About the use of sexual epithets

[Kurt_and_Hunter]

We say "fuck" and "fucking" as all purpose emotion-strengtheners because of the decline of religion.

We process bad words in a different area of the brain, which is why some stroke victims can only cuss, or lose the ability to cuss.

The modern sexual epithets have been substituted for older religious taboo words because the religious terms no longer fire the bad-word aspect of expression.

That's why we have some nonsensical phrases like, "I don't give a fuck."

"Damn" has been replaced by "fuck" because damn just isn't a bad enough word any more.

Same for 'fucking' as an adjective in place of 'damned.' "Where's the fucking remote?"

At this point use of 'fuck,' and even "mother-fucker" has been largely disconnected from sexual context. (Just as 'damned' was long ago disconnected from images of the final judgment and hell-fire.)

If discrimination against all people who have sexual intercourse was rampant I might feel differently about "fucker" as a slur. Calling someone a member of a culturally 'secondary' class to put them down (woman, gay, black) is always offensive by implication.

So some words like 'cunt' and 'cocksucker' are not removed from all context, and remain offensive in ways 'fuck' does not. As epithets they leave the listener wondering what's so awful about a vulva or fellatio that would make such references stronger negatives than the word "Republican."

In some AA audiences 'nigger' has no power. In Britain 'cunt' has little power. But in most contexts in America they are both frightfully offensive words. It's a matter of how far a bad word has drifted in usage from conjuring specific meaning.

(The FCC recognizes this all-purpose bad word phenomenon in an odd way. You can use bad words to hurt people, but not to describe things. It is okay to call someone an 'asshole' on TV after 10PM, but not to refer an actual anus as an asshole.)

________________

ON EDIT: This post is spurred by me considering why I distinguish "cocksucker" as a genralized swear to describe a Republican or other bad person in the way we accept "dumb motherfucker." In most (though not all) of American society "Cocksucker" still conjures a real meaning. It means you are not a manly man, which is the only "good" class. Women and gay men who suck cock are presumed to be somehow contemptible, or else it wouldn't be a slur.

[uppityperson]

1. 3 main categories of cuss words. Religious, sexual, excretion.

Having come up with this late one night working in an alzheimer's unit and taking notes.

[nyc 4 Biden]

2. Dagnabit!

DUers have dirty mouths!

[ShortnFiery]

3. And your point is?

:shrug:

[insanity]

4. When I lived in Britian

People told me Bush was a 'cunty cunt.' I had never heard that phrase before.

Our use and abuse of language makes words like 'fuck' have transformative meanings. I would venture that 'fuck' is the most versatile word in our language at this point.

[ShortnFiery]

9. Isn't use of the word "Cow" to describe a woman as inflammatory as using the word "bitch?"

In the UK, that is. :shrug:

[insanity]

13. I never thought about it,

In retrospect, many of my mates used both cow and bitch to describe women.

[ShortnFiery]

28. I dunno, it does make me laugh because I haven't heard anyone in the US call a woman "cow"

But it's funny in a mooving way ... perhaps because the steaks are so high ...

Cow dung flung! :P :silly:

[Ian David]

5. The Motion Picture Association of America makes similar distinctions

In deciding whether a movie gets a "PG-13" or an "R" rating, they look at HOW the words "Shit" and "Fuck" are used.

If you use "shit" to describe actual deification, it can get you an "R" rating.

If you use "fuck" to describe the actual, sexual act, it can get you an "R" rating.

However, you are allowed to say "Oh, shit" and "Oh, fuck" a few times before it moves you from PG-13 to R.

Saying, "I wanna fuck you" or "I'm gonna take a shit" puts you in the express lane to an "R" rating.

[TennesseeDem]

11. According to the MPAA...

Saying "fuck" more than once, regardless of the context, moves a film from PG-13 to R.

[Ian David]

15. Yep. You get one freebie, provided it's not used to describe the act itself, IIRC. n/t

[kenny blankenship]

31. "If you use "shit" to describe actual deification"

Best malapropism evar!

[jhrobbins]

38. I didn't notice that -that's too funny. Thanks

[Ian David]

57. Oops. I meant defecation. LOL!

[cliffordu]

6. What the fuck does this have to do with ME???

:rofl:

[mikelgb]

7. hmm

fuck
fucking
fuck
damn
fuck
fucking
damned
fucking
fuck
mother-fucker
damned
cunt
cocksucker
fuck
nigger
cunt

oops I forgot the context and the "" and the ''

fuck

[TheCoxwain]

8. For me .DU is an outlet .. I dont swear during conversation ( though I used to be a Sailor and have

a high tolerance for really filthy shit) ... I let it all out in DU.

[Kurt_and_Hunter]

14. I am the opposite. On DU I know I am talking to people I don't know.

I use some language with friends, where everyone knows what they mean within the group, that I wouldn't use with people I don't know well.

[pnwmom]

50. Thanks a bunch. n/t

[brendan120678]

10. My most over-used curse...

is still probably 'Damn,' and its variations:

Damn
Dammit
Goddammit
Damn you

Although, I have noticed that "Son of a freekin' bitch," has crept into usage more often.

I usually try to avoid "fuck." It's like in A Christmas Story: The mother of all swear words.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

12. And then some people just invent "context' and pretend to be offended.

"Douchebag," for instance.

Or cartoon penguins.

[JuniperLea]

22. I've always been fond of "cumstain"

And if you say, Jesus Fucking Christ you Cumstain" you've hit religion, sex, and excretion, as noted by a fine DUer up-thread.

[Curtland1015]

47. I called someone a douchebag once, in a joking way, and he laughed...

...but someone else there got REALLY offended. Started ranting about how bad a word that is, etc, etc, etc...

I was kind of shocked. I've heard this same person use MUCH worse words. But "douche bag" is some evil epitaph?

I don't get some people.

[Curtland1015]

52. There HAS to be some sort of middle ground...

I think there are a lot of times when people say wrong or offensive things, and I think a lot of those times they don't stop and consider how their language may offend or hurt others.

ON THE OTHER HAND, I think there are a lot of people looking for a reason to be offended. Or at the least taking offense way too easily. If seeing a couple of "bad words" online is the worst thing happening to you, sometimes you just need to let it slide. Bad words are not ever (ever ever) going away.

People on both extremes need to learn to calm down a bit.

[Ian David]

60. I was kicked out of a cellphone text message group over a dispute about the word "rape"

I posted a message to the effect of "Conservative talk radio host whatsisname arrested for rape."

The moderator replied back warning me about my language, saying, "Some people find the word rape offensive. Please refrain in the future."

So, I re-posted it as, "Conservative talk radio host whatsisname arrested for forcing his penis inside a woman's vagina against her will."

Next thing you know...

BAM!

Kicked from the group.

Bastard.

[Alter Ego]

16. FUCKING FUCK ON A FUCK SANDWICH WITH FUCK SAUCE.

[Kurt_and_Hunter]

18. See, you were okay until "Fuck Sauce" which does conjure an image

[dem629]

17. What the fuck is the fucking point?

;)

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

19. Well, I Wouldn't Fuck That Cocksucking Cunt Palin No Matter How Much The Goddamn Bitch Begged Me.

:hide:

[ZoltarSpeaks]

20. Six seasons of "The Sopranos" enhanced my vocabulary

But I try to keep it mostly under my breath, and definitely out of print.

[sharp_stick]

21. In Quebec

I quite enjoyed learning that yelling out fuck and anything else related to sexual or excretory phenomenon would get you looked at funny but that's it. God help you though if you mention the little thing at the front of the church with the curtain that holds the chalice, crackers and other stuff. Old people will form a ring around you and come at you with their canes.

Tabernac Asti Sacrament...

http://technorati.com/videos/youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DVLMN4U1FMNM


http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/12/04/AR2006120401286.html

[Left Is Write]

23. "Fuck" is so overused that it's also losing its strength.

It's a word I find useful, so I say it sparingly in order to preserve its impact.

[jobycom]

24. Context is everything.

If I tell a romantic partner to fuck me, it has a delightful quality, whereas if I tell an adversary the same thing he may draw a weapon.

Words like cocksucker and cunt have such strong connotations for some because of the implications. Call a man a cunt and you imply he is effeminate in a negative way. Cocksucker implies either homosexuality, effeminacy, or subservience. Call a woman a cunt and you imply that she is the most negative stereotypes of her gender. Etc. The only reason these words have power is because of the connotations comparing them to other groups they may be offended to be compared to, and the implication is that those groups--gender, orientation, etc--are insulting to the abuser and the abusee.

That's why they rightfully anger people around here. They are degrading to everyone, not just the person being attacked.

As for the N word (a word I won't even say neutrally in quotes), the connotation coming from a white person is that being African American is an insult. The connotation from an African American is usually one of camaraderie or belonging--in the way that most people try to turn insults into less offensive forms of identity: yankee, redneck, Cajun, for instance. The connotation is not the same coming from within the group as from without.

There's a funny scene in the recent movie whose name I've forgotten starring Seth Rogan. An African American counter person is talking to a friend, and a little white guy standing behind him tries to interrupt. "I just want to order a coffee... black..." he says timidly. The counter person glares at him and says "Can't you see we're talking... White." There's as much intimidation and offense in the word "White" as used there as in many a more "naughty" word hurled as an insult, because of the connotation.

It's not about how the word has become accepted over time. It's about what the insulter means by the word, and what exactly the insulter thinks is insulting about the word. That's the outrage around here over cocksucker and cunt. Nobody gives a flying fuck about sex words. It's derogatory connotations that anger people.

[ismnotwasm]

25. To a point

Any gendered and racial epithets especially when used as pejoratives, still have power to harm. I usually stay out of any debate, because I'm a dedicated potty mouth. However, I also have a diverse, useful, working vocabulary with a great love of words. Perhaps that's why I see the power to harm.

I also believe that certain words, like the symbol used by Nazi's, will never loose the power to harm. Nigger is one of those, but I'm white, and it's a personal belief, not personal experience.

I remember Richard Pryor in one of his televised appearances, after a return from Africa (Big Continent, I don't remember where he went) announced he would never refer to a fellow blacks as "nigger" again.

As a feminist, to me gendered epithets are underrated in their power to harm, to reinforce stagnant and subjugating roles for both women and Gays. Given enough time, perhaps this will change. The infamous (on DU) "bitch" is interesting for the emotion it raises and argument it causes. It's been taken into our culture, stretched and changed until almost unrecognizable. Until it comes to a woman with certain characteristics. Then a bitch is just a bitch.

There was a big deal announcing Palin was a "bitch" which made me laugh. She's the type of person in our culture to take it as a complement, to accept and expect it. Not the word of choice to describe her I'd use.

So although I love to swear in the way I do, I love to interject "forbidden" words with the vocabulary I've learned through hard word--it connects me to past I value-- certain words in certain contexts I don't use, either out of respect and acknowledgment for past harm, or as a personal choice as a harm I perceive.

[EstimatedProphet]

26. Oh, karkfumb!

[LostinVA]

27. Agreed -- which is why I started a thread last week about calling Ashley Todd gender-specific names

[seabeyond]

29. this sounds like a 20 yr old argument. i fuckin say fuck all over the place and i do it really well

BUT.... i am clever enough to figure out that not all places warrant/allow/nor should accept that kind of language.

and though i fuckin cuss fuckin thru out my days and in fuckin particular posts, i automatically do not cuss in other places. there is a reason for it. even normalized, it is still crude, and still offensive and does not have a place in all things

IF something is particularly offensive to a group, i am considerate and decent enough not to purposely offend. IF i chose to purposely offend, then i should embrace the repercussion without a bitch or justification

the two words you chose are both to demean and insult still in the u.s. you may find an argument to insist that a particular group should not feel demeaned or insulted, but when those words are used, that is the intent and cannot walk away from that intent.

[Forkboy]

30. The comedian Glenn Wool does a bit on swear words losing their power.

And he goes on to ponder what we'll have to say to shock people in the future. I won't post it here as it's definitely not PC, but his point is a good one.

[nc4bo]

32. dang, darn, egads, dirty rat, boom-boom, stinky, dookie-head, etc. Everything old will be new again

:rofl:

[Virginia Dare]

33. Epithets are meant to be offensive...

or am I missing something..:shrug:

[undeterred]

34. When a gay person complains everyone takes a step back.

When I've complained as a woman about the word "douchebag" and all its variants, which I absolutely despise, I am ridiculed and it never stops for a second. Eventually the gay tainted words go back out into circulation here too.

And its mainly straight white males who are offending, and they're offended by being censored, poor little babies.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

35. Well thank god for small favors.

[seabeyond]

36. not only are you ridiculed. i find that the males tend to debase, demean as a means to ridicule the

woman. the very act they do using these words in the first place.

and yes.... the poor little white male as they justify with "teasing" "quit being so sensitive" ect...

throw back at them about their itsy bitsy, teeney weeney, little penis and the whole world has come to an end.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

40. Douchebag....

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

One of the greatest threads ever!

[undeterred]

42. There isn't anyone on this board who cares less

about whether they hurt or offend women than you.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

43. You Couldn't Be More Incorrect.

I absolutely care about whether a woman is hurt or not. But using the word douchebag doesn't hurt women. It only hurts over the top irrational zealots that really need to find hobbies.

:hi:

[undeterred]

44. Look at how obtuse you are.

You are incapable of seeing yourself.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

45. Au Contraire Mon Touchy.

I see myself just fine, and am as direct as direct can be.

Find me a woman who thinks using the term douchebag demeans all women everywhere, and I'll show you an over the top irrational zealot that really needs to find a hobby.

:hi:

[undeterred]

46. Why don't you make your own post in GD and invite women

to respond to it?

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

49. Because No One Gives A Flying Douchebag Fuck, That's Why.

[melody]

51. Certified female here responding - GMAFB

We say dickhead, dick, dickwad for men -- is that demeaning to men? Not everything gender-specific is a put down.
What makes "douchebag" an insult isn't that it's affiliated with women, it's because it sounds funny and due to its
particular function (see also "asswipe").

Tell you what, every time I want to say "douchebag" instead I'll say pigknuckles. Whenever you say "pig knuckles" in
my post, think "douchebag". Within 48 hours you'll be dissing "pig knuckles".

Pretty soon we'll have no language left.

[Warpy]

I don't particularly like it but I find the word police

infinitely more offensive.

Nothing wrecks a site more thoroughly than the word police haggling over every single pejorative.

[noamnety]

54. I see you are arguing

with someone named "ignored."

I'm guessing it's one of the self-declared white male "experts" on what oppressed groups are allowed to find offensive. Also guessing it's one of the dudes who considers himself a "feminist" but feels the need to insert himself into every conversation about women's rights to let us know how we aren't doing it right/we don't recognize sexism when we see it, he'll let us know if something is sexist (cause he's the expert). Am I close? :)

[Ian David]

59. I always thought "douchebag" was gender-neutral, since there are anal AND vaginal douches. n/t

[Gwendolyn]

64. Douchebag just means someone is a pretentious jerk.

You're thinking of the word "douche," which implies that someone is so useless and brain dead, they are equivalent to genital cleansing liquid. It is well established that these cleansing liquids do not work, ergo the reference to useless.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

37. You have been

bitching all morning about how words effect you.

You are beginning to become tiresome with your moralization and how you have elected to take these words literally.

We got it. You want everyone here to conform to you. You are the kind of person who has to have a dimensional image that goes along with a word. Me? Not so much.

Welcome to my Ignore list.

[Name removed]

39. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[LostinVA]

41. WTF?

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

58. You need to check yourself.

He's been bitching since last night.

[rucky]

48. This thread is making me laugh my rectal anus off.

[ShortnFiery]

63. I think I can speak for everyone here when I say "we're all very fond of uranus."

But in the end ---> profanity = Double Plus Evil. :evilgrin:

[pnwmom]

53. Thoughtful post. Obviously too thoughtful for some here.

FWIW, I agree with you.

[Texasgal]

55. Less than a week to go

and we're arguing about saying "fuck you"?

Really?

[Jed Dilligan]

56. I fuck my mom every day, and I'm offended!

[ShortnFiery]

61. Was that before or after she DID the local high school football team?

See, I grossed you out and didn't even use profanity. ;)

[bridgit]

62. Bugger It All!!

http://www.nailmaster.ru/fuck.html