The DU Lounge
In reply to the discussion: Have you ever wanted to Date someone [View all]Chan790
(20,176 posts)It's, among other things, because the situational relationship is inherently one of an inequality of power; there is an implication of coercion to it to ask out someone you have a transactional business relationship in the workplace (it suggests quid pro quo and commodification.), especially if the current relationship is not one the other person has any choice in the initiation of. When you come into my Starbucks, Starbucks says I have to be friendly, outgoing and attempt to meet your wants whether I want to or not; when you ask me out at work, you're abusing that. Even the nicest ask implies consequences if you don't like the answer.
Further, it's inappropriate to publicly ask someone out in front of their peers and work-mates, especially if you're someone they are going to have to continue to interact with and see. It creates an uncomfortable work-environment.
In total, it is not at-all unlike employer sexual harassment in terms of why it is frowned upon.
I'd say the most you can really do is leave the hanging (implied) ask:
"I'm doing X tomorrow with some friends." (Note the full-stop. Period)
If the person says "Oh I love X!" (or something similar) then it is appropriate to invite them. Note that this is not a date, it's a social-calling. It's much lower-key and less-pressure.
Depending how it goes, it's appropriate to ask them out (or create the opportunity for them) during or after, outside of work. (To anybody who has worked retail for a while, this is going to be obvious as to situation. They're typically not going to agree to hang out with you unless you have a shot at the date...or they really like X and want friends to do X with.)