GAWD would approve of, there’s always this guy!

We reported this week that national anti-Muslim activist Philip Haney claimed to have been on “special assignment” in Minnesota smearing state attorney general candidate Rep. Keith Ellison as the Sharia-promoting “face of Hamas.” In addition to his status as a progressive leader and the first Muslim elected to the U. S. Congress, here’s a big reason the Religious Right and its allies are so interested in taking down Ellison: Ellison’s opponent, Doug Wardlow, is an Alliance Defending Freedom lawyer who has aggressively opposed legal equality for LGBTQ Americans. The Alliance Defending Freedom opposes LGBTQ equality in the U.S. and around the world and has been designated an anti-LGBT hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center.

Wardlow is intensely opposed to marriage equality. After the U.S. Supreme Court’s 2015 marriage equality ruling, Wardlow characterized the ruling as a “totalitarian impulse” and published an op-ed at Fox News warning that the court’s decision promoted “a dark and dangerous principle”—“the flawed notion that the state does not recognize and protect—but rather creates—our fundamental institutions, rights, and relationships.” He said the decision would force Americans “to choose between their God and their government.” In a 2013 speech to a Tea Party group, Wardlow said, “You cannot have liberty without strong families. You cannot have liberty with marriage redefined to include homosexual marriage.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/the-religious-rights-candidate-for-minnesota-attorney-general/

Yes, see JAYSUS would want everyone to get married regardless of who they choose to be with. For it says in our good book and it also says in the Bible “Judge not lest ye be judged!”. But this might be one of the craziest justifications I’ve seen to vote for the Dark One. Really, does Brother Rick protest too much? Yes, he does and this is not the first time he’s suggested such insanity!

Yesterday, the YouTube page run by crazed conspiracy theorist and End Times broadcaster Rick Wiles was terminated for violating the website’s community guidelines and Wiles reacted to the development by warning that this is the first step on the path toward publicly executing Christians and conservatives in the streets.

“America’s leftist snowflakes are furious that half the country no longer listens to their idiotic Marxist propaganda,” Wiles said on his “TruNews” program last night. “My ancestors were German Reformed Church members who fled religious persecution in Europe in the 1700s, risked everything to come to America so they could freely worship God. There’s freedom running through my veins. My ancestors were not silenced, and I won’t be silenced by YouTube. Every generation has its tyrants. We have tech tyrants.”

“I have warned for years that a spirit of Nazism is rising up inside the USA,” he added. “The new Nazis are here. America is on the verge of a French Revolution-style upheaval during which leftist mobs will seek to execute Christians and conservatives in order to purge American society.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/after-getting-booted-from-youtube-rick-wiles-warns-that-leftists-will-soon-start-executing-christians/

There you have it folks, the Christian right is so concerned with losing power that they think that a real life purge is happening! But we don’t want you dead, we just want you out of power and out of our lives! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: False Flag Conspiracies
[br] [/font] [br]

Spin that shit! Wheel goes round, wheel goes round, wheel goes round… and it lands on… another clip without context!

This is my new favorite thing! I could seriously watch this all day! Spin it again! Hey it’s time for Beating A Dead Horse:

You know there’s nothing conservatives love than a good conspiracy. They love that shit. And their favorite conspiracy – their go to – is the false flag conspiracy. Or maybe it’s a conspiracy involving left wing billionaire George Soros. Or maybe it’s a combination of the two, but either way they are lightning fast to any attack – whether it’s the MAGAbomber or the MAGAshooter, to call it a false flag. But they’ve been calling literally *EVERYTHING* a false flag! So in case you’re wondering what a false flag is, it’s a conspiracy wherein the source of the actual attack is being disguised by someone or someone else. But be warned – these types of theories are everywhere!

Yes, yes it does! And just a matter of fact let’s go through all the times Alex Jones called every mass shooter ever a false flag operation:

And that was just in a short find on Youtube! And you know why they’re quick to call everything a false flag? It’s because they can’t deal with reality! They can’t deal with it!

Almost immediately after news broke that explosive devices had been sent to a variety of President Donald Trump’s critics, a “false flag” conspiracy theory began to percolate on the far right, emerging from fringe message boards and gaining traction on social media before edging into the mainstream press.

The theory, as many on the far right posited without evidence, was that the bombs were the work of a Democrat who was hoping to make Republicans and Trump look bad a few days before the 2018 midterm election.

But with the arrest Friday of Cesar Sayoc Jr., a suspect who vehemently supported Trump, some conservatives are calling for a dose of reality.

“There was every reason to doubt that the bomber was a legitimate Trump supporter before we knew anything about him,” tweeted Matt Walsh, a widely followed writer for The Daily Wire, a conservative news outlet. “But now that we do have info on him, it would be kooky conspiracy theory territory to stick with the ‘false flag’ hypothesis. Clearly the guy is just a nut.”
https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/social-media/after-false-flag-narrative-takes-hold-some-conservatives-scramble-drown-n924991

Nah. See here’s the thing conservatives – you’re the party of Trump now! These freaks are your base. Why not own that shit? I’ll tell you why they don’t – they simply don’t care. And these are *HIGH PROFILE* conservatives shouting this stuff. You can only yell about something for so long before people start to tune it out!

A range of high-profile conservatives continue to endorse the conspiracy theory that mail bombs sent to 14 prominent Democrats are a “false-flag” hoax by left wingers following suspect Cesar Sayoc’s arrest.

Commentators, radio hosts, a Trump family member, and other pro-Trump figures - say that the mail-bomb campaign was staged to advance the political goals of the very people it seemed intended to hurt.

But the FBI's arrest of Mr Sayoc pointed to the hollowness of these claims, raising questions about why they were voiced on such a fraught issue in the absence of evidence.
The bombs were not “hoax devices,” FBI Director Christopher Wray said. The suspect, 56-year-old Cesar Sayoc, “appears to be a partisan”, Attorney General Jeff Sessions said.

And images circulating of the suspect's van, which was plastered with pro-Trump and anti-Democrat imagery, and what was believed to be his social media feed, painted a portrait of a distinctly right-wing ideology.
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/cesar-sayoc-arrest-mail-pipe-bomb-conspiracy-theories-conservatives-false-flag-trump-a8604316.html

Hoax device? The hoax device is the alt right who continue to not see reality! Everything they do is fake, and everything that Trump does is fake! I mean come on, even Trump himself is buying into the false flag nonsense! Well it makes sense – his hair is fake, his teeth are fake, his weight is fake, why wouldn’t his sense of reality be fake as well?

As the total number of suspicious packages sent to Democrats and other Trump critics ticked up to 12 on Friday, President Donald Trump had a new message: The pipe bombs sent to prominent Democrats, including two former presidents, were a distraction from his midterms message.

“Republicans are doing so well in early voting, and at the polls, and now this ‘Bomb’ stuff happens and the momentum greatly slows - news not talking politics,” Trump tweeted. “Very unfortunate, what is going on. Republicans, go out and vote!”

On Wednesday, Trump urged unity and condemned “acts of political violence.” But he quickly abandoned that message to focus on the media. Now he’s implying that what’s “unfortunate” about the bomb attacks is that the “news [is] not talking politics” as the midterms approach.

These are also Trump’s first remarks after two more packages were uncovered bound for former Director of National Intelligence James Clapper at CNN’s offices and Sen. Cory Booker (D-NJ); he spent the rest of the morning tweeting about immigration and his loss of Twitter followers.

Trump dismissively referred to suspected explosive devices sent to 12 locations as “‘Bomb’ stuff,” appearing to nod to “false flag” conspiracy theories that have taken off in right-wing circles on the internet, from radio host Rush Limbaugh to Alex Jones’s Infowars. These pundits are claiming the pipe bombs are essentially a Democratic plot to “frame” Trump and his base ahead of the 2018 midterm elections, and help drive liberal voters to the polls.
https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2018/10/26/18026926/pipe-bombs-trump-tweet

[font size="8"]This Fucking Guy: Rodney Howard Brown
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin it to win it! And it lands on… Woohoo, I win 15,000 of something! What that is I don’t know, but still, 15,000! Spin it again! And it lands on… This Fucking Guy!

This week’s “This Fucking Guy” is the resident pastor of Infowars, Rodney Howard Browne. This fucking guy. He’s not only the resident pastor of Infowars, he’s also a co conspirator! Yes, any time Alex Jones is out literally yelling at a pile of shit… no we did not make that up, that footage exists!

Maybe it's Alex Jones, maybe it's a false flag! In fact I think some guys in white coats need to come have a nice chat with Mr. Jones. But anyway I’m getting off topic here, this fucking guy Rodney Howard Browne is the type of crazy that Christian conservatives go to and say “that’s pretty fucking crazy!”. So here’s some of the things Mr. Browne has said:

During the final night of the week-long “Celebrate America” revival event that he recently held in Washington, D.C., Rodney Howard-Browne issued a “restraining order” to the Antichrist and the secret cabal that controls the world, spiritually binding their efforts to destroy America.

Howard-Browne, a right-wing pastor and radical conspiracy theorist who laid hands upon and prayed over President Trump in the Oval Office last year, declared that he had been ordered by God to “issue [this] restraining order, and this one is to do with these entities, these groups, the part of the cabal that is running the planet.”

“I don’t care what people think,” Howard-Browne said. “I’m here to deliver a message whether people like it or not. I’m not going to change anything. I’m not looking to be accepted, I’m already accepted by Him. I’m just the messenger boy … I’m just here to deliver the message. If you don’t like the message, go talk to the one who gave me the message, I’m just here to deliver it and to stand and to issue the restraining order.”

“I take authority over every system that has been set in place by the globalist agenda to destroy America,” he proclaimed, “[and] to take this nation through our schools and our universities and our education system, from the day care all the way to the universities and even to the seminaries. I execute a restraining order against you.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/rodney-howard-browne-saved-america-by-issuing-a-restraining-order-to-the-antichrist/

I can only imagine that it kind of went like that. But that’s not the only thing that Mr. Browne has been saying lately. I mean did you know that the people who rule the planet right now worship Lucifer, drink blood, and perform human sacrifices? Neither did we!

During a “Ministers and Leaders Conference” at his Florida church yesterday, right-wing pastor and radical conspiracy theorist Rodney Howard-Browne declared that the world is controlled by blood-drinking Luciferians and that many members of Congress are involved in pedophilia.

Howard-Browne, who laid hands upon and prayed over President Trump in the Oval Office last year, asserted that Trump has been obligated to withhold information about the assassination of President John F. Kennedy because otherwise “they would have to pick up George Bush senior in his wheelchair right now and stick him in Guantanamo prison because the Bush family is a crime cabal.”

Howard-Browne said that despite the fact that Republicans currently control all the levers of power in Washington, they still can’t get anything done “because the whole thing is controlled through the Luciferian structure of the globe.”

“At the highest level, the people that rule the planet worship Lucifer,” he said. “These people perform human sacrifices and drink blood.”
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/rodney-howard-browne-the-people-that-rule-the-planet-worship-lucifer-and-perform-human-sacrifices-and-drink-blood/

Well that’s actually one of the more sane things that Mr. Browne has said and that’s putting it lightly. Mr. Browne really is that batshit fucking crazy. In fact he’s so insane that he actually said that those who criticize laughter during sermons are straight up going to hell.

Rodney Howard-Browne is a right-wing pastor and radical conspiracy theorist who laid hands upon and prayed over President Trump in the Oval Office last year and who is probably best known for leading a so-called “Holy Laughter” revival in Florida in the 1990s.

Over the course of several weeks, Howard-Browne led multiple church services during which attendees were reportedly so overcome by the power of the Holy Spirit that they collapsed into fits of uncontrollable laughter. Some Christian critics have declared that Howard-Browne’s “revival” was nothing more than heresy and Howard-Browne lashed out at them recently, warning that they are going to hell for blaspheming the Holy Spirit.

During an appearance on Sheila Zilinsky’s podcast yesterday, Howard-Browne was asked how he deals with the “complete jackals” who criticize his Holy Laughter revival and he responded by warning his critics about the unpardonable sin mentioned by Jesus in the Synoptic Gospels.

In Matthew, Mark, and Luke, Jesus warns that any sin can be forgiven except for blasphemy against the Holy Spirit, which Howard-Browne asserted is exactly what his critics are doing.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/rodney-howard-browne-says-those-who-criticize-his-holy-laughter-revival-are-going-to-hell/

But here’s probably the craziest thing that Mr. Browne has said lately. So in addition to admitting to being behind one of the dumbest religious movements in history, he’s also going full Hitler and suggesting that Trump’s political opponents be executed for blah blah blah treason something.

On Monday, right-wing pastor and radical conspiracy theorist Rodney Howard-Browne guest-hosted “The Alex Jones Show” on InfoWars, during which he asserted that Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg should be shot for treason.

Howard-Browne, who laid hands upon and prayed over President Trump in the Oval Office last year, was interviewing right-wing activist and commentator KrisAnne Hall, when he attacked Gingsburg for daring to suggest, back in 2012, that Egypt should “look at the Constitution of South Africa” when drafting a new constitution, rather than the U.S Constitution.

“If you hear Bader Ginsburg talk, she talks about the Constitution of America being totally flawed,” Howard-Browne complained.

After Hall recounted Ginsburg’s 2012 statement, Howard-Browne asserted that Ginsburg should have been removed from office because “that was high treason.”

“She should have been impeached, immediately,” Hall agreed.
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/rodney-howard-browne-ruth-bader-ginsburg-should-be-shot-for-treason/

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! There you have it, that’s Rodney Howard Browne – this week’s:

[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin that shit! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Bankrupt? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Spin it again. Hey it’s time for People Are Dumb! Hit it!

So of course you know by now people are people and people are dumb. And we can never go one week without seeing some ridiculously dumb people. Who is stupid this week you might ask? Well let’s start with this story from Fresno. Look…. Look…. If you see a spider, I know your first instinct may be to try to kill it, but really, yeah, don’t be like this guy. Can we all agree on that one?

Yeah so maybe spiders and blow torches don’t mix. Although it is Fresno, they elected and continue to support Devin Nunes. Next up – we’re going overseas to the country of Belgium. So here’s the thing about heists – if you’re in one, maybe don’t return to the scene of the crime? Because that’s exactly what these guys did.

A gang of robbers walk into a shop. The owner asks them to come back later when he has more money, and when they do...

It feels like the makings of a joke, but for a Belgian e-cigarette shop owner this was a frightening reality.

Six people entered Didier's shop in the suburbs of Charleroi in daylight with the intent to rob him.

The salesman told the group to return at the end of the day, when he could give them more money. In the end though, he got them arrested instead.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-45958404

This might be the dumbest heist since they bought the wrong masks in Baby Driver! Next up we go to Cleveland, Ohio. I don’t know if anyone saw Always Sunny In Philadelphia last week but Charlie got himself caught in a bear trap while going Home Alone against two burglars. Yeah that scene is clearly not to be imitated!

A 68-year-old man accidentally shot himself with a gun rigged at his back door.

Edwin Smith was caught in his own trap at about 11:30 a.m. Monday, at 124 Blevins Drive off of Stony Point Road outside of Shelby.

According to investigators, Smith had a shotgun set up facing his back door. He went outside to feed some squirrels. At some point, he opened the door and the gun fired and hit his right arm. Cleveland County Sheriff’s deputies did not immediately know if the contraption malfunctioned or if he forgot the weapon was rigged to fire.

“I’ve never seen anything quite like this,” said Capt. Jon Wright with the Sheriff’s Office.

First responders cautiously went through the home to be sure nothing else was rigged with weapons. The man was taken to Atrium Health in Shelby.

Wright said Smith was severely wounded but alert when he was transported.
http://www.shelbystar.com/news/20181015/man-shot-after-triggering-his-own-booby-trap

Next we go to of course America’s penis, the state of Florida for this one. And you know we’re going to Orlando next week! But this might be one of the most Florida Halloween stories ever. So if you are going to a costume party or other Halloween party, and if you see two people fighting on the street dressed in costume, you’re in Florida!

A 19-year-old Florida man was arrested for allegedly assaulting his girlfriend Saturday night. According to the cops, the man, Patrick Gallway, did it while wearing an inflatable dinosaur costume. The incident started when Patrick Gallway demanded that he and his girlfriend go to a Halloween party, and she told him she didn’t want to go, according to the Smoking Gun

The police report filed by the St. Lucie police department states that the girlfriend told Gallway that she thought she and Gallway should spend the evening with friends and watch movies versus going to the Halloween party. That’s when an argument was initiated between the pair, and Gallway proceeded to hurl his new cellphone on the couch, breaking parts of it. The girlfriend then walked out of the living room in an attempt to defuse the escalating argument.

That’s when the dinosaur-clad Gallway followed her and attacked her, according to the police report. The document states that Gallway shoved her to the ground and held her there by her neck. The report additionally states that he made punching motions and flailed his arms toward areas of her face while holding her down.
https://www.inquisitr.com/5139197/florida-man-arrested-for-allegedly-assaulting-girlfriend-while-dressed-as-dinosaur/

Excuse me a minute! Finally this week we’re also sticking with America’s penis – and also speaking of penises – the Buffalo Bills have a very odd tradition going on with the team everyone loves to hate – the New England Patriots, and well, we question his methods of getting a dildo into a stadium.

ORCHARD PARK, NY-- A Florida man is facing charges for allegedly throwing a sex toy onto the field during Monday's Bills' game at New Era Field.

Erie County Sheriff's deputies say Michael Abdallah, 34 of Oveido, Florida was identified by witnesses and in-stadium video surveillance footage.

Abdallah is charged with disorderly conduct – creating a hazardous/offensive condition. He was taken to the Erie County Holding Center pending his arraignment in Orchard Park Town Court.
https://www.wgrz.com/article/news/crime/florida-man-accused-of-throwing-sex-toy-on-field-during-buffalo-bills-game/71-609615056

That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Deep State Diaries Episode 18: The Federal Election Commission
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s spin the wheel one final time this week! And it lands on… Oh hey Donald Trump!

What? Trump can’t work an umbrella and just leaves it there! I mean I could seriously watch this all day and it’s not getting old! Spin it again. Oh hey it’s time for Deep State Diaries!

It’s time for episode 18 of Deep State Diaries. Yes we’re touring the 24 branches and services that make up the United States government. Everything from the FBI to the IRS to the Pentagon to the CIA to the DPW to the DVA to parks and recreation and all branches and services in between. Of course if you’re here you probably already know more about our government and how it works than your average Fox News loving Trump supporter does. So that’s what this segment is going to address. We are going to do a deep dive into all that makes the United States the United States. Because we here at the Top 10 love to educate as well as entertain. Because we care.

[font size="6"]The Federal Election Commission[/font]

Why are we talking about elections so much? Because there’s a major one happening next week and Trump and his fans and goons are going out of their way to make sure it doesn’t happen. But there’s one agency that can stop them. That is the Federal Elections Commission. You might remember them from such SCOTUS cases as “Citizens United vs Federal Elections Commission” – the infamous case that declared that corporations are people and that they can spend unlimited money on campaigns. So how does the FEC monitor PACs?

Political action committees organized by the 20 largest energy companies in Houston by local employee count have donated more than $5 million to candidates up for election in federal office since the start of 2017. That is nearly four times the figure for similar donations during that time from the employees working at those companies.

Corporate PACs run by energy companies with the 20 largest Houston headcounts contributed $5.18 million to federal campaigns since the start of 2017, according to data from the Center for Responsive Politics published on OpenSecrets.org. Individuals who worked at those companies donated about $1.62 million during that period, according to the data.

But the individuals and the PACs often had different contribution priorities — about 78 percent of the PAC funding went to Republican candidates, while the employees sent just 34 percent of their funding to Republican candidates, according to the CRP data. That left 22 percent of PAC funding and 66 percent of employee contributions for Democrats.
https://www.bizjournals.com/houston/news/2018/10/30/see-how-much-the-pacs-ran-by-houstons-largest.html

But of course with that much money exchanging hands there’s *MASSIVE* potential for fraud. Take a look at what happened when a complaint was filed against a North Carolina candidate:

The state Republican Party may have fumbled a complaint that its executive director said he filed last month against Democratic congressional candidate Kathy Manning.

With some fanfare Sept. 5, state GOP executive director Dallas Woodhouse put out the word that he was lodging a complaint with the Federal Election Commission against Manning’s campaign in the state’s 13th Congressional District for allegedly coordinating improperly with the Swing Left political action committee.

But the FEC said Tuesday that it has yet to receive any such complaint. There’s no immediate deadline, so the protest could be resubmitted.

The Washington-based Swing Left group was formed about two years ago with a goal of electing Democrats to seats in the U.S. House of Representatives that are now filled by GOP officeholders.
https://www.greensboro.com/news/government/elections/fec-has-no-record-of-n-c-gop-complaint-against/article_ca8aead8-0f9a-561f-9769-98f2f0b9a6af.html

So then what happens when you see that kind of fraud? It’s way different from polling place fraud and intimidation in that reporting it can get caught up in a very messy and tangled bureaucratic nightmare and can take years to sort out. Look at what happened in this one case from Rep Mia Love in Utah.

The FEC's letter stated that the funds collected by Love's campaign will either need to be refunded or designated for the general election, CNN reported. The process of redesignation has to be done within 60 days of receiving the money. However, all of the donations Love received were collected more than 60 days ago.

"It seems clear that any contribution designated for the primary election received after the convention would have to be refunded or redesignated," Brendan Fischer, the director of federal reform at the Campaign Legal Center, an organization that supports campaign finance reform, told CNN. "I think there is an argument that, Mia Love knew earlier than the convention that it would be an uncontested primary, but their letter suggests there may have been some ambiguity. So they might be able to get away with it but it's certainly problematic because of this sort of quirk in Utah law that allows a candidate to raise money above and beyond the federal limits that would apply in elections in almost any other state."
https://kutv.com/news/local/rep-mia-loves-campaign-admits-to-improperly-collecting-1m-of-primary-election-funds

[font size="6"]Score Card [/font]

Overall importance: C
How Things Are Going: B
Likely hood To Survive: B+

Overall: A-

[font size="6"]Next Week [/font]

Next week we’re going to check out the biggest governing body of them all, the Department Of Defense!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Marilyn Manson[/font]

**NOTE: Because of the sensitive nature surrounding Marilyn Manson's personal life, his performance will be edited out of future re-airings of this edition**

Thank you Nashville! This was awesome! I knew I picked the right city for a big Halloween show! We are off to Orlando next for our post election special! That's it! Go out and vote! Get out the vote! See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Zanies Comedy Club, Nashville, TN
Special Thanks To: Zanies Management
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: 1st Baptist Choir, Nashville, TN
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
Marilyn Manson Appears Live Courtesy Of: Loma Vista Recordings
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: [email protected]

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

October 27, 2018

Preview For This Week's Top 10 Conservative Idiots

Really? A Huawei? He might as well have a sign on his back that says "hack me!"

*audience laughs and applauds*

This week on the Top 10 it's our big Halloween bash live from Smashville! We delve into the MAGAbomber scandal and he might be the stupidest criminal alive, Trump proves to be a classless jackass, Trump also has an epic cyber security fail, Caitlyn Jenner got conned, and we ask how Blackface is still a thing. Plus we've got a new installments of "This Fucking Guy" where we profile Infowars co-host Rodney Howard Brown, and "Beating A Dead Horse" examines how Trump fans love false flag conspiracies. And in our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates - we're going to show you how your vote is possibly being tampered with a week before the midterms. And in our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in "Holy Shit", our resident pastor is going to show you who God might be voting for next week. Plus an all new people are dumb and the next installment of Deep State Diaries is going to check ou the Federal Elections Commisssion! All this plus a live performance from the man synonymous with Halloween - Marilyn Manson!

Top 10 Conservative Idiots: Wednesdays at 2:00 PM /shameless self promotion

Profile Information

Gender: Do not display
Hometown: California
Home country: USA
Current location: Southern California, North Orange County Area
Member since: Wed May 30, 2018, 12:44 PM
Number of posts: 598

About Top 10 Idiots

This is the official DU account for the new format Top 10 Conservative Idiots separate from the host account Initech. The new format Top 10 will launch June 13th, 2018 and all posts related to the Top 10 (promos, etc) will be posted from this account only. The Top 10 is posted once a week on Thursdays at 2:00 PM. There is a full archive of all past, present and future Top 10 editions that can be found here: https://www.democraticunderground.com/100218599098\ Announcements for our current season schedule are posted in our Best Of editions that appear at the end of each season. Updates are posted regularly on the official Top 10 Mastodon account and the official Holy Shit Mastodon account. The Mastodon accounts are used to announce what's going to be in next week's edition, new content, advertising our segments, and so on. This account will post official Top 10 editions, and any related content including our spinoff series: Holy Shit The Sunday Sermons. If you wish to contact the Top 10 you may do so here: E-mail (all questions, concerns, suggestions, and hate mail welcome): [email protected] Follow the Top 10 on Mastodon: [email protected] Follow The Holy Church Of The Top 10 on Mastodon: [email protected] **This account will ONLY be used to post official Idiots editions, promos, and things related to the Top 10. No other posts will come from this account** Top 10 Wiki: https://www.democraticunderground.com/100211322508

1 2 3 4 5 6 Next »