SEE the reality of CPR. The reality of intubation. The reality of no oxygen to your brain for long periods of time. The reality of years of dialysis and chemotherapy and cutting off your toes one by one by one by foot by leg....
I am an RN and so is my husband. We are very clear in our wishes to each other and to our families--NOTHING. NOTHING is to be done. I don't WANT cpr. I don't WANT the resulting anoxic brain injury. Whatever caused me to go into cardiac arrest isn't REMOVED by CPR... it's still there and will probably still kill me.
My mom's got end stage kidney disease and is who knows how long away from Diaysis. There's not much she can do to reverse her course, but there's a lot she can do to halt its progression, but her attitude is "oh that's okay, a lady I work with's mom had dialysis for thirty years and did just fine"....mom, you have NO idea what dialysis is. 3-4 sessions a week WITHOUT FAIL. 4+ hour sessions WITHOUT FAIL. Only able to start IV's in the non-fistula arm> Go to the hospital, you're gonna be admitted. And then the resulting health issues from bad kidneys...heart, lung, brain, strokes, diabetes....she has no idea.
I try to explain to her. I see this EVERY. FUCKING. DAY. Dialysis from kidney failure from diabetes or other things. HOrrible way to live. And 30 years on...please....someone who's been on dialysis for 30 years is hardly in the prime state of health. She hates going to the Dr every few months as it is....there's no way she can keep up the schedule with dialysis WITHOUT FAIL and the more frequent MD visits.
Nope...when it's my time, it's my time. No vents, no tubes, no compressions. I'm 37...I don't care if I'm 40 or 90. Let me go. Don't let me be a vegetable. Don't do that to me, and don't do that to my family. It's much harder to unplug than to never plug in to begin with.
it kills me...we get these 95 (no shit) year old people from nursing homes. Full codes. They have multiple strokes, are incontinent, haven't spoken since the mid 1990's, contractured limbs, frequent seizures, tube in their belly for feeding, tube in their ass for shitting, tube in their wang for pissing, tube in their throat for breathing...but please, full code. Do everything. That's what mom wanted. Really? Mom wanted to be covered in bed sores and wasting away and fed liquefied emulsion for nutrition and weekly hospital visits and falls and inoperable broken hips and broken ribs from CPR? When she's 95??? That's what mom wanted??? I don't think that's what Mom wanted at all....
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