Today's War on Christmas joke [View all]
Little Rotten Johnny, the worst kid in the world, asked his mother for paper and pencil to write a letter to Santa Claus.
"Little Rotten Johnny, you've been so bad this year Santa Claus doesn't want to hear from you. You need to write to the Baby Jesus."
Okay, thought LRJ, if that's what I gotta do...he sat down at the table and wrote, "Dear Baby Jesus, I want lots of wonderful presents and I promise to be good all year long."
No. You can't lie to the Baby Jesus. So he threw that one away and started again:
"Dear Baby Jesus, I want lots of wonderful presents and I promise to be good for a whole month."
No. Into the trash.
"Dear Baby Jesus, I want lots of wonderful presents and I promise to be good for a whole week."
No. Into the trash.
By the time he managed to write a believable letter he knew the Baby Jesus wouldn't be interested in him being good for a whole millisecond and decided to take another approach to the subject. He dug around under the bed until he found a shoebox and some t-shirts. He went into the living room and got the Madonna from the nativity scene on the mantel. He carefully wrapped the figurine, put it in the box, and buried the box under all the stuff in his closet. Then he went back to the table and took pencil in hand...
"Dear Baby Jesus, if you ever want to see your mother again..."
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