Reply #164: I have PTSD. I have mentioned it on these boards before.

[FedUpWithIt All]

It is often too difficult for me to include myself in new social setting unless a gesture is made to make me feel at ease. Like i said, everyone has their own issues. Mine can be debilitating socially. I was often placed in high violence situations as a child. Now i can be quite hesitant and shy in many unknown social situations. For me a gentle gesture of inclusion and welcome lowers my stress level significantly. It signals that the atmosphere is friendly, calm and non-aggressive. When my partner and i go out to unfamiliar crowded places i nearly ALWAYS hang back and wait for him to lead me. Not because of patriarchal BS but because it takes me some time to acclimate myself.

It is clear that both you and i are speaking from our own experiences and those experiences are very real to each of us. BOTH are legitimate.

I will clarify that the gesture of escorting is not the same as an unwelcome hug. We are speaking of the lightest touch, if in fact there even is a touch. Often it is simply a hand behind a person with no touch involved. It is also a behavior offered by BOTH genders TO BOTH genders. If we were to go into a wider range of social behaviors we might both end up agreeing about line crossing. I was commenting on the OP's observation only.