Reply #50: I want to add something to this

[noamnety]

I said it's the woman's decision in the end, although the guy should feel free to voice his opinion. In my case, an unplanned pregnancy, I would have had an abortion, but the father talked me out of it. And that's fine, I have no regrets about that at all.

But also, I should point out, during those few weeks when I was pregnant and in the hospital on an IV, when I had lost 20 pounds in two weeks from complications, he chose to head out hitchhiking with his buddy, on a drinking camping trip. Certainly that has affected my thinking on who gets to make the decision.

During the pregnancy, I was the only responsible party, because I had no choice. He had the option to come and go as he pleased. I didn't have the option of leaving him on an IV hatching our kid while I took "a break from the stress." The irony of him deciding that I should carry the child, while he took a vacation because the stress wasn't good for him, and of the nurses assuming my supervisor was my husband because he visited me in the hospital more, hasn't left me.

(Should mention my kid's a sweetheart, number one in her class, all the typical braggy stuff you'd expect a parent to say, it's all true in her case)