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(11,731 posts)
Sat May 22, 2021, 10:08 AM May 2021

Asking for FMLA this coming week. Scared to death

Many of you kind people have been following my mental-health journey to get SSDI and the stress that my job is causing me. I thank you for your kind words and support that I have received in this community.

Including this bizarre aggressive incident:


I have gone out on FMLA twice in the last 8.5 years; this will be number 3. I feel so weak sometimes. However, my anxiety is off the charts, and I also have depression. I cannot take is anymore and maintain my physical health as well as my mental health. I keep hoping Biden will reverse what the orange asshole has done to average people who need it getting SSDI- making it more difficult than ever, and it is pretty difficult now. This is the sixth day in a row I will be working

I do know Biden overturned the constant reviews the disabled were to be subjected to go through with the end game of throwing them off SSDI. I hope more is happening behind the scenes.

I am worried that there will be an absolute shit show when I ask for FMLA. I hope to get my short-term disability for the 12 weeks, and then go on long-term disability( paid for by my employer) until I, hopefully, get SSDI. We are chronically short-staffed. This will cause a hardship on my, some nice and normal, co-workers. My boss can be very abrupt and volatile. I would consider getting an attorney if there is some issue with me , either, taking FMLA or them trying to fire me. I have saved up some money for the time I will be out.Or, because they have to, there will be angry calm. Due to being worn out for years dealing with this, I have a hard time bearing anything, and I used to be quite confident and resilient in the past. That is now not the case.

So- I am SO FRIGHTENED of asking for it again. Like, shaking thinking about it. I will be ruminating on this for the next few days. Part of me is like take a deep breath and do it. I anticipate arguments with me doing my annual evaluation. Also, doing the evaluation of my young man I supervise. I need zero contact with this job.

I have been reading the NOLO guide to getting SSDI, and I have an attorney ready to rep me when I get turned down, if I do, and am anticipating being turned down.

I took a doctor-prescribed anti-anxiety med, and am having shallow breathing in anticipation of, I think, this Tuesday coming up.

Tired of being scared. Just so tired.

18 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Asking for FMLA this coming week. Scared to death (Original Post) XanaDUer2 May 2021 OP
I'm so sorry this is happening to you. area51 May 2021 #1
Thank you so much XanaDUer2 May 2021 #2
Hi X jpak May 2021 #3
Awww, thanks XanaDUer2 May 2021 #7
I'm sorry, Xana. dawg day May 2021 #4
Thanks, Dawg nt XanaDUer2 May 2021 #12
Rooting for you to be out of there as soon as possible, XanaDUer. Hortensis May 2021 #5
I wanted an office cat XanaDUer2 May 2021 #13
:) In the past, Xana. Hortensis May 2021 #17
Do you have all the necessary paperwork from your physician forthemiddle May 2021 #6
Yes, he's very good about paperwork. XanaDUer2 May 2021 #18
I use intermittent FMLA for my disabled husband ismnotwasm May 2021 #8
Thanks XanaDUer2 May 2021 #9
I think I read your boss actually hit you. Treefrog May 2021 #10
yes XanaDUer2 May 2021 #11
Anything i can do to help. Treefrog May 2021 #14
Thank you XanaDUer2 May 2021 #15
Message me if you need to. Treefrog May 2021 #16


(41,780 posts)
3. Hi X
Sat May 22, 2021, 10:38 AM
May 2021

I'm struggling with pandemic depression and anxiety.

Boy it sucks never experienced anything like it.

Stay on your meds and get them adjusted if you can.

My kitties helped a lot.

Sending kitty head buts


(58,785 posts)
5. Rooting for you to be out of there as soon as possible, XanaDUer.
Sat May 22, 2021, 11:18 AM
May 2021

Itm, the rx for kittens sounds like a good one. We could all use more kittens and less politics.


(1,410 posts)
6. Do you have all the necessary paperwork from your physician
Sat May 22, 2021, 02:00 PM
May 2021

If so, don’t worry about it. If a provider deems FMLA necessary, and if you have your requirements met to fulfill the act, your employer can’t deny it.


(42,208 posts)
8. I use intermittent FMLA for my disabled husband
Sat May 22, 2021, 05:22 PM
May 2021

With I fill out the paperwork, my boss doesn’t get to know particulars, that’s for HR. They never ask why. They are not supposed to.

Good luck!

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