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Reply #62: Do yourself a favor and move out at the first opportunity. Please. [View All]

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AngryOldDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jun-22-08 11:17 AM
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62. Do yourself a favor and move out at the first opportunity. Please.
And I speak as someone who moved out of the family nest at 27, kept at home all that time from a perceived responsibility toward a parent. It's a difficult situation, an adult child (and that is what you are to her) living with a parent. BTDT, and then some. So, while I may not be part of the inner circle who knows all the bloody details of your situation (written as a disclaimer to anyone who will call me a heartless bitch), I think I can speak from some experience of what you are going through.

Until you're back out on your own, sit down with her and have a meeting of the minds as to what the basic ground rules are as it concerns both you and her. She needs to give you some leeway as an adult; you need to recognize and respect her home. The road runs both ways.

One other thing: The term you use to describe your mother. I'm frankly shocked that others would support you in that sentiment, given the overall sensitivity to its use in any other context here. As bad as your situation is, keep in mind that you *do* have a roof over your head. I have seen many people in your place suddenly made homeless because their families would not do squat for them. So as pithy as it sounds -- it could be worse. Really, if it's so untenable, get out.

If circumstances beyond your control are keeping you there, all the more reason to come to some kind of detente with Mom -- for your sanity as well as hers. For the short term, at any rate, it's looking like you **will** have to find some way to deal with this shit. So do so.

Good luck.
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