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jmowreader

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Member since: 2002
Number of posts: 28,320

Journal Archives

Will Hobby Lobby be cutting its ties with the forced-abortion capital of the world?

It's not like the United States isn't covered up in empty big-box stores that could be turned into Cheap Christian Crap factories with all the money they're saving by no longer having to cover contraceptives for their employees.

Today's Safety Warning: Do not make hard candy when you're half asleep

I promised to make a batch of hard candy for one of my coworkers' boyfriends. I'm nice that way. On Friday, I finally got around to doing it.

The recipe I use is very simple: two cups sugar, 3/4 cup Karo (the house brands of corn syrup all contain HFCS; Karo does not.), bottle of candy-oil flavoring, little bit of gel food color. Put the Karo in a pot and heat it to boiling. Slowly add while stirring the sugar, stick in your thermometer, then stir until the sugar all dissolves. Then go the hell away until the temperature reaches 285 degrees. (The official recipe does two things different: it calls for 3/4 cup water, and it asks for a 310 degree final temperature. There are problems with that: if you use water the shit WILL boil ferociously when it hits 205 degrees, and will continue until 220 degrees. If you ignore it for even a second you will have sugar syrup all over the kitchen. Leave out the water and it won't do that. I go with the lower temp because at 300 degrees the sugar begins to caramelize. At 285 the final product is just as hard, but it's prettier because it hasn't started to turn brown yet.)

After you get it to temperature you pour it into molds, and here's the nastiness: I accidentally tipped the funnel I pour it with and got a stream of this shit on my hand. It will fuck you up. Make no mistake about that.

Moonie Times editorialist comes up with the "perfect" new name for the Redskins

You guessed it: He wants the team renamed the Reagans.

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2014/jun/24/taube-why-not-the-washington-reagans/?page=1#ixzz35eye70Zb

Isn't there something NON-political associated with Washington they could name the team after? I was thinking "cherry blossoms" once, but that sounds like something you'd name a Japanese baseball team.

Today's Public Service Announcement: How not to submit a photo to a newspaper

Let us say for the utility of saying that you have a photo on your digital camera that you need to submit to a newspaper.

The correct way to submit this photo: copy it to your computer, create an e-mail message, attach the photo to it and hit send. It takes about a minute, if your fingers don't go very fast.

The Incorrect way, that I have seen more times than I want to think about:

Step 1: Copy photo to computer.
Step 2: Open photo in Microsoft Paint or something else that will open digital camera files. For best results, crank the red WAY the fuck up.
Step 3: Print photo to your inkjet printer. It should be the cheapest-ass inkjet you can possibly come up with, and it comes out even better if half the nozzles aren't firing.
Step 4: Scan the inkjet print. (Right now imagine Sergeant Schultz from Hogan's Heroes saying, "you vill stop laughink!" People DO this shit!)
Step 5: Attach the scan of the ugly inkjet photo to an e-mail message and send.

DU legal minds: Can the Rev. Terry Jones be charged with incitement?

Last Sunday, Army Delta Force operators captured one Ahmed Abu Khattala, who was wanted for his role in masterminding the Benghazi attack of 2012, and delivered him to interrogators.

Who extracted from him the revelation that he ran the attack as retaliation for an anti-Islam video.

The Rev. Terry Jones, operator of an extremist Christian church in Florida, was very heavily involved with pushing this video. What I would like to know: since the video was the catalyst for the attack, and Jones was involved with it, can he be charged with incitement, or another more serious offense?

Does anyone have any idea what Dave Brat is up to since he beat Cantor?

IIRC the last anyone heard from him is when he said he didn't have a "well-crafted" answer to whether he thought there should be a minimum wage. OTOH, Jack Trammell is campaigning.

Two explanations for this:

One is he thinks the office is his just because he's a Republican in the 7th District of Virginia. He might want to ask Senator Coakley how that went.

The other is his handlers and the Koch Brothers know he's not going to wait until October to claim he isn't a witch and that he can fix the "out of control Senate" with Second Amendment remedies, and they would prefer the election not be over before the Fourth of July. Which would lead one to the conclusion they rented from the Taliban the steel box Bowe Bergdahl was kept in, and they're using it to store their candidate until two weeks before election day.

Are Mother's Day and Father's Day actually the same holiday a month apart?

A month ago, my paper was full of ads from companies selling places and events for fathers to take their kids to without mom in attendance, so mom could have a peaceful day.

Now we're full of ads from the same companies selling places and events for fathers to take their kids to without mom in attendance, so dad can "bond" with his children.

There's a difference?

I agree with none of it, but like the Texas GOP platform

For decades the GOP has governed as snakes but has run as cute lil puppy dogs. This document clearly details the extent of their snakeness, and requires each GOP candidate in Texas to affirm agreement with it.

One comment attributed to Bergdahl is disturbing me

Apparently Bergdahl asked his sergeant if his leaving the unit with his weapon and night-vision equipment would cause problems.

This is disturbing on two counts:

Why wouldn't his sergeant have asked him why he wants to know this?

And why wouldn't his sergeant then have gone to someone who outranked him - and more important, the first someone-who-outranked-him he could find - and reported what Bergdahl said?

Skittles, do you do ass-kickings by request?

If so, I've got one for you: everyone in the AP's Portland, Ore., bureau needs some of your special attention.

On May 19, as you probably remember, Oregon's gay-marriage ban was overturned. The AP sent a photojournalist to the Melody Ballroom in Portland, which was performing weddings just as fast as people could get there, to make happy snaps of the newly-married couples. He sent these in:





There's more, but you get the idea.

The photographer they sent was Portland-based Steve Dykes.

http://www.stevedykes.com

They MIGHT have been able to find a more inappropriately-named photog to do this job, but not easily.
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