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In reply to the discussion: Where do you stand on homeschooling? [View all]MADem
(135,425 posts)I don't claim to be an expert, but the few anecdotal experiences I have had with it--acquaintances who homeschool, specifically--makes me think it absolutely SUCKS for the kids, and the parents I have known who do it have an over-inflated impression of their ability to teach their children. The kids are precocious in some areas, dumb as fucking dirt and miles behind their peers in others, frequently awkward in social situations where "schooled" kids are comfortable, confident and at ease, and while "free spiritedness" is all fine and dandy, a nation of kids like that would be a nation of questionably productive workers.
If the public schools stink and the private ones are too pricey, you might consider religious schools. I'd suck it up, send 'em to Catholic school, a Lutheran school, an Episcopal school--one of the "liturgical" ones--frankly, the standards are generally higher at those-- and tell them to ignore the religious stuff if it didn't suit your worldview. They'll at least get the basics there.
The other alternative is to send them to the shitty public school and personally supplement their education with enrichment programs (field trips disguised as family outings, summer science camp, writing camp, online programs, classes at community college and "lifelong learning" opportunities offered by towns/cities, for example) and some afternoon/weekend investment of your time filling in the gaps. Of course, that does take commitment of the 'above and beyond' sort. You also have to make it clear to the kid that it's not negotiable, too bad if it isn't what their friends do, and then follow through and make 'em do the extra work. If the kids are halfway bright they should have no trouble doing their schoolwork and the "extra" stuff you ask of them as well.
I think the social interaction that children learn in the school setting is at least as valuable as the "book learning." The sports programs, the sex ed, the dances, the fighting, the "seeing kids act like assholes and learning from it" thing--all of that helps a kid move from childhood to adulthood. Shielding kids from that stuff stunts their growth. By dealing with the good and bad of social interaction, children learn those 'cues' that tell them what to expect when they see people acting a certain way.
Bottom line though--a parent has got to parent. It doesn't matter if the school is the best in the world, if the kid isn't getting any guidance from the "folks."
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