Reply #2: Bless you....

[OneGrassRoot]

Thank you for understanding what I'm struggling with, IHAD. :hug:

I also am not criticizing those who feel whatever they feel. Most of us here realize we haven't walked in the other person's shoes, and that there are no doubt valid reasons for feeling as they do.

We all have a right to our feelings. I'm just trying to find my way in working within this dynamic of trying to understand (and, when applicable, be of service) yet not being able to ask questions freely.

This is a huge lesson for me now...it's not a trivial thing at all, as it's impacting very critical aspects of my life and I'm trying to....understand. ;)

Yet it's that desire to understand that is what is causing a problem, so it seems.

I do understand that sometimes we simply want someone to listen...not to respond, not to ask questions, not to try to fix things. I do indeed "get" that.

I suppose it's the nature (or my interpretation) of online forums for me to be predisposed to feel interaction is a positive thing, so long as it's respectful. And I certainly realize that even at a forum such as this we can post something and say, "I'm not looking for replies or suggestions...just silent support and a space for me to vent is all that is wanted."

I'm not referring to those types of posts.

I refer to sharings (and this isn't just forum posts but also on the phone, in email, in person...myriad ways of interacting) in which someone seems (perhaps that's my error?) to be attempting to share in order to educate or enlighten others who may be ready.

And, because I am interested in what is shared, yet don't really "get" it, I ask questions.

Then the person seems to feel they are having to defend whatever he/she has shared, when that is definitely not my intention at all. In such instances, I'm merely a humble seeker, yet I seem to have caused pain by the act of asking questions.

I do apologize if that's the case for anyone reading.

I'm bringing this up because I'm very serious when I say I find myself in a huge vortex of confusion about this...not knowing how to interact with anyone, yet communication having always been so very important to me.

I do wish we'd all hurry up and be purely psychic so these thorny communication issues will go away. ;) For now, at least, it feels they are more difficult and dicey than ever. :(

Thanks again, IHAD, and to anyone else reading my ramble today.

:grouphug: