"Yesterday Boston Was Under Attack By Lite-Brites" (A Funny Randi Rant, Edited)

[orleans]

from www.therandirhodesshow.com
thursday feb. 1, 2007

"Yesterday Boston was under attack by Lite-Brites. Next thing it'll be See-N-Says are giving the clues to the Boston FBI. 'The Cow Says Mooo.'

"This was insane. The whole city of Boston shuts down because of a big Etch-A-Sketch scare. 'It goes vertically and horizontally--oh no! Oh god. And then all of a sudden the message disappeared...'

"This was sick. Maybe we should just get the Department of Homeland Security to consult the Magic 8 Ball: 'Are we going to be attacked today?' 'Answer: Hazy--Ask again later'

"...it was a hoax, it was guerrilla marketing which is non-traditional ways of marketing something. And they were marketing this TV show on the Cartoon Channel. Oh, for god's sake! How bad are they gonna freak out when the Si-Fi Channel starts doing promotions? 'The Si-Fi Channel's marketing! Nobody's safe! Quick! Bisquene and duck tape, everybody! Hold your breath--we're all gonna die! It's the Si-Fi channel!'

"'Look! Look! Airplanes are attacking Honolulu! Oh...no. It's the History Channel. Oh.'

"You can't tell the difference between TV promotions and the real thing?

"...here's the best part in this article from the Boston Channel.com. And this is the most beautiful thing when you consider that Bush can keep you safer than anybody else--which is how they sell him to you. "Two devices at the Longfellow Bridge and the Medical Center, however turned out to be unrelated to the marketing campaign, police commissioner Edward Davis said."

"What? Two devices were unrelated to the marketing campaign? What were the two devices? ... It was...THE MAN FROM OPERATION (Be on the look-out! All points bulletin. APB, APB. Alright, what are we looking for, Chief? Um...you're looking for someone with butterflies in his stomach, water on the knee, writer's cramp, a wrenched ankle and a funny bone! Oh no! It's the "Operation!" It's the "Secret Al-Qaeda Operation Guy!"

"What were the two devices? And they never tell you what the two devices were that were not related to the marketing campaign.

"It was actually a promotion for something called Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Which I had never heard of so I had to go and see what it was. It's a cartoon on the cartoon channel that features talking french fries, milkshakes and meatwads. ('We're being attacked by French Fries! We told you about those damn French!') And milkshakes. And wads of meat.

"What the hell is wrong with us. I mean, honest to god, "poison pens," "exploding cows," "model airplanes." Oh, for Pete's sake, someone's snorting the glue that comes with those model airplanes and trying to scare the pants off everybody by shutting down entire cities. 'Cause we're about to attack Iran. Don't you understand? It's so predictable.

...

"Now we know that in 2004 Tom Ridge was manipulating that stupid traffic light we had as our big warning system. We should do what D.C. does--you know what they have on their traffic lights? They have how many seconds you have to cross the street befoRe you DIE! And they kept raising it and lowering it, and raising it and lowering it. ORANGE! ORANGE! ORANGE! Yellow. ORANGE! Yellow. ...

"Have you seen the two guys they arrested? They arrested guys for MARKETING! They had dreadlocks, they were tattooed and pierced--they graduated from the Massachusetts College of Art. If these two guys were a terrorist threat then every single person on the lower east side is part of a sleeper cell.

...

"The guys who got arrested are guerrilla video artists. The guy sings in a band called Super Fiction. He should not be arrested for being a terrist, he should be arrested for being a geek. He should be arrested for being a guy with dreadlocks who happens to be...WHITE! (Which is wrong. All that means is that he doesn't want to brush his hair.)

...

"Death by Lite-Brites!"


"We're all gonna die...by toy.

"Cause of death: Twister."

(she was hysterical. download the show from www.whiterosesociety.org)

[ConsAreLiars]

1. That won't play well with the "9/11 Be afraid! Submit to Authority!" crowd here

on DU. But it sure is the truth. Scare tactics, even if they require believing that some evil genius would be create and plant bombs that (oh so tricky) hid themselves by flashing bright lights in public places for weeks before actually detonating.

[MADem]

2. It doesn't play with the "Let the corporate GOP masters wipe their asses on Boston

without any consequences" 'crowd' either.

But hey, this looks JUST like a cartoon, doesn't it? Silly of anyone to report this!

http://www.kirotv.com.nyud.net:8090/2007/0201/10892549_480X360.jpg

[JohnnyRingo]

3. I'm having fun with it...

Look Out!! ...my avatar is a WMD

Here're some Freeper posts from PatriotBoy:

To: Howlin
Dry run.

To: Howlin
testing reaction times

To: Howlin
It looks like there is all kinds of testing, testing, testing going on.

To: Howlin
How could they find so many hoax bombs so quickly? That says a lot about the alert level of the passers by. Or were there also threats phoned in?

To: Howlin
Welcome to John Kerry's America

To: Howlin
Hate to see this happen, but could it be the libs are reaping what they sowed?

To: Bushbacker1
It's going to be hard to dismiss this many.

To: Howlin
I hate to sound like a conspiracy nutjob but it happened on the same day London police thwarted a planned attack.
Coincidence? I dunno....

To: Bushbacker1
Shep says that the BPD says they are "hooks devices."
What is that?

To: jdm
It seems like it's always Boston, doesn't it?
Liberalville! Like I said before, the libs are reaping what they've sown!

To: theanonymouslurker
Exactly. in this case "hoax" = "practice".

To: theanonymouslurker
Perhaps. Or maybe trying to create a "cry wolf" scenario so the next real incident won't be taken seriously.

To: Semper Vigilantis
Not only practicing, but testing the system to observe how long it took to be reported, and what happened when it was. Terrorists can learn a lot from this, and with all the news coverage detailing the responses, this is an effective "dry run" for both the US authorities and the terrorists.

To: DocRock
According to FOX one of the packages contained a photo of a guy flipping off the authorities.

To: cripplecreek
Do Islamists use the bird sign? Don't think I've ever seen one flip somebody off.

To: txflake
With muslims the bottom of the feet is offensive for some reason.

To: Kimberly
What I heard on CNN is the circuit board LIT UP with a SMILEY FACE and the a MIDDLE FINGER as flipping one off.

To: Howlin; All
Shep on Fox keeps talking about "stoners"....
Can anyone clue me in on who or what these are?

To: BurbankKarl
The PD scanner broadcasts live calls from citizens?
Maybe this isn't a hoax or a test. Startin to worry.

To: Recovering_Democrat
Thank God this is just a simple law enforcement issue /kerry.

To: theanonymouslurker
Apparently islamos have a decent support infrastructure in Boston and at Logan.

[orleans]

4. lol. (freeps are such assholes!) n/t

[Berry Cool]

5. I admit, while I think the whole campaign was stupid and ill-advised

and that nobody who thought the items were suspicious can really be blamed, Randi's rant about an APB on "the man from the Operation game" had me laughing to tears.

[orleans]

6. same here! it doesn't translate that great into writing, but the way

she said this--her voice, her timing--it was so good!