Reply #57: Something I like to tell people:

[Dr Morbius]

In a nation founded upon the principle of free speech, OF COURSE WORDS MATTER!

Duh!

I recall once a coworker complain about an inventory control system I developed. I asked him what was wrong. He said, "It's so GAY!" I mentally began counting to ten and asked him quietly if he could offer something more constructive, and confine his comments in the future to that which was constructive. It worked; I never heard that guy again use the phrase.

But then, when I lower my voice, strangely, people take me more seriously. Kinda weird, that. It's like a "command voice" that I have. My father was an Air Force sergeant; his "command voice" was altogether different (kinda scary, too, when you're a kid!). I wonder where I got that quiet voice.

So that's what I do. Someone uses the word "lame" or "gay" in a derogatory way, I ask them for something more constructive. Stressing the idea of constructiveness helps, I think. Don't get me started on the "R" word, either, also frequently used as a derogatory word.

It's like some people need to look down on someone, so they decide this group or that is defective. I hate it.