Paintball "Facts" A Tribute to Cliff Claven

[name not needed]

It's a little known fact that paintball was not a game or meant to be fun when it first began. It actually started in ancient Summarian times and has its roots in the slave culture. It was used as a means by slave owners to "prompt" slaves they thought were lazy or slacking off on the field. Back then the balls were not propelled by CO2 or compressed air but rather by the sheer power of the human lung. Markers looked very different also as they were fashioned out of bamboo rods or weeds. In fact, with the exception of their widened diameter, they closely resembled blow darts used by other societies. What the slave owners realized, however, after killing and maiming their "property" was that it would be more effective and productive to induce certain levels of pain without causing permanent injury.*

add your own clavenesque half truths.










* Name Not Needed, nor the creators of this website endorse any ideology presented here as fact or make any representations to support it as such. This thread is intended solely for the purpose of entertainment. Objects may appear larger than they are. Do not operate heavy machinery while reading this thread.