I'm a Moran (With apologies to Denis Leary) R Rated

[politicat]

Everyone needs a filk once in a while.

Sung to the tune of A$$hole by Denis Leary.

Moran -

Folks, I’d like to sing you a song about my American dream. It’s about me, and me, and the way Unka Dick’s heart doesn’t beat down way down in the bottom of his chest. About that special feeling I get in the cockles of my heart when I burn some brush, or skip out on my daughters, or drink that extra six-pack when no one’s looking. It’s so cool that the Secret Service puts my Coors in O’Doul’s bottles. But anyway, This is my American dream.

I’m just spoiled rich kid with a kick-ass cool job,
your average white, elitist rich snob.
I like pu$$y and Condi and f#$%ing up wars.
I’ve got a pisser big house where I can drink up my Coors.

My wife is a lump, my kids are drunk tarts,
And Unka Dick lets me light off my farts.

But sometimes that just ain’t enough to keep a man like me Interested,
no way.
No, I’ve gotta go out and have fun at someone else’s expense,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.....

I pick stupid fights in in my Daddy’s name,
and fix so the liberals get all of the blame!

I’m a Moran
I’m a Moran

I use god and jesus for my political ends
I hand out tax cuts to my richest best friends

I’m a Moran
I’m a Moran

Sometimes I stutter and fall of my bike
While Pickles is sweeping and chewing down Vic(oden)

Maybe I shouldn’t be screwing this land
Praying and bombing and scare-mongering on
Maybe they’re right when they tell me I’m canned...

Naaah!

I’m a Moran
I’m a Moran

Know what I’m gonna do? i’m gonna get myself an Aircraft carrier, a big one, and I’m gonna land on it and hand out plastic turkeys and lay-offs and recession! I’m gonna fly onto that thing like I know what I’m doing and declare Mission Accomplished! I’m gonna find Osama Bin Laden in that hole we’ve been keeping him in like a Where’s Waldo fanatic and I’m gonna trot him out and say “Here! This is the guy!” And while I’m doing that, sucking the oil out of Iraq to feed a bunch of my friends’ Hummers, and wiping my ass with the Constitution, I’m gonna screw up the schools and privatize the military and there ain’t a goddam thing anybody can do about it. You know why? Because I’ve got the bombs, and the Supreme Court, and John Ashcroft and Diebold. Two words: Me, and me! Okay, Iraq, Iran, North Korea, all of those Axis of Evil states, They can have all of the oil they want until I want it more. Cuz it won’t make a lick of difference, because I’ve got the bombs, OK? Those liberals can email and blog and protest, but I’ve got the bombs. Unka Dick doesn’t have a heart, and he’s pretty wound up about it. I’m gonna get Unka Dick and Rummy and Johnny and Jeb and Condi on desk duty and we’re gonna get a case of Whiskey and drive to Texas --

I’m a Moran
I’m a Moran
M-O-O-R-R-A-N
M-O-R-R-A-A-N

I’m a Moran and I’m proud of it.


(don't ask. I don't know where this came from.)

Politicat

[yorgatron]

1. excellent

now all you gotta do is get it to dennis,think he'd sing it?