Rant: The American Dream has become my nightmare

[AlienGirl]

When I was a kid, I was raised with the idea that if you work hard, stay honest, and try your best you'll make your way in life. That was the American Dream, after all.

Not surprisingly, I bought into the other side of that, too--if you just can't make it, you've done something wrong; you either aren't working hard, or aren't working smart, or you've made some really bad decisions.

I made some bad decisions, I guess. Like the decision to trust a man who said "...in sickness and in health..." Like the decision to stay home with the children I had with him. And finally, like the decision to have the audacity to get cancer.

Now it's years since he left me and moved to the other side of the continent with my kids. I'm working a retail job for just above minimum wage, and haven't gotten a raise every six months like I was promised; but I don't dare complain because there are so many people without jobs who'd be glad to have mine. Every day I wait on impatient women wearing diamonds who look down their noses at me. I will never own a house, probably never be able to retire, and I can't afford to fly the kids here to visit me this summer.

I'm exhausted and cranky from a day spent explaining to customers that the sales in the paper weren't in the computer yet so everyone was slowed down by having to hand-enter the sale prices. I worked until 11:20 tonight, and I need to be back at work at 8:00 tomorrow morning.

Please wake me from this American Dream.

Tucker

[WindRavenX]

1. The American Dream is dying

AlienGirl, what you are going through is NOT the American Dream. The American Dream started to die when corporations could enslave workers by paying them barely above min. wage- enough to keep them from fleeing, but not enough to ever, ever be secure.
Hang in there :hug:

[physioex]

2. I completely agree...

Hello fellow Seattleite... :hi:

Wasn't the last two days the hottest?? :grr:

I have noticed soo many people in the Seattle area in this board..

[NightTrain]

3. Look at it this way: at least you HAVE a job. I don't!

Be that as it may, I fully understand what you mean about working your butt off and still not being able to make ends meet. When my job ended earlier this month, I was making $10.50 an hour as a delivery driver--which isn't bad money for a college drop-out. But even with no one to support but myself, I couldn't make ends meet on my wages. And because my hours varied from day to day, I couldn't get a second job to help augment my income. Besides, after a typical workday, I was fucking exhausted!

As of July 2nd, I no longer had that job. The owner sold the drugstore's prescription accounts to Stop & Shop, which doesn't make deliveries. So I was out the door, albeit with five weeks of severance and vacation pay.

My second severance check came in the mail on Thursday. I have three more weeks of pay left before I have to think about applying for Unemployment benefits--and, incidentally, before my medical insurance expires and the price of my anti-depressants goes through the roof. I don't know how much my weekly Unemployment checks will be, but I guarantee you there won't be enough money for me to buy those pills--which I really, really need!

So Tucker, for whatever it's worth, at least you're not alone in your status as one of America's working poor. We're all in this together, right? :pals:

[physioex]

4. Ok..I have read your post completely...

Ok you seem to be facing problems on several levels. First on a personal then an economic level.

As far as the economy goes, the blue collar jobs have been steadly moving out of this coutry since the early 80's. The dream of working hard for good pay and a middle class life is simply gone. You must have skills that cannot be outsourced to earn a liveable wage going forward. I work in the high tech industy and still there is no job security as many jobs are being sent overseas at an alarming rate. And even much more rapidly than the blue collar jobs.

As far a personal issues goes, I see you facing cancer and had problems with your relationship. There is simply no way to predict in life the challenges, and I hope you put up a good fight....

[regnaD kciN]

6. But which are those...?

You must have skills that cannot be outsourced to earn a liveable wage going forward.

Manufacturing skills won't cut it -- they've been offshored long ago.

High-tech won't make it, either, as it's just as easy to pay a programmer (much less) in India as in Silicon Valley.

Ironically, although Tucker's job may suck, she may have more job security than a twenty-year veteran of the software industry with a Master's in Computer Science. Until they have SalesClerkBots with a lower amortized cost-per-hour than minimum wage, service workers should be able to keep their (crappy) jobs.

So, the question arises: What jobs are relatively immune from off-shoring, and still pay decently? Plumbers, I would guess, and possibly home electricians. Auto mechanics. You know...the sort of jobs our parents urged us to get a college degree so that we wouldn't have to stoop to once we were grown up...

:(

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

12. Any of the 2-year medical field jobs....

X-ray, Lab, various types of therapy, Sonography

kind of hard to outsource those.

[Dogmudgeon]

5. I'm having a similar experience

I don't think it's quite as bad -- I never got married (which is a source of anxiety all its own but I'm also happy I don't have children who depend on me) and my own bout with cancer wasn't nearly as bad as yours.

But the basic story is the same: I worked my ass off, lost my shirt, and wonder why the hell I ever developed a god-damned "work ethic". Several people made considerable money off of my efforts along the way, too. May they choke on every penny.

These days, I have almost no work. I'm going for a contract this week which should bring in some cash for several months, but as soon as the medical collection agencies find out, they'll demand payment for services rendered under a contract of insurance from a company that fortuitously went out of business before the executives lost any of "their own" money.

I stay at home most of the time looking after my mother and grandmother. My mother had been diagnosed with lung cancer, but lo and behold, A Mistake Was Made. She lost half her right lung, but there was no cancer. She's getting better, though. My grandmother, who was 91 this week, is probably dying of congestive heart failure, and I have had to spend more and more time keeping her from killing herself, since she still thinks she is superwoman.

And in a way, I'm happy that I have no social life, since I'd probably not like to hear the usual hard-work-and-blind-faith-in-George-and-Jesus lecture.

There's lots more to the story, too, but I just don't like dwelling on it. Suffice it to say that I am not too pleased with the way the American Dream turned into a long-term state of sleep paralysis for me.

Well, not all hope is lost, and I'm sure that things will start going better for me at some point. For one thing, that programming contract looks pretty good; though I dread the day I go in to wake up my grandmother and she's cold and blue-gray and died in her sleep.

I have no idea why I didn't give it up myself long ago. Like I said, no wife, no kids, no compelling reason to do anything. I suppose I'm just stubborn, or hyperactive, and I never liked alcohol anyway.

Good luck, AlienGirl. You're not alone. The financial engine of our world now depends on sucking the lifeblood out of its servants, so our numbers will continue to grow ... ten thousand every day ... a Nation of Losers who will someday soon be ruled by a small elite of super-rich human sharks.

And like the piscine sharks, they'd better keep moving.

--bkl

[mhr]

7. Alien Girl You Will Appreciate My Letter To The Kerry Campaign

Dear Mr Kerry,

I used to believe in the American dream - stay out of trouble, get an
education, serve your country, and work hard with success virtually
guaranteed.

I used to believe that this country was for everyone not just the
wealthy and powerful.

I used to believe that our institutions mattered and that they
represented a tradition of honesty and integrity not a haven for
partisan politics and special interests.

I used to believe that we could make a difference in the world by
example not through lies, threats, torture and war.

I no longer believe.

Now unemployed for four years, I have come to understand that
America is a sham, nothing more than a racket for the ultra-wealthy
to extract their pound of flesh from people like myself. Once exploited,
we become little more than roadkill on the corporate super highway
- discarded like yesterday's news.

The America that I grew up believing in is dead, replaced by cabal of
avarice, deceit and deception all designed to benefit those who have
at the expense of those that have not.

I honestly don't know you Mr. Kerry and can say that you are not
speaking to the issue that matters most to me, a fair and equitable
America.

A nation that understands we are stronger when all
citizens share the fruits of our collective work and sacrifice. A nation
that emphasizes our shared experience and beliefs. An America that puts
people before profits, nation before corporation, and society before
economy.

Maybe you can make a change. I hope that to be true.

Many of us would like to believe again.

Sincerely,

MHR

[jukes]

8. Aliengirl

That's a very tough haul. please know you have friends here that care for you.




:grouphug:


EDIT: love your avatar!

[izzie]

9. First of all some are more equal than others. Yar Animal Farm

We have never had a classless society but one that was more classless than what we came from. Look at the history. WASP have run this country right up in to the 60's and JFK was the first that put a man in high office that was not a WASP. Wasp meant men. Women rights came late.Their has always been an American dream but you have to put it into the system. Poor, blacks, women etc. have to work harder to make it. Do not be to unhappy as most places in the world they can not ever make it, and here you can even if it is hard. In the 50's most women thought them self less than men but my sister and I were brought us as equals to men and what hell that has been. Other women my age (70) have had the same thing to fight. It will get better as it has my whole life.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

10. If you need some respite

go to a Dances of Universal Peace meeting. Nothing to join, all are welcome, and it can make you feel better. Know there are quite a few Dancers in Seattle area-tell them Ayesha from Arkansas sent you.

Understand your feelings-my husband has been in ill health, has lost jobs, was denied unemployment because the company lied about his character. I work for $7.50 an hour, glad to have the work, though there are no benefits.

[SarahB]

11. There are two things

First economic ones. It royally sucks, but in this day and age, the economy is so different and so screwed, people with degrees, both undergrad and graduate have a tough time making ends meet. I'm currently looking for a job, but I couldn't make enough to make ends meet on my own and have a place for myself and the children if I were to leave my less-than-happy marriage (the extent of things I don't even want to go into) while continuing to work on my second degree in nursing just so I'll probably (barely) be able to stay afloat on my own. My husband is a medical professional, degreed with extra credentials, now a department manager in his field and we scrape by with that- no real vacations, small house, no extras, or anything, so I was able to be there for the past few years with the children.

Secondly, is what you had to go through personally. Your ex-husband did you wrong. Really wrong. Sometimes marriages don't work out for whatever reason, but for one parent to basically cut the other out of their children's lives when not only did they do nothing wrong, but when they were completely vulnerable because they were sick is pretty terrible. You didn't deserve this for one second and it breaks my heart to think about how I would feel if I were in your shoes. I don't want to imagine the ache you feel every day. There are no words except I'm sorry. You're a good person and I hope one day your life is able to change in a way for the better. :hug: