Reply #17: I appreciate your sensitive response

[lukasahero]

I guess the point in your OP that struck a nerve (therefore feeling the need to explain our situation) is that of being prepared to take on the consequences of one's actions. Our actions have been thoughtful and careful but, let's be honest, accidents do happen. What then?

I worry about the implication that if one has sex, they have to be prepared to raise a child even when they have taken all the necessary precautions to avoid an unwanted pregnancy. The suggestion seems to be that my husband and I shouldn't have sex if we don't want children.

(Getting ready to be called a prude here but...) I do believe that folks should stop having sex with people they don't even know well enough to ask the question "what happens if..." But I also know that there are a lot of situations in life that don't fit as neatly into these categories. Not everyone has the same access to information and protection we did. Not everyone has control over their situation to the degree that we did.

I don't believe anyone likes to be put in a decision of having to choose an abortion but I do think that we have to understand that the right exists to protect both the people who find themselves in that situation and the potential child that may come of it. "Every child a wanted child" is a good maxim.