Let's make a fake Virgin Mary outside a Walmart

[Ian David]

If anyone has ideas for execution, please let me know.

The idea is to create a traffic-clogging throng of "pilgrims" that cripple a Walmart by impeding access to the store and the parking lot.

See:
Some see Virgin Mary in underpass stain

CHICAGO, Illinois (AP) -- A steady stream of the faithful and the curious, many carrying flowers and candles, have flocked to an expressway underpass for a view of a yellow and white stain on a concrete wall that some believe is an image of the Virgin Mary.

Police have patrolled the emergency turnoff area under the Kennedy Expressway since Monday as hundreds of people have walked down to see the image and the growing memorial of flowers and candles that surround it. Beside the image is an artist's rendering of the Virgin Mary embracing Pope John Paul II in a pose some see echoed in the stain.

<snip>

Tuesday morning, women knelt with rosary beads behind a police barricade while men in work shirts stood solemnly before the image, praying. A police officer kept the crowd of about three dozen from getting too close to the traffic but didn't stop them gathering around the stain.

<snip>

Among the best-known in the United States was an image seen in office windows in Clearwater, Florida. Within weeks, a half million people had been to the site. Glass experts believe the image was created by a chemical reaction and corrosion of the metallic elements in the glass coating, but they could not explain why it took the shape it did. The windows were broken last year.

More:
http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/04/20/mary.underpass.ap/

[Sandpiper]

1. I love the new Our Lady of the Urine Stain

Definitely goes to show that people will see what they want to see.

[mitchtv]

2. muriatic acid?

a little food coloring /ink

[Speck Tater]

3. Install some nozzles

that work like an ink jet printer on the underside of your car and hook them up to a computer. The pull into a parking spot near the door and spray paint a virgin mary picture in crancase oil and axle grease right underneath your car. Then back the car out of the parking space, stop it in the middle of the aisle so nobody can pull in and smear the picture. Jump out of your car and start shouting for everyone to come and see the miraculous virgin mary in the oil stain. Wait 10 minutes for the fools to rush in and then drive away. Mission accomplished.

[Ian David]

6. Hmm... it could be even easier

Just a cardboard stencil and a spray can full of some kind of oil or grease.

Still, it would be better (I think) if it were someplace protected from the elements.

The miracle would be short-lived if it washed away in the rain.

How hard would it be to use a heat source of some kind to quickly "burn" a Virgin into the pavement using a stencil?

Something like a giant hot-air blower and a stencil made of an insulating material. Just hot enough to slightly melt the pavement? Maybe throw some kind of pigment or glaze into the semi-molten surface?

[ozymandius]

4. just tape a picture to the door

Someone will proclaim that the Divine "cut to the chase".

[Mist]

5. Another idea: Virgin Marys for the jobless!

What with the job market tanking, people can do Virgin Mary stains on their property and charge to see them. I like the Wal-Mart idea, really has promise! Unfortunately, the Wal-Mart here is part of a shopping center, and a number of businesses would be hurt by "pilgrimages."

[CitySky]

7. hmm, I think it could backfire

The people who come to worship the stain are the exact same people who would think it a good idea to stop by W*Mart for a cooler, some soda, ice, a lawn chair, candles, and a disposable camera on their way there. No dice.