the good news from HELL is totally ignored by the MSM

[msatty99]

The public is not getting the true, real story about HELL. The MSM only reports the negative "headline grabbing" stories. Come on! The whole truth is that we have no energy problems at all here in HELL. Our populace has NO utility bills to pay, never has to worry about food or water. A retirement plan than provides security for ... hell, ETERNITY.

Did I mention the entertainment value? We have some of the very best
of Hollywood, Television and, for those of you into retro or even more
antique, Vaudeville. Our music entertainment is even more exceptional
especially if you like Blues and Jazz. (Not much in gospel we admit)

We can also provide absolute security from Foreign Invasion. We have
the most secure borders in the UNIVERSE.

Did I mention NO TAXES?

For Heaven's sake, you would think the MSM would give us some press
on one of these great benefits.

If you are of a political bent, I can assure you that we have some of
the very finest in past political figures here. You haven't "lived"
until you have heard Machiavelli debate with Dr. Goebbels on a
late Friday night 'roundtable'.

But will the MSM give us a break? Not in a millenia !!!

But, I promise you, all you 'right thinking' americans (especially
you GOPers with head and heart in the right place) WE hear you!
And, moreover, we have a place in mind for you. Welcome.

-Satan:evilfrown: :evilgrin:

[Fridays Child]

1. well done!

:)

[Buck Rabbit]

2. Cute, you little devil.

[Jack Rabbit]

3. They just built a new high rise just for the neocons

That's really hospitable, don't you think? Let's hear for Satan and his crew!!

[msatty99]

4. Satan replies: Yes, thanks for mentioning that...its a great story

We have a special place for the neocon's. AND NO ONE IS COVERING IT!!!
This a totally up to date, bauhaus inspired, glass fronted structure
with Lake of Fire views. Each unit has a specially calibrated thermostat
on the HVAC system that increases the temperature every time the Bush administration tells the truth. That way....you will always be at that
'perfect' 70 degrees, right?

We admit, we have a slight problem with the water system...but we
expect Scotty McClellan to be announcing that will be solved very soon.

-S.:evilgrin:

[Gabi Hayes]

5. haaaaa....!I!I!I!!I! I"m sooooo wasted! That's my skull!

[Gabi Hayes]

6. how can this only have one "R?"

that was mine, BTW

[msatty99]

7. The reason this only has one R is that the MSM

refuses to tell the good news. Therefore, when the people here
some of the true facts about HELL, they are still too brainwashed
by the MSM biased view of HELL that they cannot bring themselves
to K and R this thread.

-S. :evilfrown:

[Gabi Hayes]

9. thank you satan....here's my favorite site of yours

http://www.yourgoingtohell.com/

[msatty99]

13. Satan replies: That is a WICKED site...yeah!

:evilgrin:

[Gabi Hayes]

14. sure n it is!

did you get to hear the music?

the BEST!

[msatty99]

15. S replies: I loved that tune! nananananana! very melodious!

[Gabi Hayes]

16. your taste is excellent, as always, your excellency. Now...

how bout some of those Bush gets introduced to hell jokes?

[brokensymmetry]

8. You forgot to mention...

free heat! After all, the chances of Hell freezing over are practically zero!

No more rained-out events!

Besides, those bronze doors are always nice and shiny - no paint needed!

Really, you'd think someone would look at the positives.

[msatty99]

10. Satan replies: It's the LIBERAL BIAS that won't tell this good news

and I for one am damned sick about it! :evilgrin:

[Gabi Hayes]

12. practically zero....

[Redstone]

11. Well written.

Redstone

[Morning Dew]

17. nonsense, you haven't opened a single fire station

;)

[msatty99]

18. Satan replies: That'll probably be the "BIG STORY" in this

news cycle...Why do you HATE HELL?

[msatty99]

19. Satan replies: as a matter of fact, ...THAT"s a PLUS

Your post completely misses the point that HELL is so secure that fire stations are not needed
in the 'usual' sense. One of the greatest benefits of HELL is that no matter if you catch fire,
we guarantee that you will not 'burn up'. You cannot be 'finally consumed' by flames here.
So, since you can't really be killed, what's the big whoop?

As a side benefit, there are no 'firement' around to stand about at intersections holding rubber
firemen's boots pestering passing motorists for small change for some infernal charity or another.
No grubbing around in your pockets for coins, No scrambling around in the dashboard for small
change! As a matter of fact, we have NO CHARITIES here to pester you with. No mid-dinner telephone
calls asking if you have something for (shudder) the Salvation Army! You are free as the
breeze from any pesky guilt about not contributing MORE.

-S :evilgrin:

[msatty99]

20. Im kickin' it for MONDO JOE my buddy

[msatty99]

21. another kick for Mondo Joe