Reply #53: It depends on the kids

[laundry_queen]

Some kids innately sense that they should stick by their parents while their parents are distracted. Other kids don't have that same sense. I had 3 of the former and one of the latter (my first, thank god so I only had to worry about 1). My first would take off every chance she got. The *nanosecond* my brain would wander while I was shopping (gee, I wonder if the pink one is the same price) she was gone. Same when we went for walks. I was late in my second pregnancy and I would walk every day. My (now ex) husband sometimes watched my oldest while I walked but once he wasn't home and I took my daughter with me since I figured she could use the exercise as well. I was holding her hand and she wriggled free and took off. She refused to come back, she thought it was a game, starting running across roads (thankfully in a very small town residential area with practically no traffic) and I was waddling as fast as I could go, screaming her name. I finally caught up to her when she was distracted by a caterpillar on the sidewalk. I never brought her again without a stroller. She was nearly 3 at the time. She once did the same in a parking lot (wriggled free the second I loosed my grip a little) and nearly got hit by a car. I wish I would have had a leash but I was so worried about 'what would people think'.

When I had my second, I was completely floored at how she would just follow me and stick by me, all the time. I didn't even have to hold her hand. With my first, I used to hold her wrist, because she was so good at wriggling free. My second, and third and fourth were all like little ducklings, just following me where I went. They very rarely took advantage of my lack of attention. I'm not sure why my first wasn't like that. I really think most kids are NOT like my first just by reason of evolution - offspring that took off in a forest, for instance, would be lost very quickly. So unless you've had a kids like that, it's hard to understand the need for 'leashes' and strollers. Although, like anything, some parents abuse it and are too lazy to teach their kids how to behave in public and corral them in a stroller instead. But just because you see an older child in a stroller doesn't mean the parents are using it to keep the child in check - my youngest, now 4 years old, loves her stroller when we are shopping because she gets bored, and tired (since she is small for her age). This way, she can look at her books, or even play kids games on my iPod while I shop. She often naps in it. She hates going shopping without her stroller, although she is capable of shopping without it, when I bring it, it is a more pleasant experience for both of us.