Bosox Crush Underdog Rockies in Game 1

[alcibiades_mystery]

Wow. The Red Sox put on a clinic tonight, crushing the upstart Rockies under their giant heels like pesky bugs. One almost got the feeling that they stopped scoring midgame out of some respect, like all those lessons in the Mercy Rule learned in little league worked as an ethic tonight. Until that point, they just kicked sand in the face of the puny Rockies until the whole beach laughed. Stomped 'em, as predicted. In any case, the oddsmakers in Vegas are probably nodding, as the game went just as expected: the deep underdog Rockies destroyed by the best pitcher in baseball from the team with the best record and second highest payroll in baseball.

A bruising, dominant victory for the favored Bosox.