***IMAGINE*** this Bill Clinton scenario, won't you???

[Bluebear]

How would it be reported? What would be the outcome?

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"Welcome back to DayTime, I'm your hostess, Lydia Fester. Well, today's big news as you know is the continuing Hookergate scandal, only the latest to plague this already very controversial Clintoon administration. SOME PEOPLE ARE SAYING that the filth runs wide, and it runs deep.

Astute bloggers were fascinated when one tantalizing clue was left on a blog, "FrenziedAmerica.com" last night. We'll show that to you now, do we have a shot of that, Phil?



Yes, that's it, thanks Phil, so the question is: Is this a tittilating glance into what has been going on behind closed doors at the White House before our very eyes? How did a known dominatrix prostitute receive White House press credentials? It's a question ALL Americans want to know the answers to!

Let's start our coverage with a well-known blogger and owner of her own publishing firm, Lucyemma Goldfarb. Lucyemma, welcome back to DayTime with Lydia Fester!

(audience applause)



GOLDFARB: He...(more applause) hello, Linda. Thank you. Thank you all. Good to be here.

FESTER: No, thank YOU Lucyemma. You were the first to break this sordid saga of prostitution, the White House, total access to the President...Some are saying that this is a bit "unseemly", to go after someone's personal life like this. Tell me, does this story have legs?

GOLDFARB: (throaty laugh) Hoo, boy, does it have legs. Lydia, it stopped being personal when this tramp received her White House press pass from Joe Lockhart. She sat in that press room, tossing easy questions at President Clintoon which HUMILIATED Newt Gingrich and Trent Lott, two patriotic Americans, and SOME PEOPLE ARE SAYING that the President had full knowledge of this, and full knowledge that she was a dominatrix prostitute who sold her "services" online.

(audience applause)

FESTER: Well, OK, to be fair, Lucyemma, there is no evidence that Clintoon had knowledge of her, shall we say, real profession, is there?

GOLDFARB: Lydia. There. Is. No. Way. In. Hell. That he couldn't have known...

(audience applause)

She was there!! Sitting there in the Press Conference!! Right there!!! Lydia, don't you think these people get background checks? Don't you think if you are sitting ten feet from the President you are thoroughly vetted and checked out? (Disgusted) Of course he knew!

(audience applause)

FESTER: Thanks, Lucyemma, something tells me this story is only just beginning. For more on this, we have brought in our senior anchor, Brent Scrume.

(wild applause)



FESTER: Brent, this must be big for you to be on the case. Some people are saying that this sordid, sexy tale is only the tip of the iceberg of what is becoming a PATTERN of covering-up and sex at the White House. Sex. White House. Sex. White House. Prostitution. Sleaze. White House. Clintoon. What's the latest?

SCRUME: (in a deep haughty tone) Lydia, the whole thing doesn't pass as what we in the White House press corps call the "small test". Many people have been asking why this reporter, known as "Jill Godfrey" to us, was lobbing softballs at the President. Sex. President. Sleaze. So, as Lucyemma reported, the PATRIOTIC BLOGGERS have led the way on this, discovering that "Jill Godfrey" was actually "June Godzinksi" and that, not only did she take a vacation as a child only 90 miles from the well-known Whitewater area of Arkansas, but that she has been running triple-X websites under the nickname "Madame X".

(audience gasps, tsks, shaking heads in disgust)

FESTER: Yes, Brent, it's disgusting. Filthy. Sleazy, Clinton, sex, prostitution. Phil, do we have that picture of Madame X? Yes, the clean one, you bad boy!

(audience titters)



Brent, are we absolutely sure that THIS is the same woman known as "Jill Godfrey" to us in Washington?

SCRUME: There is little wiggle room on this one, if you look at the picture of the reporter "Jill Godfrey"...

FESTER: Let's bring the picture of up of the reporter, Phil...



(audience GASPS)

FESTER: Oh my gosh. Yes, that's her. Audience? Do you have any doubt? Sex, Clintoon, sex, dominatrix prostitution?

(audience in near rapturous applause............