Homphobes Killed 'Alexander'! DAMN YOU HOMOPHOBES!

[Placebo]

Alexander has proved to be the Thanksgiving weekend's biggest flop, and while it is a portrait of a legendary leader who ruled far-away lands more than 300 years before the birth of Christ, it has brutally exposed the cultural and moral divide which slices America in two.

The three-hour, big budget epic, starring Colin Farrell, Colin Farrell's shockingly bad blond hair-do and Angelina Jolie has dared to suggest what most historians have long taken for granted - that Alexander was bisexual. And that gets rather different responses in different parts of the US.

The Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation says the $150m (£79m) film breaks new ground for a big budget epic because it shows boyhood friend Hephaestion "as the true love of Alexander's life". A line from the film says: "Alexander was defeated only once - by Hephaestion's thighs."

But conservative Christians have loudly denounced Alexander as "pro-gay" propaganda from Tinseltown, insisting that Alexander was a firmly hetero hero.

Since opening, it has grossed just under $20m, leaving it in sixth place in a table of the most popular current films behind National Treasure, The Incredibles, Christmas with the Kranks, The Polar Express and even The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie.

The mainstream press has also ridiculed the movie - calling it everything from a "noble failure" to an "indifferent epic".

It is being suggested that a film about a global warrior with dyed blond hair and waxed legs was never going to conquer an America fresh out of a presidential election in which gay rights became a major issue.

The film is a blowsy biography of the Macedonian conqueror, long on emotional speeches and short on battles. But the poor script and suspect casting is only partly to blame.

According to one online critic, Alexander is a flop because he is "as gay as a maypole". Christians considering seeing the film have even been urged to "speak to your pastors immediately because Satan is attempting to enter your mind".

At the other end of the spectrum, militant gay groups are condemning Stone for not being more explicit in his depiction of the gay love affair - there is not even a kiss between Farrell and his co-star Jared Leto, while Alexander and his wife Roxane, played by Rosario Dawson, share a graphic sex scene.

full article may be found here: http://news.independent.co.uk/world/americas/story.jsp?story=587778

[Goldmund]

1. Oh THAT'S WHY... LOL

I had a thread started earlier today... This movie is a spectacular piece of shit.

And another reason it pissed me off is the utter self-conscious timidity in expressing Alexander's bisexuality. Like, the biggest thing you ever see is guys HUG!

[Liberal Veteran]

2. Yeah, if they think a hug is bad, Queer as Folk....

...would probably cause the fundies to have a seizure.

[Placebo]

4. Queer as Folk would probably cause ME to have a seizure...

If I had to watch that crap show again. :crazy: :nuke: :crazy: hehe

[Liberal Veteran]

7. Oh, it's not THAT bad....

Not saying it couldn't be a lot better, but even so, it better than Will and Grace.

[Placebo]

11. Oh yes. It's that bad, and WORSE.

Uuuuuuugh, i get brain pain just thinking about it.

[AngryLizard]

23. Wait, are we talking about Alexander or Queer as Folk?

Because Queer as Folk is pretty bad, too. Although I haven't watched it in a couple of years, so it could have gotten better...

[AngryLizard]

22. A SPECTACULAR piece of shit

That bears repeating, early and often. It didn't do badly because it was gay, 'cause it really, really wasn't, in a way that was almost insulting. It did badly because it was a god awful movie. I mean seriously, I haven't seen a movie that bad since Colin Farrel's last movie, "A home at the end of the world". That was another piece of shit, and, coincidently, far more gay than this one. For one, guys got to actually touch and stuff.

[eleonora]

3. Collin Farell...bleeesh

I'm sorry but the movie *really* sucked. It was boring and nonsensical. The gay plot could have been beautiful and interesting but instead, with the way Stone filmed it, it was laughable.

Collin Farell sucks too. They should have casted a sexier, stronger actor.

[bleedingheart]

8. A young Val Kilmer would have been a better Alexander

the commercials for this disaster are bad enough....

[lightbulb]

10. I don't think Gay is Stone's forte

Remember the film JFK getting attacked as being homophobic for its portrayal of the gay-fascist-covert-operative underworld of New Orleans? Hehe!

[Placebo]

13. That's a good point!

:thumbsup:

[SemiCharmedQuark]

5. Homophobes can't stand the idea that the "manliest" conqueror was bisexual

Our culture always uses manliness interchangeably with bravery, courage, daring, wits, etc. "Be a man" "what a man" "How manly" blah blah blah. Of course this also comes with the implicit notion of a straight man. And here is this movie about one of the greatest military geniuses of our time and truly all that the word "manly" can conjur up and ooops! He's bisexual! Oh no!

I haven't seen it yet. But Im disgusted by the negative reaction to just the sexuality aspect.

[azoth]

6. "as gay as a maypole"... WTF?

Maypoles are maypoles. They have no sexual identity. True - they serve a purpose in a blatantly sexual holiday ritual but to use the phrase "gay as a maypole" is asinine.

And to suggest that people should discuss it with their *pastor*!! *sigh* Where the hell are we anyway? This is not the America I envision when I think of Liberty and Justice for all - or Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness, for that matter.

Maybe I'm taking this too seriously but this kind of idiocy just creeps under my skin.

[Liberal Veteran]

17. Shut up you...you...you MAYPOLEPHOBIC!

Why do hate maypoles????

:) :) :)

[Beware the Beast Man]

9. In all fairness, Alexander probably flopped

because it was a huge turd of a movie. Controversy sells. If it were really a big deal, than the film would have been a hit.

[Ian David]

12. Why not a gay Jesus movie?

Come on, who's with me?

A gay Jesus movie.

If the fundies are gonna get all worked-up over a subtle gay subtext, you might as well jump in with both feet and make a gay Jesus movie with an NC-17 rating.

[Liberal Veteran]

16. Obviously you aren't familiar with the gay Jesus petition....

Snopes has the petition against a film portraying Jesus as a gay person dated back as far as 1985, but I remember it in the late 70's in my Southern Baptist church.

This petition has been going around the block FOREVER it seems about a non-existant movie that is going to portray Jesus as a homosexual.

It's laughably funny and sad at the same time that the petition is STILL going around in email form a quarter of a century after I first got wind of it.

[crispini]

20. Wow.

This concept totally blows my mind! It'd be GREAT!

[eleonora]

21. hahahaha! "Jesus and Paul"

:thumbsup:

[AngryLizard]

24. It's kind of like saying Gigli failed because JLo played a lesbian

Or was it because it was a really bad movie? You be the judge.

Yeah, I saw that one, too. Sigh.

[The Sushi Bandit]

14. Tribune Media's Michael Szymanski says "Best Picture of the Year"

Michael Szymanski is an award winning writer and critic for among others Tribune Media.

He is also known as the writer "Micky Skee" in the Bi-sexual community.

... I have not seen the movie yet, but based on his recommendation, I will go!

He has never been wrong on a review!

[THUNDER HANDS]

15. the fact that it was 3 hous probably scared people away

A 3-hour history lesson is not something you take a date to. I mean, this is not Lord of the Rings fantasy stuff.

[UdoKier]

18. I didn't go see it because it looks boring.

I like Stone and Farrell, and would be fine with some bisexual romping, but I don't want to sit through a long, boring series of similar battle scenes like "Troy".

[terrya]

19. To homophobes: here's a bulletin from the news center.

Men loving men is NOT a new concept. It's been around for thousands of years.

It is widely known that Alexander had an intense love affair with Hephaestion. This is a historical fact.

I'm getting more than a little tired of this attempted re-writing of history just to satisfy some pea brained morons.

[NaturalHigh]

25. From what I've heard,

Alexander flopped because it was as boring as a documentary about how paint dries.