Last Saturday I cut my arm….Today major infection….

[The Lone Liberal]

When the injury occurred I performed field surgery and moved on. Today noticed that things were not as they should be, the forearm was bright red and I was harboring one of those dreamy fevers where you hallucinate conversing on Cartesian theory with Andy Devine.

I say to myself, “hey, this isn’t right,” and hi myself to Yorick the Barber for leeching. The upshot is infection. Having read the most recent scientific papers I was almost sure that I had contracted “Flesh-eating Virus!!” The sawbones discounted anything that appeared in the National Enquirer, he opined that it lacked validity. I still am unconvinced it isn’t a flesh eating virus. I have been watching now for several hours and cannot detect any perceptible loss of flesh…they may just be waiting until I go to sleep…..

Anyone else suffer from illnesses diagnosed at the check counter?

Oh, yea….. Rather than treat me for flesh eating virus, the doc went ape shit over tetanus shot….. Must be getting some payola for that…….

[flowomo]

1. Sorry about the wound, but what I really want to know is.....

what exactly did Andy Devine say?

[The Lone Liberal]

4. Andy was very eloquent and erudite.

Sadly his linguistic skills were employed on behalf of some sugar coated breakfast cereal and the star system at MGM.

[flowomo]

5. Yeah, Old Jingles had his hobby horses....

n/t

[greatauntoftriplets]

2. Are you now on antibiotics?

Or did he have to amputate?

[madmax]

3. Next time use Neosporin a.s.a.p. n/t

[Th1onein]

6. Go to the feed store and buy some dimethyl sulfoxide

Mix it half and half with distilled water, soak some clean white sterile gauze in the solution and put it on the cut (don't use any tape to hold it there), for thirty minutes. It will heal completely in about two or three days.

[greatauntoftriplets]

7. Check your inbox,

PLEASE!!!