Announcing the 2016 War on Christmas

[mahatmakanejeeves]

So I was at the Walmart yesterday afternoon, looking for a can of paint. I entered via the garden center. Uh-oh; it's not the garden center anymore.* It's the Christmas shop.

Artificial Christmas trees (it's still too soon for real ones). Some newfangled laser thiny that makes these moving patterns of snowflakes on a floor or any other surface, like your little brother's retina. On and on and on.

Not "holiday" displays. Christmas displays.

It's on.

* Yeah, but they had these swell potted cabbages and kale plants outside. I didn't see the price.

[progressoid]

1. I heard the Hershey's kiss ad on TV a few days ago.

Grrrr.

Can we at least get through Halloween first?

[TexasBushwhacker]

2. There has been Christmas stuff up at the "At Home" stores for weeks

They used to be "Garden Ridge Pottery".

[Hayduke Bomgarte]

3. I can't wait to wish my

Pretend, phony as a 3 dollar bill teabagger sister in law merry Xmas and see her grit her teeth.

It's always one of the highlights of the holidays for me.

[In_The_Wind]

4. Yup, get your-gotta-have-it-Christmas lights before all the good ones sell out.

[trof]

5. Sign me up. I wanna be a general.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

6. Home Depot has opened another front.

They've got their plants marked down at 50% off. In their place inside: fake poinsettias, fake Christmas trees, those teeny tiny little lights that don't look like Christmas lights at all.

We shall fight them on the beaches.

[uriel1972]

7. Once we take down Christmas...

We can take down commercialism... or is it the other way round

[Donkees]

8. ...and rows of motion-activated Christmas-talking-thingamajigs

[Liberalynn]

9. I saw an animatronic Santa in Walmart

he danced and a bunch of little kids were dancing with him.