The attention whore is in the hospital (Sorry - RANT)

[Not_Giving_Up]

My mother has finally gotten what she's been working on for a month. You see, she's Type I Diabetic, has been for over 30 years. She still plays games with what she eats the way you'd expect a new diabetic to do. If her sugar goes down, she'll drink a soda instead of orange juice. If it's too high, she just won't eat, then it falls dramatically, and she whines that she doesn't know why. I lost patience as a kid the brazillionth time I had to call for an ambulance because she was out cold on the floor.

There's always a ramp up to these things, and this time was no exception. My mother is one of those people who HAS to have something wrong with her all of the time. If it's not her sugar, it's something else. Doctors run tests, nothing shows up, and she swears that she's in pain. (She has spent two years going to an ear nose throat guy because her nose it throbbing - they can't find anything wrong with her!) Apparently, we haven't been nice enough to her lately, so she's laying it on thick.

The last month has been filled with her sugar skyrocketing and bottoming out. The night before Thanksgiving, she was home alone and passed out. She came to, but couldn't get up. She crawled to a phone and called my stepdad at work, and he went home and took care of her. She called me the day after Thanksgiving asking me to call her once an hour and check on her because her sugar was low. I called her an hour later, and she sounded fine. The next time I called her, she took forever to get to the phone, then apologized - she was in the SHOWER. Let me get this straight - you're SO worried that your sugar is low that you have me calling you to check on you, but you get in the SHOWER?

Two days ago, my stepdad called me. He had been at home with my mom, he was watching TV, she was on the computer. At one point, he went to the bedroom, and found her face down across the bed. He couldn't get her awake, so he called 911. When the ambulance got there, her sugar was 24. She didn't come out of it as easily as she usually does, and was admitted to the hospital. My stepdad asked me to call her parents and let them know. My grandmother told me that my mom was over there earlier in the week, crying about what had happened before Thanksgiving. My eighty year old grandfather was in tears before it was over. He's not in the best of health and didn't need that, but who cares...the attention whore got what she wanted. My mom called me that night after she got a room, and was having a fit because when she called her mother, she didn't get sympathy, she got a lecture about how she needs to take care of herself better. I usually either give her the same lecture, or just ignore her.

So, now the attention whore is all upset because no one is going to see her. Sorry, bitch, I had the flu for 4 days, then had kids home sick from school. When I talked to my stepdad last night, he said that the doctor has decided to put her on an insulin pump. I knew that this had been talked about before, but I didn't know that it was mom who insisted that they not do this. I think she realizes that it would be harder for her to play her little games with the pump in place. My stepdad says it was be about 6 weeks before it can be done, but she's going on the pump. I haven't heard from her today, but there's a chance she'll be discharged today if no major problems with her sugar arise.

I'm going to do some reading on the pump and pass the info to my stepdad, because he really doesn't know anything about it. He's fed up with her too, because he knows she does this crap on purpose.

[mainegreen]

1. Ouch! Sorry

Sounds like a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation.

:hug:

[Not_Giving_Up]

2. Well, for years, my stepdad gave me

"Be nicer to your mother" lectures. He didn't get that she did it on purpose, she had him snowed. He gets it now, but does ask that when I chew her out, I do it with a civil tongue.

[GreenPartyVoter]

5. Well, that's some progress then. *hugs* Sorry your family has

all this unnecessary extra stress. Sounds like your mom needs to find a positive way to get some attention.

[MsAnthropy]

3. I just read a great book on "emotional vampires"

who suck the life out of you, since I'm related to one also. It really helped put her in perspective and allowed me to detach.

[CatBoreal]

4. May I suggest you PM...

Cornfield. Her husband is on an insulin pump and she should be able to tell you what it's like to live with.

I'm really sorry about your mom. She sounds like a true manipulator.

[KitchenWitch]

6. I know someone like that

She must get dizzy the way she thinks the world revolves around her...

PM me if you need to...

[SoCalDem]

7. The pump (at least the kind my friend has) does not dispense

insulin..she can (and might) still "forget".. It sounds like she really needs a shrink :hug: to you and yours

[Groggy]

8. wow..

Trying to keep my cool here. My mother was also a Type 1 diabetic for almost 50 years. Sometimes no matter how hard she tried, she would get low blood sugars. Believe me, she took VERY good care of herself. PLEASE consider the fact that it MAY NOT BE ANYTHING THAT YOUR MOTHER HAS DONE OR NOT DONE that is bringing on her low blood sugar. In my mother’s later years, she could be fine and half and hour later be out like a light and have no warning signals! Again--even though she was very careful with what she ate and taking her insulin. Having diabetes for that long plays havoc on your body. I’m sorry, I understand you are frustrated, and I don’t know you, but I am APALLED at the way you talk about your mother.

My mother passed away two years ago, I loved her more than anything and I miss her every day. Diabetes is a horrible disease and what eventually KILLED MY mother. It affected her kidneys, her eyes, her heart--every organ in her body. Get yourself educated. Consider the fact that your mother is not having low blood sugar just to piss YOU off! I wouldn’t wish that disease on anyone.

At least you have a mother.

[LynzM]

9. Groggy, be gentle

As a Type 1 diabetic myself, I've known plenty of people other diabetics who have done exactly what the OP is describing... using it to get attention, purposely playing around. It's a sick way to get attention, but it works, and it could defnitely be what is going on there. Your sadness and anger about losing your own mother, which is certainly justified, doesn't mean that you should accuse the OP of lying.

[Groggy]

13. I'm sorry

Its just when I hear someone calling their mother a "bitch" and a "whore" it doesn't sit well with me. And yes I have been very sad and depressed especially this time of year because I loved her and miss her so much. I'm sorry if I offended you or the person that posted, but it really hit a nerve with me--obviously. The same thing (low blood sugars) would happen to my mom, but I NEVER considered it her fault. I guess I shouldn't have posted what I did--its probably the grief talking, and I'm not saying they are lying--maybe I just wish she or he would try to be more understanding. Whatever.

[bmbmd]

17. I'm with you, Groggy.

Diabetes sucks, for sure-but these issues go far beyond that.

[GrumpyGreg]

14. I can't even imagine anyone calling their mother an attention whore.

Especially a mother who isn't well.

God ! I'd give 10 years of my life to have one day with my mother again.

[ScreamingMeemie]

15. My mother is an attention whore. I love her, but that is what she is.

Instead of seeing me as a daughter she saw me as "the competition" all of my life, and referred to me as "the little bitch" for as far back as I can remember when she was angry with me. Yes GrumpyGreg, (nice name ;)) there are times when Moms are not the picture perfect dream we all wish and long for. My mother made me sad for a very long time, my mother helped foster the self esteem issues I carry to this day. While I wish I could have a decent friendship with my mother, that is impossible, because she makes it that way. So I can only do the next best thing...not make the same mistakes with my daughter.

[BuelahWitch]

16. My mother was like that too

When her mother died, I was "Mom" at 16. Stayed that way for 21 years.
I realized that alot of my mother's problems, both health and social, were brought on by her behavior, but it still caused me alot of stress.
It's one reason I'm glad I never had, and will never have, any kids.

[LynzM]

10. Hugs to you

That sounds terribly frustrating to deal with, if she is always dong that. I've been on and off the pump twice; PM me if you want more info about it. It won't keep her from doing that kind of stuff, sorry to have to tell you that. I'm sorry that her desire for negative attention has such an impact on your family :hug:

[WeRQ4U]

11. 24 - That's nuts. My lowest ever is 29.

And I was seeing spots. It was early on after my diagnosis and I didn't really have a clue what I was doing. That and they had me on a TERRIBLE insulin schedule.

I'm in the process of getting a pump as well. The newer models work in tandem with the glucose monitor. The monitor tells teh pump what your blood sugar level is and the pump then figures out what the dose of insulin should be. You have to manually add this large amount of insulin by pressing a button. You don't do the calculations, but you have to agree to give yourself that amount. In addition to that, the pump gives constant small amounts of insulin to keep your basal levels at a certain point. This is needed because without it, your body won't be able to handle the constant metabolism that happens throughout the day. Fats, for instance, metabolize later for me, and in a big way. If I didn't have long acting insulin supply, my BS would be at about 400 all day. That's not ideal.

Honestly, the pump is a good idea for someone that is interested in making their sugars MORE stable. The way it sounds, no offense, but your mother couldn't care less about what the numbers are. This may actually make the situation worse. In addition to the high and low blood sugar levels, now you'll be forced to deal with technology, new schedule, etc. And you'll still have problems with her "forgetting" to take the appropriate amounts of insulin.

Plus, the pump is worthless (in it's newest incarnation) if you don't check your blood sugars often enough. That's how it works.

If you have any questions at all abuot the "betes" just let me know.

[bleedingheart]

12. what she is doing is so very dangerous

diabetes is no joke...

I feel bad for your family.

My aunt who was in her earlier years a red-headed bombshell, got type II (around 60). Couldn't deal with the idea of altering her diet...so my uncle had to keep an eye on her constantly. She thought the doctors were full of shit and she liked the attention she got when she was in the hospital. She would consume entire boxes of donuts and the like...thinking all the while she would not be affected.

She ended up getting ulcers on her feet and lost portions of both legs and is in a wheelchair. Her vision is completely messed up and she can barely see. I guess she showed us all didn't she...

[rainbow4321]

18. I predicted my attention whore mother's illness 6 months in advance

See, any major/minor family activities (births, parties, weddings, birthday parties) threaten her attention needs..so when my sis got pregnant I predicted A-W mother would "get sick" right when the baby was due...made this prediction when sis was like 3 months pregnant.

BINGO--- literally the day sis and baby came home, A-W mother "got sick, fever 103, you have to come see me, take care of me" she tells sis. Sis says HELL NO is she going to expose herself or her baby to that("fever" resolved within minutes of sis refusing to go see her.)

Mother ends up in the hospital...most likely not taking her meds/lying about symptoms. Some relatives pissed at ME for not taking a week off work to go see her--over an illness that I predicted well in advance.

Then I tell them that she will bail out of rehab, cuz people who like attention don't want to "get better". A few days into rehab, she tries to leave cuz they expect her to get out of bed.

If ever there was someone who needs to be bitch-slapped til her head falls off, it is my A-W mother...

[Mizmoon]

19. You're angry about other things besides this

You shouldn't call your mother bad names.

:(

[liontamer]

21. so what if she is?

If her mother has had these issues her whole life the OP knows what she's talking about. She isn't calling your mother names. Let her vent in peace.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

20. You are eaten up with anger

and I have BEEN THERE. My mother was a piece of work, although I loved her a lot. But there were times...

Well, bottom line. GET SOME HELP. You need to talk this out. If you can't do that, join and online support group for elderly issues and get some books about it.

One time I got so angry at my mother that I came down with shingles. You just have no idea what this level of anger can do to you physically.

Remember that some of us (including your mother and including you at the moment) can function on negative energy better than positive. But it is damned unpleasant for you and those around you.