"I bought this two years ago, can I return it?"

[jmowreader]

Today I was at work selling lumber and got a phone call.

"Hello, we bought 5100 bricks to underpin a doublewide. We sold the doublewide and bought a house, so now we don't need the bricks. Can you send out a truck to pick them up so we can get our money back?"

(Scratching head because I haven't seen ten full skids of brick go out the door to the same customer in a long, long time...)

'Ma'am, when did you purchase these bricks?'

"I have my receipt. We bought them on November 6, 2002."

'When did you sell the doublewide?'

"In February 2003."

(Wondering why in HELL the customer decided to wait so long to decide she didn't need the ten skids of brick.)

And no, we don't take it back if you have it sitting out in the weather for two full years.

[LoZoccolo]

1. Oh I can give you much worse than that.

A woman called to say she purchased 8 bras, and wanted to return them. I couldn't find her order on my computer, I asked her when she purchased them.

http://www.customerssuck.com/cs/?m=show&id=145

[auntAgonist]

2. Ummm ... we didn't

elect Shrub 4 years ago and we still don't want him, can we return him?



great stories btw :)


O8)

[jmowreader]

6. There's that poem "I Took Him Back to Wal-Mart"

about the woman who wanted to get rid of her no-good husband and succeeded by returning him to Wal-Mart because they'll accept anything.

Which has fucked up the rest of the retail industry, I'm here to tell ya. Because Wal-Mart will accept anything no matter what it is, every other store is expected to do the same thing. I have had to teach my associates to be sure the price tag is on the piece they're going to use when they cut lumber because customers will get a piece of wood cut, use the part they're gonna use, then return the scrap for a full refund if the price tag is on it. The term is fraudulent return and it's a felony, but only if the cashier is smart enough to catch you doing it.

[miss_kitty]

8. Nordstrom started it n/t

[Pale_Rider]

3. Buy them back at half price ...

... especially if they had weathered nicely. You could sell them again at more than the doubled price.

Customers can be loonies at times ...

[jmowreader]

4. We thought of that, but it's something we can't do

Home Depot works through approved vendors, and in my district the approved brick vendor is Triangle Brick. We can only buy brick from them.

It's been tried, though--about once a week or so, a fly-by-night installer who bought vinyl siding from Norandex Reynolds or Lowe's to do a job will show up offering to sell the remaining material to us. (For some reason, it's always vinyl siding.) We turn them all away.

[flamingyouth]

5. I've had stuff like this happen

"Can I return these dinner plates? I've been using them for three years, and there are knife scratches on them."

Or the very wealthy, well-known local woman whose daughter got married... she bought a cake topper then returned it a week later... with frosting on it. She claimed they never used it. :eyes:

[eyesroll]

7. I used to work at Kids R Us

"I washed this once and it shrunk, can I have a refund?" (Receipt dated two years ago.)
"My kid outgrew these shoes; can I exchange them?"
"This clearly says 'stain-resistant,' and yet, my child vomited up a mixture of india ink and syrup of ipecac and it won't budge."

I once received a return, in pristine condition, with the tags still on it. No receipt. When I looked up the SKU, I found that the SKU was so old it had been re-assigned. :eyes:

And then there's always:
"I'm attending a shower and I don't know the sex; can I buy one in pink and one in blue if she'll return one later?"
Answer: "Yes. Here's a gift receipt."
Desired answer: "Newborns don't get gender confusion from wearing the wrong color."

[Dookus]

9. At my local

"adult" store, I witnessed a big fight between a customer and a clerk when the customer tried to return a vibrator because she found it to be "too loud".

[ps1074]

11. LOL

But it is a perfectly new vibrator. I've been using it for only 2 years. And yes, it is working fine... so, will you please take it back?

I can imagine the scene...

What are you doing in an ADULT store anyway? :)

[Phillycat]

10. Oh dear god, flashbacks to the high school years working at the Gap.

the pain! the pain!

[CO Liberal]

12. I Used to Work The Service Desk at KMart

And we'd get all sorts of requests like that.

I remember one elderly couple who brought in a Sunbeam hand mixer - it stopped working and they wanted a new one. Based on the design of the body, it looked like it had been manufactured in the Early '60s. They seemed surprised when I told them they couldn't exchange it. They demanded to talk to the store manager, who told them the same thing.

The requests like that were everyday occurrences when I worked at the Kmart in Henderson, NV - people would go through their homes to find stuff to return to get money to spend in the casinos. I had people try to return the batteries out of their cars, and clothes their kids had already worn. We even had signs posted throughout the store, saying that no Halloween costumes could be returned after October 31st - people would try to return them for cash on November 1st.

[bif]

13. I've got some cottage cheese ffrom the late 90s

Can I return it? It's pretty spoiled.

[skygazer]

14. Then there are the ones who don't buy the stuff at all

I work at a grocery store. We have some serial thieves. They come in, pocket an item, then take it directly to the checkstand and try to get a refund without a receipt. Most of the time, they're so obvious that it's laughable. It's always a small, high ticket item, like saffron or something.

We also get "rain check abuse". Yes, it's amazing what lengths people will go to in order to get something for less than retail. I had one guy come in when I worked the wine dept. who wanted a rain check for some wine I had on sale for $5.99 (reg. $10.99). I gave him one for 6 bottles which is the limit.

He then went to every checkstand and got another raincheck. Some of them were for 2 or 3 cases (the checkers never check on the limits). He came in for weeks after this with rain checks, getting wine. We finally caught him one day when he pulled them all out at the check stand. We confiscated them but he kept trying to do the same or similar things. "You had this on sale last week. Can I get it at the sale price now?" "No, it's not on sale now."

This guy is filthy rich, too. Probably because he pinches his pennies so tight, they scream for mercy. Probably rummages in dumpsters too.

[YellowRubberDuckie]

15. My dad was pretty bad about this.

We had a bug zapper. He'd go back and get a new one every summer because WalMart apparently has a bunch of schmucks working for them. He just thought they were supposed to do this. It was hilarious. God rest his soul.
Duckie