Reply #110: The Problem is, You Want to Compartmentalize Everyone.

[Toasterlad]

I'm 100% gay. I've never been sexually attracted to a woman in my life. Does the same hold true for every other gay man on the planet? Who would be obnoxious enough to say so? Who would say, "I don't care what you say, if you've ever fondled a woman's tits, you're not gay!" NO ONE would ever say that. How, then, can you tell people who are telling YOU who they are, that they're wrong and you're right? Don't you see how disrespectful that is? We don't want people interfering with our right to be who we are; how then can we interfere with another's right to be who THEY are?

Yes, there are some men who are just afraid to come out of the closet. But saying that every man who's engaged in a little teenage boy on boy action, however innocent (from all-guy strip poker games all the way to mutual masturbation) is at least bi is preposterous. Despite what they'd admit to, it's very NORMAL for boys growing to manhood to fool around a little bit with each other. It doesn't usually mean they're fucking each other, but they're doing things you would definitely categorize as gay. I have no data on it, but I'd be surprised if the same isn't true for girls. None of this makes anyone GAY. It makes them CURIOUS.

If you accept the premise that a majority of hetero teens have at least one same-sex experience on the way to adulthood (and you should, because I believe it's true. ;) ), why would it be hard to believe that there are some men and women who are still open to experimentation into their 20's, or 30's, or beyond? Just because it's not something you or I can relate to, doesn't make it impossible. Everyone is unique.

I know you want the world to accept gay people as people just like everyone else, but you can't get to that point by shoving people into compartments and declaring them GAY/BI/STRAIGHT. Human diversity demands more from all of us.