Why do people automatically assume Vegetarians are judgemental?

[Taverner]

To be honest, I can count the vegetarians I've met who judge us omnivores on one hand. Most vegetarians usually don't broadcast it, and will even eat meat if it's served to them (to be polite.)

I've never seen the stereotypical fire breathing angry vegetarian that gets upset at us meat eaters...so why is it so many here automatically assume veggies are this way?

[RebelOne]

1. Well, I am a vegetarian and I can't say that I am judgmental.

If others want to eat meat, that's their business. But it seems that omnivores are judgmental when it comes to vegetarians.

[electron_blue]

2. I don't know any vegetarians who will eat meat if served to them

I have known many vegetarians who are on a crusade and very obnoxious about pointing out the ills of other's eating habits. But most don/t

[madeline_con]

43. Neither have I...

I've never met one of the obnoxious types of which you write. But I've never known a quiet one who didn't "broadcast" their dietary orientation, either.

[Name removed]

3. Deleted message

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[haf216]

4. My mother

is a vegetarian (although, she eats fish) and is always preaching about eating meat! It really gets on my nerves when we are in a store and she starts in on total strangers!

[Rabrrrrrr]

5. I've met very few; I've met shitloads of judgmental meat eaters, though

Assholes who are somehow threatened by another person's dietary choices who insist that the vegetarian is a communist, unchristian, hippy, unamerican, etc.; or who hear of a person's vegetarianism and so go on at length about the deliciousness of rare meat, dripping onto the plate and yum yum yum yum.

I don't get it at all.

I can only assume they are totally insecure with themselves, and so must find their value in tearing down others and celebrating their likes as being the only possible choice for a like.

And then the meat eating assholes who make fake attempts at cooking for their vegetarian friends by making chicken pot pie but "it doesn't have as much chicken as I usually use, so that's vegetarian" or still put meat in the spaghetti sauce "Yeah, but it's only a little meat" or "You can just pick it out" or otherwise do some kind of foolish, ignorant assholery.

Or the meat eaters who insist, ad nauseum, that eating only vegetables is a total health danger, that we have to have meat to live (somehow diregarding the 3 billion or so world vegetarians who don't seem to be dying and have perpetuated their societies for thousands of years), or who insist that the only reason people become vegetarian is to insult meat eaters.

Fuckers. I don't get it at all.

And I am a meat eater, by the way. But I am nice to my vegetarian friends.

[matcom]

6. you fed me human embryo's last week for dinner!

and told me it was Tofu x(

[Rabrrrrrr]

9. No, I fed you Kelly Brook and told you it was Tofu.

bastard.

:grr:

[ThomCat]

20. That is an awesome post.

I have to give you a hug for that. :hug:

[jobycom]

7. I have a theory

Many meat eaters try to convert me, and I've never tried to convert one. After a while of listening to their arguments, I've concluded that a lot of them don't feel comfortable with eating meat. I don't think it's conscious, I think it's subconscious, but every time a meat eater tells me--without me asking them or saying a single thing-- stuff like "Well, I don't have a problem eating animals. They aren't humans, they don't feel, they don't have emotions, they are just like vegetables, I'm just harvesting them, sometimes it's sad but that's the way it is," I hear the denial in their voice, like someone telling me they don't have a drinking problem. Not all are like this, of course, but those are the ones who will later claim that vegetarians try to convert them. It's like just telling them you are a vegetarian brings up all sorts of pressure inside them, and they feel it came from you.

Just my observations.

[Taverner]

8. I can say I do feel guilty eating mammals

It's hard to explain, but I can actually feel for mammals.

Chicken and fish, on the other hand, are different.

[ThomCat]

21. Yes, it's like they're constantly justifying meat to themselves.

[Treclo]

10. Well, the obnoxious ones attract all the attention.

And since there are vegetarian animal rights activists who are very passionate about animal fate, sometimes this passion probably turns into misguided, fire-breathing soapboxing. You can probably at least understand this, because I'm sure some of you have done the same in regards to your political beliefs.

I DESPISE the fact that animals suffer so much for our convenience, but I don't blame individuals for this fact -after all, for 28 years I never really thought much about it myself. I would never talk to folks about my beliefs at the dinner table. IF they are curious, I'll talk to them about it when we're not eating, but only if they ask me first. That said, I'm happy to tell them WHY I choose to live the way I do, and my philosophy behind it.

So how do you try to change the status quo without upsetting people? Not possible. I do think that people are more likely to be curious about my beliefs if I don't shove them down their throats, (pun definatly intended). How we eat is so deeply ingrained in all of us, and I think telling people how wrong they are only makes them defensive- it does me anyway. But I am passionate about it, so if people ask me about my choices I tell them.

[RedCloud]

11. Would meat eaters eat vegetarians?

About time somebody answered Grace Slick's immortal inquiry:

What if you were starving to death and the only food you had was (Sic!) me (Sic!)?
What would you say to the cannibal question and would your answer be perfectly free?

[Taverner]

12. I'd eat Grace Slick

But I can imagine she'd only make good jerky

:evilgrin:

[fishwax]

13. I've known tons of carnivores who were obnoxious towards vegetarians, but

nary a vegetarian who was obnoxious to me about the fact that I'm not a vegetarian. And yet the perception is that it is the vegetarians who are on some sort of crusade, rather than the meat eaters. It is weird.

[ghostsofgiants]

14. Projection, maybe?

[Ellen Forradalom]

50. We have a winner

Some folks become defensive and insecure upon meeting someone who has put some thought into their dietary habits.

[Chan790]

15. I guess I'm a tweener.

I won't get judgemental towards omnivores unless they start it (and a LOT of omnivores WILL start sh*t), at which point you've made yourself fair-game to be told exactly how awful meat-consumption is, in graphic detail, during your favorite rare steak; not me.

I am not eating it though. Period. I don't care whose feeling are hurt, friends are not worth getting meat-sick over.

[Name removed]

16. Deleted message

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[RandomKoolzip]

17. Oh, I've known plenty of vegtarians who were assholes.

Guys and gals who INSISTED on being holier-than-thou humorless dickcheeses, tedious lecturers, and didactic twunts. Vegetrians wouldn't have gotten a reputation as being judgemental if there weren't a little bit of truth to the stereotype.

Then again, BECAUSE of the perceived superiority of vehetarians, there was a backlash, and now many meat-eaters have gone whole hog in the other direction, which is just as bad, if not worse. People who brag about eating rare steaks and order massive amounts of meat just too rub it in vegetarians' faces are a real fuckin' hoot, lemme tell ya. :eyes:

It's just a case of every special interest group thinking that they're some sort of oppressed minority challenging the "status quo." Meat eaters think they're being bullied by the "food police" into feeling guilty about animals being killed for their meat, and maybe a decade ago there may have been a solid but negligable case for such a situation, judging by how many schmuck vegetarians I knew who used to give ME a hard time for eating hamburgers. And now vegetarians feel THEY'RE being browbeaten by the establishment and by reactionary carnivores intent on being all macho and un-PC.

The answer? Just eat what you want and don't proseltyze - for either camp. It's unattractive and only causes others to be reactionary.

[prolesunited]

32. Best advice ever

Speaking as a vegetarian who is married to a meat-eater, I can testify to the fact that we can peacefully co-exist. He doesn't try to make me eat meat (and even uses separate tongs if he's grilling) and I don't get him to try and stop.

[tjwmason]

18. The loud minority.

It is a very small minority, but it can be vocal. Given that most vegetarians are quiet and polite about it, often folk don't realise that they are vegetarian - thus in their minds the association of vegetarian is with the small, yet vociferous, minority.

[ThomCat]

19. Whenever anyone finds out I'm a vegetarian

I almost always get "the conversation" from meat-eaters about how great a bloody rare steak is and how they could never live without meat. The pushy people I meet are always meet-eaters.

I get this same conversation from co-workers on a fairly regular basis like a old joke that won't die.

I have no idea why vegetarians have the bad reputation. It's meat-eaters who are usually rude and hostile to vegetarians, not the other way around.

[Name removed]

22. Deleted sub-thread

Sub-thread removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Rabrrrrrr]

25. Damn! Hey - everyone - what did I miss?

I totally missed anyu part of this subthread.

Damn meetings, taking me away from DU!

[LeftyMom]

23. Well, I won't eat meat (or dairy or whatever) to be polite

but I'm always perfectly willing to bring a dish, eat before an event, etc. I don't expect other people to plan thier lives around my veganism.

I don't really talk about it in person unless other people bring it up. A lot of people ask questions, usually politely. I have on occasion been interrogated by people, or met people who want to tell me just how many deer tags thier family got last year or what have you, but more often than not people are really nice about it.

[Mutley]

24. I've met nice people, and I've met assholes from both sides.

You can't really say everyone in one group is an asshole, or nice, or whatever. There are asshole vegetarians, asshole omnivores, asshole liberals, asshole school teachers, etc. That's life.

[Oeditpus Rex]

26. I don't think omnis are judgemental

as much as they're pre-emptively defensive. They hear "vegan" and think, "They're gonna judge me on what I eat," and they put up their shields. Unfortunately, some people have shields that aren't purely defensive.

The mindset here is that vegan is better — i.e. healthier — so it's not unlike that of smokers and non-smokers — and we all know where that goes. But, in truth, it's simply a lifestyle choice. Certainly vegans believe it's better, though I've yet to meet any who proselytize unless pushed to the wall. But it's not uncommon for humans to connect "better" with "arrogant," especially in this society.

I confess I've felt somewhat defensive about LeftyMom and others — which is why I rarely post in these threads (in fact, I think this is the first time). If I were to break bread with her or other vegans, I'd feel self-conscious, even though my rational mind knows that's just crap in her case. (And I say "in her case" not because I think others would judge me, but because I don't know them well enough to know if they would or not.)

Quite frankly, I wish threads such as this would never get started. They're extremely divisive, and I just don't see the point.

[LeftyMom]

27. Yeah, you say that now

Just wait until I'm on your porch at 8 am on a Saturday morning with a pile of Why Vegan? pamphlets asking if you'd like a free copy of Diet For A New America. :rofl:

All the DU vegans are really cool people though.

[Oeditpus Rex]

30. ...

:hug: :loveya:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

39. Damn. I had to pay for my copy of...

"Diet for a New America." At least my copy of "Soy, Not 'Oi!'" was free. It has "over 100 recipes to overthrow the government" compiled by the "Hippycore Krew."

[pitohui]

28. because our experience is different from yours

you are v. lucky, i've met many judgmental vegetarians -- ironically, never more than when i was a vegetarian myself

none would eat meat to be polite and most do, in fact, broadcast it and want everyone inconvenienced in tribute to their higher evolution and greater sensitivity

it's prob. the real reason i stopped being veggie, i didn't want to be lumped in w. a bunch of attention-seekers who made every meal a nuisance instead of a time of companionship

[Monk06]

29. I find your comments re non vegetatians..........er.......judgemental.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

31. My kids (now grown) had lots of veggie and vegan

friends. Problem was, they'd come to our house and smell: bacon, turkey, roast beef....

then they'd stand in the kitchen and just pick a little here or there...then they'd sit at the table and scarf. We got a rep for backsliding vegans. It was sad, really. We didn't do it on purpose. We didn't invite them; they just showed up. And ate.

[calico1]

33. I have encountered idiots on both sides.

I have been preached to by vegans mostly. One time here on this board. On the other hand I have also seen stupid meat eaters exaggerating their enjoyment of the steak they are having as if they think they are really making the vegans so envious..."look what you are missing!..mmmmmmmm!" :eyes: I don't know why they do that because I would think that a vegan would be disgusted not tempted. It has to do with manners and respect, not whether you eat meat or not. Just as some very religious people cannot keep from proselyting, some vegans can't keep from making comments to me if I am eating meat. But I have seen some of them also have to put up with stupid comments. So as I said its all about manners and respect.

[liontamer]

34. do they really?

I don't. I think there have been some passionate posts on this issue, but just because some there have been some flame wars doesn't mean that anybody thinks all vegetarians are judgemental. Now if the topic were Laura Brannigan wearing capris and cropped sweaters ...

[pagerbear]

35. Same reason they assume opera singers only like opera?

.

[arwalden]

46. ~

:hi:

[NewWaveChick1981]

36. I think it's because of the moral/ethical issues resolved by vegetarianism

People who don't understand why veggies are veggies assume they will be berated and judged by them. It's a stereotype and not fair in the least. My veggie friends are not judgmental about anyone else in that regard.

[yewberry]

37. I think it's the black robes and powdered wigs.

At the big secret meeting, I tried to tell them all that it was the wrong image to project (I was lobbying hard for togas) but nooooo, they weren't having it.

[NMMNG]

38. Because of PETA, perhaps

:shrug:

[unsavedtrash]

40. If someone has gone to the trouble of preparing a dish with meat or a

steak for me then I would definitely eat it and ask for seconds. I am a vegetarian and I can't stand people being judgemental about how another person eats.

[RebelOne]

41. I doubt you would if you are a true vegetarian.

Just the thought of putting meat in my mouth gags me.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

42. You're not a real vegetarian.

I'm not even a real vegetarian. I only eat fish, but I won't eat meat or chicken at somebody's house. I'll eat whatever else they prepare, but I won't eat meat. I've never met someone who was offended by that.

[Bridget Burke]

52. That's silly....

If I unwittingly served meat to a vegetarian, I wouldn't feel hurt if they only ate the vegetables. Especially if they avoided making retching noises!

And I wouldn't serve someone a steak unless I were sure they would enjoy it.

[arwalden]

44. Curious, That... Huh?

[Bassic]

45. Few vegetarians I have met are judgemental.

Although, virtually every Vegan I've met were very judgemental, but I'm pretty sure that was a fluke.

[last_texas_dem]

47. I've never met the pushy vegetarian stereotype either

I think the media is responsible to a point; the pushy, preachy vegetarian stereotype goes right along with the pushy, preacher liberal stereotype they enjoy broadcasting so much.

But yeah, all of the vegetarians I've known have been very polite about the way they are. While they haven't gone as far as to eat meat out of politeness they have never preached about why the meat eaters surrounding them shouldn't be eating meat, etc. It has always been the defensive meat-eaters cracking jokes about the vegetarians, making erroneous claims about the benefits of eating meat/ downfalls of being vegetarian, etc. I have often defended vegetarianism to smarmy-acting meat-eaters (one time, in front of a large college class!).

FWIW, I am an omnivore whose primary reason for not being vegetarian (yet) is mostly laziness. (Not being much of a cook myself, and living in an area where vegetarian options are very limited on most restaurant menus, make the decision more complicated.) Also, I do love to eat meat, but I have discussed the reasons for being vegetarian with my sister and a friend (both vegetarians) and know it would be a very positive decision. So I may become one eventually. For now I remain an outspoken defender of the vegetarian choice who just happens to be a hypocrite!

[querelle]

48. A Good Friend

of mine is vegetarian and not judgemental at all. Whenever I entertain her at my house, I accomodate her preference. In doing so, I have discovered many tasty recipes that I would otherwise never have tried. Also, she has introduced me to some really great vegetarian restaurants. When I eat meat in her presence she makes jokes about it, but it's all in fun really. She's a realist and knows that we carnivores will never give up our dead animals.

Q

[XemaSab]

49. Because most carnivores feel guilty about eating meat?

:hide:

[Bridget Burke]

51. Why do you automatically assume other Omnivores are judgmental? n/t

[progmom]

53. I had never encountered this in "real life"

...and was initially flummoxed by the clashes here. There's definitely a judgmental tone to the conversations you see about this on DU (on both sides of the issue), but I wonder if that's really just more personality driven. :shrug: