Reply #12: I saw this piece...

[dkf]

Boehner has also cried while talking about “providing for the safety and security of the American people” during a debate over Iraq War funding. He has cried during his acceptance of a pro-life award while talking about the fact that his parents had 12 children. He has cried, in other words, while talking about values. His are moral tears, if you will.

As it turns out, this doesn’t break any new ground in terms of gender rules. That’s because, according to Marianne LaFrance, a social psychologist at Yale, while women crying for a whole variety of reasons is socially sanctioned (albeit not in professional settings), there is one type of crying that men engage in far more often than women. It’s crying for the sake of sentimentality.

“Women seldom cry when they’re feeling sentimental,” LaFrance says. “Men are more likely to.” LaFrance calls this crying over “flag, apple pie, children and family…It’s more a value : ‘These are the things I care about and watch me being caring.’” (Another sentimental cause: football games. Women don’t usually cry over football games. Men do.)

Sentimentality is not a core emotion like sadness or anger. A man crying from core emotions might be seen as weak and ineffectual. But Boehner crying from the strength of his convictions works out for him because it implies “that he comes from really good stock,” LaFrance says. Which is not to say he’s doing it on purpose – just that all of us unconsciously absorb what type of crying is permissible for us and what type isn’t.

http://www.doublex.com/blog/xxfactor/boehners-manly-tears