Reply #8: ok

[HootieMcBoob]

Our baby cribs were covered with bright colored
lead-based paint.

(so go out and buy your kid some leadbased paint covered cribs. That'll fix things for sure?

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors
or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes, we had no
helmets. (Not to mention the risks we took hitchhiking.)

As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.

Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was
always a special treat.

(Ok, just outlaw childproof caps and make sure that your kids have easy access to poisons. Also, outlaw seatbelts, airbags, helmets and force kids to ride in the backs of pickup trucks. That'll fix things for sure.)

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. Horrors!

(So, force your kid to drink from the garden hose! No more drinking from bottles! All of our problems solved.)

We ate cupcakes, bread ! and butter, and drank soda pop
with sugar in it, but we were never overweight because
we were always outside playing.

(This is a simple one. Force your kids to eat all kinds of simple carbs and processed foods and make them run around outside and all of our countries problems will be solved.)

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one
bottle, and no one actually died from this.

(This is shocking! When did the government outlaw sharing?!)

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of
scraps and then rode down the hill, only to find out
we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a
few times, we learned to solve the problem.

(So make your kids build flimsy vehicles and push them downhills into shrubery. All of our problems solved!)

We would leave home in the morning and play all day,
as long as we were back when the street lights came
on. No one was able to reach us all day. No cell phones. Unthinkable!

(This one is a very good idea. Kick your kids out of the house in the morning and don't let them back in until night. Any contact with them throughout the day is completely forbidden. All of our nation's problems solved.)

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo 64, X-Boxes, no
video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, video
tape movies, surround sound, personal cell phones,
personal computers, or Internet chat rooms.

(So, don't buy them any of that stuff? Use a little of that personal willpower! All of our problems solved.)

We had friends! We went outside and found them.

(Force your children to go outside and talk to strangers. All of our problems solved.)

We played dodge ball, and sometimes, the ball would really hurt.

(Make your kids line up and have balls hurled at them at high speeds. Things just keep getting better all the time!)

We fell out of trees, got cut and broke bones and
teeth, and there were no lawsuits from these
accidents. They were accidents. No one was to blame
but us. Remember accidents?

(Insist that your children and other peoples children too, why limit things, put themselves into dangersous situations in high places. I can feel the country getting better by the minute.)

We had fights and punched each other and got black and blue and learned to get over it.

(encourage your children to fight with each other. physical violence preferable. Ahhh I feel betteer.)

We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and ate
worms, and although we were told it would happen, we
did not put out very many eyes, nor did the worms live
inside us forever.

(Make your kids eat worms. nuff said.)

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's home and knocked
on the door, or rang the bell or just walked in and talked to them.

(encourage your kids to walk into the homes of neighbors. even the ones who keep loaded weapons on hand to discourage intruders.)

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the
team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment.

(Make sure your children are disappointed. Much better.)

Some students weren't as smart as others, so they
failed a g! rade and were held back to repeat the same
grade. Horrors! Tests were not adjusted for any
reason. Our actions were our own. Consequences were expected.

(Force George W. Bush to repeat first grade and start over! We are really getting better now!)

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke a law was unheard of.
They actually sided with the law. Imagine that!

(Put W. in jail for his drug use and drunk driving and awol/dissertion. Say, this is really helping!)

This generation has produced some of the best
risk-takers and problem solvers and inventors, ever.

(Like Ken Lay and oh I don't have the energy...)

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas

(Like cell phones and playstations and health foods and bottled water and seatbelts and airbags, etc.)

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility,
and we learned how to deal with it all. And you're one of them!

(We also have 40 million uninsured and the highest infant mortality rate in the industrialized world...)

Congratulations.

(Gee thanks)

Please pass this on to others who have had the luck to
grow up as kids, before lawyers and government
regulated our lives, for our own good...

(OK)

Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors?

(Please, be my guest)