Do you ever feel guilty because you have more than some people?

[raccoon]

I do. Sometimes I feel guilty for having more than poor people. I'm not wealthy, by the way, I'm "middle-class" like the majority of Americans say they are :silly:.

I went on a mission trip to Honduras last year and we worked in poor communities. These people had tiny houses with dirt floors that would be considered a poor excuse for a toolshed here. They didn't have running water. THey had cisterns. Most of them I think had electricity which was at least part of the time hooked up illegally.

Our group had dental clinics (and other clinics) for them. Mostly we did extractions, but some fillings and cleanings. They had a pain shot, but we couldn't take time for the jaw to get numb as we do here. Yet I never heard anyone carrying on about that, which I, and I imagine many Americans, would.

Last night I had an attack of guilt about such dire poverty. I got out of the guilt, but I ask myself, What is that REALLY about? Why am I really feeling guilty about this?

[mainegreen]

1. Empathy.

[stuntcat]

2. I remember it at restaurants the most.

When I eat out I think of it. My husband and I are to cheap to eat out, like ever, but his family takes us out sometimes. Whenever I go to nice restaurants I can't not realize how much food is being thrown out every day. I always order small dishes so I won't waste anything. Once I even made a comment at the table that people somewhere are starving (and normally I'm real quiet) and the answer was "Well, not at this table!" :eyes:

I don't want to sound all high-horsey about this but people in the US who think they're poor are rich compared to most of the world. This is a article I got yesterday from my (radical :eyes:) environmental group-
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080130/ap_on_re_la_am_ca/haiti_eating_dirt
There's a video too, it's hard to believe.

[raccoon]

3. That is awful. I said to a man on the Honduras trip, "What these people need is regime change."

But a machete isn't much use against an AK-47. :shrug:

Edited for clarity.

[vi5]

4. I'd only feel guilty about not having empathy...

I don't feel guilty for what I have or my family has. They came from extremely humble beginnings and both my parents grew up comparatively poor and worked very hard to get to a point of financial success. But they have always acted with a sense of empathy and no matter what they were able to afford to do for or give my brother and I they made sure that we always had that empathy and always understood that in addition to just the hard work and sacrifice that it took for all of us to get to where we are from where my grandparents were less than 50 years ago, that it also included a hefty portion of luck and timing as well. They taught us to give back to our communities and to give to others rather than to hoarde or be greedy and spend on wasteful, frivolous, trendy, and exclusively materialistic things. We don't want for anything and we don't go without just to prove a point or not treat ourselves to things on occassions. But more than anything in the world it's about giving back and it's about having that empathy. And I try to instill that in my daughter and son as well.

It also helps that we all live in the same towns that my parents grew up in rather than moving elsewhere to more affluent towns even though we could all afford to. We all support local businesses and give to local charities and share what we have as much as possible not only in terms of money but in terms of the opportunities we can help provide.

I think the main difference is not so much in feeling guilty but in being sure that you never lose that awareness and never take any of it for granted.

[stuntcat]

6. yah

We don't have to feel guilty.. unless we're totally unaware-then we'd deserve a little guilt, but then we wouldn't feel any either.

[vi5]

7. My bottom line is...

I won't expect my children to be Ghandi, but I also won't allow them to be Paris Hilton either (not that we're financially even in that stratosphere, but it's more just by nature of the shallow vacuousness that her money has allowed her to be).

[DS1]

5. I feel bad for them

like when you pull into a gas station to grab a gatorade and you see an old station wagon full of stuff and most of a family.

[knitter4democracy]

8. I do. I think, in some ways, I still have reverse culture shock from trips.

I went on several mission trips in college (cheap way to see the world), and I was always amazed at how much people shared with us, worried about the weak Americans who weren't used to suffering. It still hurts sometimes, and that's when I clean out the house again, figuring I don't need my clothes as much as someone else does at Goodwill for a much cheaper price for work or whatever.

[azmouse]

9. Sometimes.

But I always try to be grateful for what I've got and help those that aren't as fortunate.

[1gobluedem]

10. Yes

Right now my guilt stems from having two hale and hearty parents; I have three co-workers whose mothers or mothers-in-law died this month and the mother of a very close friend is currently battling leukemia, her latest round of chemo failed and her prognosis is not good)

Even though my family has had their share of health problems (father is a two time cancer survivor, mother had pneumonia last year) they are very healthy and vibrant right now and looking forward to the birth of their first grandchild this summer. Seeing my friend suffer with her mother and knowing what's inevitable makes me feel very guilty for having healthy, whole parents.

[quip]

11. Do not feel guilty. I believe it is a form of narcissism

The proper attitude, IMO, is GRATITUDE for what you have. Be thankful, and let your gratitude manifest itself in helping others who are less fortunate than you are. :hi:

[GirlinContempt]

12. Yeah. Every day.

I've been in favellas, seen 'houses' made of literal garbage, people ACTUALLY starving to death, rooting through garbage heaps for scraps, etc.

My guilt isn't so much about what I have, but HOW I have what I have. I can't justify it that I'm a hard worker, or my family works hard, because so do those people. Why do I deserve more when it's at the expense of someone else? Because I try to be honest with myself and it is at the expense of others. Almost everything I own has come from the utter poverty of others. And it's horribly, disgustingly wrong.

We all have blood on our hands, and all of the hard work, buying local where possible and small numbers of ethical products can't wash it off.

[Midlodemocrat]

13. I'm not sure if guilty is the right word.

I have a pretty good job. So does Mr.Midlo. We live nicely and his salary allows me to donate most if not all of mine to causes I support.

It's kind of a win, win for me. I enjoy working because of the people I've met and the causes I've worked for, I'm contributing to my family's financial health, and I get to be philanthropic, which is something I have always wanted to do.

My position is flexible enough to allow me to volunteer which is also something I couldn't NOT do.

I guess my point is, if I didn't have the job and the income I do, I wouldn't be able to help in the manner which I do. So I guess the answer is no. I don't feel guilty.