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Wolf Frankula

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Member since: Fri Jun 4, 2010, 11:02 PM
Number of posts: 3,119

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Since Christmas Song Season is almost over, Here are Some

Good King Stephen

"Good King Stephen looked outside,
On the Feast of Wenzel.
Slapped his pocket and exclaimed,
'I have lost my pencil!'

While a lackey standing near
A window drew a stencil.
And a rooster crowed quite loud,
Sitting on a fencil hmmm.

Then King Stephen went outdoors,
Into the night so cru-el.
And he saw a poor man there,
Gath'ring winter fu-el.

He said 'That I'm still up north,
I feel like a foo-el.
If I were in Cape Town now,
I'd be by the poo-el hmmm."

Do You See What I See?

Said the night wind to the little lamb,
Do you see what I see?
Way up in the sky silly sheep,
Do you see what I see?
A star, a star dancing in the night, with a tail as big as a kite, (What's a kite), with a tail as big as a kite.

Said the little lamb to the shepherd boy,
Do you hear what I hear?
Bellowing like a poxy goat.
Do you hear what I hear?
A song, a song sounding o'er the trees,
with a voice as big as the seas, with a voice as big as the seas.

Said the shepherd boy to the mighty king,
'I just heard a sheep talk.
I know you won't believe a thing.
But I just heard a sheep talk.
A sheep, a sheep, a wooly little sheep. Won't you please call my analyst.
I think I'm cracking up.

Said the mighty king to the little lamb.
'You'd taste good well roasted.'
And so they ate the little lamb.
And he was good well roasted.
With mint sauce and a fine rose wine
O what a feast that was.
I wish I'd been there.

[Some have the custom of shouting BILLY RAM BAM! every time the word lamb is sung, but that's not part of the song and you shouldn't do it.]

I Hate Snow!

Oh, the weather outside's disgusting,
My water pipes are busting.
In my basement the waters flow,
I hate snow! I hate snow! I hate snow!

The cold weather has me wheezing,
My hands and feet are freezing,
And I want the whole world to know,
I hate snow! I hate snow! I hate snow!

I hate going out in the storm,
So my suitcase I am packing.
My tickets are in my hand.
I'm going where it is warm.

To make like snow's a failure.
So I'm off to south Australia.
And I'll bask in the sun's warm glow,
Far from snow, far from snow, far from snow.

Flying to a Summer Wonderland

Sleigh bells ring, I'm not listening.
On the road, Ice is glistening,
I gave up the fight, I'm leaving tonight,
Flying to a summer wonderland.

Gone away is the swallow,
And quite soon I will follow.
My bags are all packed, my money is sacked
Flying to a summer wonderland.

On the beaches we will have a barbie,
As the sun tans our skins to gold.
We'll have shrimp and salad at the Barbie,
And the beer will be the only thing that's cold.

Later on by the fire,
We will plot and conspire.
and find us a way, that we can both stay.
Staying in a summer wonderland

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Mon Dec 25, 2017, 03:17 PM (1 replies)

Happy Solstice to Everybody

Here's a song for the season.

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Thu Dec 21, 2017, 06:09 PM (3 replies)

Chanukah Starts Today

Happy Chanukah to all our Jewish members.

Here's a version of the Chanukah song by Neil Diamond.

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Tue Dec 12, 2017, 05:01 PM (3 replies)

New Christmas Specials This Year

Rudolph's Big Career Move: After being scorned and then cheered by the other reindeer, Rudolph tells the frontrunners to FOAD. He moves to Detroit and becomes the mascot of the Detroit Stags Soccer team. (Animated)

Frosty's Frozen Hell: It's always winter in Christmastown. Eventually the carbon dioxide freezes out of the air and all the plants die, followed by the animals. The mentally challenged snowman clubfoots through six inane songs as the surrounding ecology dies. (Cheap jerky animation by bargain basement animators)

Flying to a Summer Wonderland: Maine couple Ernie and Janet decide to fly to Bermuda for Christmas. Follow them through the airport and onto the island. They don't miss the cold weather but have to listen to North Dakota farmers complain about their small subsidies and welfare chiselers.

Yes, Santa Claus, There is a Virginia: Santa Clause wonderes if there is just a big empty spot south of Maryland. He learns, to his delight, there IS a Virginia, and a North and South Carolina, too. (animated)

Rump's Christmas Surprise: Christmas episode of Rump, a sitcom about a moron who thinks he's President. In the Christmas episode, Rump learns the true meaning of Christmas, as he's put on trial for treason.

South Sun Santa: Father Christmas is overworked so he looks for some help to handle the Southern Hemisphere. The elves pick Harry Lassiter a retiring Sydney, Australia businessman with a soft spot for kids. At first he's reluctant, (He hates cold weather and declares "I've never been north of the Congo River and I have no intention of going." He is talked into it and moves to Elf Island, off the coast of South Africa. See him drive wagons pulled by flying springboks, supersonic penguins and otherwise deal with his new status.

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Wed Nov 29, 2017, 03:29 PM (2 replies)

Black Friday.

First here's a song.

And we got through the 22nd and 23rd without a Jackabang conspiracy clown cluster, and Thanksgiving without the Pilgrim bash and guilt wallow.

Thanks to everyone.

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Sat Nov 25, 2017, 12:59 AM (1 replies)

The Beatles SAVED Rock and Roll

In the mid sixties it was declining into a bunch of sound alike Frankies and Bobbies, with Fabian as an example of the worst. (The author probably doesn't know what 'Doing a Fabian' is, which is taking a face and promoting it, regardless of talent, into stardom.) The Beatles put musicianship, composing, and breadth of interest and feeling into rock and roll. After them, rock and roll song writers could be composers, not just Tin Pan Alley like hacks.

I expect Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr to write, "How Elijah Wald Destroyed Folk Music". But Wald is basically a wackademic, and we all know wackademics don't live in the real world, they live in wackademia, where things are the way they are because they're that way in the book.

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Sun Oct 29, 2017, 05:44 PM (0 replies)

Would we be better off if Twitter IS what Opus thought it was

A chatroom for birds? Just asking. I am not on Twitter and don't plan to be.

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Sat Oct 14, 2017, 05:42 PM (3 replies)

Question about the phone on the Tardis

If you use it to call a cop, do you get him?

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Sat Sep 30, 2017, 01:52 PM (1 replies)

What's Your Favourite Song from 1797?

This is mine.

It's one of the most famous tunes in the world.

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Sat Aug 12, 2017, 04:58 PM (3 replies)

Is Door to Door Salesman a Dead Job?

I haven't seen a door to door salesman in 25 years. We get people soliciting for donations, petition signatures, JWs, Mormons, but never people just selling things.

What does the hive say?

Posted by Wolf Frankula | Wed Jul 12, 2017, 08:56 PM (23 replies)
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