I had 2 Mormons knock at my door yesterday.

[Are_grits_groceries]

I let them talk for about a minute, and then I interrupted. I told them that I had read about a lot of religions including theirs.
I had considered it one of the many of the different religions in this country. I told them I had had a big change of mind after
the Prop 8 vote in CA.

I said since their religion had made it a point to get in my business, I was now going to do my best to get in theirs. I was going to start
by writing God and everybody to ask that their tax exempt status be removed. I also reported them to Homeland Security because I believed
they were trying to subvert the Constitution and turn America into a theocracy.

I also said that I had contacted a lawyer and the FBI to have any info about me removed from their genealogical project. I said I thought
their claim to want to retroactively baptize people was a front to collect info for nefarious purposes. I wanted every syllable about me and
my family removed from their records.

Then I told them to get their magic underwear wearing, gold plate believing, Osmond listening, Oz temple going, skinny necktie wearing selves off
my doorstep and never come back. If they did I would have them arrested for trespassing, and I was going to call local law enforcement right then
to report them as weird looking, neat people who were spying on the city and might be up to no good. They should be checked to see if they had any
gasoline and fertilizer residue on them.

At least I didn't cuss at them.