Help Please, Critique this Democratic Campaign Ad Idea...

[Laura PourMeADrink]

I need a critique for my campaign ad idea. I think I need better verbiage..
Background: Patriotic music playing

Video Clip: JFK's famous "Ich bin ein Berliner" speech



Voice Over: Do you remember how America was once revered and admired in the world?



Voice Over When America promoted peace?


Voice Over And building bridges?






Background Switch to more serious, somber music

Voice Over Did you know that in a BBC poll, 11 countries(Source)http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/2994924.stm)were asked who is the more dangerous to world peace and stability, the United States was rated higher than al-Qaeda by respondents in both Jordan (71%) and Indonesia (66%). America was also rated more dangerous than two countries considered as "rogue states" by Washington.

It was rated more dangerous than Iran, by people in Jordan, Indonesia, Russia, South Korea and Brazil, and more dangerous than Syria by respondents all the countries, except for Australia, Israel and the United States.








Voice over Is this the way you want America to be seen in the world? We believe there's a better way, a more peaceful way.


VOTE DEMOCRATIC.

[AndyA]

1. LOVE IT!

LOVE IT!!!

[Greyhound]

2. Damn! no time now. Will be back tonight.

:kick:

[Laura PourMeADrink]

3. promise?

[Greyhound]

7. Yes.

[Greyhound]

30. Well it took till morning, sorry.

My suggestion is that the long voice-over is too convoluted to make the message clear (I had to look at your source to make sense of the statistics). Perhaps if you dropped the qualifiers
(Voice Over In a BBC poll, 11 countries were asked who is more dangerous to world peace and stability. The United States was rated more dangerous than al-Qaeda by 2/3 of the respondents of both Jordan and Indonesia. America is also considered more dangerous than Iran, by people in Jordan, Indonesia, Russia, South Korea and Brazil, and more dangerous than Syria by respondents in all the countries, except for Australia, Israel and the United States.
While views are split on America as a whole, 70% of the group thought the US could do more to avoid the killing of civilians.) I also think a brief shot of soldiers and civilian casualties would be good here.
Now to see what others think.

[Coexist]

4. It is a WONDERFUL idea -

but FWIW - a lot of people now (and frustratingly) equate Peace with Soft on Terror.

how about something like "there's a better way, a more American way"

[Laura PourMeADrink]

11. You're right, I was thinking about that too. Yes, something that

incorporates both protecting ourselves and promoting peace at the same time. I like what you said.

[katinmn]

5. Wonderful! did you see the crowd shots from India?

http://rising-hegemon.blogspot.com/2006/03/nobody-anticipated-so-many-protesters.html

[Laura PourMeADrink]

9. thanks, I added pic. I need to find the detail on size of crowd, etc.

[C_U_L8R]

6. Nice Job

The set-up is great.. the payoff with the statistics may be a bit much for TV...
you may want to explore ways to accomplish the same point with less words.
Truthfully you don;'t need much to get the idea across in a powerful way
JFK > Carter > Clinton <pause> BUSH

Good Work !

[Coexist]

8. I like that!

[Laura PourMeADrink]

10. ok, thanks. Good point. I will simplify the stats. I do think that they

can be powerful too. I remember how floored I was when I heard a poll of young people from Canada thought the US was as bad as nazi germany or something like that. I remember thinking, "shit, now we have even lost our closest neighbor and ally.

[wtbymark]

12. Get Rid of the "There's a Better Way" soundbite

that's the response from the Dem response of the SOTU. Says, "we are whimps, that are too nice and will be the same as usual choice" - sounds like the tag to a food show.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

18. hey, thought I'd heard that before somewhere ! Thanks

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

13. This looks good

Have you thought who could do the voice over? I'd suggest the "politically active actor" who is doing the voiceovers for the new Nation commercial-check out my sig line for his name.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

17. thanks for the tip

[Hidden Stillness]

14. A Total Impression of Greatness vs. Shit

This is a fabulous idea, and the contrast between good Democrats working to solve problems in the world, and the bizarre fantasy-world nightmare of Bush/Republicans, the contrast between "Good Government"/rule of law, and ripping modern civilization apart to grab at the profits, is just right. I would stay completely away from slogans except to show the lies of Republicans; the whole point would even be that they are "all slogan", and to equate slogans with no results as lies. There should be a strong, overiding sense that the country/the world are in good hands when we are there running things, and under neverending attack when criminal, corporate Republicans are there.

There should be a building, stirring feeling of excitement and greatness, a country once again on the move, etc., when you hear these Democratic quotes and ideas, as contrasted with the incomprehensible, deathly incompetence and cold uncaring of this Administration's "response" to everything. The JFK, Carter, etc., references are great, and there should be more, as if the idea of "this whole Party is filled with these great, smart people with conscience." You wouldn't need your own narrative so much as several great excerpt quotes showing what the difference is. Franklin Roosevelt took office on March 4, 1933, and immediately went to work solving the multiple problems of the Depression. No "tested slogans" or "framing," but instant action on programs. "Let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is--fear itself," and later, "Our greatest primary task is to put people to work." Just after that, a whole series of New Deal programs were launched, to help people, now, with their problems. Roosevelt started banking reforms to protect people's savings and to stop "panics" and runs on the banks. The first "fireside chat," explaining policy to the American people (we do that), began, "I want to talk for a few minutes with the people of the United States about banking..." and "I want to tell you what has been done in the last few days, why it was done, and what the next steps are going to be." We treat people with intelligence and respect; this is their country. There could be a montage of New Deal programs, including the wonderful and very smart Home Owners' Loan Corp., where the Federal Government bought the mortgages of homeowners being killed by the payments, made the terms easier, and allowed people to pay them off. Over a million families were helped to keep their homes by this program, and all eventually paid them off. "One out of every five mortgaged nonfarm homes in the country benefited from the HOLC." (From the book "The Thirties: America and the Great Depression.")

I would contrast that with the almost unbelievable stupidity and arrogance of "Mission Accomplished," "heckuva job Brownie," something about the shot-in-the-face hunting trip with no legal consequences, etc., to build up a total impression of moral intelligence versus a despicable moneyed class run wild, and not giving a damn what they do to us. Make the point that we are suddenly, hated in the world where we were once universally well-thought-of, as you did, and that we the American people do not deserve this--that it was done equally to us--but that Bush and Republicans do; get rid of them. Then, show current Democrats of today, on the job, analyzing things intelligently and with conscience for the right, and proposing ways to instantly solve problems, if only they could. The recent report and recommendations by Representative Louise Slaughter on lobbying and criminality by the Republican Congress is a great example. Play at least one quick quote showing understanding of the problem, and show how we are the Party of intelligence, public service, and solutions. Tie all these things together historically as you have with examples, and it gives an inspiring total impression of us vs. them.

[PBass]

15. I think you have some good material here.

I'd like to see a more "pro-active" sounding tag line or "hook".

You could also use this "hated around the world" theme as one element in a more multi-faceted campaign too (bring in other topics like corruption and incompetence).

Lots to like, about what you've shown.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

19. wonderful, wonderful comments. Thank you, I can't wait until I

can digest all your points and regroup. You are SO right about the slogan - pictures can say most of it. Besides, when you use slogans they come back and bite you.

[Katherine Brengle]

16. This won't work---

Personally, I think it is a beautiful idea, but...

Remember Bush's "permission slip" analogy a couple of years ago?

Americans don't want to hear about the rest of the world and what they can do for us--Americans want to hear about what Democrats believe and what Democrats are going to do to make their lives better.

While I believe that it is important for the world to respect our nation, this will be a natural byproduct of electing Democrats to Congress and the Presidency.

I posted my idea for the new party slogan in a couple of places on DU last night and this afternnon--I think we need to keep it basic, invoke certain frames that make people feel comfortable and safe, and focus on what is going on inside our own country (rather than on, say, the war in Iraq, as we did in '04) in order to persuade voters.

This ad will turn off a lot of middle of the road viewers who have been bombarded with calculated right-wing attacks on the UN for the past 5 years. That is not what we need to do right now.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

20. Thanks, but I disagree. First of all, this would just be one ad

among others.

I think it would be effective because I know it would definitely work on me. Anyone who has lived in a time where we were respected longs for that time again. It is not about permission slips it is about restoring peace and respect.

[Katherine Brengle]

22. It works on you because you already agree with the premise--

that the opinion of the rest of the world matters (as do I).

It won't work on people who don't already believe this, which means it will be ineffective as a campaign ad.

I'm not trying to pick a fight, but this is exactly the kind of marketing we don't need--it doesn't work, and it's a waste of time and money.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

21. Also, your point

"While I believe that it is important for the world to respect our nation, this will be a natural byproduct of electing Democrats to Congress and the Presidency."

This ad would remind people of this !

[Katherine Brengle]

23. Clearly, you are more interested in cheerleading than in critique--

You asked for critiques--all I see are a bunch of people telling you how great this is and no one pointing out the logical flaw.

We've been harping on the "the rest of the world hates us because of a), b), and c)" thing for years--it isn't working. We need to give the American people something tangible to support--and the rest of the world loving us isn't a major concern for independents and moderate conservatives.

[Laura PourMeADrink]

26. Au contrare - but I happen to think, unlike you, that this type of ad

would be highly effective to a lot of people - especially those born before 1970, who remember when we were admired almost everywhere. Let's face it most people think the country is going in the wrong direction.

So, basically, if I follow your "critique", I would just scrap the whole idea. Not ready to do that, but thanks for the advice.

[Katherine Brengle]

28. I'm sorry if you take offense, I just don't want you to waste your time--

You clearly have some skill for designing ads that are emotionally compelling--I would just like to see that skill put to a use that would be productive.

Good luck with this one, honestly--I hope that it will work, I just don't think it will.

:shrug:

[Laura PourMeADrink]

29. guess we'll see - no offense taken, not at all.

[EFerrari]

33. I think you're right. Some people will also say --

"People think we're dangerous? Good! They'll think twice before attacking us!"


The hook needs to be: "Do we want a world full of enemies or a world of friends?"

[ContraBass Black]

24. That's good, at least to me.

A question, though. Do people who don't already agree with us stop listening when they see a flag burning?

[Laura PourMeADrink]

25. Interesting point. Maybe the ad should not have any negative

to it - just positive images of what America was like, especially under Democratic leadership. Leave out all the negative. Besides, someone could easily find an image of flags burning under Clinton..

[ContraBass Black]

27. I don't know about that.

If you're trying to reach people, the first question is whether or not you can make them care. Try finding somebody in your target audience.

The second question is whether or not they can dismiss you offhand.

[crispini]

31. Here's how I look at ads and ideas meant for the general public.

I think about a friend of mine who is not involved in politics at all and I think about how this would look through her eyes. Sometimes I show her stuff (websites, concepts) and ask what she thinks. I call this my "non-political junkie" gut test. I think it's a very common failing for all Democrats to assume that other people are just as involved or just as interested in the details as we are. They aren't, much as we hate that.

Anyway, so running your concept through my "gut test," my reaction is: Too many facts. All those facts. Tuning out . Maybe I get the message. The message is that: the world hates the U.S. Boy that's a downer. Do I agree? Not sure. But the end is telling us that we should vote Democratic. How will that help? What will change? What do they stand for.

Anyway. Don't take my word for it, go focus-group it with a few people from a non-political junkie office. You're not going to get much valid feedback here if your ad is intended for a general audience. There aren't any "general audience" people here. :D

[Laura PourMeADrink]

32. thanks for the input. I think that the way the dems would help

is by showing democratic presidents from the past so that the equation is democrats = more peaceful times. I am thinking about changing to remove all the negative flag=burning stuff.

Great idea about running it by an apolitical focus group.

thanks Crispini !

[JNelson6563]

34. Wow! Just Wow!

Great pics, great points. Bravo!!!

Julie