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I was sitting there waiting for the test to begin, when of course the obvious subject came up.
Iraq.
Not even a second passed as I heard every single young person there exclaim, they hated the war. They thought it was stupid. They were all young, I was 23, the oldest 25, the youngest, 17. United, together, in their detest for this war.
One, 22 was asked, do you vote? His response, no. It's all rigged with this electoral college thing. It doesn't matter if I vote or not. Some guy up in washington will just tell the college to change the vote and the state will go red. I wish I had the courage to tell him his vote mattered, but I didn't. I'll blame it on being too polite. Blame it on not having a opening into the conversation with the other young much louder people. Always the quiet one I was. Doesn't excuse my cowardice, my failure to do the right thing when it was needed. Maybe I'll change if I join the Navy. Maybe not. But at least I recognise it, that's a start.
11 people took the test that day. 7 white, 4 black. As we drove towards the center we passed the national guard barracks. There was a bus there. There were old people, all standing outside, like they were wishing people goodbye, safe journey. Don't get killed, you're going to Iraq. I don't know why they were there, I just noticed that nobody else seemed to notice. To care.
Maybe I can console myself, tell myself that this election will be voted in by the people whose children are sent off to die in Iraq. Whose children come home with cancer from powdered uranium. Whose Children come home and can't sleep at night because of the post traumatic stress.
I went with two people that day. The other scored a 36, 1 point above passing. I scored a 99. I know I'll be safe. We'll just have to wait and see what happens to the others. Why am I thinking of joining? Because at this point, I have nothing left I can do. No job, living off of my girlfreind. No employment prospects. No recovery in sight. It is my last choice, we'll see if it is a good one.
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