President Determined to Drive Approval Rating Down to Zero

[Coexist]

Andy Borowitz: Bush Vows to Alienate Remaining Pockets of Support

http://yubanet.com/artman/publish/article_32055.shtml
<snip>
In a nationally televised address from the White House last night, President George W. Bush announced several bold new initiatives designed specifically to alienate his remaining pockets of support.

Acknowledging that his approval rating currently hovers around forty percent, the president told his national television audience, "I will not rest until I have driven that number down to zero."

Mr. Bush said that his recent decision to let a company based in the United Arab Emirates take control of key American ports was "an important step" in alienating the few Americans who still support him.

But the president said he began implementing his plan to drive away millions of supporters three years ago, with the invasion of Iraq: "Based on the approval numbers I now have, all I can say is, mission accomplished."


:rofl: