to make themselves feel superior / better about themselves. It's one of those social norms that everyone is expected to conform to and one that for MOST people is easy to do. We all know how we all want to seem "normal" or even better "perfect", the better we fit that model of the perfect citizen the prouder we are. Loving your parents/siblings and "showing them affection" is just another item that people can tick off the list and say "see I'm a model citizen". And it's one that is usually easy to tick off because for the majority the feelings ARE real.
The thing people fail to realize is love is something that's fucking earned like any other emotion. Love doesn't just spring forth from emptiness, you do or don't do things that foster the feeling over the years. It just so happens that MOST parents and siblings are nice enough to each other that love does indeed naturally develop over the years. But there's certainly no reason why one should HAVE to love a parent that abused them or raised them in a toxic environment. It's sad that even this much is blasphemous to say but I stick by it.
Then there is the whole existential argument about what it means to be "normal". How society all wants everyone to fit this cookie cutter definition. People are threatened by people who don't immediately have the right robotic emotional responses to events. I don't know you so there's no way for me to know if what you describe comes from a pathology or not, or whether it's right or wrong. You MIGHT have an issue, don't get me wrong, but don't trust the visceral reaction that OMG there must be something wrong with me if I feel this way, for the above reasons among others.
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