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Am I the only one who finds this review creepy?

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Lyric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:05 PM
Original message
Am I the only one who finds this review creepy?
The review is for a 3-stone ring that looks like this, and can be personalized with whatever stones you wish:



Here's the review:

"My husband and I chose this ring for him to give to our teenage daughter as a "purity commitment/promise" ring. We had it engraved with "I choose *** To wait" We had a diamond set in the center, symbolizing her purity - then a sapphire set on either side, representing "daddy's eyes watching over her" to preserve her purity for the man that comes one day to him to ask for her hand in marriage. He will then give him the okay to move 'daddy's ring' to her right hand, and put his engagement ring on her.
He plans to take her out to an elegant restaurant for dinner the weekend before she goes off to high school (in a couple weeks). He will give her her first dozen roses, and treat her like a lady, as an example of how men should respect and honor her. He will chat with her about how valuable and precious she is, and how to keep herself that way. Then he will put the ring on her finger. I know she will CRY!!! She's very close to her daddy anyway, and we women are "melt-aways" at such tenderness!!!
Thanks for such a perfect ring - I had searched many months till I found this one! LOVE IT!!"


---------------

"Daddy's eyes watching over her?"

:scared:
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Tektonik Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:07 PM
Response to Original message
1. Daddy's eyes watching over her?
Sure as he molests her. :puke:
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Sky Masterson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:19 PM
Response to Reply #1
10. That got me too.
What next? Is he going to De-flower her. :wtf:
That is some sick twisted shit
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lost-in-nj Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:09 PM
Response to Original message
2. ....
:scared:

:puke:

poor girl



lost
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Lyric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:11 PM
Response to Reply #2
5. Indeed. And the boyfriend is actually expected to *ask* for her hand?
As if she isn't capable of deciding for herself?

Daddy sure seems to have every single detail of this planned out in advance. I wonder if he's planned out the wedding night, too? That poor kid.

:scared:
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:24 PM
Response to Reply #5
14. And then Daddy will give permission for Future Man to move the daddy ring to her right hand
and place his engagement ring on her left hand.

Sounds an awful lot like a business transaction to me: Daddy "selling" little girl to her future husband.
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Jamastiene Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 03:28 PM
Response to Reply #14
32. Those people still see women as property.
That's so fucking deranged.
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lunatica Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:31 PM
Response to Reply #5
18. It's more like the Mommy is talking here
Edited on Sun Feb-15-09 01:32 PM by lunatica
And that's even more creepy than Daddy's role. Reminds me of the Handmaiden's Tale where the wife holds down the handmaiden while the husband rapes her so they can keep the child as their own.

Mommy picks out the ring. Mommy keeps the ritual going, etc. It also reminds me of female genital mutilation where the mommy is the one who teaches her daughters what a privileged and 'special' right of passage this is.
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Lyric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:34 PM
Response to Reply #18
20. I was thinking "Mommy brainwashed by domineering Daddy"
but either way, it's creepy and offensive and just ICK.

I can't believe people DO this sort of thing to their kids. Good grief. The humiliation of being told, IN PUBLIC, "Sweetheart, your virginal value is incredibly high, so don't go losing that hymen, or you won't be worth a damned thing. Daddy is watching over you."

:puke:
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lunatica Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:41 PM
Response to Reply #20
21. I agree with you. I wasn't being critical, just adding
my 2 sense worth (play on words there.)
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Danger Mouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:09 PM
Response to Original message
3. I've heard of this process among evangelicals.
It's pure misogyny, but with a creepy subtext to it.
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Fire Walk With Me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:10 PM
Response to Original message
4. Force is a way of life.
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nytemare Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:13 PM
Response to Original message
6. Do you have a link for that?
The folks over at Richarddawkins.net will have a field day with this.

And, it is very creepy.
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Lyric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:16 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. Yep--here ya go:
Edited on Sun Feb-15-09 01:17 PM by Lyric
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nytemare Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 02:15 PM
Response to Reply #8
28. Thanks, should be interesting.
That review made me feel slightly sick in my stomach.
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Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:14 PM
Response to Original message
7. I find it creepiest that these girls are supposed to stay 'pure' for 'daddy'
The implication is just... just... :puke: :grr:



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Lyric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:24 PM
Response to Reply #7
15. Oh yeah. I'm thinking the same thing.
In *my* world, other than acting in a guiding/teaching capacity, parents should be as far away from their kids' sex lives as humanly possible.

Plus, I just find the whole idea of "purity" to be fucking creepy. Sex does not make one "impure;" neither does it decrease the "value" of a woman/girl, as this seems to imply. Just...ick.

I intend to tell MY son (and any future sons/daughters) that I *want* them to have sex before marriage. I want them to know for sure that they are compatible in that way before making a promise that is hella expensive to make, and even MORE expensive to break. I can't imagine the horror of only finding out that your sex life is going to be intolerable AFTER you've already made that promise.

:scared:
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:28 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. ....
Sex does not make one "impure;" neither does it decrease the "value" of a woman/girl, as this seems to imply.

That's almost exactly what I said to my husband after I had him read that review. He finds it incredibly disturbing also.
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yellowdogintexas Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 02:09 PM
Response to Reply #7
27. the staying 'pure' should just be for its own sake. For her own self esteem
and so on.

Now if my husband did that, he would address totally the idea that a woman's self worth is contained in herself and that she should not value herself on whether or not she has a man in her life at all, much less one she has to pledge to daddy that she won't sleep with until marriage.

HIS ring would be a reminder that she is a person of competence, brains, and the sense to make good decisions for herself.

If he even did that which he didn't and wouldn't .... but he was a great counselor to her in many other ways, and still is.
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petronius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:17 PM
Response to Original message
9. That strikes me as extremely creepy
The "going away" to HS bit is either good or really bad - it could be a chance to get out from under, or she could be being sent to some super-creepy jesus camp boarding school.

(I know I used "creepy" twice, but it's too early in the am to come up with an appropriate synonym... :))
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Chorophyll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:22 PM
Response to Original message
11. Gah.
Funda-pev-a-gelicals.

:scared:
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:22 PM
Response to Original message
12. Now, this man that someday comes along...where was his purity pledge?
Will any man asking dad for his daughter's hand in marriage going to pass muster and be as virginal as his daughter...or is there a double standard?

That isn't really "choosing" to wait. Dad is going to take her out, appear to be a pedophile to every person in the restaurant, and force her to promise to something she shouldn't have to. Her body, her choice.

Creepy doesn't begin to describe it.

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Lyric Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:30 PM
Response to Reply #12
17. Bingo.
The whole "waiting for marriage" thing is useless unless as a tool for preventing disease unless the boyos are held to precisely the same standards as the girls. Imagine the horror of being a 21-year-old young lady who "waited" for marriage, only to find out that your new husband *didn't*, and now you have HPV/Chlamydia/etc. Or worse--that your new husband has violent sexual tendencies that you had no clue about before the marriage.

It's creepy enough to be THAT concerned with your daughter's sex life, but even if there's no bad intent on the part of Daddy, it's STILL utterly destructive for the victimized daughters, IMHO. Too damned much risk.

If "Daddy" really wants to protect her, he'll scrap the purity bullshit and tell her to talk frankly about sex with the potential husband beforehand, and ask for the STD test results before signing on the dotted line.
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Lucian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:47 PM
Response to Reply #12
23. Agreed.
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:23 PM
Response to Original message
13. Yes. It's creepy, disgusting, and offensive.
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GOPisEvil Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:34 PM
Response to Original message
19. What the fuck?!
Creepy? How about pedophilic?
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ldf Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:42 PM
Response to Original message
22. three questions...
1. was "daddy" a virgin when he got married?

2. was "momma"?

3. does "daddy" also expect his son, should he have one, to ALSO be a virgin when HE gets married?

all this hypocritical crap makes me sick.

:puke:

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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 01:54 PM
Response to Reply #22
24. Another question: What if she's gay?
AND doesn't live in a state where gays have marriage rights? I think that just might kill the guy.
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HarukaTheTrophyWife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 02:03 PM
Response to Reply #24
26. Let's face it, people who do that creepy purity ball shit would never approve of their gay daughter
Sad, but true.
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buzzycrumbhunger Donating Member (793 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 02:00 PM
Response to Original message
25. Don't worry--there's an out for the "pure"
I'm curious to know what happens when the VD rates amongst these "abstinent" teens skyrockets because they're convincing themselves oral and anal are safe alternatives. I give you the newest rage:

Saddlebacking: sad•dle•back•ing \ˈsa-dəl-ˈba-kiŋ\ vb (2009): the phenomenon of Christian teens engaging in unprotected anal sex in order to preserve their virginities

After attending the Purity Ball, Heather and Bill saddlebacked all night because she’s saving herself for marriage. Unfortunately her parents found out because they got santorum all over the sheets.

And yes, the whole thing is creepy. :P
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AlCzervik Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 02:19 PM
Response to Original message
29. Daddy's watching you.
is he enjoying it?

narsty.
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MineralMan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 02:42 PM
Response to Original message
30. Ick! Just Ick!
If the girl has any spunk at all, she'll do as she pleases, anyhow. Poor daddy! He hasn't learned yet that his children grow up to have minds of their own.
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Jamastiene Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-15-09 02:49 PM
Response to Original message
31. I'll go ahead and say it.
That's downright perverted...in a bad way.
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