I always open the door for Jehovah's Witnesses.

[DrWeird]

It's not that I tolerate proselytizing (in all honesty, I couldn't have spelled it either if I didn't have a dictionary sitting on my desk), it's not that I feel guilty for not answering the door. It's just that I have this awful feeling that if he thinks I'm not here than he'll be coming in through the open window to steal my TV. I can't help but think that there's some gang of theives out there that dress up in ties and short sleeve dress shirts with the intent of breaking and entering. I mean nobody expects the Jehovahs Witnesses (like the butler, or a modern Amish).

btw, is 'modern Amish' an oxymoro?

[JackSwift]

1. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition

That's why my Browning 12 gauge automatic shotgun is at the ready. Not even the pump action sound to warn 'em.

[Cat Atomic]

2. You're thinking of Jehovah's Perpetrators.

The Jehovah's Witnesses are just sort of by-standers. They're no threat at all. Watch out for the Perps though.

[JackSwift]

3. I have to disagree, Jehovah's Witnesses are sinners

just like the rest of us. Which is a bit different than say Catholic Priests, who have a higher percentage of sinners because the church covered up so many child molestations that they were (are?) a haven for molestors.

[DrWeird]

5. Hey now...

I didn't start this thread so people could point fingers at other peoples goofy little cults.

[JNelson6563]

10. you just exposed your ignorance about

the Watchtower cult. At least you got a dig in at the RCC but the price was steeper than you may have known. Poor soul.

[7th_Sephiroth]

18. i keep either

a .22 Hunting rifle (unloaded, but they run when they see me work the bolt) a large sword *they also run when they see that* or i just draw my twin de.50ae7's on them (the usual effect is a pants-shitting)

[Rabrrrrrr]

13. LOL!!

I love it!

And the Jehova's Witness Protectors, while not nasty, can sometimes leave a mess in the flower bed.

[LibertyorDeath]

4. I would rather have my stuff stolen

[nemo137]

6. i answer the door for them, and for people selling stuff for school

and i listen to telemarketers. do i buy anything? no, but i'm polite. they're out there all goddamn day, so why shouldn't i give them a liten.

[Rocinante]

8. I'm not too kind to people

who knock on my door to convert me or sell me something, but I am nice to the kids who sell stuff for their school. It's a damn shame that school kids have to get out on the streets and do that and it's a shame that teachers have to pay out of their pockets for classroom supplies. I bet Chimp wouldn't part with a penny if he was smart enough to be a teacher.

[Don_G]

7. I Do Too

But I always make sure I have my car insurance papers on my desk by the front door so I can scare them off with a good, pushy and "offical" line of BS.

What burglars are going to steal your TV if they think they won't escape with a 20 year Term Policy?

I couldn't fit a used car in my living room anyway....

[trof]

9. If it's a lady, I do too.

Otherwise, they can open their own doors.
;-)

[Seneca]

11. answer the door naked

Like I always do. Gives them something to talk about for many years.

[opihimoimoi]

12. They are brainwashed ignorant sheep slaves who wish to drag yo ass into

the fold too.

The JWs are a cult, an evil cult who prey on the meek and weak.

[Hubert Flottz]

14. I open the door to let my 'Jehovah's Witness Hound' out!

And watch them do a hundred yard dash for the front gate! I guess they don't have the same brand of faith that Daniel had in the lion's den! You ain't lived till you see a JW do a wind sprint for Jayzuz!

[Ilsa]

15. My dad used to witness to them

and to the Mormons that would come to the door. I think he converted a young Mormon to Southern Baptist one time. They must have marked our address because no one ever came back.

[carpetbagger]

16. I do the same thing, only for Unitarian Christianity.

It's nothing they've ever been prepared for. I give them equal time, but you can say quite a bit in ten minutes.

[Bombero1956]

17. that's why I have a sign on the front door

"if you ring my doorbell to sell me something, you're gonna have to take out my trash"

on edit:
What goes "klop,klop,klop,klop,bang!,klop,klop,klop,klop.

An Amish drive by