Reply #5: I've only spoken with my (step)father once in the last 20 yrs or so...

[mike_c]

...and that occasion was over a decade ago. I didn't so much "cut off" contact as simply stop initiating it. I have little to say to him and haven't missed the contact in the least. I hadn't spoken with him more than a couple of times in the 10 years before that. We have virtually nothing in common other than shared memories of an embarassingly dysfunctional family, so there's no reason to feel any particular loss.

I've recently restored communication with my mother, who finally left the old goat and is living with a dear friend in another city. I'm glad for her, and glad to have her at least somewhat back in my life, but after 30 years of very sporadic communication it's hard to get back into the habit.