Reply #15: I went through this

[yankeepants]

When I knew I was not going to be able to handle my mother any longer I had to do something. It came down to her or me keeping what was left of our wits.

The idea of keeping your mom out a nursing home for three years may not be realistic. I understand the economics believe me. I found an affordable adult home (different than nursing home)that worked with me on a monthly price that was the equivalent of my mom's SS and her pension. The staff was very good at helping me get her in there and making her feel at home.

In the meantime, like the others said, do not respond to her rages. Walk away. The staff at the home also taught me that lying to them is essential. Whatever is necessary to ease their minds, do it.

It was for me the most difficult times of my life. Wishing you peace.