Have you ever just had a "feeling" about someone that you could not really explain but that

[wnylib]

40. Sure, I have had gut feelings like that.

I think everyone does at one time or another. We often dismiss those feelings, then later, when things go wrong, we say, "I knew better. Why didn't I follow my instincts?"

I think those feelings come from clues so minor that it's as if they are subliminal - the way someone blinks at certain times, or smiles, or their voice tone, etc. The smile does not extend to their eyes, for example, but we don't consciously notice the eyes. We just feel that something is "off."

We carry memories of minor past details and nuances from experiences with people that we don't consciously register, but that influence our impressions of new people that we meet.

Sometimes those gut feelings are positive, too. In the 2008 primaries, I didn't know much about Barack Obama until I saw him with Jay Leno on the Tonight Show. Something in his voice, words, or body language told me that he had "it" - a quality of leadership so innate that it said "presidential" to me. I just knew that he had what it took to not only win the general election, but to be a very good president. In her book, Becoming, Michelle describes how people have often reacted to him that way, just "knowing" that he had sone special qualities.

On a lighter note, animals have those instincts, too. I had a cat once, named Merlin, who took either an instant like or dislike to guys I dated, and showed it. Some guys would fuss over him to score points with me. Merlin reacted to their phoniness with a hiss and a swipe at their hands when they petted him, drawing blood with his claws. Merlin's judgments were always on the mark. I joked that he was my chaperone.