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In reply to the discussion: Why is it some men get all offended if a woman they don't know is wary around them? [View all]Gormy Cuss
(30,884 posts)261. Exactly right -- it's the huffy reaction to someone shutting down the conversation that stands out.
That suggests an entitlement of some sort, that people should always want to converse with the person.
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Why is it some men get all offended if a woman they don't know is wary around them? [View all]
Brigid
Oct 2012
OP
Me too. It is a stupid "line" and deserves an ignore. Implying that you are a "naughty" girl
anneboleyn
Oct 2012
#125
Yes, and if they are sincere they feel they are being prejudged as slimy.
The Wielding Truth
Oct 2012
#252
a man made a suggestion with that, that i really liked. slow pace a tad and let
seabeyond
Oct 2012
#29
Indeed. I walk really fast, so I catch up to people all the time without realizing it
arcane1
Oct 2012
#51
I'm a woman and many, many times I've been walking behind another woman,
Arugula Latte
Oct 2012
#203
That's an odd statement, if he said "how you doing" that wouldn't be quite so strange. nt
Raine
Oct 2012
#6
Why is it some black people get all offended when a salesperson follows them around a store?
Llewlladdwr
Oct 2012
#7
Of course not. No one is obligated to speak to a stranger if they don't wish to.
Llewlladdwr
Oct 2012
#46
He wasn't being 'prejudged' which is a way of saying she's intolerant. His remark caused him to be
freshwest
Oct 2012
#227
One person initiated unasked-for contact. Guess which one that was genius?
Starry Messenger
Oct 2012
#120
By that logic, men must wait for conversation to be intitated by the woman or else its bad?
cleanhippie
Oct 2012
#209
I was 16 the first time a 70 year old man told me he wanted me to suck his cock at a bus stop
Starry Messenger
Oct 2012
#220
Come on now, that is not the same thing thy happened here and you know it.
cleanhippie
Oct 2012
#231
No one has any way to know how anything is going to happen before it happens.
cleanhippie
Oct 2012
#287
No, by that logic, men must assess woman's body language before he decides to initiate contact.
KitSileya
Oct 2012
#222
Awesome. Next step, make sure the entire world gets your decree and follows it.
cleanhippie
Oct 2012
#232
So, do you think "Are you staying out of trouble?" is a good way to start a conversation?
Gormy Cuss
Oct 2012
#257
Probably, in a roundabout way. More specifically though, it's THIS monstrosity...
Romulox
Oct 2012
#300
I'm a guy and have been asked the same question many times throughout life
TheKentuckian
Oct 2012
#354
More like how we put people in jail even before a trial. Just common sense. nt
Tien1985
Oct 2012
#171
Like crossing the street if one sees an African American, for example? "Benign prudence"?
Romulox
Oct 2012
#190
are you suggesting women should have NO concern and take NO cautious steps? nt
seabeyond
Oct 2012
#191
I am just using PRECISELY THE SAME LOGIC as to skin color as you are to gender.
Romulox
Oct 2012
#192
romulox, again i ask, are you suggesting women not be concerned and not be cautious?
seabeyond
Oct 2012
#194
Around African Americans, or around men? One answer is "benign", the other is vile. nt
Romulox
Oct 2012
#212
it sounds to me you are implying women should not be cautious or concerned around strange men,
seabeyond
Oct 2012
#214
I asked *you* to explain why gender based prejudice is "benign", while race-based is not.
Romulox
Oct 2012
#295
Here's the difference. Most women who react this way have first hand experiences
Gormy Cuss
Oct 2012
#259
Um, dubious logic. "Actual experience" isn't usually put forward as a defense of racism. nt
Romulox
Oct 2012
#296
No, that's exactly my point and why the two situations are fundamentally different.
Gormy Cuss
Oct 2012
#299
Um, no, still not clear. I grew up in a rough neighborhood. I've been assaulted by people of color
Romulox
Oct 2012
#301
No, but if your experience makes you wary of people with certain attributes
Gormy Cuss
Oct 2012
#328
A woman is much more likely to be abused by someone she knows than a stranger, so no...
Romulox
Oct 2012
#298
No I don't, though I sincerely doubt it even come close to the number harmed by intimate partners.
Romulox
Oct 2012
#307
If I was sitting down waiting for a bus I would bring a cellphone and pretend I'm talking or
southernyankeebelle
Oct 2012
#8
You are on the right track. Women usually like to size a person up.
southernyankeebelle
Oct 2012
#184
You make many good points. There is one rude way to get rid of him. Tell him to get
southernyankeebelle
Oct 2012
#186
You have the curse of beauty, LOL. I have never had that problem. But I do remember
southernyankeebelle
Oct 2012
#285
wish I could rec this--would you consider posting it as a separate OP? it needs to be said, and read
niyad
Oct 2012
#199
I guess I could. Where do you think I should put it--in General Discussion as well?
tblue37
Oct 2012
#246
That works, as long as you remember to bury the camera and the body separately. n/t
gkhouston
Oct 2012
#40
I don't do that, but I can imagine any man falsely accused of date rape would be tempted to.
Zalatix
Oct 2012
#72
That's not true. It is only your impression. I've stayed out of these debates because of always
upaloopa
Oct 2012
#205
One reaction to cat calls was to make the sign of scissors snipping something. Shut 'em right up.
freshwest
Oct 2012
#160
Agree. And years and years ago, more people knew their neighbors and others in their communities.nt
raccoon
Oct 2012
#179
Exactly right -- it's the huffy reaction to someone shutting down the conversation that stands out.
Gormy Cuss
Oct 2012
#261
Because it's easier to get pissed at you than at their fellow men who harass women.
Brickbat
Oct 2012
#19
It's terrible. I've had some pretty bad experiences with men feeling entitled for
JaneyVee
Oct 2012
#21
From the female perspective: GET THE HELL AWAY! Ahem. That would mean: SAY LOUDLY, "I HAVE YOUR
WinkyDink
Oct 2012
#81
Agree. Joe, I think your intentions were good, but why in the world you wouldn't just
spooky3
Oct 2012
#368
speaking loudly about sunglasses (not shouting) is far less threatening than touching someone
spooky3
Oct 2012
#369
Yep, and not trying to start a conversation by asking personal questions, however vague n/t
arcane1
Oct 2012
#68
i like your story. i interact all the time. i love the connection. i have also had men do what
seabeyond
Oct 2012
#174
As a guy, I try to be very careful what I say to women that I don't know ... and even some of those
JoePhilly
Oct 2012
#41
Same here. It's really not that hard to tell who might be interested in talking to you.
stevenleser
Oct 2012
#251
Women only think they're in danger when an unattractive male shows them attention.
Comrade_McKenzie
Oct 2012
#137
I sure hope you forgot the sarcasm icon--would hate to think that remark was serious
niyad
Oct 2012
#260
Grrr, that one gets on my nerves...How's "Nonya fucking bidness grab ya?" sheesh.
pnwest
Oct 2012
#58
In the situation described in the OP, it was the man who got all pissy. n/t
Jamastiene
Oct 2012
#282
Where are YOU from, that that's "a really common statement" TO A COMPLETE STRANGER?
WinkyDink
Oct 2012
#84
There are quite a few men who think they are entitled to a conversation with any woman
Lex
Oct 2012
#63
"The nicest guy, the guy with no self-serving agenda whatsoever, the one who wants nothing from
WinkyDink
Oct 2012
#87
How completely illogical of a response. Especially as my original DEALT WITH THIS. But even if you
WinkyDink
Oct 2012
#95
You'll never know? Then you are replying without having read the full original? FINE. HERE:
WinkyDink
Oct 2012
#103
What I find indefensible is your assertion men have no reason to fear a strange woman.
Llewlladdwr
Oct 2012
#134
Re-read the OP. A man was so cautious he returned TO that woman. BTW: Are you the editing police?
WinkyDink
Oct 2012
#104
Okay, I see. You believe women to be less violent than men because of socialization.
Llewlladdwr
Oct 2012
#139
Please see my post 165 below. It might help you understand why women feel violated
tblue37
Oct 2012
#168
Statsitics might help. But whatever, the point remains as to which gender is the more violent.
WinkyDink
Oct 2012
#97
it happens often. and most are realitistic enough to recognize it. you arent the dude,
seabeyond
Oct 2012
#173
Welcome to DU... the place where small penis jokes are fine but calling someone "honey" is not. nt
Comrade_McKenzie
Oct 2012
#133
You know I have always showed disdain for women haters when i meet them. And they do...
hrmjustin
Oct 2012
#143
I hate that inane question. Some people ask it generically to men/women/whatever.
stevenleser
Oct 2012
#180
BS...I've seen white females physically recoil if a black man gets in the elevator
HipChick
Oct 2012
#208
Do they defend their racism on DU and get overwhelming support for it, though? I think not. nt
Romulox
Oct 2012
#213
well, no (regular) guy wants themselves perceived as a danger. on the other hand THIS guy made a
dionysus
Oct 2012
#193
Men do *not* have the right to start any conversation they want in any manner they want.
KitSileya
Oct 2012
#224
You are sadly mistaken and clearly do not "get" how a woman walks through this world.
WinkyDink
Oct 2012
#350
What do you mean by "He got all huffy before he went down the street"? Did he SAY something to you?
cleanhippie
Oct 2012
#210
For some men, once you say "hi" they think oral sex is already a high probability.
aikoaiko
Oct 2012
#219
You got off easy with what your Mom told you. The talk I gave my daughter was much
Whovian
Oct 2012
#221
I am under no obligation to be "nice" to a numbskull just to spare his fragile little ego.
Brigid
Oct 2012
#353
I think I have just read some of the craziest responses I have ever seen on the DU
renie408
Oct 2012
#264
Why does he have a right to get huffy for being "rebuffed" for creepiness?
obamanut2012
Oct 2012
#327
That's a have you stopped beating your wife question. You should have stepped on his foot and asked
lonestarnot
Oct 2012
#270
I had a similar experience with a guest who was a man... Just because I didn't
glowing
Oct 2012
#305
No one is required to prove anything to another person about that other person's
patrice
Oct 2012
#309
No, that type of creep would have read the response as being an invitation for more conversation.
spooky3
Oct 2012
#370