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In reply to the discussion: I'm done, too. [View all]BainsBane
(53,032 posts)That you're not all feminists mantra is an excuse. If I say I'm going to the store to buy peaches, no one imagines I am buying every peach in creation. If I say I'm a Minnesotan, no one things I mean I am every Minnesotan. I am one person, and I have the right to identify as a feminist or anything else I want to. That argument is used as a way to undermine the very being of the feminist you're talking to, in this case me. It is also a pretty damn good example of mansplaining. I can think of nothing more arrogant than a man telling a woman she's not a real feminist because she doesn't do his bidding. That you even think you have the right now to determine who is a feminist tells me yourself as having some sort of authority over women. What makes you think your opinion about who is a feminist matters? What makes you think you have a right to decide such things? You do not. I have never seen you once speak out for women's rights. I've seen you invoke the label of feminism as a way to tell women what they care about doesn't matter. I consider that cynical and manipulative.
You really aren't in a position to call me hostile. I never called you out in a thread or scapegoated you for some random alert. I never had any awareness of your existence until that thread. Your comment about hostility is all about the fact that you think women owe you something. I owe you exactly nothing. I don't need to be nice to you, curry favor with you, or concern myself even minimally with what you want. Why you think you get to insult people and then expect them to cater to your feelings is beyond me. You chose to make enemies out of some of the feminists on this site by scapegoating us. Congratulations. You succeeded, at least with me.
As for whining, that is again is reflective of your assumption that the issues I care about don't matter. That is emblematic of your hostility to feminism, and yes I use that term generally. Your position on that woman in Boston raped in view of the public wasn't exactly forward thinking. Telling me I'm a whiner is about denigrating my efforts to articulate concerns I care about. Feminist is the last thing I would call someone who thinks he and not women is the arbiter of which issues matter.