I Troll (found on Glenn Greenwald's letters on Salon)

[Fumesucker]

I have no talent for critical thinking; I am wholly incapable of discerning facts, presenting a coherent viewpoint incorporating salient facts, or mastering even the barest rudiments of logical argument.

My "perspective", such as it is, is a myopic hodge-podge of legacy reactionary bumper-sticker clichés coeval with coprolites, drowned in the greasy gravy of corporate media-manufactured neocon wingnut talking points.

I have a formidable capacity for intolerance, unreasoning contempt, and leaden snark. I believe that my country is the strongest and greatest country in the world, and that perforce its policies and conduct, domestically and internationally, is always Right-- because Might Makes Right, of course. What world are you living in?

I despise those who challenge this view, or seek to erode and dislodge the keystone of unreasoning Zealous Patriotic Faith that supports the soul of the Greatest Country in the World, the U S of A, in its never-ending battle against the Forces of Evil, i.e. Everybody Else (except Israel and the other members of Our Hegemony).

In my world, crass name-calling, snide caricatures, and poorly-crafted personal put-downs and cheap shots are recognized as legitimate tactics in making points and winning arguments-- because, lacking intellectual acumen, depth, sophistication, and discernment, these clumsy skills are all we've got.

The proof of their efficacy can be seen in the applause and attaboys frequently expressed by my Troll Brethren in these comments; they confirm that I effortlessly steamroller over the pathetic and treacherous sedition disseminated on sites like this.

Cognitive dissonance is my friend; it keeps me strong and indomitable.

Little Brother


Edited to add author's handle.

[mmonk]

1. LOL

Very good.

[barbtries]

2. he nails it

leaden snark. love that.

[pacalo]

3. I find a lot of this viewpoint in the comments section of YouTube.

Before I discovered the internet, I liked to think that the majority of people were basically good & level-headed. The internet has taught me how naive I was.

Because of YouTube's word limit in the comments section, perhaps some of these paragraphs could be used to hold a mirror up to some of these ignorant creeps' faces.

Very good post.

[Fumesucker]

4. You have to be able to see yourself in a mirror..

In order to engage in self-reflection.

When you are a psychic vampire it's hard to see yourself from outside, there is no outside it is all about you.

[Fumesucker]

5. "The internet has taught me how naive I was."

:rofl:

I only thought I was cynical before I got online.

[pacalo]

7. Your answer sounds like my husband --

He's the cynic (& you haven't met one until you've met mine) & I am the optimist who chooses to look for the best in people. :)

[Beam Me Up]

6. Yep. The Government Loyalist Manifesto. Perfect. n/t

[BlooInBloo]

8. Sounds like a Texas secessionist.

[tbyg52]

9. That's one of the funniest things I've read in a while - thanks!

Here's something in sort of the same vein I happened to run across today:

Although the right to 'peaceful possesion' of our own lives is not specifically enumerated in the Bill of Rights, it is strongly implied in the 4th Amendment. When I do something that offends or insults you, however inadvertent the offense may have been, however necessary to my point I may feel my phrasing was, still, what have I done but commit an 'unreasonable seizure' of one of your most precious possessions... your peace of mind? Without any kind of warrant, I have presumed to invade your emotional privacy and do you psychic trauma. With my thoughtless, heedless, inconsiderate speech or text, I have aggravated you, or angered you, or in some way offended you. Clearly, this is a violation of your basic human rights, and not to be tolerated or countenanced in any way.

When I interrupt the peace and comfort of your chosen life path, I have wronged you. I have, in a very real way, injured you. And I cannot argue that I have freedom of speech, because as I have already irrefutably demonstrated, all other rights and freedoms must necessarily be considered less important than the right of 'peaceful possession' of one's own personal life experience. If my exercise of any of my other rights causes your peace of mind to in any way be lessened or diminished, I am in the wrong. Once you make me aware of my intrusion, my monumental violation of your basic human rights, as a civil, mature human being I must immediately apologize, offer compensation for the damage I have done to your peace of mind, and undertake to never repeat the objectionable behavior again.

More:
http://tpmcafe.talkingpointsmemo.com/talk/blogs/doc_nebula/2009/04/my-profound-epiphany.php?ref=recmuck