I Only Have A Minute, And Will Post Something More Later. But There's Something I Need To Share.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

Today is a really hectic day, as you all can imagine, and I only have about a minute in which to write this. But something happened this morning that has given me chills all day and is still stunning my brain in ways I can't describe. While I had a quick two minutes, I wanted to share this story. I will try and post something more about everything later tonight, when I have the time, strength and stability. But for now, I want to share this:

My son, Justin, who will be 4 in November, has been kept in the loop as to what's been going on for the most part. Generally, he just knows that mommy is sick and has been in the hospital. Even last night, when I said goodnight to him on the phone, he was still talking about mommy in the hospital. He was fast asleep last night when she passed, and there were no phone calls he heard, no hugs of grieving he saw, NO indication whatsoever to him that she passed away last night.

Yet this morning, the most eerie and perplexing conversation I've ever had in my life took place. He woke up and called into the monitor "daddy, daddy" as he always does to let me know he's awake. I was on the computer at the time sending out emails to friends who do not yet know. I yelled upstairs "Justin, I'm here, you can come down now" and he came downstairs. Now I swear to all of you with every ounce of my being, that the following is word for word what took place.

He came downstairs, sat on the couch, and with such conviction and joy (not sorrow) he all of a sudden says "Daddy, mommy's not in the hospital anymore right? She's in my head now". My jaw dropped stunned to the floor. I looked right at him and said "Justin, how did you know that?, Did you have a dream?" and he said "God was in my dream". I said "What about mommy?" and he said "no, not mommy. Mommy said good morning to me".

I broke down and cried hard. I didn't know what to think or feel, and a huge chill overcame me. How the hell did he know? There was NO WAY he could've known. For weeks he's known she's there and each day talks about her being sick in the hospital. Yet all of a sudden this morning out of nowhere, first thing out of his mouth, with no way whatsoever he'd know, he says "Mommy's not in the hospital anymore, right? She's in my head now".

Strangest conversation I've ever been part of. It has been shaking me all day. It was like this overwhelming confirmation that she is still with us, and most importantly with them. I do have a spiritual faith but this was so much more powerful than just my own typical cliche thoughts of "I know she'll always be with us, looking down on us". This was so much more. It was like some weird and unexplainable proof that she is with them. I can't even express how strange it was hearing him. But I wanted to share this, because I'm so perplexed by it in it's own way. Afterwards, I ran upstairs and immediately wrote the entire conversation down word for word on the fridge, so that I never misstate it or forget what was said. As I write this, I'm still stunned. But I wanted to share it.

I gotta run, as there is so much to do. Her father will be here soon and we will be going to funeral homes. I can't wait for that whole part to be over with. But I'm hoping later, or tomorrow, I will have time to post my deeper feelings about all of this, and post more of a personal thanks to you all.

For now, God bless and my deepest thanks. I'll talk to you all later.

[SacredCow]

1. She will always be with you and her boys....

Touching beyond measure.....

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. My dear OMC!

Wow, what an incredibly moving story!

It brought chills to me, and tears as well...

Children are closer to their spiritual selves than we adults are, I believe...

And your little son just demonstrated that, so damn powerfully!

Blessings on you all......

She is still there with you, indeed!

:hug:

[LibraLiz1973]

54. I agree with Peggy

children are much closer to the spiritual side of themselves because they haven't been "tainted" (for lack of a better word) yet.

She is still here with you!!

[Critters2]

85. It seems to be true.

I awoke in the middle of the night, called to my parents and told them that my grandfather had died--two hours before they got the call. I was 9 at the time. Kids know these things somehow.

[redqueen]

3. Thanks for sharing that...

Glad she paid him a visit before leaving. :)

[Maestro]

4. I'm not the most religious person,

however, I have no idea what happens at death so I'd take comfort in this. If there is an afterlife, it looks like Stacey passed by to say hello to Justin. All will be fine OMC. It will take a long time, but all will be fine. Strength and perseverance will get you through this and the love of your children and family.

[fizzgig]

5. the universe works in such amazing ways

:hug:

[Sequoia]

6. Very amazing, but totally believe you.

So sorry about your loss.

[helderheid]

7. I'm teary and trying to hide it from my boss - OMC thank you for sharing this

:hug:

[applegrove]

8. When your body knew that she was probably going to pass - your body

and soul probably communicated that to the little guy. And his brain took over and sent him the message - to prepare him. That is how I see it anyway.

I'm so sorry for your family. I'm so sorry for the kids. I'm glad you have lots of support and gladder still your wife had someone who loved her so much there the whole time. As i always say: she's not gone, your relationship to her has just changed one more time.

Bless you all.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

9. I believe everything that you just typed ...

because like CaliforniaPeggy said children are more in tune with that side.And some adults never lose it.

I believe it because after my cousin's mom was killed in a car accident in November 1999,I was grieving really hard. I was in pain. The only thing that brought me comfort was writing songs.I would write them while for work to get busy when I worked at the newspaper during a 3rd shift job.I would always sit at the table and just write and write.

But one night when I was sleep I dreamed that I was sitting at the table and I turned around and there was my cousin's mom and I got up and I hugged her.I felt as if in some way I could move on.She is still in my heart.

[MrCoffee]

10. she is absolutely with them, and with you, OMC

peace and comfort to you and the boys.

[Bullwinkle925]

11. There is much more to this *life* of ours than we know. . .

I know the day my Mother passed on - I had a very strong sensation of air moving past me and a definite sense of her aroma around me - and I was 2,000 miles away.
Yes, I believe your wife's presence is with all of you and will always be with you.
I hope you will be able to gather all the strength within you right now to get through the next few days. Please take care of yourself as well.
Hugs
BW925

[Sanity Claws]

12. Amazing story

I hope it brings you and your sons comfort. Yes, she is still with you.

[johnnie]

13. Thanks for sharing this

It does happen and there is no reason for me not to believe you. Take care

[texas1928]

14. I am so sorry for your lose...

This reminds me of when my Grandfather died. It was about 2:30 in the morning. And I was woken up by a voice saying goodbye. I woke up and just knew grandpa had died. My sister who was in college at Baylor (200 Miles away) was woken at the same time by the same voice. She called Mom and Dad and asked. It was just the same way. I beleive in spirits and ghosts. When I was hurt at 16, I told my dad while I was still under sedation that grandpa was standing at the end of the bed. He went down and stood next to him. I told him grandpa had been there watching over me and smiling. I don't remember any of this, but I wish I could, I was really close to my grandpa.

[Blue Diadem]

15. Oh OMC, what a touching image. Like others here have said, children are much more sensitive

to those types of things than adults. I've heard all of us are born with the sense but fail to develop it.

:hug:

[MorningGlow]

16. Of course lovely Stacey visited her boys

What a wonderful story, OMC. As a witch, I truly believe that the essence of a person who has departed can visit us anytime they want, especially when they are making the transition to the Other World. (My grandmother visited my mother in a dream the night she died to tell her she was fine now. Have had many other similar experiences as well.)

Take comfort in the fact that Stacey is now watching over you and your boys and protecting and guiding you for the rest of your lives. :hug:

[krispos42]

17. Wow...

Uber-freaky!

I got chills, like I did at the end of "1408".

Oh, and let me take this time to express my sorrow. I haven't had a chance to say it in any other posts yet. :hugs:

[Bennyboy]

18. Wow, Just wow......

[Dora]

19. Love knows no edges, no boundaries.

Blessings to you in your time of unfathomable loss.

[Debbi801]

20. So beautiful. I have chills.

:grouphug: for you and your kids.

Debbi

[Marrah_G]

21. The bond between mother and child is a forever bond

I am not sure what your beliefs are but mine would say that your wife will stick around and watch over you all until she knows you are going to be okay. Encourage your child to talk about it.

We experienced some strange things after my godson died at age 4 (or rather his parents did and sometimes we would be there). Once his parents worked through the toughest parts the odd things stopped.

:loveya:

Marrah

[Beaverhausen]

22. I have heard many stories of those who are passing visiting their loved ones

one last time as they pass. Your post doesn't surprise me. I'm so sorry for your loss. I think you can take some comfort knowing Stacey visited your son and said goodbye in her own way.

[Cleita]

23. Children are very psychic.

In my family, members who have passed have visited the small children in spirit right after they died.

[Jeanette in FL]

24. This account reaffirms my beliefs

I, too believe that children are much more receptive to our spiritual being than adults are. They haven't been taught not to believe or to fear. I know that Justin saw and heard his Mommy say good morning to him. There is no doubt.

For the past six months, my two grandsons have been carrying on conversations with someone. They double over in laughter and point to the corner of the room as if to say "Can't you see this, can't you hear this". For the past month, they have been calling him "Pop-pop". "Pop-pop" was the name my son (their father) called my father (his grandfather). He died the year before either of them were born. Now my son never refers to his grandfather as Pop-pop when discussing him, he will always say grandpa. The boys have never heard anyone refer to him as pop-pop. So where did they get that from? I know that I have to believe that my Dad is here and is experiencing them. It is comforting to know.

I am so glad you shared that story and I sure hope no one takes that away from your boys.

[Zephyrbird]

25. Dear OMC, so sorry.

I came back to DU too late to know her, and I truly regret that. Everyone here shows so much love for both of you, I knew she was unbelievably special.

The next few days are the toughest, friend, but you take them one at a time. You get through the first hour, the first day, the first week.

Yes, I firmly believe she visited your son. There's no doubt. Love calls across vast distances and unfathomable chasms to comfort and reassure us.

Zeph

[Ryano42]

26. Shortly after my brother was killed, my Mom received

a visitor. The night before the funeral she of course could not sleep and she saw the figure of someone outside her bedroom door.

She said it was silent, wore a flannel shirt (she saw a part of a shoulder) and it moved slowly down the hall to my bedroom. She got up and thought I was walking around only to find me asleep along with everyone else in that crowded, silent house.

Since my brother and I were of similar build, she then realized it was Jim...saying goodbye for now and making sure we were all ok. :)

She was completely sure of what she saw. All I know is I had a tape in my car which had the guitar instumental "Cavatina" from the Deer Hunter on it. All that week I listened to it and cried and cried...I couldn't stop. After that night the tape was gone and I never found it though I sold the car later and went completely through it.

They try if theyy can in some way to comfort you all left behind. We must try not to grieve too much and CELEBRATE them...and live.

Miss you Jim. Miss you Mom. My heart to you OMC....

:hug:

[OzarkDem]

27. You know she is with them

If it were me, if it were in my power, I would try to be with my children. These are life's mysteries. We don't know the answers, but its an integral part of our faith.

[stellanoir]

28. Even some psychologists have noticed that most kids under the age of 7

are far better understanding, and more balanced in their acceptance of the cycles of life and death and rebirth, perhaps because their transition into form has been more recent. They often tend to blame themselves less than ones who are ages that are multiples of 7.

I'm sure she will guide you and your kids for as long as you guys maintain your receptivity which I hope you always will.

If anyone or several of us can help you in any way, please don't ever hesitate to ask.

I happened to view your wedding video long before I knew she was ill and I must say, I've rarely seen a more devoted or loving groom or a more enamoured bride. That has been so evident in all your posts during this crisis.

:grouphug:

Be as strong as you can for now my friend and know our support is with you and our shoulders will be here for you later and as always.

Condolences and Great Love to you and yours.

[BarenakedLady]

29. ...

:hug:

[Maiden England]

30. When I was a child, I experienced the same thing

My Great Aunt, to whom I was very close was in the hospital. I was very young, about 5 or 6. I remember visiting her in hospital, and she didn't seem sick at all, and I don't remember that my parents or my Grandma (her sister) letting on about how sick she really was. She had no children of her own and she always doted on me.
Then one day, I was being looked after by my Dad while Mum and Grandma were at the hospital, and I just knew she had passed. It was like I had felt her presence come and say goodbye to me, and I wasn't sad, or scared, but comforted. I remember it being such a strong experience, not vague or dreamlike, but powerful and comforting. I told my Dad something about it. When Mum and Grandma came home from the hospital I remember them talking about what I'd said, and figured out it was at the same time my Aunt had passed. I remember it all as clear as day, even though I was so young at the time.

I never quite had the same experience again, but when my cousin to whom I was incredibly close died, I was in college, about 23, and I just knew she had passed also. I was cold, and I couldn't get warm, for hours. When my Mum called the next day to tell she had passed I knew. I did know that she was very ill though. A few years ago my Grandma, who was in her late 90's, had Alzheimer's died. I remember dreaming about her a few days before she died. I don't really remember it, apart from that it was a positive dream. I never dreamed about her before, or since. Again a few days later I had that being really cold experience like when my cousin died, and was not surprised at all when my Mum called the next day to let me know my Grandma has passed. I always felt that I was able to have these experiences because of what I'd experienced when my Great Aunt died, so I remained receptive to whatever kind of connection it is. I really don't know what I believe as far as religion goes. I am Jewish, and I've waxed and waned on faith a lot in the past few years. I also don't think I'm able to believe that if there is a God, s/he would recognize faith as anything other than a tool to help people find a morality to live by. I'm not sure what my experience means the the framework of a religious nature of an afterlife, other than there is definitely a connection between souls, that goes way beyond any physical parameters.

I really think children are so pure of heart they are open and receptive to all kinds of spiritual forces and connections that as adults we are not able to see or be aware of. I hope your son remembers his experience, as mine has brought me comfort all my life that somehow the souls we love so deeply that have 'passed on' are still in touch with us somehow and someday we'll be reunited.

[lovuian]

96. Thats beautiful and Thanks for Sharing Children are intuitive

I believe in angels and the spirit world
The comforting thing to always remember is
We are not alone

[Maribelle]

102. from: My Butterfly

And there were other things:
It seemed God let thee flutter from his gentle clasp:
Then fearful he had let thee win
Too far beyond him to be gathered in,
Snatched thee, o'er eager, with ungentle grasp.


Robert Frost

[Rambis]

31. I can't decide

wipe the tears or throw up! God rest her! condolences to you and the family-

[Hell Hath No Fury]

32. I believe everything Justin experienced and said!

Those who have gone on ahead of us often try to let us know they are okay and still around. With children, they are far more open to this phenomenon and the "signs" they receive, while adults tend to just dismiss these things when they happen. I have no doubt Stacey came by to say "hello" to Justin. And she will come by to say "hello" to you, too -- you just have to recognize it when it happens. :)

[DemExpat]

33. Amazing, joyful, and utterly believable, OMC.

:grouphug:

On his deathbed my own father stopped his wristwatch as he left his body, and we all took this to be a sign from him that on physical death there IS more.

:grouphug:

DemEx

[StrongBad]

34. I do believe this happens man

My mom would often tell me of visions or voices that she had of her mother when she passed on. My mom loved my grandmother so much and she suffered illness for a long period before she died.

My mom felt a very overwhelming sense of comfort from these experiences and it helped her heal and move on afterward.

I do believe that sometimes if the bond is strong enough and the person on Earth is receptive to receiving, those who have passed can give us "signs" that they're not truly ever gone.

I think your story was beautiful.

[Fran Kubelik]

35. Oh OMC

:hug:

Love is an amazing thing.

[hedgehog]

36. It's the one ray of sunshine in all this darkness.

It happens a lot in my family; it's happened to me. The dead are not gone; they've just gone ahead. That doesn't mean you aren't in agony now. Remember it later on when it may be a comfort.

[Dervill Crow]

37. OMC . . .

:grouphug: May your family be comforted.

[GCP]

38. How wonderful!

:hug:

[Sweet Freedom]

39. How lovely!

I am so happy for you that your family received this gift. I hope this continues to bring you comfort throughout your life. :loveya:

When my daughter was about a year old, my grandfather met her for the first time. He had fought vehemently to stay alive for this event and then died two days later. About a year later, my daughter was standing in the hallway of our house waving at the front room. I thought the cat was in there, but when I looked, the room was empty. I asked who she was waving to, and she said, "That man in the rocker." Even though she didn't remember their only meeting, she described the man in the rocker -- my grandpa -- perfectly. :)

I have asked those I love who have passed to welcome Stacey and to show her the way. :hug:

[Mad_Dem_X]

40. I believe you

How wonderful that she visited her son. Thank you for sharing that!

[idgiehkt]

41. thanks for sharing that

my mother experienced something similar when her own mother died when she was ten years old. She says that while she was sleeping her mother came and sat on her bed and told her that everything was going to be okay.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[BlueIris]

42. Well, at least you know that she's okay now.

Sounds like she crossed over quickly and with little trouble. Keep your eyes, ears and mind open, friend. She may have a few more things she wants to communicate to you, too. :-)

[FloridaJudy]

43. Wow.

Thank you for sharing this with us. Reading it gave me chills.

What wonderful proof that those we love never really leave us, but live on in our hearts and, as your son put it, in our heads. Stacey must be a great soul indeed to have inspired this much love in all of you.

(edited because my grammar stinks when I'm crying)

[SeattleGirl]

44. What a wonderful gift to your son and you, OMC.

Stacey has given you yet another beautiful memory to treasure.

[CC]

45. I believe you and Justin...

it is not hard to believe at all that mom would come to comfort her boys. Your two year old may be too young to put it into words or even think it strange that she came to him like she did Justin so he may not say anything. He hasn't been taught it isn't "normal" yet just as Justin wouldn't think it wasn't "normal" though he has the vocabulary to let you know about it. Stacey gave your boys and through them you one more precious gift. Don't let anyone talk you or them out of it or take it away with their disbelief or doubts. I have my own experience with something like it and luckily I had a friend with me (that was an ICU nurse) so that when I did question it she was there to say no it really happened and she had never seen/felt anything like it before.


I have been watching the threads and praying for you, Stacey and the family as you have been going through this. My heart breaks for you all. Hopefully one day, sooner than later, you will find yourself smiling through the tears at your memories of your much loved wife and your life together.

[Redstone]

46. I don't doubt your story, or your son, for one second. There are FAR more mysteries

in this universe than we'll ever be capable of understanding.

I grieve for you and for your son. Do as well as you can, both of you.

Redstone

[Raksha]

47. Thank you for sharing this, OMC.

Not only have you fanned the sparks of faith in hundreds of people to burn just a little bit brighter, you have also helped me understand something about my own father's death I never understood until just now when I read your post. I was five years old when he was killed in a train accident, and something happened that night. Maybe I'll have a chance to explain later, but now isn't the time for it. But THANK YOU a hundred times over!
:hug:

[BrklynLib at work]

48. Young children can still hear the angels we cannot hear as we age.

It is truly wonderful that Justin was able to hear from his Mommy this morning.
She is with you all....and will always be watching over you.

That is the most beautiful story I have ever heard.....

[SPKrazy]

49. that's not something to ever forget

children's minds might not be as cluttered with doubt and reason, and fear as adult minds are.

I would hang on to what it is and what it means to you and he.

:hug:

[WildEyedLiberal]

50. Our souls are capable of far too much love and spiritual growth to snuff out like a candle

Your Stacey will always be with you in the peaceful beyond, and she will be there when you go to join her. :grouphug:

[BlooInBloo]

51. :) Take care of each other.

[Frustratedlady]

52. OMC, what happened to you and your son, this morning, is what I meant...

in my message of condolence to you. Trust me! She is nearby and your children will feel her because they have no preconceptions of how things should play out. Your son will show you how to accept Stacey's death in a simple, childlike way, because he has accepted it. Isn't that wonderful?

When my husband died 9 years ago, I had a wonderful feeling of peace about me and around me. Silly things happened that couldn't be explained, but they were a very strange comfort to me. I won't go into detail at this time, but I want you to be aware and to be open and accepting. You will understand as days go by.

I'm so glad this happened. It will make things easier for you all. God bless you and the boys and blow Stacey a kiss from all of DU.

[RFKHumphreyObama]

53. OMC, I totally believe your son experienced something wonderful….

I found this story so profoundly moving and touching.

I believe the bond between a mother and her children is stronger than we can ever adequately understand. I also think that children are much more sensitive to the spiritual world because of their innocence and their willingness to unquestioningly accept things at face value without the doubt or skepticism that some of us have as we get older

I believe Stacey visited your son to reassure him (and you) that she was all right and at peace and would always watch over him and the entire family. She gave you all a beautiful gift and let you know that the absence of her physical presence in no way changes the deep and profound pure love and devotion she had for you, her children and her family

You and your children and Stacey's family and friends will remain in my thoughts and prayers OMC and you all have my deepest and most heartfelt sympathies and condolences :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[BanzaiBonnie]

55. She is not gone

Only in a different space.

[bridgit]

56. Out of the mouths of babes...

[LisaM]

57. Your family will endure

I know it's not even remotely comparable, but when our first dog (we don't have kids) died, I remember crying and saying, "we won't be the happy family anymore", and my partner told me, "No, we'll ALWAYS be the happy family". As the years have moved on, I have found that it's true. What a great little boy you must have.

[Sheltiemama]

58. Of course she came home

If she could be anyplace in the world, where would she want to be? Back home with you and her children. I think our loved ones stay close to us after they cross that thin veil. Death doesn't sever that connection.

Two months ago, my 27-year-old cousin, who had been treated for bone cancer, died, also of massive infections. I tell you this to reassure you that you did all you could, and Stacey's doctors did all they could. Your accounts of Stacey's hospitalization were extremely similar to my cousin's. Their bodies simply didn't have the resources remaining to fight such aggressive infections. Everything was done that could be done. I do hope you know that.

I can't put into words how very sorry I am. You and your family will continue to be in my prayers.

[truedelphi]

59. All of us who work as hospice workers have stories like this.

It is so good that you are open to this being the way it is.

At times this moment will provide you with a great deal of comfort.

Other times you are still gonna grieve the hell for your wonderful wife.

But the tangible reassurance that she has indeed gone somewhere else and is looking down on you now and until you join her may help a great deal.

I don't have a clue how things like this occur - but have seen for myself the most convinced atheists unable to pass until they realize a vision of a departed relative telling them to jump in the pool - the water's great.

One man hung on for weeks and weeks - a tablespoon of water in each day, less than that out. He was like the "undead". It doesn't even seem possible that someone could survive with so little happening on a physical bodily level.

But he passed with 24 hours of talking to his little sister, who had died way back in 1918.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

60. There are no words save these OMC

May you hear good mornings as well. Always.

My heart goes out to you and your family. May love, blessings and peace be yours.

[Shine]

61. What a beautiful story, OMC.

:hug: What a heartwarming confirmation of the eternal nature of LOVE..... :hug:

Blessings of Peace, Comfort and Strength to you in the difficult days ahead.

You have many here who are holding you and your family in the LIGHT.

:hug:

[JuniperLea]

62. Children are so much more receptive to this sort of thing

Remember the joy! Hold onto that; it will be a blessing to you all.

[libodem]

63. Such a touching story

The father of my children and I were divorced and he later passed away. I really feel he was there looking after the boys from the other side.

[AnotherMother4Peace]

64. Thank you for sharing that, OMC - Your family is in my prayers. Hugs to you and your boys.

[WinkyDink]

65. I can believe totally that your son has "extra" perception.

I share his birth month.

Peace to you all.

[mvd]

66. Thanks for sharing, OMC

In this very hard time, moments of comfort like this are worth cherishing.

[Maraya1969]

67. I believe that she is still with you and your son's job today was to remind

you of that.

:hug:

[sarge43]

68. Stacey had to see her little boy again.

Thank you for sharing that moment, OMC. It took away a bit of the sadness.

[ikojo]

69. Wow!!!! Justin is of an age when he has not yet

been programmed not to listen to the still small voices in his head.

Bless you and your children.

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

[Zuiderelle]

70. She will always be with you and with your son.

I am certain of it. :hug:

[JohnnyLib2]

71. How wonderful.

The love in your family is so strong---no boundaries.

Our thoughts are with you.

[havocmom]

72. She loves her family still...

count on it. And know kids can see what we often have lost the ability to witness.

Trust.

[raptor_rider]

73. OMC Babies

they will be talking to their Mommy. Their minds are still open and can still communicate with Angel's in the paradise of the spirit world. I believe that she came to Justin this morning and talked to him. She was just letting him know that she was just wonderful and that she loves him. I am sure that she was visiting your 2 year old also.

Listen to your babies. She will try to communicate to you also, through them. She is not gone, only in body. She will be with you all forever.

You always return in the physical life to the ones that you love. Whether in this world or the next, your family will always be together, forever.

My love is with all of you!

[The Straight Story]

74. My friend

I don't know what to say here, except that I hope you find the strength you need now for your kids.

You will be in our thoughts and prayers, and know that you have a voice here. Just let it out, and know that there are many here who will listen and talk to you.

[AirmensMom]

75. That's wonderful, OMC!

And I believe it, too. When my dad died 5 years ago, I was having a hard time sleeping. I was in bed sobbing. Then I saw him at the foot of my bed and he said, "It's going to be OK, honey. I'm fine now." Then he left. I was not asleep and I was not dreaming, although I did sleep well afterwards. I haven't seen him since.

My heart goes out to you and the kids. :hug: :grouphug:

[Reciprocity]

76. Save this for your son......

and when he is older, tell him again about the day his mother left this world but not her family.

[Whoa_Nelly]

77. Trust it, dearheart

What happened will be important for all of you when it's time for the healing to begin. :hug:

[Irishonly]

78. Justin Knows

My Sweet Little Chuckie ~ Though I must leave you behind me, This poem will tell you where you always can find me. When a gentle wind blows, that's my hand on your face. And when the tree gives you shade, that's my sheltering embrace. When the sun gives you freckles, that's me tickling my boy. When the rain wets your hair, those are my tears of joy. When the long grass enfolds you, that's me holding you tight. When the Whippoorwill sings, that's me whispering, "Night,night". The Bestest Mom-Rugrats episode and book.

Justin knows his mom is till with him. I pray he sees her in his head every day saying Good Morning. Kids are so much more perceptive than adults.

[txwhitedove]

79. And you will always be a family. Stacey will always be with you.

I am so sorry for your loss. Take care.

[RoyGBiv]

80. When my grandmother died ...

My daughter, who incidentally was four at the time, had a conversation with Grandma that she related to me in the funeral home. Grandma's body was right there, and my daughter, unafraid of anything at that stage of life, stood right up on a stool and started fixing her hair and talking with her. I use the term "with" her on purpose.

I was a wreck. My Grandmother had been a parent, and I was having a lot of trouble letting go. My daughter would whisper to Grandma, then come over to me, sit in my lap, and share with me what she had said, words that were, to my mind, simply not the words of a four-year-old.

Never forgot this. Never will.

Bless you, OMC, and your family.

[susanna]

81. OMC, I'll say something.

First, I am so very sorry for your loss. You have been so amazing during your wife's illness that I came to profoundly respect you through your posts, even though I didn't know you that well. I lit a candle to help, but some things are beyond us. Peace to you as you deal with the changes ahead.

Anyway, I haven't talked to you much on DU, but my experiences may be helpful in regards to your son. I too, have always had an affinity for "the passed." My mother once commented that I did not grieve the way others did when our family members passed over. What she did not know is that I simply couldn't; I have dreams and a sincere knowledge that they are still with me; many times, they were giving me instructions!

In essence, I strongly feel the presence of loved ones who pass - usually from a few days to two weeks, depending on the strength of our connection during "real" life. Because of this, I do not find your son's experience at all odd. I get the feeling that you respect his understanding of these greater concepts from your post. I would just say that some people sense things that others don't. Maybe your son has that ability, and it's always best to try to understand it, as I think you are doing.

Peace to you,
Susanna

on edit: better wording is good

[LeahD]

82. Stacey is with you. Know that this first contact was real, and

she will visit again and again.

[fortyfeetunder]

83. That was a wonderful story

Be sure to save this in a safe place so Justin will remember. Children and their innocence is so precious and they do understand death in a different way.

And a tip on a movie for your kids later...The Lion King...when the little lion despairs at his father's death, one day he looks at his reflection in a pond and realizes his father is with him because he looks just like his father!

[AZBlue]

84. That's beautiful!

She's still with you three - and always will be.

[qanda]

86. That is so beautiful and touching

May Stacey forever stay with you and your children.

[xchrom]

87. there are some things that pass all understanding. thank you for sharing.

[WritersBlock]

88. A mother's love is very powerful.

Both my sister and I felt our mother's presence and an extremely strong wave of peace and love flow over us when she died.

And I know it was at the exact moment when she died, because I'd just had to give permission to the family advocate at the hospital for the ICU team to stop resusitating her - via telephone from 6000 miles away.

OMC, I hope that the knowledge that your wife truly is with you and your children can bring you some comfort.

[alphafemale]

89. My father came to me the same way, and I was in my 30's at the time.

I woke up knowing he had left this life because he came to gently say goodbye while I slept.

It gave me an incredible feeling of comfort because I was hundreds of miles away and was unable to get to his bedside in time.

Even now that "dream" is crystal clear in my memory, and hasn't faded as most dreams do.

The feeling of parental love I was given in that moment is one I will treasure always.

[ocean girl]

90. I have had many visits from departed friends and family

so your experience sounds perfectly normal to me.

My mother, who passed five years ago from breast cancer, is still part of my life and I can feel her near me, especially in times of crisis. My nephew was only one year old when she left and we used to hear him talk to her when he was alone in his room. Children are naturally tuned in - it's normal for them.

People are made of energy and energy can never be destroyed, so I know my loved ones still exist and that I'll see them all again.

I take great comfort in that and hope you will, too.

Peace and love to you and your family.

[BrklynLib at work]

91. For those who have not seen this yet.....

[Hekate]

92. I am just now catching up, BrklynLib. My god. nt

[helderheid]

93. I have read this more than once - it fills me with awe.

[blondeatlast]

94. Kids are amazing amd will give you more strength through this than you can imagine.

God bless you, my friend, and thank you for sharing your story with us. Amid the gloom, the children give hope.

[Burma Jones]

95. It's not often we are so well taught by someone

I thank you so much for your generosity of spirit in sharing your story. It has taught me much about people, especially myself. I sincerely and deeply hope that the knowledge that so many of us will remember Stacey until our own deaths will somehow help you if only a little. Thank You.

[librechik]

97. that brought tears to my eyes, OMC

what's more, it's how i feel about my Dad. When he passed, he left the hospital and moved into my head. I'm closer to him now than ever.

what a special gift. God blessed you indeed.

[SoCalDem]

98. I am so sorry for your loss and for those wonderful little kids.

and yes, I do think people "visit".. I am not religious person, but it's happend in my family too..

When I was a kid, we flew home from overseas because my grandmother had been diagnosed with leukemia (a death sentence in 1961)..We ended up stuck in South Carolina (courtesy of MATS) for a few days.. On the 2nd night, my mother and I both woke up from a sound sleep..at 2:35 AM.. we talked for a while & she said she was dreaming that she was talking to Papa Joe (my grandfather) and when we finally got to our home town the next night, my aunt (her sister) told us that Papa Joe (who was not sick) had died in the kitchen the previous night ..of a stroke.. time of death 2:35 AM (adjusted for time zone difference)..

We always knew that he HAD "talked" to her.. My grandmother died a month later..

[niyad]

99. my thoughts and prayers for you and your family, OMC, and thank you for sharing this beautiful

story. Know that everyone is here for you.
Peace

[Old and In the Way]

100. Deepest condolences.

An amazing story that reaffirms my belief that we know but a glimpse of the big picture. Thanks for sharing this most personal moments with us. I can't begin to understand the depth of grief and loss you are experiencing now, but take comfort in the many people who are thinking of you and your son during these times.

[lonestarnot]

101. Wow. Just wow.

:hug:

[Beelzebud]

103. OMC, you just brought a tear to this die-hard atheists eyes.

I may be atheist, but I'm humble enough to know this universe contains things not easily understood by the rational mind.

You and your family will be in my deepest thoughts. I don't pray, but I don't think it hurts to beam out positive energy to people.

Take care, man.

[marions ghost]

104. Deepest sympathies

you are lucky to have that beautiful perceptive son who senses that there is only a thin partition between this world and the next. Death is an illusion of ours but it's all OK where she is, & she will always be with you if you want her to. Confirm that for him. Tell him that her spirit will never ever leave him. She won't.

So sorry. The separation is hard.

[wicket]

105. prayers for you all

[AspenRose]

106. The Navajo (Dine) have a belief that children and the elderly are

"closest to Creator" because of where they are in life. Children just came from Creator and the elderly are on their way back, so they are more in tune with the unseen. The space in between is where we get so caught up in this life that we forget our connections....

I am so sorry for your loss but I also rejoice in the comfort your son has received from his mom, and that she no longer suffers.

Peace and comfort to you and yours during this time.

[ecstatic]

107. Amazing and touching... thanks for sharing

:grouphug:

[Blue_In_AK]

108. OMC, that is a beautiful story

and confirmation that Stacey's spirit will always be with you and your family.

[eleny]

109. I'm so glad that your son told you and that it's bringing some real comfort to you

My condolences to you and your whole family. We're always here, dear OMC. Somebody is always here.

[TorchTheWitch]

110. I absolutely believe and am not surprised at all

Children do tend to be more sensative to these sort of things, but some adults never lose it... like me. When my dad died he absolutely made his presense known, and I've always taken great comfort in that. Several times in the year after his death I'd feel his presense with me. As time went on there were less visits until they just stopped except sometimes in my sleep especially if I'm in the midst of some crisis. The first visit was immediately after his death (although at the time I didn't know that), and the second was later that day... both visits were extraordinarily profound and I would have thought such a thing would have terrified me, but when it happened there was only an overwhelming feeling of peace, contentment and much comfort. There were a few more visits in the following months, some of them at the most awkward of times (like when I was sitting on the toilet)... but Dad was like that in life, so I'm not surprised at all (he had a way of innocently not respecting the privicay of his loved ones - it wasn't ever unusual for him to barge into the bathroom or bedroom on us without thinking).

I really think these visits are a lot more common than most people realize. There are probably many many people who have had similar visits but chalked it up to their own imaginations or were too unsettled by it to want to ever mention it to anyone.

I'm thrilled this happened to your son, OMC. I'm personally certain these visits have brought only comfort, peace and contentment to countless people as they have for me, and I'm sure it has for your son as well.

:hug:

[pnwmom]

111. I'm so glad you wrote that down, because your little boy might not

necessarily remember it as he gets older, since he's so young. He will be comforted to have this someday.

Your Stacey was such a gift to you. I'm so sorry for your loss, but I know her love will be with you forever.