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[Denninmi]

This message was self-deleted by its author (Denninmi) on Thu Feb 21, 2013, 03:16 AM. When the original post in a discussion thread is self-deleted, the entire discussion thread is automatically locked so new replies cannot be posted.

[Tobin S.]

1. That's about the age when a lot of people become severely ill

I was 20. Hopefully your post did some good and he will get help asap.

[intaglio]

3. The best therapy is helping others

because helping others lets you see the fault lines in your own reality, helps them and shows you are worth consideration and admiration.

Now spot the fault line in your post.

Firstly, doubt; unnecessary doubt. You have tried to help to the best of your ability and that is good no matter how great or small that ability. The "rightness" or "wrongness" of your action is not down to you it is down to the other accepting or not accepting help.

Second, negativity; where you say you cannot fix your own mess. You don't have to fix it all on your own, there are people who offer help, just as you have offered help.

Thirdly, over regretfulness; I'd love to do many things in my life over again - but I cannot, it is past. All I can do is to try not to make those same mistakes again and not dwell on them to the detriment of my life.

Fourth, fearing the future; if your correspondent is aided, if they respond, that is your doing. If they are not helped, if they do not respond that is their choice - not yours.

You have done a good thing for yourself and for your correspondent.

[Tobin S.]

6. Wonderful!

[intaglio]

7. It's nice to be up and you did well

but careful, the highs on the rollercoaster are as scary as the lows. Letting yourself go too high here is dangerous; so go gently, stay up but closer to the middle.

Keep breathing even, pace yourself for you are in it for the long run - that's the rest of your life (which will be good). Remember the gentle things, the calm things. Take time to smell the flowers.

And remember you did good!

[intaglio]

9. That's wonderful!

Just reminding you that self monitoring is the most difficult thing to do. The pharmaceuticals will assist but you have to add the finishing touches and it seems that you are doing that.

I always find that sometimes I forget or slide in my judgment, it happens but be aware it happens and don't rip to pieces if it happens - just get back on track and look for help if you need it.