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gollygee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-03-08 03:31 PM
Original message
Women-only gyms
There's an interesting thread in GD about women-only gyms. A lot of people say that it's anti-feminist, although it's mainly men saying that I think. I like women-only gyms, and particularly did when I was younger, because I didn't like unwanted attention when I was working out. Is it a double standard to think women-only gyms are a good idea?

Also, there are a lot of Islamic women in my area and they need a women's only area because they can't be in gym gear in front of men. So even the co-ed gyms usually have a women's room that men aren't allowed in, and those rooms are very popular. I don't know if that's relevant or not.

I didn't want to post there just because I want to hear from other women, and particularly feminists, and not be told what the "feminist thing to do" is by men. That is an annoyance of mine.
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noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-03-08 06:48 PM
Response to Original message
1. I'm with you.
Any oppressed class of people deserves a break from being in an oppressive environment, whether that is women wanting a break from being objectified for an hour while they work out in peace, or women of color wanting a break out session at a women's conference. I think there was some fuss a while back over women of color wanting a sauna or something like that to themselves at the michigan womyn's festival. My feeling is that if a group with less privilege wants a break from being around those with more privilege, it's pretty ignorant for the group(s) with privilege to get offended by that.

A lot of men (and some women) act like it's anti-feminist to acknowledge being sexually objectified - like if we would just pretend it doesn't happen, the problem would be solved (blaming the victim).
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bliss_eternal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-04-08 01:32 AM
Response to Reply #1
5. Oh wow--
Edited on Thu Dec-04-08 01:38 AM by bliss_eternal
I hadn't heard of that situation (sauna/women of color). Sounds interesting. I wonder about the details and who was upset--dudes or other women?

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Lydia Leftcoast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-03-08 07:47 PM
Response to Original message
2. The first time I ever worked out, it was at a women-only gym in a small town
The reason was that the other gym in town was definitely a hostile atmosphere for women. The bodybuilder types would taunt the women they considered unattractive and proposition the ones they thought were attractive. Women who wore their clothes loose were "frumps" and women who wore their clothes tight were "teases."

The women-only gym was low-key and supportive, not at all competitive. The owner took a genuine interest in how well we were doing and pushed us along when we hesitated to move to the next level.

Later, when I moved to Portland, I joined a co-ed gym. By then I had more self-confidence, and the mix of people, downtown professionals and arts community types, knew enough to leave their sexism at the door. Some of the women there could have decked any man who got out of line. There was a lot of banter back and forth, but it felt friendly rather than hostile.

Now I'm at a YWCA, which despite its name, is coed. I haven't done any weightlifting here, although my body is telling me that I need to get back into that. However, since the Minneapolis YWCA's three core principles are empowering women, anti-racism, and child development, I don't anticipate any problems.

I'm grateful, though, that I had that opportunity to work out in a safe environment in a town where the local men could be awfully crude.

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ismnotwasm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-03-08 09:40 PM
Response to Original message
3. It's not anti-feminist
What part of gender history, social structure, not to mention rape culture-- past and present, do these people not get?

Some women not only don't feel safe, they aren't safe in many co-gender environments. Traumatized women or women who just don't feel like being hunted have very few options.


This is completely different from body image. Or even Culture, as in the case of Islamic women.

I work out regularly. I lift and do a bit of cardio. I'm assertive and getting old so I don't have to deal with as much bullshit. But I still have to deal with it. I still, and will always, have to watch myself, watch my safety, look over my shoulder. Out of long habit, I monitor my body language, don't meet people in the eye who may be encouraged to approach me simply because I'm female and alone. In this way, I take on most of the responsibility of of that type of social interaction. Used to it. And I think many women do this, without understanding that they do it, or why. For some, that could be very stressful. For some uncomfortable. For some, traumatic.

Some, perhaps, enjoy male/female (or whatever) interaction that can be as innocent as flirtation, or the beginning of relationships with a shared interest.

Personally, I wouldn't use a female only gym. And just as personally I understand the reasons to have them. It's in no way a double standard and only someone immersed in, or buying into, male entitlement would think so.

Even my husband tends to be protective in that sort of hypermascualinized arena, as irritating as that is to me, I understand why.
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bliss_eternal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-03-08 10:47 PM
Response to Original message
4. I don't understand...
...why men so frequently feel the need to tell us what, "feminism" is, isn't or should be. What the hell is that, exactly?

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gollygee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-04-08 10:45 AM
Response to Reply #4
6. I hate it, but I imagine
they want to define feminism in a way that works for them. If they can get us to believe it's in our best interest to work out where we're ogled, and it's in our best interest to work as strippers and prostitutes and be in porn, then they win.
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blueraven95 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Dec-04-08 12:32 PM
Response to Original message
7. I think it depends on what purpose the gym is for
if it's for the obvious purpose, exercising, then I fully support women-only gyms. I know that I personally hate going to the gym, simply because I feel like everyone's watching me. While intellectually I know this isn't true, I also know I'd feel a lot more comfortable (although, probably not fully comfortable) in a women-only gym. If the idea of a gym is to be a place that gives opportunity, encouragement, and support people who might otherwise not be motivated to get in shape, then I cannot see how a gender-segregated gym is a bad idea. I also think a female-only gym is uniquely able to give support to women, particularly because often women are not taught the best methods for getting and staying in shape.

However, as one poster in the other thread pointed out, if gyms are networking places, then a gender-segregated gym system is very quickly going to turn into a problem for women. History suggests that generally segregated organizations very quickly turn into a way for the powerful to hold onto their power and subjugate those not in power. In this case it would probably result in obviously ways, like better equipment in the male-only gyms, and in less obvious ways, like big deals being brokered in the men's bar and lounge areas. I don't think this is something that feminists want to promote, even indirectly.

I think it's a bit of a catch-22 situation, personally, and I'm not sure there are any obvious fixes. Possibly the gyms that have a male section and a female section, and possibly a co-ed section, but the lounge and bar area are completely desegregated. Just a thought.
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Captain Hilts Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-05-08 05:34 PM
Response to Original message
8. It doesn't matter. Gyms are private. People aren't forced to join.
You wonder why they feel so touchy about the subject.
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ThomCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-05-08 07:28 PM
Response to Original message
9. People have every right to exercise privately.
So women-only gyms are perfectly acceptable. Exercising is not a public activity. Guys do not have a right to be there. They don't have a right to watch.

If any right they think they've got with regard to women is so reasonable, then I'll immediately clam it with regard to my gay self while they're working out. :)

We'll see if they think that right is so reasonable then. I'll be they suddenly think privacy is important.
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ismnotwasm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Dec-08-08 07:41 PM
Response to Reply #9
13. LOL
Edited on Mon Dec-08-08 07:42 PM by ismnotwasm
Hey, good to hear from you Thomcat, and you hit it right there.

Too bad homophobia leads to violence, especially in types who have a chokingly restrictive idea of what "masculinity" is, otherwise I'd say lets do a, uh, let's call it a social experiment.

One of the 24 hour fitness in my city is known for it's Gay male clientele, and I know women who go there to feel safer.

Sad world we live in isn't it? Admiring female beauty --almost by definition-- is to objectify for far too many males, and yet to be on the receiving end of that male admiration is anathema.

Hmmm.


Oh edit, how're you doing? I know you were ill and in pain, I hope you feel better. All my best wishes to you this holiday season, and all other times as well.




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ThomCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-12-08 06:43 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. I probably had a stroke.
The doctors are still trying to figure out what happened, but I have all the symptoms. So I'm now out of work applying for disability and public assistance. It's a strange and difficult new life. But it's hopefully going to work out.

:shrug:

Once things settle down and I get more control of whatever is happening to me I will be posting more regularly again. :)
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-05-08 10:00 PM
Response to Original message
10. Not a double standard. It might be a double standard, if say, sexism, misogyny and violence against
women were a thing of the past, or not promoted disproportionately by the men in our society, but...that's not the case (no matter what the ignorant misogynists at DU might believe).
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lizerdbits Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-06-08 10:13 PM
Response to Original message
11. I don't think it is at all
Edited on Sat Dec-06-08 10:14 PM by lizerdbits
I know some women who have had a 'meat market' experience with gyms though I personally haven't. If I lived in a really hostile area I'd definitely be at a womens only gym. All the gyms I've been too are co-ed and I've not really had any problems. Now if I were small and the cultural definition of "hot/attractive" then maybe it would be different. Before reading the replies I didn't think about situations where women who have been traumatized would not want to work out in front of men.

Once I did have a guy tell me I should do different abdominal exercises "to get a smaller waist, since that's what you want." I told him I didn't care and he looked puzzled and asked "Are you sure?" I said "Yes" while laughing at him. My ideal response would be "I'll try to give a rats fucking ass what you think about my appearance and then consider your idea" but I didn't want to get attacked in the parking lot.
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Ellen Forradalom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-07-08 10:41 PM
Response to Original message
12. I belonged to the Women's Gym in Chicago during the 80s
I really enjoyed the atmosphere of a club that served the fitness and social needs of women and the community needs of lesbians in particular.

One of the owners passed on and her surviving partner transformed the business into Thousand Waves karate school.

I have experienced not the least discomfort in co-ed gyms but the Women's Gym was special
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